2

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8

Second Edition

3
Other programs in Strong Kids™: A Social & Emotional Learning Curriculum

Merrell’s Strong Start—Pre-K: A Social & Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition

Merrell’s Strong Start—Grades K–2: A Social & Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second
Edition

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 3–5: A Social & Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second
Edition

Merrell’s Strong Teens—Grades 9–12: A Social & Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second
Edition

4
5
Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8

6
A Social & Emotional Learning Curriculum
Second Edition

by

Dianna Carrizales-Engelmann, Ph.D.

University of Oregon
Eugene

Laura L. Feuerborn, Ph.D.

University of Washington, Tacoma

Barbara A. Gueldner, Ph.D.

Successful Kids Today
Steamboat Springs, Colorado

and

Oanh K. Tran, Ph.D.

California State University
Hayward

7
Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co.
Post Office Box 10624
Baltimore, Maryland 21285-0624
USA
www.brookespublishing.com
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc.
All rights reserved.
Previous edition copyright © 2007.
“Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co.” is a registered trademark of Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc.

Strong Kids™ and are trademarks of Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc.

Purchasers of Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, are granted permission to
download, print, and/or photocopy the forms for educational purposes. None of the forms may be reproduced to generate revenue for any
program or individual. Unauthorized use beyond this privilege is prosecutable under federal law. You will see the copyright protection notice at the
bottom of each photocopiable form.

The individuals described in this book are composites or real people whose situations are masked and are based on the authors’ experiences. In
all instances, names and identifying details have been changed to protect confidentiality.

Cover image © istockphoto/ranplett.

Stock photos and clip art are © istockphoto.com and Jupiterimages Corporation.

Source for Chapter 1 extract: From “Enhancing school-based prevention and youth development through coordinated social, emotional, and
academic learning,” by M.T. Greenberg, et al., American Psychologist, 2003, 58, pp. 466–474.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

The Library of Congress has cataloged the print edition as follows:

Names: Carrizales-Engelmann, Dianna, author. | Merrell, Kenneth W. Strong start.
Title: Merrell's strong kids, grades 6-8 : a social and emotional learning curriculum / Dianna Carrizales-Engelmann, Ph.D., University of
Oregon, Eugene; Laura L. Feuerborn, Ph.D., University of Washington, Tacoma; Barbara A. Gueldner, Ph.D., Successful Kids Today,
Steamboat Springs, Colorado and Oanh K. Tran, Ph.D., California State University, East Bay.
Description: Second edition. | Baltimore, Maryland : Brookes Publishing, 2016. | Series: Strong kids | Revised edition of: Strong start /
Kenneth W. Merrell. c2007. | Includes bibliographical references and index.
Identifiers: LCCN 2015038553 | ISBN 9781598579543 (paperback)
Subjects: LCSH: Affective education. | Education, Elementary. | Social learning. | Child development. | Emotional intelligence. | Education--
Social aspects.
Classification: LCC LB1072 .C366 2016 | DDC 370.15/34--dc23 LC record available at http://lccn.loc.gov/2015038553

British Library Cataloguing in Publication data are available from the British Library.
Version 1.0

8
Contents

About the Downloadable Material

About the Authors
Foreword Hill M. Walker
Acknowledgments

Section I Introduction and Overview

Chapter 1 About Strong Kids
Chapter 2 Preparing Your Lessons and Your Students
Chapter 3 Overview of the Lessons
Chapter 4 What’s New: Updates to Strong Kids and Strong Teens

Section II The Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 Curriculum

Lesson 1 About Strong Kids: Emotional Strength Training
Lesson 2 Understanding Your Emotions 1
Lesson 3 Understanding Your Emotions 2
Lesson 4 Understanding Other People’s Emotions
Lesson 5 Dealing with Anger
Lesson 6 Clear Thinking 1
Lesson 7 Clear Thinking 2
Lesson 8 Solving People Problems
Lesson 9 Letting Go of Stress
Lesson 10 Positive Living
Lesson 11 Creating Strong and SMART Goals
Lesson 12 Finishing UP!

Section III Appendices

Appendix A Strong Kids Knowledge Test for Students in Grades 6–8
Appendix B Basic Fidelity Checklist

9
About the Downloadable Material
Purchasers of this book may download, print, and/or photocopy the ancillary material for educational use.
These materials are included with the print book and are also available at
www.brookespublishing.com/downloads, keycode: 36geDaK4f

CONTENTS OF THE DOWNLOADABLE MATERIAL

Lesson 1
Supplement 1.1: The Limbic System
Supplement 1.2: Strong Kids Rules
Supplement 1.3: Comment Slip
Supplement 1.4: Strong Kids Lessons
Supplement 1.5: Key Terms and Definitions
Supplement 1.6: List of Emotions
Supplement 1.7: My Emotions

Lesson 2
Supplement 2.1: Picture of a Ferris Wheel
Supplement 2.2: Key Terms and Definitions
Supplement 2.3: Practice Scenarios
Supplement 2.4: Emotions Volume Slider
Supplement 2.5: Identifying and Measuring My Emotions

Lesson 3
Supplement 3.1: Thoughts, Emotions, and Behaviors
Supplement 3.2: Key Terms and Definitions
Supplement 3.3: Cartoon Example
Supplement 3.4: Practice Situations
Supplement 3.5: Ways of Showing Emotions

Lesson 4
Supplement 4.1: Key Terms and Definitions
Supplement 4.2: List of Emotions
Supplement 4.3: Small-Group Student Role-Play Scenarios
Supplement 4.4: Empathy Assignment

Lesson 5
Supplement 5.1: Key Terms and Definitions

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Supplement 5.2: What Problem Does My Anger Want Me to Solve?
Supplement 5.3: How Much Does This Bother You?
Supplement 5.4: What Does MY Anger Look Like?
Supplement 5.5: Anger Model
Supplement 5.6: Marcella’s Problem
Supplement 5.7: Anger Management Skills and Strategies
Supplement 5.8: Anger Management Worksheet

Lesson 6
Supplement 6.1: Picture of a Snake
Supplement 6.2: Picture of a Herpetologist
Supplement 6.3: Key Terms and Definitions
Supplement 6.4: Picture of a Thought Bubble
Supplement 6.5: Picture of a Man Trapped in a Hole
Supplement 6.6: Common Thinking Traps
Supplement 6.7: Example Situations
Supplement 6.8: Practice Situations Worksheet

Lesson 7
Supplement 7.1: Thinking Traps
Supplement 7.2: Picture of a Snowball
Supplement 7.3: Key Terms and Definitions
Supplement 7.4: Emotions Volume Slider
Supplement 7.5: Picture of Looking for Evidence
Supplement 7.6: Looking for Evidence to Reframe
Supplement 7.7: Evidence for or Against
Supplement 7.8: Reframing Thinking Traps Examples
Supplement 7.9: Reframing Thinking Traps Using Evidence
Supplement 7.10: Reframing Thinking Traps Worksheet

Lesson 8
Supplement 8.1: Pictures of Two Students Arguing
Supplement 8.2: Key Terms and Definitions
Supplement 8.3: Conflict Resolution: What Can I Do?
Supplement 8.4: A Four-Step Problem-Solving Model for Conflict Resolution
Supplement 8.5: Using a Problem-Solving Model to Resolve Conflicts

Lesson 9
Supplement 9.1: Pictures of Stressful Situations
Supplement 9.2: Key Terms and Definitions
Supplement 9.3: Stress Symptoms and Example Situations
Supplement 9.4: Personal Triggers and Stress Identification
Supplement 9.5: Relaxation Techniques
Supplement 9.6: Letting Go of Stress

Lesson 10

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Supplement 10.1: Key Terms and Definitions
Supplement 10.2: Feeling Good Activities
Supplement 10.3: Healthy Habits
Supplement 10.4: Weekday Habits and Routines
Supplement 10.5: Weekend Habits and Routines
Supplement 10.6: Example Situation: Helping Marcella Make Healthy Choices
Supplement 10.7: What Did You Do Toward Positive Living This Week?

Lesson 11
Supplement 11.1: Your Younger Self
Supplement 11.2: Key Terms and Definitions
Supplement 11.3: Healthy Living Domains
Supplement 11.4: Examples and Nonexamples of Setting Goals
Supplement 11.5: Setting SMART Goals
Supplement 11.6: Steps to Setting and Attaining Goals
Supplement 11.7: Personal Goal Organizer

Lesson 12
Supplement 12.1: Strong Kids Lesson Review and Discussion Questions
Supplement 12.2: Resilience Example Slogans
Supplement 12.3: Helping Resources Handout
Certificate of Achievement

Appendix A
Strong Kids Knowledge Test for Students in Grades 6–8

Appendix B
Basic Fidelity Checklist

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About the Authors
Dianna Carrizales-Engelmann, Ph.D., College of Education, 230Q HEDCO, 1215 University of Oregon,
Eugene, OR 97403

Dianna Carrizales-Engelmann is currently an instructor at the University of Oregon in Eugene specializing in

performance assessment for teacher preparation. Over the course of her career in the field of education, Dr.
Carrizales-Engelmann has maintained a consistent focus in the development, research, and troubleshooting of
educational assessments. Dr. Carrizales-Engelmann’s assessment development experience includes state
assessments, nationally standardized assessments, and classroom and curriculum-based assessments. In
addition to her role in the field of educational assessment, Dr. Carrizales-Engelmann has had several years of
policy-related experience in the areas of education and assessment at the Oregon Department of Education.

Laura L. Feuerborn, Ph.D., Associate Professor, Department of Education, University of Washington,

Tacoma, 1900 Commerce Street, Box 35835, Tacoma, Washington 98402

Dr. Feuerborn is Associate Professor at the University of Washington, Tacoma, and is a nationally certified
school psychologist. She received her Ph.D. in school psychology with an emphasis in emotional and
behavioral supports from the University of Oregon. Since joining the faculty at the University of Washington,
Tacoma, in 2006, she has taught graduate-level courses for educators in both general and special education.
Her areas of teaching expertise include classroom management, systems of prevention and supports, and
collaborative consultation. She developed and now leads a course that focuses on social and emotional learning
(SEL) for teachers. Dr. Feuerborn’s research centers on the science of implementing systems change. She is
an author of the Staff Perceptions of Behavior and Discipline (http://spbdsupport.com), an assessment tool
that helps leadership teams understand the needs and perceptions of school staff in the implementation of
positive behavior interventions and supports (PBIS). Dr. Feuerborn has been presenting her work in regional,
national, and international conferences for more than 15 years. She serves as a reviewer for scholarly journals
and publishes peer-reviewed research in the fields of SEL and schoolwide PBIS.

