midnight thoughts

a writer’s reality is arbitrary. things gain a life of their own. teeth may speak in mouths. voices may clamor from the surf. dreams are inspirations and the death knell. why the obsession with words? just soundthings given written form. meaning uttered from tremblings of meat. bounces of sound and light; pushings of atoms and photons. what defines importance? the inherent properness of living life? the RIGHT way to live? arbitrary. the consensual song denies arbitrariness and demands a code of rigour, a method to the madness, a conforming charade.

well, i won’t waltz. I’ll tango in the stead.

Bout of Existentialism

It’s one of these days that has an edginess, in the gray skies above, amid the motes that dangle in the stuffy air indoors, and inside the lethargic confusion within. A heavy futility settles upon you, and you fidget, knowing whatever you do isn’t of any importance, and you sink further in your scattered reverie as you realize any signification in your actions is a mirage. A directed aimless wandering with the primary concerns of the bodies food, sex, sleep in mind, and everything else is a just a irrelevant distraction we play at until the grave: an assured self-conscious strut in the street, finger-pricked tingle of pride in a small patch of embroidery, a heated weapons summit with big guns rooting for bigger guns, the turmoil of two lovers fracturing in a world-wreaking drama, the wolfish gaze of a politician upon his flock. Actions as physical objects in the mind, not quite different from the greed of consumerism. Moments are possessed by all as having intrinistic value and the utmost importance. Amid all the futile dramas of our vanity, there seems to be more worth–no, relevancy–crammed in a moment of minor Confucianism: man who eats a lot of carrots will shit orange.