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Parent Interview Project

Frida E. Trueba

The University of Michigan

Psych 250: Intro to Developmental Psychology

Dr. Kathleen M. Jodl

September 30th, 2022

Cultural Variations in parenting

When it comes to styles of parenting, there isn’t one exact way of doing so. Every child

has grown up in different ways and many parents have chosen to care for their children in certain

ways because of how and where they grew up. A big factor that contributes to how a person

decides to parent their child is the culture that they grew up in. In a study by Heidi Keller and

colleagues (2009), three different parenting styles were explored through three different samples

of families: western urban middle-class sample, rural village sample, and the non-western

middle-class sample. The three parenting styles that were explored were proximal, distal, and

autonomous related. Proximal parenting consists of a lot of close skin-to-skin contact with a

baby, distal parenting consists of more face to face and object stimulation, and an

autonomous-related style of parenting is a combination of both proximal and distal (Keller et al.

2009). The results of this study showed how parenting styles do differ between cultures when it

comes to proximal and distal. These research findings can be visibly seen through the

documentary Babies which follows four different babies from different cultures in the world and

focuses on how each baby is raised differently depending on their environment and the culture

they grow up in..

To look more into how and why culture can influence a person’s parenting style, a mom

named Phoebe was interviewed. Phoebe is a 48 year old woman who currently has a 22 year old

daughter, is a Mexican-American Chicana, has completed a Masters Degree in teaching and is

currently married. By looking at how Phoebe approached caring for her child and what her goals

were for her, it shows how one’s culture can have an influence on a person’s parenting style.

Infant Feeding & Sleeping Practices

With child care, there are different ways that parents can go about feeding them and the

sleeping arrangements that they have for the baby. When asked whether she breast fed or bottle

fed her daughter, Phoebe stated that she bottle fed her but it was a result of the lack of response

to the baby. Phoebe tried to breastfeed her daughter but the baby had no interest in the breast

milk and there were some possible issues with latching so, as a result, she decided to stick to

formula. When it came to the baby’s sleeping arrangements, she stated co-sleeping was the main

arrangement when her daughter was an early newborn as she wanted to be as close to her

daughter as possible. However, at a certain point she had her daughter in her own room in a crib

as she began to feel that co-sleeping may not be the safest option. When asked why she felt this

way, she stated that she feared that the baby would possibly suffocate. Based on Phoebe's

responses, it can be seen that she used more of an autonomous-related approach when it came to

where her daughter slept and used a more distal approach when it came to feeding her. The

decision to bottle feed her daughter shows a more distal way of parenting as not a ton of skin to

skin contact is occurring. This way of feeding isn’t uncommon as the documentary Babies (2010)

shows how babies in Tokyo and San Francisco are predominantly bottle fed and the combination

of co-sleeping and the use of a crib shows an autonomous-related way of parenting. The decision

to co-sleep with her daughter and then switch to a crib shows a more autonomous-related

approach as the skin to skin contact and closeness from the co-sleeping displays the proximal

approach and the switch to a crib in a separate room displays the distal approach.

It’s important to note that, when it comes to deciding whether to use a bottle or her breast,

Phoebe stated that if her daughter didn’t have latching issues she would’ve breastfed her

daughter the entire time. When asked what influenced her decisions, she said that it was a mix of
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family experience and medical recommendations. Phoebe mentioned how she made the effort to

follow what the doctor said but her mom would give her different recommendations and she

would sometimes follow those because, in Latino Culture, home remedies are believed to work

better than medicinal. Based on Phoebe's responses and her reasoning, it shows how one’s

culture and environment can have an impact on one's parenting decisions.