Barbara A. Gueldner, Ph.D., Licensed Psychologist, Successful Kids Today, P.O. Box 772748, Steamboat
Springs, Colorado 80477

Dr. Gueldner is a licensed psychologist and nationally certified school psychologist who works with children
and families in Steamboat Springs, Colorado. She obtained her doctorate in school psychology from the
University of Oregon and has worked in educational, medical, and community settings for 20 years. Dr.
Gueldner specializes in promoting wellness and resilience through social and emotional learning (SEL)
program development and implementation, parent education and support, integrating mental health care into
primary care and schools, and early detection and intervention with developmental, behavioral, social, and
emotional problems. She has published in the areas of SEL and general childhood mental health issues,
coauthoring journal articles, book chapters, the first editions of Strong Kids and Strong Teens, and a book on
implementing SEL in schools. Dr. Gueldner is involved in a variety of public outreach and educational
initiatives in her community.

Oanh K. Tran, Ph.D., Professor, Department of Educational Psychology, California State University, East
Bay, 25800 Carlos Bee Boulevard, Hayward, California 94542

13
Dr. Tran teaches in the Child Clinical/School Psychology (CCSP) Program at California State University,
East Bay. The CCSP program is approved by the National Association of School Psychologists (NASP). Dr.
Tran also practices as a school psychologist in the San Francisco Bay Area and consults with school districts
and mental health agencies. Dr. Tran’s direct experience includes working with diverse and at-risk populations
in public and nonpublic schools as well as residential, foster care, outpatient, and in-home settings. Her
research and professional interests include psychoeducational assessments, special education, social and
emotional learning, academic and behavioral consultation, response to intervention, positive behavior
supports, cognitive behavioral therapy, and parent training. She has presented locally and nationally and has
published articles, chapters, and prevention curricula in the area of children’s mental health. Dr. Tran
continues her research and mentoring of her graduate students in social-emotional development and learning
for students in Grades K–12.

14
Foreword
This remarkable curricular program is a fitting tribute to Ken Merrell’s legacy as one of the foremost scholar–
innovators in the realm of emotional literacy and social and emotional learning (SEL). This work, along with
its authors, are clearly reflective of the superb contributions that Ken made to our field of practice and research
inquiry in teaching our school-age students, from preschool through high school, how to manage their
emotions and attitudes in a healthier, more competent manner. I am honored to write this foreword as a
means of acknowledging the work that Ken contributed and inspired in a career that was cut short so
tragically.
Children and youth today are exposed constantly to so much toxicity in our national discourse about all
manner of societal issues, not to mention the potential abuses of pervasive social media use that so dominates
their lives. We do not provide them with competent models of interpersonal behavior nor with the tools for
evaluating and making sense of what they hear and see. Nor do we model and teach healthy strategies for
problem solving difficult social and interpersonal situations. Far too many youth today do not have the means
to access material such as that provided in the Strong KidsTM curriculum. I can think of no other current
innovation deliverable within the schooling context that holds greater importance for our youth’s future than
this one.
Mastery of the content of this curricular program has so many uses in a student’s daily life that are
manifested in one’s self-management as well as in relating to others. This content holds substantial potential
for improving student mental health and social relationships throughout one’s social network. This program
revision introduces “emotion identification” that allows students to better cope with complex and concurrent
emotions, and students are taught how to confront their emotions in a proactive manner rather than as
something to simply change or fix. Students are taught about emotional expression in contextual terms that
include not only how they are expressed but with whom and where. The scenarios provided as teaching aids
are authentic and carefully referenced to the problems and social situations today’s students are likely to
experience within their respective social networks. In terms of useful content, there seems to be very little that
the authors have overlooked. I am especially impressed with the material on selecting smart, achievable goals
and strategies for integrating SEL content across social settings and the generalizability–sustainability of key
concepts.
The new content added to this revision passes the logic test for me in that it encompasses exactly what I
think students of today need to cope effectively with the challenges and stresses of their daily life. These
include units on understanding your emotions, understanding the emotions of others, dealing with anger,
clear thinking, solving people problems, letting go of stress, positive living, behavior change, and finishing
UP. These essential competencies are embedded within five lessons focused respectively on self-awareness,
self-management, social awareness, relationship skills, and responsible decision making. Exposure to and
mastery of this material through a universal curricular teaching approach would go a long way toward
enhancing the socialization process for many of our stressed out and anxious students. I am also impressed
with the section on mindfulness and frankly did not expect such a unit in a curriculum of this type. However,
as the authors present it, this material appears to fit seamlessly with the other content.
I have long believed that best practices in the SEL domain involve use of the most effective principles of
academic instruction to teach this content. There are two types of mastery that should be addressed in this
regard: conceptual and behavioral. This curriculum addresses both types of mastery and also provides for the
universal and small group/individualized teaching of the content for those students who struggle with mastery
in a group context. I applaud the authors for their accommodation of this important task in their work.

15
 Over 20 years of research and development have been invested in this program to date. It is also
grounded in a strong practitioner feedback loop that has provided invaluable information on the best ways to
teach this content in a user-friendly fashion that students find appealing and acceptable. More than anything I
can think of, the Strong Kids curriculum holds the potential to realize schools’ role in promoting the emotional
literacy and mental health of today’s students. The Strong Kids curriculum program is very well designed,
meets the best standards of curricular development, is easy to teach, and—best of all—students seem to like it,
which, in my view, is the ultimate test of such a product. The Strong Kids curriculum is indeed a seminal
contribution to our knowledge and practice base on social-emotional development. We owe Ken Merrell and
the authors a huge debt!

Hill M. Walker, Ph.D.

Professor Emeritus
College of Education
University of Oregon

16
Acknowledgments
This second edition of Strong Kids and Strong Teens is published in memory of and dedication to Dr. Kenneth
W. Merrell: teacher, mentor, friend, advisor, and inspiration (1957–2011). These programs would not exist
without his vision and commitment to the mission of the Oregon Resiliency Project. Through these revised
programs, we aim to honor and extend his legacy of supports for children, adolescents, and school
communities. He was on our minds and in our hearts at every step of this process.
We continue to acknowledge the foundational research, development, and support of the Oregon
Resiliency Project members (2001–2011): Leah Benazzi, Sara Castro-Olivo, Erin Chaparro, Christine Davis,
Keith Herman, Duane Isava, Travis Laxton, Verity Levitt, Kelly McGraw, Kent McIntosh, Jean Mercier,
Nicole Nakayama, Christiane Oilar, Kristin Orton, Wendy Reinke, Scott Ross, and Lisa Sterling.

17
SECTION I

18
Introduction and Overview

19
CHAPTER 1

20
 About Strong Kids

Strong Kids™: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum is a social and emotional learning curriculum that
consists of five brief and practical social and emotional learning (SEL) programs designed for the purpose of
teaching social and emotional skills and assets that promote resilience and mitigate risk in children and
adolescents. These introductory chapters provide information on the following:
• The importance of promoting children’s mental health and doing so in the context of SEL
• The design of the Strong Kids program
• Evidence of the program’s effectiveness
• Tips for using the curriculum effectively and with confidence
• Updates to the second edition.
Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 is designed specifically for use with children in Grades 6–8, or those who are
approximately ages 11–14 years. Because Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 is designed to be both a prevention and an
early intervention (EI) program, it has a wide range of applications and may be used effectively with children
who are high functioning, typically developing, at risk for social and emotional problems, or struggling with
social and emotional difficulties. Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 can be implemented in a variety of settings: general
and special education classrooms, group counseling settings, and youth treatment facilities that have an
educational component.
For younger students in the early elementary grades, the Strong Kids curriculum also offers Strong Start—
Pre-K, Strong Start—Grades K–2, and Strong Kids—Grades 3–5. For older students in higher grades, the
curriculum also offers Strong Teens—Grades 9–12 for use with high school–age students.
Youth in the Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 age range experience a host of changes during this time in
development. Bodies are changing, the complexities of social relationships extend to romantic feelings,
friendships may be tenuous at times, navigating relationships through social media becomes increasingly
complex, emotional experiences seem more intense, and youth may more openly question parents’ and other
adults’ values and voice their opinions—sometimes in an irritable tone. Youth often become increasingly
aware of differences between themselves and the idealized models portrayed in the media. They may also
experience difficulties with adjustment and a loss of self-concept in some areas. Beginning at about age 13,
rates of depression begin to increase and gender differences begin to become particularly pronounced, with
girls reporting depression at a higher rate than boys.
In the middle grades, students also are expected to be more independent with schoolwork and managing
themselves in general. Pressures to be organized and responsible for planning ahead and making deadlines,
and juggling a more complex extracurricular schedule, can feel overwhelming. Many young people also live in
communities or families in which they are exposed to ineffective or inappropriate models for solving conflict
and dealing with problems.
Stress increases with these demands, and youth need to cope effectively. Strong Kids—6–8 is designed to
increase their awareness of these issues and offer strategies to manage emotional and social complexities while
having fun and engaging in activities that support their academic, social, and emotional learning.

21
22
PROMOTING CHILDREN’S MENTAL HEALTH
As many researchers, writers, and public officials have noted, changes in the structure of society and families
have resulted in an increasing percentage of children and families who are at risk for developing a variety of
behavioral, social, and mental health problems (e.g., Costello & Angold, 2000; Doll & Lyon, 1998; Farmer &
Farmer, 1999; Hoagwood & Erwin, 1997; Satcher, 1999). The numbers of children and youth affected by
these problems are surprisingly high. Greenberg, Domitrovich, and Bumbarger (2001) asserted that between
12% and 22% of children and adolescents younger than age 18 experience mental health problems of sufficient
severity to be in need of mental health services. These percentages represent a staggering figure of up to 1 out
of every 5 children and adolescents in some instances. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (2013)
estimated that among adolescents within a 12-month period, 8% will attempt suicide and 20% of students
have been bullied, and during a 30-day period, 41.4% texted or e-mailed while driving a car and 34.9%
consumed alcohol. Without question, effective early responses to these problems, including mental health
prevention and EI curricula in educational settings, must occur if these challenges are to be stemmed.
Despite sincere and well-meaning attempts to offer real solutions to social, emotional, and mental health
problems of students in school settings, many of the programs or interventions that have been implemented
are simply ineffective. Walker stated that “educators are notorious for embracing programs that look good but
do no actual good” (2001, p. 2). In these educators’ defense, we should note that school personnel who work
on the front lines of serving children and youth who have significant mental health issues are often
overworked and not provided with sufficient resources with which to make the impact they desire.
Furthermore, some developers and publishers of mental health prevention programs tend to overwhelm
educators and clinicians with claims of effectiveness, even when there is little or no supporting evidence.
Worse yet are reactionary school policies, such as the perennial “get tough” approaches that are not only
ineffective in the long term but also contribute to the development of systems that are hostile, aversive,
socially toxic, and incompatible with optimal development of academic skills and mental health (Hyman &
Perone, 1998; Skiba & Peterson, 1999).
Despite these problems and challenges, there is reason for optimism regarding our ability to positively
affect the social and emotional health and resilience of children and adolescents, even those from very adverse
life circumstances. One reason for this optimism is the accumulation of a large body of scientific evidence
regarding what has been termed developmental resilience (Doll & Lyon, 1998). This notion of resilience
concerns the ability of individuals to cope successfully with adversity, risk factors, and severe life stress and for
young people to develop into competent and happy adults despite these problems.
Central to this notion of developmental resilience is the idea that some characteristics of resilience—the
cognitive, behavioral, and affective skills that enable one to cope effectively with adversity—may be
systematically taught and learned. Although some aspects of resilience or developmental hardiness may be
innate or biologically based, the evidence shows that learning plays a crucial role in developing the ability to
cope effectively with problems and challenges. Stated simply, the ability to be resilient and to cope effectively
in the face of adverse circumstances and challenges in life is something that can be acquired in great measure
through systematic and effective instruction in the critical requisite skills involved.
Although the primary mission of public education has traditionally been perceived as promoting the
development of academic skills, there is growing support and advocacy for the systematic inclusion of skills
that may be considered “nonacademic” but are, in fact, key to supporting students’ overall development
(Pellegrino & Hilton, 2013). Critical thinking, problem solving, creativity, communication, and responsible
thinking are necessary for students to succeed in the 21st century (Partnership for 21st Century Skills, 2008),
and a growing body of evidence demonstrates that social and emotional skills are particularly relevant (see
Durlak, Dymnicki, Taylor, Weissberg, & Schellinger, 2011, for a meta-analytic review) and believed to be a
“missing piece” (Elias, 2006, p. 6). There is no question that most educators, parents, students, and the
general public also support and expect a broader mission for schools (Greenberg et al., 2003). Some examples
of this expanded agenda include character education, development of good work habits, promotion of good

23
citizenship, development of social and emotional competence, and promotion of a healthy and productive
lifestyle. Commenting on the need for this broader agenda, Greenberg and his colleagues stated
High-quality education should teach young people to interact in socially skilled and respectful ways; to practice positive, safe, and
healthy behaviors; to contribute ethically and responsibly to their peer group, family, school, and community; and to possess basic
competencies, work habits, and values as a foundation for meaningful employment and. … We consequently assert that school-based
prevention programming—based on coordinated social, emotional, and academic learning—should be fundamental to preschool
through high school education. (2003, pp. 466–467)

We emphatically agree with this statement. In addition, we propose that teaching young people positive
social, emotional, and behavioral skills is not only an essential mission for educators and mental health
professionals but also one of the most critical challenges facing our society in the 21st century. Students are
placed under so many stressors at times during their young development that teaching resilience is critical for
academic and life success.

24
SOCIAL AND EMOTIONAL LEARNING
A framework, aptly named social and emotional learning, has guided efforts to effectively teach the social and
emotional health and resilience of young people. Drawing from the fields of child and adolescent
development, health promotion, principles of instruction, affective neuroscience, positive psychology,
cognitive therapy, behavioral theory and application, and prevention science (Zins, Bloodworth, Weissberg, &
Walberg, 2004), specific skills are ideally taught over the course of students’ academic tenure (i.e., preschool
through high school). These skills also should be taught with coordination and strategy in mind (Devaney,
O’Brien, Resnik, Keister, & Weissberg, 2006; Greenberg et al., 2003). That is, how will the skills be infused
throughout a busy school day? How will we know students are learning and applying the information? What
kind of support is needed and is this support feasible? The goal is to provide all students with effective
instruction and support to mitigate risk behaviors and outcomes and enhance protective factors known to
affect positive overall development (Greenberg et al., 2003). Achieving this goal is possible by applying
current evidence and continuing to investigate ways in which we can improve.
The efforts of the Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning (CASEL) at supporting
SEL in youth have been instrumental in understanding the key areas for social and emotional development
and best practices in facilitating this process. CASEL has endorsed five person-centered and interrelated
competency areas that are essential to cognitive, social, and emotional development: self-awareness, self-
management, social awareness, relationship skills, and responsible decision making (CASEL, 2014; Zins et
al., 2004). There is growing evidence that SEL programming, highlighting these competency areas, is
effective (e.g., Durlak et al., 2011; Durlak & Wells, 1997; Payton et al., 2008; Sklad, Diekstra, De Ritter,
Ben, & Gravesteijn, 2012). Improvements have been measured in areas such as identifying emotions,
resolving conflict, self-efficacy, attitudes toward school, positive social behaviors, and academic performance.
Conduct problems, as well as emotional distress, have been reduced. In addition to benefits for youth, teachers
view SEL to be a priority (Bridgeland, Bruce, & Hariharan, 2013), and school staff are able to implement
SEL effectively and without mental health training (Durlak et al., 2011).
Since the early 1990s, many SEL programs have been developed and used in educational and mental
health settings. The type of program ultimately selected will depend on a variety of factors such as the needs
of the setting, financial considerations, training and resource requirements, and time constraints. Strong Kids
was designed with these variables in mind and, we believe, offers an affordable and relatively low-resource
option, using principles of effective instruction and evidence-based strategies for promoting mental health, to
effectively teach SEL skills.

25
MODEL FOR PREVENTING BEHAVIORAL AND EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS
Education researchers have adapted a public health prevention model for use in school systems (e.g., Merrell
& Buchanan, 2006; U.S. Department of Education, 2004; Walker et al., 1996). We believe that this three-
tiered model (see Figure 1.1) has great importance for promoting SEL and for school-based promotion of
children’s mental health in general. Sometimes referred to as the “triangle,” this model of prevention and
intervention includes service delivery at three levels of prevention: students who currently are not experiencing
learning or social/behavior difficulties (primary prevention); students who are considered to be at risk for the
development of learning or social/behavior difficulties (secondary prevention); and students who currently are
experiencing significant learning or social/behavior difficulties (tertiary prevention).

Figure 1.1. The prevention triangle model, specifically adapted for how to make systems work for assessing, identifying, and
serving students with behavioral, social, and emotional problems. (Key: IEP, individualized education program.)

We can visualize this model and its three levels of prevention as a triangle. The entire triangle represents
all students within a school setting, the majority of whom are not experiencing difficulties (i.e., the bottom
portion of the triangle), some of whom are at risk of developing significant problems (i.e., the middle
portion), and an even smaller percentage who are currently experiencing significant difficulties (i.e., the top
portion). Typical practice is to focus on those students who are at the top of the triangle—those who are
currently experiencing significant learning or social-emotional difficulties. Practitioners tend to spend the
majority of their time and effort providing tertiary prevention (i.e., individualized assessment and intervention
services) to these students on a case-by-case basis. These students make up the smallest percentage of the
school population, but because of the significance of their problems, they often require the majority of time
and resources from school personnel (Walker et al., 1996). Figure 1.1 illustrates the prevention triangle model,
specifically adapted for how to make systems work for assessing, identifying, and serving students with
behavioral, social, and emotional problems.
Shifting to a systemwide prevention model requires looking at the “big picture” by considering the needs
of all students, not just those who are referred because they are currently experiencing significant difficulties.

26
The foundation of a prevention approach is the use of universal interventions (i.e., primary prevention)
designed to enhance the delivery of effective instruction and improved school climate to promote the
academic, social, and behavioral resilience of all students in the school. This idea requires that educators begin
to move some resources and energy toward those children and adolescents who are not currently experiencing
significant difficulties in order to promote skills to provide a sort of inoculation for the developmental
challenges that may occur. The premise is to reduce the probability that these youth will eventually rise to the
“top of the triangle” where more resources are required. More specifically, primary prevention for students
who are not currently experiencing learning or social/behavior difficulties is accomplished through schoolwide
and classwide efforts that involve the consistent use of research-based effective practices, ongoing monitoring
of these practices and student outcomes, staff training, and professional development. The goal of primary
prevention is to create school and classroom environments that promote student learning and health and
decrease the number of students at risk for learning or social/behavior problems.
As important as it is to focus on primary prevention, we also know that not all students respond similarly
to these efforts. Thus, it is important to monitor student progress and to assess whether students are at risk
(i.e., in need of secondary prevention efforts) or are experiencing significant difficulties (i.e., in need of tertiary
prevention efforts). Identifying students at risk for learning, social-emotional, and behavior difficulties is an
important aspect to comprehensive prevention efforts. For students identified as at risk and in need of
secondary prevention efforts, the focus is on the delivery of specialized interventions (often at a small-group
level) to prevent the worsening of problems and to prevent the development of more significant concerns. The
focus on early identification and EI is important.
With respect to mental health and social-emotional problems of children and adolescents, we believe that
this prevention model is an ideal way to think about providing SEL programs and other services. Thinking in
this way about the challenges faced in promoting social-emotional wellness and mental health among children
and adolescents makes these challenges more manageable. Instead of waiting until students have developed
severe problems and require extensive time and effort to simply be managed, you can continually focus a
portion of your resources on prevention activities that will ultimately reduce the number of students at the
“top of the triangle.”

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DESIGN OF THE STRONG KIDS CURRICULUM: BACKGROUND
The Strong Kids curriculum was developed by the Oregon Resiliency Project (ORP) at the University of
Oregon and under the direction of the late Kenneth W. Merrell, Ph.D. Several goals led the research and
development efforts to
1. Target each of the five pathways to wellness advocated by Cowen (1994), a pioneer in the modern science
of mental health and wellness promotion:
• Forming wholesome early attachments
• Acquiring age-appropriate competencies
• Having exposure to settings that favor wellness outcomes
• Having the empowering sense of being in control of one’s fate
• Coping effectively with stress
2. Make available a program that was prevention oriented, practical, costeffective, and feasible for teachers to
implement in the classroom and within the course of a typical class period
3. Design the program to be useful across grade levels, thereby providing a means to provide a more cohesive
and collaborative approach to SEL programming (Zins, 2004).
As we revised this curriculum, we envisioned Strong Kids as a carefully designed SEL program to prevent the
development of certain mental health problems and promote social and emotional wellness among young
people (see Chapter 4 for more information on the revisions). Strong Kids is not the right SEL program for all
types of problems. We especially targeted the domain of internalizing behavioral and emotional problems
(e.g., depression, anxiety, social withdrawal, somatic problems), using a largely cognitive-behavioral
theoretical orientation given its evidence of effectiveness with youth in these areas (Weisz, Hawley, & Doss,
2004), to promote social and emotional resilience. Strong Kids should not be considered a comprehensive
program for preventing school violence or antisocial behavior, even though it may play a role in supporting
these aims as part of a comprehensive program of effective behavior support.
The advantage of this programming approach is that Strong Kids follows the recommendations outlined
by Durlak and DuPre (2008) for skill training by being sequenced, active, focused, and explicit. One
disadvantage of this approach is that the program is not designed to be a complete mental health treatment
package for children and youth with severe mental health problems. Although our research to date has shown
that the curriculum can make a meaningful difference with these populations, it should be used as one
component of a comprehensive, intensive intervention program in such cases.