Parenting Styles

As previously mentioned, there are three types of parenting styles: Proximal, Distal, and

Autonomous-related. According to Keller et al. (2009), distal parenting is more connected with

urban middle class families, proximal parenting is more connected with rural mothers, and

autonomous-related parenting was connected to families who valued autonomy and relatedness

(p.413). Phoebe’s parenting style is more closely connected to autonomous-related as a result of

the environment she was in due to the fact that she was in the midst of working full time and

obtaining her masters degree during this time. When it came to interacting with the baby, Phoebe

engaged in more distal than proximal practices. She mentioned that holding the baby was

reassuring but when work needed to be done she would put the baby in a playpen with toys and

keep the baby close in terms of distance so she could see her when she couldn’t get the baby to

fall asleep. This distal practice can be seen in the Babies (2010) documentary as it displays how,

in Mongolia, San Francisco, and Tokyo, when the parents are working or cooking they usually

have the baby in a separate area at a distance. Additionally, since Phoebe was working so much,

she would leave her daughter with her grandma and, although she can’t remember the early

stages of it, over time the child wouldn’t necessarily cry when Phoebe left but would look out the

window as she left. Phoebe would exhibit proximal parenting practices during this time in her
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life by holding the baby close when watching tv or just not doing anything that required both of

her hands. As much as she would try to physically interact with her baby, due to the

circumstances she was in, it would be more difficult at times to accomplish that. Although

Phoebe engaged in an Autonomous-related parenting style, these distal practices aren’t

uncommon for people who have a middle class background. According to Keller et al.(2009),

“formal education affects mother-infant reactions, increasing face to face communication” when

looking at highly educated urban middle-class mothers.

Socialization Goals

A parent’s culture can have an influence on the socialization goals that they have for their

children. According to Keller et al. (2009), non-western urban middle class families that

represented the autonomous-related model valued autonomy and relatedness (p. 413). One of the

samples that they observed was from San Jose, Costa Rica. This is important to note as it shows

how Latino communities practice both distal and proximal parenting styles but autonomy is also

something that they push for their children. When it came to Phoebe’s goals for her daughter,

they were focused on obedience and cooperation because, at the time, she felt that if her daughter

knew that her baby knew what it meant to behave she would be able to make better choices and

develop better relationships with people. Keller et al. (2009) states how the “proximal parenting

style is predominant in subsistence societies in which socialization goals that embody

relatedness, obedience, and hierarchy are preferred” (p.412). Due to this, it isn’t surprising that

this is something the Latino community would make sure to socialize their kids to be as they

focus on both proximal and distal practices.

However, Phoebe’s goals for her daughter ended up backfiring a bit as her daughter's

interactions with others became awkward for her because she didn’t know how to react as

Phoebe felt that “she was probably waiting to be told what to do”. As a result of this impact on

her daughter’s social development, Phoebe believes that having a big focus on obedience and

cooperation, took away from her child's ability to develop the skills needed to interact with

others, thus hindering the ability for her child to become independent. From Phoebe’s responses,

it can be concluded that Latino cultural values definitely had an influence on her goals for her

daughter’s socialization skills. As previously mentioned, obedience is a socialization goal that is

preferred by urban middle class families (Keller et al., 2009). This way of thinking is clearly

evident with Phoebe as obedience and cooperation were her main goals for her daughter.

However, it’s important to note that even though this type of socialization preference is

prominent in the culture, it doesn’t mean its effectiveness is consistent for every child.

In conclusion, there are cultural variations in parenting as the environment and culture

that a person grows up in has an influence on their parenting decisions. Phoebe shows us this

through her decisions when it comes to sleeping practices, socialization goals, and her parenting

style. It’s evident from her responses that growing up in a Latino family that was also surrounded

by European western culture had an impact on her parenting style and how autonomous-related

that style became. Phoebe’s case is just one of the many examples of how variations in parenting

are a result of both cultural and environmental factors and that no one parenting style is perfect.
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APA References

Keller, H., Borke, J., Staufenbiel, T., Yovsi, R.D., Abels, M., et al. (2009). Distal and proximal

parenting as alternative parenting strategies during infants’ early months of life: A

cross-cultural study. International Journal of Behavioral Development, 33, 412-420.

Balmès, T. (Director) (2010) Babies [Film].Universal City, CA, Universal Studios Home

Entertainment.https://digitalcampus-swankmp-net.proxy.lib.umich.edu/umichdatabase28

6031/play/f53ea345cfab3658?referrer=direct
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Interview Notes

Parent Interview Notes (My mother = Phoebe)

Part I. Background Information

1. What is your ethnic, racial, cultural and/or socioeconomic background?

I am a 1st generation Mexican American, Chicana, with a middle class background

2. Did you go to college? What’s your highest level of education?

Attended undergrad at UIC and received Masters of Art in Teaching from National Louis university in

Chicago

3. Briefly describe your family structure (e.g., married, divorced, single-parent, co-parent).

Custodial parent, baby lived with her the majority of the time. Other parent had visitation rights

(Separated NOT Divorced)

4. Do you have any children? If so, how many and what are their ages & sex assigned at

birth?