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IMPLEMENTATION GUIDELINES AND LESSON STRUCTURE
The Strong Kids and Strong Teens programs were designed to circumvent common barriers to implementation
such as time, resources, and training while upholding criteria for effective instructional design and delivery
(Carnine, Silbert, Kame’enui, & Tarver, 2009; Coyne, Kame’enui, & Carnine, 2006). Thus, this curriculum
was developed with both time feasibility and ease of implementation as high priorities. Even an exceptionally
strong intervention program will fail to make an impact if its time requirements and difficulty of
implementation result in few people being able to use it within the time and training constraints of a school
system or other youth-serving agency. We recommend teaching the Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 lessons once per
week for 12 weeks, although there is evidence to support implementation at a more accelerated tempo such as
two lessons per week for 6 weeks with similar effective outcomes (Tran, 2008). The one lesson per week
format may allow students sufficient time to complete any homework that may be assigned, internalize the
concepts taught, and practice the new skills they learn, both at school and outside of school.
Each lesson takes between 60 and 80 minutes to complete. All lessons can be shortened by stopping at
the end of an activity and finishing up with the Closure activity found at the end of the lesson. When
continuing the lesson, teachers simply resume by starting with the Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity
found in the Introduction section, followed by the point in the lesson where the lesson was stopped during the
previous instructional period and again ending with the Closure activity. For each lesson, we have suggested a
stopping point. Please refer to the Running Short on Time? section, found at the beginning of each lesson, for
these suggestions. Lessons also can be lengthened, using additional activities found at the end of each lesson,
at the instructor’s discretion.
Each lesson includes instructional scaffolding (e.g., optional scripting and explicit directions) to eliminate
the need for intensive preparation, a review and introduction of the lesson and key concepts, a range of
examples to define the concept, and opportunities to practice and integrate skills through activities such as
modeling, guided practice and role play, and independent practice. Generalization and maintenance of skills
are promoted by providing strategies for practice throughout the school day, in other academic areas, and
across settings.
We specifically designed Strong Kids as a low-cost, low-technology program that can be implemented in
a school or related educational setting with minimal professional training and resources. It is not necessary to
be a licensed mental health professional to learn and implement this curriculum. General and special
education teachers, speech-language pathologists, school counselors, social workers, psychologists, and other
education or mental health professionals may serve as effective group leaders. The program may be taught in a
general education classroom or in selected small-group settings. One of the advantages of the Strong Kids
curriculum is that it is designed to support academic skills and to be integrated within an instructional
program. The activities in this curriculum not only promote SEL and resilience but also support literacy,
language arts, social studies, and health.
Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 is highly structured and semiscripted, designed to cover very specific objectives
and goals. We developed the objectives and goals for each lesson, as well as the implementation guidelines,
based on current research findings in education and psychology, aiming for a prevention and intervention
program that is built on a solid base of empirical evidence. Each lesson follows a similar format with the
following sections:
Social and Emotional Competency Areas: CASEL (2014) endorsed five key areas necessary in building SEL
skills (self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, relationship skills, and responsible decision
making); skills categories are assigned to each lesson where content reflects these areas.
Purpose and Objectives: Describes the skills students will learn
Materials Needed: Lists the materials needed for advance preparation
Running Short on Time?: Suggests an optional stopping point to segment the lesson

29
Instructor Reflection: Provides an opportunity for instructors to reflect on the content of the lesson to increase
knowledge and personalize the application
Review: Lists topics covered in the previous lesson
Introduction: Introduces the concepts for the lesson
Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity: Helps students focus and prepare for the lesson
Key Terms and Definitions: Provides an introduction to any relevant vocabulary
Instructional Content and Practice Activities: Provides content and activities specialized to each lesson’s
theme
Putting It All Together: Reviews the key concepts practiced in the lesson
Closure: Provides a brief breathing and reflection activity
In addition, each lesson provides optional scripts to aid content delivery, sample situations and examples to
better illustrate the content, and opportunities for guided and independent practice. Group leaders can follow
the script and examples directly or modify the sample script to present the lesson’s main ideas using language
that is most appropriate for their group(s). At the end of each of the 12 lessons is a section titled Tips for
Transfer Training and Homework. This section includes optional homework assignments and take-home
handouts, tactics that are further designed to reinforce learning outside of the Strong Kids—Grades 6–8
instructional setting. This section also prompts instructors to precorrect (i.e., anticipate students’ errors and
difficulties in learning the skills), remind (i.e., provide verbal or visual prompts of the steps and actions needed
to use the skills), and reinforce (i.e., provide social reinforcement, such as praise, when students use the skills)
the lesson objectives. These instructional principles are known to improve skills maintenance over time and
generalization across settings (e.g., Langland, Lewis-Palmer, & Sugai, 1998; Sugai, Bullis, & Cumblad,
1997). Ideas for making the content especially relevant to students are included in each lesson, typically within
each practice activity. Additional suggestions for activities are listed at the end of each lesson and are provided
to encourage practice that is embedded throughout the course of the school day, to make the lesson content
relevant to students, and to allow additional opportunities to practice and reinforce the concepts. Lesson 12
can be used as a “booster lesson” to provide an opportunity to reteach and reemphasize critical Strong Kids
content and skills after a period of time—usually several weeks to a few months—and following the
completion of the 12 lessons.

30
EVIDENCE
The Strong Kids curriculum, from Strong Start—Pre-K to Strong Teens, has been evaluated and continues to be
studied within a multitiered model (universal and tertiary prevention and intervention programming), across
age and grade levels (elementary through high school–age individuals), and in a variety of settings. The
strongest evidence exists for a unilateral increase in knowledge of social and emotional content across studies.
Some studies also have found significant decreases in internalizing problem symptoms and increases in social
and emotional skills and assets. Teachers and students have found the program worthwhile and feasible,
thereby providing evidence for the social validity of the program. A reference section at the end of this chapter
provides relevant sources for these studies. If you are conducting research or a program evaluation of the
Strong Kids curriculum, we would be very interested in hearing from you.

31
SUMMARY
We are at a pivotal point in history whereby our youths’ social and emotional resilience is developing through
direct instruction and application, with the use of materials developed from years of research and practice
across multiple relevant disciplines. The Strong Kids curriculum offers one way of helping our youth develop
into socially and emotionally healthy individuals. Together, we can prepare today and tomorrow’s global
citizens for 21st century stressors and opportunities.

32
Strong Start, Strong Kids, and Strong Teens: Research
Barker, E.S., Marcotte, A.M., & Whitcomb, S.A. (2015). Promoting positive teacher–child interactions through implementation of a social
emotional learning curriculum with performance feedback. Manuscript in revision.
Berry-Krazmien, C., & Torres-Fernandez, I. (2007, March 27–31). Implementation of the Strong Kids curriculum in a residential facility. Poster
presentation at the Annual Convention of the National Association of School Psychologists, New York, NY.
Caldarella, P., Christensen, L., Kramer, T.J., & Kronmiller, K. (2009). Promoting social and emotional learning in second grade students: A
study of the Strong Start curriculum. Early Childhood Education Journal, 37, 51–56. doi:10.1007/s10643–009-0321-4
Castro-Olivo, S. (2014). Promoting social-emotional learning in adolescent Latino ELLs: A study of the culturally adapted Strong Teens
program. School Psychology Quarterly, 29, 567–577.
Faust, J.J. (2006). Preventing anxiety and depression: An evaluation of social-emotional curriculum (Unpublished educational specialist’s thesis).
University of Wisconsin, Whitewater.
Feuerborn, L.L. (2004). Promoting emotional resiliency through classroom instruction: The effects of a classroom-based prevention program
(Unpublished doctoral dissertation). University of Oregon, Eugene.
Gueldner, B.A., & Merrell, K.W. (2011). The effectiveness of a social and emotional learning program with middle school students in the
general education setting and the effect of consultation on student outcomes. Journal of Educational and Psychological Consultation, 21, 1–27.
doi:10.1080/10474412.2010.522876
Gunter, L., Caldarella, P., Korth, B. B., & Young, K. R. (2012). Promoting social and emotional learning in preschool students: A study of
Strong Start Pre-K. Early Childhood Education, 40, 151–159.
Harlacher, J.E., & Merrell, K.W. (2009). Social and emotional learning as a universal level of support: Evaluating the follow-up effect of Strong
Kids on social and emotional outcomes. Journal of Applied School Psychology, 26(3), 212–229. doi:10.1080/15377903.2010.495903
Isava, D.M. (2006). An investigation of the impact of a social emotional learning curriculum on problem symptoms and knowledge gains among
adolescents in a residential treatment center (Unpublished doctoral dissertation). University of Oregon, Eugene.
Kramer, T.J., Caldarella, P., Christensen, L., & Shatzer, R.H. (2010). Social and emotional learning in the kindergarten classroom: Evaluation
of the Strong Start curriculum. Early Childhood Education Journal, 37, 303–309. doi:10.1007/s10643-009-0354-8
Kramer, T.J., Caldarella, P., Young, R., Fischer, L., & Warren, J.S. (2014). Implementing Strong Kids school-wide to reduce internalizing
behaviors and increase prosocial behaviors. Education and Treatment of Children, 37, 659–680.
Levitt, V. (2009). Promoting social-emotional competency through quality teaching practices: The impact of consultation on a multidimensional treatment
integrity model of the Strong Kids Program (Unpublished doctoral dissertation). University of Oregon, Eugene.
Marchant, M., Brown, M., Caldarella, P., & Young, E. (2010). Effects of Strong Kids curriculum on students at risk for internalizing disorders:
A pilot study. Journal of Empirically Based Practices in Schools, 11(2), 123–143.
Merrell, K.W., Juskelis, M.P., Tran, O.K., & Buchanan, R. (2008). Social and emotional learning in the classroom: Impact of Strong Kids and
Strong Teens on students’ socialemotional knowledge and symptoms. Journal of Applied School Psychology, 24, 209–224.
doi:10.1080/15377900802089981
Meyer, K.M. (2014). Program evaluation of the Strong Start curriculum as a selected intervention for early elementary students (Unpublished doctoral
dissertation). University of Massachusetts, Amherst.
Nakayama, N.J. (2008). An investigation of the impact of the Strong Kids curriculum on social-emotional knowledge and symptoms of elementary aged
students in a selfcontained special education setting (Unpublished doctoral dissertation). University of Oregon, Eugene.
Sicotte, J.L. (2013). Effects of Strong Start curriculum on internalizing, externalizing behaviors, and emotion knowledge among kindergarten and first
grade students (Unpublished doctoral dissertation). University of Massachusetts, Amherst.
Tran, O.K. (2008). Promoting social and emotional learning in schools: An investigation of massed versus distributed practice schedules and social
validity of the Strong Kids curriculum in late elementary aged students (Unpublished doctoral dissertation). University of Oregon, Eugene.
Whitcomb, S.A., & Merrell, K.W. (2012). Understanding implementation and effectiveness of Strong Start K–2 on social-emotional behavior.
Early Childhood Education Journal, 40, 63–71. doi:10.1007/s10643-011-0490-9
White, N.J., & Rayle, A.D. (2007). Strong Teens: A school-based small group experience for African American males. The Journal for Specialists
in Group Work, 32, 178–189. doi:10.1080/01933920701227224

33
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CHAPTER 2

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 Preparing Your Lessons and Your Students

To implement Strong Kids—Grades 6–8, you should have access to a projector, a copy machine, chart paper,
chalk, color markers, or a marker board and a means of showing occasional Internet videos or images when
the lesson requires. Many of the lessons also include reproducible templates for in-class handouts or
worksheets for students, also available for download (refer to About the Downloadable Material for download
information). Materials are made easily accessible via download, so you can project lesson supplements,
handouts, and other images from a laptop or desktop computer or share the hard copy material directly.
However, if a computer with an accompanying projector is not available for implementation, you can choose
another option available at your site where materials can be projected or shown on the board (e.g., overhead
projector) for the lesson materials. Although it is not essential to project the images or other materials, we
have found that doing so provides the advantage of being able to go over a graphic illustration or chart in front
of the class while you introduce the critical concepts that are connected to them. Alternatively, some teachers
and group leaders have found that they prefer to make paper copies of the supplements and provide each
student with a copy of these materials rather than presenting the materials with a projector.

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SUPPLEMENTARY MATERIALS

Each Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 lesson includes supplementary materials needed for each lesson. The
supplementary materials can be found at the end of the lesson and are available for download. These materials
are labeled throughout the text with a “reminder” symbol (a finger with a string tied to it) in the margin. For
the sake of consistency, we refer to these materials as “supplements” and have titled them that way. These
supplements are available as online downloads for use as in-class handouts, worksheets, and homework
handouts. Each supplement is labeled with its intended use and indicates whether it should be used as a
handout for students, as a visual aid for you to display as you discuss a section, or both. Prior to teaching the
lesson, review the Materials Needed section at the beginning of each lesson and make copies of downloads or
handouts before lesson implementation as needed. These supplements are all reproducible for users of the
curriculum. Although we have made suggestions regarding how to use the supplementary materials, you
should feel free to adapt them to your own needs and situation. In addition, some lessons require the use of
online videos or images to help illustrate the content. When a video or image is recommended, a description is
provided to help in locating these videos or images online. More supplemental materials and resources can be
found by visiting our companion web site: www.strongkidsresources.com.

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PROVIDING AN AGENDA
During the course of teaching Strong Kids—Grades 6–8, we recommend that you make use of a visual schedule
to provide students with some predictability regarding the lesson for the day. It may be helpful to outline the
lesson agenda briefly in a bulleted list or flow chart format before the class begins in order to establish a visual
reference that you can refer to with your students. In this case, an outline of the topics included in the
curriculum may be useful as well as an agenda for each individual lesson.

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STATING EXPECTED BEHAVIORS
Because of the nature of the lessons in Strong Kids—Grades 6–8, behavior expectations for students or group
members must be very clear and discussed at the very start of Strong Kids. Some of the units revolve around
sensitive issues, and every opportunity should be taken to provide instruction and subsequent reinforcement
for appropriate behavior. Students should feel free to share their beliefs and feelings on the targeted topics but
must not feel pressured into revealing anything that makes them feel uncomfortable or makes others in the
group feel uncomfortable. You should state expected behaviors before instruction, before modeling examples,
and before the practice sections of lessons. In some cases, you may need to teach and reinforce behavioral
expectations more frequently than these suggested times, or you may remind students before each lesson.
As a general recommendation for promoting appropriate behavior in school and related settings, we
recommend that teachers and group leaders develop and teach a few simple rules for appropriate behavior.
There are three guidelines in Lesson 1 that you may use as examples. When making rules, be sure to state
expectations clearly and positively. For example, if it is necessary to make a rule around fighting, instead of
saying “no fighting,” we might say “respect your classmates, which means being friendly, keeping hands to
self, looking for nice things to say, and no arguing or fighting.” Rules should be simple and appropriate to the
developmental level of the children for whom they are intended. In addition, the list of rules should be kept to
a minimum. Usually, no more than five general rules are needed. You will find that rules are more effective
when you teach them to students and then find frequent opportunities to reinforce them through reminders,
examples, and so forth. In addition, the literature suggests giving positive praise to any negative statement in a
five-to-one ratio (Fredrickson & Losada, 2005). This way, students feel more supported and encouraged to
engage in the prosocial behaviors. You also may want to post these rules in your classroom as a reminder for
students and to offer opportunities for practice.

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PLANNING FOR SMOOTH TRANSITIONS
Time is one of the most precious commodities in your classroom or center. In a brief curriculum such as
Strong Kids—Grades 6–8, the element of time is especially critical. To make the best use of your limited time
in teaching the curriculum, use your transition time wisely before and during the lessons. We recommend that
you have all materials prepared and organized for easy distribution to students. Make sure that equipment is in
working order before you start the lessons. Explicitly state directions before and during transitions. If possible,
precorrect for any possible behavioral difficulties. If, due to student discussion or other scheduling restraints,
you find you need to end the lesson before it is complete, we recommend completing at a natural transition
such as the end of an activity and then concluding the lesson with the Closure activity.

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PHYSICAL ARRANGEMENTS
For the lessons in this curriculum, all students must have a clear view of you, the group leader. It is
recommended that students are situated in forward-facing seats or a horseshoe shape. You may want to
preassign students to groups of two or three because some activities in certain lessons will require small-group
discussion or a mini-project. This practice not only will save time but also will give you control of how your
students are grouped. Always use movement around the classroom and around the student groups, voice level,
and voice intonation to increase the interest of your students and, consequently, increase active participation.

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ADAPTATIONS FOR UNIQUE NEEDS AND DISABILITIES
In many of the lessons, you will be encouraged to create scenarios pertaining to a certain topic. To facilitate
and encourage student participation, think of situations that would best reflect the interests, abilities, and level
of understanding of the students in your class or group. You may choose to use current situations relevant to
your classroom and school or global current events to illustrate the concepts. The situations provided in the
units are to be considered examples and can be modified extensively to best fit the unique needs of your
students. Making appropriate adaptations for the needs of your students not only will make the delivery of
lessons go more smoothly but also will aid with generalization and maintenance of new skills. Before starting
the program, it is important to consider if there are behavioral needs in your group, learning difficulties, or
developmental disabilities so you can prepare for any adaptations or modifications. Also, many of the
Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activities include engaging the senses, such as touch and hearing. If students
use wheelchairs or have sensory impairments, these activities will need to be adapted according to their needs.
For low-functioning groups, adapt lessons by creating simpler examples and by breaking the lessons into
shorter sessions. For high-functioning groups, introduce complexity in the form of concurrent emotions and
involved situations. For mixed groups, be sure to provide opportunities for questions, and allow peer
interaction when appropriate so that students with a stronger grasp of the emotions can stay engaged by
participating in explanations and/or skits for students who need extra support. The following are suggested
modifications and adaptations:
• Work with fewer items per page or line and/or materials in a larger print size.
• Have a designated reader or group leader.
• Use a larger desk for group work, if available.
• Set up a buddy system to identify students who may be higher functioning.
• If assistive technology is used, identify key words/concepts to be programmed into the device.
• Use various and combinations of sensory modalities.
In the second edition of Strong Kids—6–8, an Instructor Reflection section is included to encourage the
group leader to consider the lesson topic from a personal perspective. Use this opportunity for reflection to
come up with appropriate examples from your own experiences and/or to generate empathy for how your
students may experience the subject matter.

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ADAPTATIONS FOR CULTURALLY AND LINGUISTICALLY DIVERSE
LEARNERS
As our society becomes increasingly diverse, researchers and practitioners are recognizing the need to address
cultural issues in curriculum development and implementation. Efforts to address cultural issues have ranged
from ignoring or dismissing the need for cultural adaptations to arguing the need for culture-specific research
and curricula tailored for each cultural subgroup. Between these two extreme positions has emerged a set of
criteria and recommendations for making cultural adaptations to existing curricula. The cultural adaptation
approach retains the core assumptions and skill domains of the existing curriculum but recommends tailoring
the teaching of these concepts to the specific needs of particular groups of interest. Research supports the
success of making cultural adaptations to existing social and emotional curricula for specific groups (see
Castro-Olivo, 2014; Muñoz et al., 2002; Yu & Seligman, 2002).
We began the development of Strong Kids with the assumption that no single curriculum could meet the
learning needs of all students. By focusing on teaching a set of key ideas related to SEL and resilience,
however, we believe that the curriculum can successfully meet the needs of a wide range of students when
appropriate adaptations are made. Some particular cultural variables that may require attention in curriculum
adaptation processes include language, race/ethnicity, acculturation, socioeconomic status, sexual orientation,
religion, gender, disability status, and nationality.

44
GENERALIZATION AND MAINTENANCE OF SKILLS
Instructors often find it difficult to help students generalize social and emotional skills to different settings
and to ensure that these skills are maintained over time. To increase sustainability and generalizability of skills
learned in the Strong Kids and Strong Teens programs, look for opportunities to use the Tips for Transfer
Training and Homework and the supplemental activities that are found at the end of each lesson. We have
included prompts for precorrecting errors in learning the expected skills, reminding students of the concepts
being learned, and reinforcing students for demonstrating the skills that have been introduced and taught in
the program. Reinforce Strong Kids and Strong Teens skills both within and outside the teaching setting as
much as possible. Make sure that parents, teachers, administrators, and other staff are aware of the skills you
are instructing, because your students will require frequent feedback in several settings in order for the skills to
be durable and generalized. After the program has been completed, Lesson 12, Finishing UP!, can be adapted
and used as a “booster lesson” to reteach and reinforce the major objectives from all the lessons. Also, specific
lessons may be chosen to target skills in need of reteaching. For example, after completing the Strong Kids or
Strong Teens program, if you notice that your students are having increasing difficulty resolving conflicts, you
might choose to reteach Lesson 8, Solving People Problems, and implement the supplemental activities
offered at the end of that lesson.