Has 1 child, Female and 22yrs old

Part II. Infant Feeding & Sleeping Practices

1. Was your baby breast or bottle fed at birth? If breast-fed, for how long? Why did you

decide on this feeding arrangement? What do you think influenced your decision to breast or

bottle feed your baby?

Attempted to Breastfeed, may have been latching issues so decided to supplement with formula.

Realized that the baby had no interest in breastmilk so stuck to formula. Since the baby wasn’t feeding,

milk production decreased. Influenced decision → lack of response from the baby.

Would’ve mainly breastfed if latching issues didn’t occur

2. Where did your infant sleep at birth? Did they share the same bed (i.e., co-sleep) or room

with you? What were your reasons for this arrangement?

A combination. Early as a newborn it was more co-sleeping but then had own room to sleep in the

crib. Wanted newborn close as possible but also felt that it wasn’t the safest in terms of co-sleep ( fear of

possible death or suffocation)

3. What do you think influenced your decisions about feeding and sleeping?[For example,were

you following your gut instinct or a doctor’s advice, your sense of what other parents do,

what you have read in books, or what your own parents said or did?] Did your reasons have

anything to do with your goals for your baby’s development or the baby’s physical well-being?

Followed medical recommendations and family experience. Reasons had to do with wanting optimal

health and development given the fact that the baby wouldn't take the breast milk.

*Made the effort to follow what the doctor said but had her mom give different recommendations and

would sometimes follow those because in Latino Culture home remedies are believed to work better

than medicinal*

4. [If the interviewee has MORE than one child] Were there any differences in the feeding

and sleeping arrangements for your other children? Why or why not?

N/A

Part III. Parenting Styles & Socialization Goals

1. Keller et al. (2009) describes two parenting styles that vary across cultures: proximal

and distal. Proximal parenting consists of high amounts of body contact and body

stimulation whereas distal parenting involves lots of face-to-face contact and object

play. Some parents employ a combination of proximal and distal parenting strategies.
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How would you describe your style of interaction with your baby? Could you provide

some specific examples of when you used a proximal or distal style of parenting?

Combination of both, holding the baby was very reassuring but when things needed to get

done/ work needed to be done she would put the baby in the playpen with toys.

● Child was present when the parent was still obtaining her masters. Mother would

occasionally leave Child with grandparent. Although she can’t remember the early

stages of it, over time the child wouldn’t necessarily cry when mom left but would look

out the window as mom left. Child acknowledged that mom was leaving.

Proximal → Held baby when watching TV or not doing something that required

Distal → keep baby close in terms of distance so that baby could see her if she couldn’t get baby

to fall asleep. Would do this when completing tasks that required both hands and/or focus

2. How we parent reflects our socialization goals for our children. What were your goals

as a parent in terms of socializing your baby? [For example, were you interested in

self-expression and independence, achievement, personal responsibility AND/OR

obedience and cooperation, emotional closeness/relatedness, social responsibility, and

conformity with family values?]

Who or what do you think influenced these socialization goals and strategies?

*Latino Culture was embedded in a lot of different areas in behavior (obey, respect, follow

through and the biggest source of discipline in the family was fear) Understanding that if a bad

choice was made a negative consequence would follow. Threats made: Don’t make me take you

to the bathroom/ watch when we get home* A lot of her goals were obedience and cooperation
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because she felt, at the time, that if her baby had that everything else would follow but that

wasn’t the case. Meaning, If she knew that her baby knew what it meant to behave she would

be able to make better choices and develop better relationships with people. However, when it

came to interacting with people it was awkward for the child because she didn’t know how to

react because the child was probably waiting to be told what to do. Having a big focus on

obedience and cooperation (baby will be understand right from wrong) , took away from

child's ability to develop the skills needed to interact (hindered the ability for child to become

independent)

Note: Goals can be behavior/character goals or health/survival goals.