45
SUGGESTIONS FOR SUCCESS
As you teach the lessons in Strong Kids—Grades 6–8, you will increase your likelihood of success by observing
and following a few additional suggestions for successful implementation of the curriculum. We have
developed these suggestions through piloting the program in numerous settings and through the feedback we
have received from our associates who have used it in their schools and treatment centers.
• Practice your lessons before implementing them. Each lesson is slightly different and will require advance
preparation in the form of photocopying and generating examples, grouping, and in some cases
considering actors for a skit. Each lesson also will require your own personal involvement and
understanding of the subject matter. Each lesson builds on the previous, so the more prepared you are, the
more successful and efficient the lesson instruction will be.
• Be sure to give the students an overview of each lesson’s purpose. Explain that a different topic/unit will
be taught each week (or as frequently as possible), because students may come to expect a continuation of
a certain topic as opposed to a new topic each lesson.
• In our experience, folders that are specifically designated for students to store their handouts, notes, and
homework assignment sheets will help keep materials organized and will reduce the amount of time needed
by the teacher or group leader to start the weekly lessons. We suggest that you consider having all of your
students keep a special Strong Kids folder for this purpose. However, use the system that works best for
your students to organize their Strong Kids handouts.
• Ensure that you allow sufficient time to review the topics from prior lessons and integrate concepts when at
all possible.
• Introduce or reintroduce a behavior management technique, such as a token economy, to reinforce prosocial
behaviors during the unit. Remind students of your school and classroom rules as well as the rules
associated with this curriculum.
• This curriculum involves teaching a wide range of skills in a relatively short period of time. In order to use
your time most effectively, directly teach these skills. Place your priority on instruction and allowing your
students to ask questions. During the lessons, you may need to keep discussion and activity time to a
minimum. However, we encourage you to have in-depth discussions with your students as much as
possible during class meetings or as you integrate the concepts in other settings or in other classes.
• Reinforce any Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 skills that you might observe, both within and outside the teaching
setting. Make sure that parents, teachers, administrators, and other staff are aware of the skills you are
instructing, because your students will require frequent feedback in several settings in order for the skills
to be durable and generalized.
• Be prepared to include a “twist” to a scenario from your own experience or something the class may
recognize from recent experiences. Many lessons include references to twists in which a scenario is
presented from a different perspective or with additional context. Understand your students and
determine how much complexity you can add to the lessons to strengthen their interaction with the
content.
• Complete at least one homework example with the entire class or group to help them understand the
assignment and be prepared to complete it. It is recommended to complete the homework handouts from
the beginning lessons as a way to provide a model early on.
• As a general practice, we suggest that you do not add new students to the group once the program has already
started. Particularly when the program is taught to small groups of students rather than entire classrooms,
we have found that having new students join the group once it has started can be disruptive to the group
process and may result in a slowing of the flow of training as well as a reduction in the willingness of

46
 group members to participate. If you do find that you need to add students, look for an opportunity to
brief the new student or students separately in advance, and bring them up to speed on the topics
presented so far and how your group interacts and shares information. It may be important for you to also
brief the existing group so they are aware of the change and aware of how the new student(s) will be
incorporated into grouping and other activities.
• Look for opportunities to use the Tips for Transfer Training and Homework and the supplemental activities
that are found at the end of each lesson. These suggestions have been designed to facilitate the transfer of
skills learned through the program across different settings and to help students maintain what they have
learned over time. Again, we have included prompts for precorrecting errors in learning the expected
skills, reminding students of the concepts being learned, and commending students for demonstrating the
skills that have been introduced and taught in the program.
• Be on the lookout for signals from your students that they may need more support than the curriculum
can provide. Check the comment box regularly; students in immediate social and emotional need may
seek indirect routes to request help. Remember that these lessons are not intended for students in crisis or
for students who have more significant mental health needs. Lessons 1 and 12 include reminders about
connecting students to their larger network of supports for specific needs. Be prepared to provide these
contacts to students throughout the curriculum. Prior to starting Strong Kids, it is recommended that you
talk to your school psychologist or counselor about your implementation plans and learn more about the
mental health resources available at your school or site. As applicable, consider inviting your school’s
primary mental health practitioner (school psychologist, counselor, or other affiliated mental health
provider) into your class to introduce him- or herself to your students.

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The Big Ideas of Strong Kids—Grades 6–8
As noted previously, a successful curriculum adaptation process requires particular innovations and
modifications to meet the needs of specific individuals and groups. At the same time, these adaptations must
retain the general concepts, or big ideas, on which the curriculum is based. With this notion in mind, we list
the most important features of Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 with the hope that these ideas will be taken into
account when making any type of adaptation to the curriculum. With the underlying goals of improving SEL
curriculum and resilience in children and adolescents; preventing and reducing depression, anxiety, and other
internalizing disorders; and promoting awareness of moods and symptoms of internalizing disorders, these big
ideas include the following:
• To teach children and youth to understand their own and other people’s feelings
• To teach children and youth to understand the link between thoughts and emotions and to learn to
monitor and modulate them appropriately
• To teach children and youth to identify thinking traps that may interfere with healthy decision making
• To help students learn strategies for increasing habits for positive living
• To help children and youth learn to learn identify stress and cognitive and behavioral strategies to manage
stress
• To teach children and youth problem-solving skills, effective communication skills, and the anger model
to be more successful in social contexts (e.g., listening, being assertive)
• To teach children and youth to set appropriate and realistic goals based on their own values and to
monitor their behavior in order to reach their goals using SMART goals (specific, measurable, attainable,
relevant, and timely)
• To help students identify comfortable and uncomfortable feelings and distinguish healthy and unhealthy
ways to express emotions

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Specific Strategies for Making Cultural Adaptations
Keeping these big ideas in mind, Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 may be adapted to better fit the needs of diverse
children. It is critical to be culturally sensitive because often there are cultural differences in expressing
emotions. For this purpose, we propose a few guidelines for making cross-cultural adaptations. These
suggestions are based on our own experiences in attempting to adapt the Strong Kids curriculum with specific
cultural groups. They are also based in great measure on the premises of the American Psychological
Association’s Guidelines for Providers of Psychological Services to Ethnic, Linguistic, and Culturally Diverse
Populations (available at http://www.apa.org/pi/oema/resources/policy/provider-guidelines.aspx).
1. Get to know your students.
• Ask students about their cultural identities, activities, and rituals.
• Reflect on the dominant cultural variables in your classroom and how these aspects of culture affect
the way your students behave and think.
• Identify common success and failure experiences, problem situations, and challenging life
circumstances confronted by your students.
• Encourage students to share aspects of their culture with the larger group.
2. Get to know your students’ communities.
• Visit the families and, as appropriate, the homes of students in your class or group.
• Identify a cultural liaison to help you with your research about your students’ culture.
• Ask the cultural liaison to assist with the cultural adaptation process.
3. Deliver the curriculum in a manner that your students can understand.
• Modify the language of each lesson so that your students can easily understand the key ideas.
• Use examples and situations that match the lives of your students (e.g., change characters’ names,
include extended family, include children who use wheelchairs, use problem examples that your
students have experienced).
4. Encourage tolerance and establish a climate in which differences are viewed as resources, not deficits.
• Teach students ways to show respect for different cultural groups.
• Encourage and reinforce students for respecting the examples and comments made by their peers.
• Establish and enforce a classroom rule that teasing and name calling are not allowed.
5. Adapt assessment tools.
• Adapt the assessment materials so that students can understand (e.g., language, context).
• Pilot test some of the assessment materials with small groups of students prior to implementing the
curriculum to ensure that students understand the questions.
6. Become aware of variations within cultures. For example, some cultures tend to be more expressive and
value the discussion of individual emotions and beliefs, whereas others tend to be more reserved and value
privacy.
• Do not assume too much about a student’s culture or ethnicity.
• Avoid making overgeneralizations about cultural groups. Not all members of a culture act the same
way.
• Examine your own values, assumptions, and worldviews and how these are the same and different

49
 from those of your students.
• Continually examine the accuracy and fairness of your assumptions about the beliefs and behaviors of
different cultural groups.
7. Seek feedback.
• View the adaptation process as an ongoing process.
• Consult with students, your colleagues, and community members about the relevance and accuracy of
the adaptation efforts.
• Ask the students how well the curriculum is matching their needs and life experiences (see Castro-
Olivo, 2010).
In sum, adapting Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 or any other SEL curriculum for use with culturally and
linguistically diverse learners may be challenging, but it is essential if the curriculum is to have the most
meaningful impact on the learners. The suggestions we have offered in this section may be useful as a guide to
making the flexible Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 program appropriate for children and youth from a variety of
cultural backgrounds.

50
REFERENCES
Castro Olivo, S. (2010). One size does not fit all: Adapting SEL programs for use in our multicultural world. In K.W. Merrell & B.A.
Gueldner (Eds.), Social and emotional learning in the classroom: Promoting mental health and academic success. New York, NY: Guilford.
Castro-Olivo, S. (2014). Promoting social-emotional learning in adolescent Latino ELLs: A study of the culturally adapted Strong Teens
program. School Psychology Quarterly, 29, 567–577.
Fredrickson, B., & Losada, F. (2005). Positive affect and the complex aspects of human flourishing. American Psychologist, 60(7), 678–686.
Muñoz, R.F., Penilla, C., & Urizar, G. (2002). Expanding depression prevention research with children of diverse cultures. Prevention and
Treatment, 5. doi:10.1037/1522-3736.5.1.513c
Yu, D.L., & Seligman, M.E.P. (2002). Preventing depressive symptoms in Chinese children. Prevention and Treatment, 5.
doi.org/10.1037/1522-3736.5.1.59a

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CHAPTER 3

52
 Overview of the Lessons

The Strong Kids programs consist of 12 carefully sequenced lessons that are designed for maximum impact on
cognitive, affective, and social functioning within a relatively brief period of time. This chapter provides an
overview of each lesson. Read the descriptions carefully prior to preparing your first lesson so that you will
understand the lesson sequencing and the big ideas behind the Strong Kids programs.

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LESSON 1: ABOUT STRONG KIDS: EMOTIONAL STRENGTH TRAINING
In the first lesson, About Strong Kids: Emotional Strength Training, students are introduced to the program.
Behavioral expectations—including respectful listening of others, participation, and maintaining
confidentiality—are reviewed and discussed. A general overview of the overall curriculum and individual
lessons is presented, providing students with information regarding what they can expect over the course of
the program. Emotions and critical terms such as resilience, adversity, and perseverance are defined for the first
time, and students are encouraged to seek adult assistance if they are experiencing difficulties. If optional
student assessments are administered as part of the curriculum, they should be given to students for
completion during this first lesson.

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LESSONS 2 AND 3: UNDERSTANDING YOUR EMOTIONS
The second and third lessons, Understanding Your Emotions (1 and 2), are intended to improve students’
emotional vocabulary and awareness. Being able to understand and recognize one’s emotions is an important
skill for all individuals during all stages of their lives because people experience emotions at school, at home, at
work, and at play. Being able to recognize one’s emotions and react in a helpful way, even when the feeling is
uncomfortable, will allow students to create and sustain positive relationships in school and throughout their
lives.
In Understanding Your Emotions 1, students learn to identify different emotions and the physical
feelings that occur with emotions and to distinguish feelings as being comfortable or uncomfortable. Students
also learn to measure the intensity of emotions and begin to identify what the emotion may be communicating
about themselves or the situation they are experiencing. The goal of this lesson is to apply the skills learned to
different situations at different times and in different settings. In Understanding Your Emotions 2, students
learn that thoughts and behaviors are linked to emotions, and by identifying thoughts and behaviors, one can
better understand emotions and learn how to express oneself in a way that is helpful. Students also learn that
emotions are expressed differently, depending on the situation. Students then have the opportunity to use
their new skills in application exercises, making it more likely that they will be able to generalize the new skills
to other situations.

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LESSON 4: UNDERSTANDING OTHER PEOPLE’S EMOTIONS
The purpose of the fourth lesson, Understanding Other People’s Emotions, is to introduce students to the
concept and practice of empathy and thus help them better understand other people’s feelings. Although the
previous three lessons have focused on students’ own feelings, Lesson 4 covers the ability to recognize the
emotions of others and share their perspectives, an essential skill in conflict resolution and compassion.
Students who can identify the feelings of others are more likely to be tolerant of people with different views.
Students will learn to see clearly how their actions can affect the emotions of other people.
Children with antisocial tendencies often experience what is called hostile attribution, in which they
misperceive others’ emotions as anger. This misperception can lead to aggression and violence. Students who
practice empathy skills are more able to see a variety of emotions other than anger. By learning to look for
physical cues (sometimes referred to as clues), they may be more likely to discern the true feelings of others.
Lesson 4 first explains key concepts and then moves into identifying clues about the emotions other
people are feeling. Once students are able to identify the potential clues and what they might mean, the lesson
progresses to a role play in which students will experience how people may perceive the same situation
differently. The children will be asked to take the perspectives of others in order to gain a greater
understanding of empathy. Finally, the homework handout provides opportunities for students to apply these
skills to their own life experiences.

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LESSON 5: DEALING WITH ANGER
The fifth lesson, Dealing with Anger, teaches students that everyone experiences anger in his or her life.
Many students, however, are not able to appropriately understand and effectively deal with their anger.
Misunderstanding anger, and an inability to appropriately manage it, can often manifest itself in inappropriate
behaviors such as arguments and fights, depression, and severe frustration, each of which can have unfortunate
consequences.
This lesson teaches students to understand their anger through a multistep anger model and teaches skills
for helping them manage their anger. Anger is introduced as one of many normal emotions that serve a
purpose in helping people understand and adapt to the world. It is important that students understand two
basic concepts: 1) that anger is a normal emotion and 2) that anger serves the important function of protection
and motivation in our lives. Students are taught to understand anger using the sequential anger model to
improve their ability to recognize what anger looks like in action. In this lesson, students learn that anger does
not “just happen.” It is triggered by predictable events and progresses through a series of steps within which
individuals can play an active role. Students are taught to understand their active roles in the anger process
and the fact that they are not helpless “victims” of their anger but are active participants in choosing how to
respond to anger.

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LESSONS 6 AND 7: CLEAR THINKING
Individuals who are depressed and anxious are very likely to develop or have previously developed patterns of
unrealistic, distorted, and otherwise maladaptive cognitions or thoughts. The Clear Thinking lessons are
designed to help students to be more aware of their thought patterns and recognize how the students
themselves can contribute to their moods, choices, and actions. The lesson is divided into two parts: Clear
Thinking 1 and Clear Thinking 2. Clear Thinking 1 teaches students strategies that are helpful in recognizing
unhelpful or maladaptive thought patterns by providing descriptions of some of the more common “thinking
traps” that individuals use. When possible, the thought patterns such as “binocular vision,” “dark glasses,” and
“black-and-white thinking” are depicted both as visual icons and in simplified language to facilitate
comprehension and retention. Clear Thinking 2 uses the information provided in Clear Thinking 1 to teach
students techniques such as how to use evidence to proactively identify thinking traps and applying strategies
to reframe unhelpful thoughts and attributions. Practice exercises and vignettes are used for discussion.

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LESSON 8: SOLVING PEOPLE PROBLEMS
The eighth lesson, Solving People Problems, is designed to promote awareness of useful strategies for
resolving social conflict. Interpersonal conflict provides one of the most fertile breeding grounds for
depression, anxiety, and negative thinking. Thus, learning appropriate and effective ways to resolve these
conflicts may be a strong preventive factor for deterring emotional problems as well as social problems.
Because conflicts may occur daily and can be a source of stress and frustration for students, step-by-step
outlines for resolving conflicts are presented. This lesson details the use of a problem-solving model for
managing day-to-day social conflicts and presents techniques for its use and application. The lesson is
predominantly organized to address conflicts with peers; however, application of various strategies—such as
deal-making, compromising, discussion, and brainstorming—are presented in situations that involve
hierarchical relationships as well. Students will learn from this lesson that conflict is often a natural part of
social interaction and that, with the tools to address conflict, more social interactions can be approached with
awareness, respect, openness, sensitivity, and confidence. Practice exercises and role-play situations also are
used as examples and teaching tools.

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LESSON 9: LETTING GO OF STRESS
Using appropriate techniques to manage stress is an important strategy to promote emotional resilience and
prevent physical and emotional problems. Lesson 9, Letting Go of Stress, provides the foundation for
teaching students about stress and relaxation. Through the lesson and activities, the students will learn how to
identify stress in their lives. An opportunity is provided for students to learn a few relaxation techniques that
have been proven to be effective with many people as well as to generate their own ways of coping with stress.
The homework assignment allows students to apply the discussed techniques.
Students begin to learn about themselves and how to deal with stress in an effective and healthy manner.
Stress is a fact of every person’s life. Stress can be healthy to some degree; however, too much stress or not
dealing with it effectively can lead to long-term problems. The sooner students learn how to identify it and
deal with this aspect of being human, the better their chances are for a healthy existence. Learning how to let
go of stress is an integral skill in the development of a strong and resilient kid.

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LESSON 10: POSITIVE LIVING
Lesson 10, Positive Living, is new to the second edition of Strong Kids—Grades 6–8. It provides students with
strategies to incorporate positive habits into day-to-day life to offset negative habits that can affect health and
emotion. For students prone to negative thinking, positive feelings are promoted through a discussion of
lifestyle choices that involve physical health (eating and sleeping), emotional and mental health (TV time vs.
productive time), community connections (helping others and being involved), and family and social
connections (maintaining healthy relationships). Encouraging positive choices and thoughts about looking for
healthy options in our daily activities is intended to generate habits toward long-term well-being.
The Positive Living lesson is designed to arm all students, not just those who may be prone to pessimism
and spirals of negativity, with ways to think about day-to-day behaviors with intention so that healthy choices
can be made. The method includes training students to spot the difficult situations that may be changed by
altering areas of their lives in which they have more control.

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LESSON 11: CREATING STRONG AND SMART GOALS
Throughout life, people are asked to achieve many goals. Frequently, they are not taught the steps that are
necessary to achieve these goals. Research supports the idea that students who are able to set and achieve goals
independently perform better than students who are told what goals to achieve. This evidence also confirms
that learning how to engage more consistently in appropriate positive activities can help to reduce symptoms
of depression and anxiety. The steps outlined in this lesson are all necessary in order for students to attain
their goals as well as to identify values in the different domains of their lives. Learning these steps and having
immediate success by implementing them is crucial to the success of this lesson. If students set a short-term
goal first and are successful in the goal-attainment process, then they will be more likely to use the process
again in other applications. These steps are beneficial for students’ academic achievement, and when
individuals set realistic and attainable goals, they begin taking control of their lives, which leads to an increase
in the number of positive activities in which they participate. This lesson teaches students the skills necessary
to set realistic short- and long-term goals, to identify the key steps in attaining their goals, and to apply the
procedures to their own lives by increasing the amount of positive activities in which they are engaged.
Developing skills for increasing positive activities through setting and attaining positive goals is of critical
importance in sustaining positive mental health.
To this end, in this lesson students learn the skill of goal setting and increasing positive activity as a
means to a healthy life. This lesson addresses the importance of increasing and maintaining positive activities
and helps students develop an awareness of their own strengths and limitations across major life domains such
as physical, mental, and emotional health and engagement in school, family, and community. Students also set
SMART goals (those that are specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and timely), develop action plans for
goal attainment, and learn strategies for monitoring their progress and persevering after setbacks.

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LESSON 12: FINISHING UP!
The title of the final lesson, Finishing UP!, has a double meaning. It implies that this lesson is the final one in
the curriculum, but also it shows how we are striving to end on a positive or upbeat note, integrating the
learned concepts, and celebrating the accomplishments that have been made through involvement with the
Strong Kids curriculum. This lesson provides the opportunity for students to review key points and terms from
the lessons presented throughout the program. Issues of confidentiality are revisited, and information for
handling more critical emotional issues (using appropriate resources) is covered. The Finishing UP! lesson also
provides an opportunity for teachers to assess students using follow-up measures. These results can be
compared with the information gained from the optional preassessments that may be administered at the time
the first lesson is presented.

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CHAPTER 4

64
What’s New

65
 Updates to Strong Kids and Strong Teens

We have made some exciting and progressive changes to the Strong Kids and Strong Teens programs in light of
recent advances in the field of SEL and in response to user feedback. The following section describes the
major changes in content within the programs, changes across the levels of programs, and changes to the
lesson components.

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CHANGES TO THE CONTENT
In the revised versions of Strong Kids and Strong Teens, you will find substantive improvements to the content.
These changes are delineated as follows and in Table 4.1. First, the revisions better reflect the dynamic nature
of emotions and interpersonal relationships and promote cognitive flexibility and problem solving. Because
emotions are not always easy to identify, and they may not fall neatly into simple categories such as happy, sad,
or mad, we introduce emotion identification, including complex and concurrent emotions, earlier in the
program in order to develop more advanced emotional literacy. We have deemphasized the use of judgmental
terms such as appropriate and reduced the amount of dichotomies such as okay-not okay and positive-negative,
also allowing for the experience of emotions on a continuum of intensity. We use “twists” in examples, which
change a small aspect of the example, thereby altering the way students perceive the situation and the
outcome. We also include more modern graphics to pique the interest of students and help ground the more
abstract ideas. The updated scenarios better capture the more challenging and realistic situations that students
experience.
Table 4.1. New content by lesson

Lesson and topic Summary of new content

1. About Strong Kids: Emotional Strength The concept of emotions is introduced in Lesson 1 rather than in Lesson 2.
Training Introduces emotion names, including a broader scope of emotional vocabulary and images of children modeling
emotions
Introduces the concept of concurrent emotions
Introduces mindfulness-based focusing activities

2. Understanding Your Emotions 1 Lesson 2 introduces the concept of physical feelings associated with emotions.
Normalizes feelings of discomfort
Includes strategies to promote mindfulness of emotions, thoughts, and physical feelings

3. Understanding Your Emotions 2 Lesson 3 introduces the concept of emotions, thoughts, and behaviors interacting.
Includes discussion of the ways in which behaviors communicate emotions, including helpful and unhelpful behaviors
Includes discussion of avoidance or repression of feelings
Considers the context in the expression of emotions: The way we show how we’re feeling depends on where we are,
who we are with, what we want/need in the situation.

4. Understanding Other People’s Emotions In the revised programs, this lesson is sequenced before the lesson on anger to provide more instruction on empathy
and alternative perspectives first.
Introduces enhanced distinctions between empathy and sympathy
Includes enhanced discussion and role play regarding perspective taking

5. Dealing with Anger Lesson 5 frames the reaction to anger as a range of choices.
Introduces the option of not reacting when experiencing anger
Includes concepts pertaining to complex and concurrent emotions: Anger can be experienced along with emotions like
sadness or jealousy.

6. Clear Thinking 1 “Thinking errors” are now defined as “thinking traps.”

Introduces two new cognitive distortions or thinking traps: “All alone,” the feeling that one’s experiences are so unique
that no one else could possibly understand, and “broad brush,” overgeneralizing from one experience, often at play in
the development of stereotypes
Addresses another cognitive distortion, a belief that one’s feelings and thoughts are reality; in this lesson and in Clear
Thinking 2

7. Clear Thinking 2 Lesson 7 introduces the new concept of “snowball effect”; that is, one thinking trap can lead to more thinking traps or
an accumulation of pessimistic thinking.
Includes scenarios that address perfectionistic thinking; an example pertains to perfectionistic thoughts about body
image
Includes discussion about identifying patterns or habits of thought, in addition to intensity, as a way to identify
distorted perceptions
Includes new, more concrete analogies and images to help students understand the concept of reframing

8. Solving People Problems Lesson 8 emphasizes respectful and responsible choices about personal behavior based on social norms, realistic

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 evaluation of consequences of various actions, and the well-being of self and others.
Includes expanded options to resolving conflicts using a problem-solving model
Includes gray areas or less clear-cut examples

9. Letting Go of Stress Lesson 9 reframes stress, shifting from a perception that the stressor is harmful to one that stress can pose a healthy
challenge.
Illustrates how to evaluate expectations as realistic or unrealistic
Includes procrastination and avoidance
Includes more activities to help students cope with stress (e.g., nature, physical activity, deep breathing, diet)

10. Positive Living Lesson 10 replaces the previous edition’s Positive Thinking lesson.
Includes ways to promote a sense of personal control and facilitate the development of healthy habits and activities
across school, home, and community settings.
Provides students with the opportunity to assess their daily routines and whether or not they are helpful
Introduces the concepts of balance and evaluating actions that may have short- and/or long-term benefits

11. Creating Strong and SMART Goals Lesson 11 introduces setting SMART (specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and timely) goals (Doran, 1981).
Promotes self-assessment in areas of physical and emotional health and school, family, and community connections;
identification of personal strengths and areas for growth
Emphasizes effort and a growth mindset (e.g., Dweck, 2006) and perseverance after setbacks

12. Finishing UP! Lesson 12 provides more integration of critical concepts found across all lessons.
Promotes more awareness of when help may be needed
Includes a section on accessing community resources and where to go for help
Emphasizes resilience and persistence

The experience of distressing emotions such as anger or sadness is discussed in this edition using a
slightly different orientation. Rather than conveying only the message that uncomfortable feelings are
something to change or fix, we emphasize the value of simply listening to what our bodies are communicating
through these emotions. The intention is to build a tolerance for discomfort and thereby reduce reactivity.
Also, in keeping with a major impetus of the original programs—to address SEL issues associated with
students who internalize their emotions—we discuss both the potential negative consequences of acting out
and withdrawing, hiding, and repressing emotions.
We address issues that students increasingly experience in global society. We integrate sociocultural
issues in discussions of emotional awareness, expression, and empathy. Because with whom and where we
express our emotions can be just as important as how we express our emotions, we discuss emotional
expression in terms of not just actions but also the context or setting. Throughout the programs, we use more
current and authentic examples and reference problems that students today are likely to experience, such as
social networking dilemmas, stereotypes, and other complex social situations. We also have anticipated the
developmental changes that students experience with age and peer groups.
Because many of the main concepts of the Positive Thinking lesson (e.g., optimism and resilience) are
now infused throughout many of the lessons, we have added a new lesson, Positive Living, to replace the
Positive Thinking lesson. This new lesson promotes a sense of personal control over daily behaviors and
actions and promotes the development of healthy habits across school, home, and community settings. To
build on these concepts, the next lesson incorporates SMART (specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and
timely) goals (Doran, 1981). Setting SMART goals helps to ensure that goals are realistic and achievable.
In the new edition, we have worked to improve issues often experienced in the promotion of SEL, such
as sustainability and generalizability. We now offer a diverse menu of activities to promote the integration of
content across settings and the maintenance of skills over time. Whereas Chapter 12, Finishing UP!, was
primarily a review of the lessons in the original version of the programs, this lesson now better promotes the
integration of critical concepts. Last, to reinforce the concepts introduced previously, we draw more explicit
connections across the lessons.
In addition to the new content, we also incorporate more methods to promote student engagement and
involvement. Many of the lessons include an introductory activity to highlight the relevance of the content,
stimulate thought, and/or pique the students’ interest in the material. Also, several lessons include a menu of

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activities so that instructors can select the application activity that best suits his or her students.

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SOCIAL AND EMOTIONAL COMPETENCIES
CASEL, the leader in SEL research, policy, and implementation efforts, promotes five person-centered and
interrelated competency areas that are essential to cognitive, social, and emotional development: self-
awareness, self-management, social awareness, relationship skills, and responsible decision making (CASEL,
2014; Zins et al., 2004). The new versions of Strong Kids and Strong Teens have stronger, more explicit
connections to the five SEL competencies as defined by CASEL. At the beginning of each lesson, the
connection to the SEL competencies is explicitly illustrated by a user-friendly graphic. This helps support
planning and documentations of the alignment of SEL instruction with these well-established competencies.
The connections between the competencies and the corresponding lesson are depicted in Table 4.2.

Table 4.2. Lessons and social and emotional competencies

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MINDFULNESS-BASED PRACTICES
In preparation for the second edition of the curriculum, our review of the literature indicated that the use of
mindfulness-based practices (MBPs) has grown in its application with youth and in schools (Burke, 2010;
Harnett & Dawe, 2012; Meiklejohn et al., 2012; Zenner et al., 2014). MBPs such as breathing exercises,
sitting meditation, and yoga have been used for many years. Secularized versions of these practices have been
scientifically studied over the past 30 years, most notably through the Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction
(MBSR) program (Kabat-Zinn, 2013). MBPs that are used for children and adolescents have been adapted
from many of the MBSR practices and rendered developmentally appropriate for use in schools and mental
health care settings. Research is in the early stages with youth, yet MBPs show promising evidence for
yielding positive benefits in such areas as awareness and acceptance, emotion and behavioral regulation,
attention, academic engagement and performance, and social competence (see Burke, 2010; Harnett, &
Dawe, 2012; Meiklejohn et al., 2012; Zenner et al., 2014, for reviews of this literature).
In conceptualizing the infusion of brief MBPs into Strong Kids—Grades 6–8, we reviewed literature
pertinent to applying MBPs with clinical and nonclinical populations, the use of MBPs in schools and other
settings, the hypothesized mechanisms for how MBPs may work to produce their effects (e.g., Teper, Segal,
& Inzlicht, 2013), how MBPs may build resilience (e.g., Coholic, Eys, & Lougheed, 2012), and issues
relevant to feasibility and acceptability by youth and school personnel. We also drew from the literature
describing evidence-based therapies that have cognitive-behavioral roots, which infused principles of
mindfulness and practice, such as mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT), dialectic behavioral therapy,
and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). Because of the time constraints involved in adding another
activity to an existing program, we reviewed examples of practices that were brief (e.g., Flook, Goldberg,
Pinger, Bonus, & Davidson, 2014; Schonert-Reichl & Hymel, 2007) and complemented cognitive-behavioral
therapy–oriented approaches to teaching students about emotions and selfregulation (e.g., Broderick & Metz,
2009).
Our intention is to preserve the wellness promotion and cognitive-behavioral theoretical orientation that
was the basis of the first edition of Strong Kids—Grades 6–8. Strong Kids is not a mindfulness-centered
curriculum. We aimed for a transformative approach whereby an existing program may be enhanced through
the use of a variety of brief MBPs and by infusing general concepts of a mindfulness perspective throughout
the lessons. Instruction and examples use a tone of acceptance and openness to experience that may range
from comfortable to uncomfortable. The use of terms perceived as judgmental (e.g., “good” and “bad,”
“appropriate” and “inappropriate”) were reframed as “helpful” and “unhelpful” whenever the context supported
such a change. Furthermore, emotional experience is reframed to include the notion that emotions, and
associated thoughts and feelings, also can be experienced and investigated rather than automatically pushed
away or changed.
The MBPs in the 12 lessons are adapted from the foundational elements of MBSR (Kabat-Zinn, 2013)
and other evidence-based sources. In designing each exercise, we drew inspiration from resources such as
Hooker and Fodor’s (2008) overview of activities that have been tested with children, Saltzman’s (2014)
approach to teaching these concepts to youth, and Semple and Lee’s (2011) application of mindfulness within
a cognitive therapy orientation with children with internalizing problems.
Each activity is found in the Introduction section and is referred to as a Mindfulness-Based Focusing
Activity in the lesson. Students are given an explanation for the activity in Lesson 1, along with some ideas to
explain what they can expect in starting the activities. A script is provided for convenience and efficiency and,
in keeping with the spirit of Strong Kids, to decrease the amount of preparation time for instructors. Please
note that these activities are optional. If your institution chooses, simply omit it and continue with the
Introduction to the lesson.
Some instructors may wish to have more background information and additional training in MBPs to
better understand and implement these ideas. For additional information on mindfulness you may wish to
visit our companion web site www.strongkidsresources.com and the following Internet resources:

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 Association for Mindfulness in Education (AME): A collaborative association of organizations and
•
individuals working together to provide support for mindfulness training as a component of K–12
education; http://www.mindfuleducation.org/
• Garrison Institute’s Initiative on Contemplation and Education: Working to develop the field of
contemplative education for K–12 educators and classrooms; https://www.garrisoninstitute.org
• Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) and the Center for Mindfulness at University of
Massachusetts Medical School; http://www.umassmed.edu/cfm/

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CHANGES ACROSS THE PROGRAM LEVELS
We were often asked how the programs differ across the developmental levels of the programs; that is, how
does Strong Kids—Grades 3–5 differ from Strong Kids—Grades 6–8, and how does Strong Kids—Grades 6–8
differ from Strong Teens? The new programs have been revised to better target, differentiate, and address
developmental considerations of SEL.
The Strong Kids and Strong Teens lesson topics were selected to reflect the most critical components of
resilience and align to the five competencies of SEL, lending well to the implementation of the program as a
universal or schoolwide SEL program. The programs are based on theory and research that indicates that each
SEL competence can be taught effectively to children of all ages. Children and adolescents alike can benefit
from learning how to identify and manage their emotions, take the perspectives of others, and make
responsible decisions. For these reasons, the lesson topics and objectives remain stable across all three levels of
the programs. Therefore, although it is beneficial to implement the programs to students each year, Strong
Kids—Grades 3–5 is not a prerequisite to Strong Kids—Grades 6–8, and Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 is not a
prerequisite to Strong Teens. Students can benefit from the programs regardless of the level at which they first
receive instruction. However, the SEL topics bring different contexts and different meanings for students as
they age. Making a responsible decision can present more complex considerations for an adolescent than for a
student in third grade. Thus, although the major objectives remain unchanged across the levels, the ways in
which the lessons approach the objectives are adjusted to fit the development of the student. As the levels
advance, the instruction and examples become increasingly sophisticated and abstract. Whereas Strong Kids
focuses on more concrete concepts and issues relevant to elementary and middle school, Strong Teens addresses
more abstract concepts and uses examples with more complex social situations and issues that are more
relevant to teens, such as postsecondary planning.

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NEW LESSON COMPONENTS
Although the lessons continue to follow a standardized format, we have added several elements to all the
lessons: 1) SEL competencies, 2) suggestions for when instructors are running short on time, 3) instructor
reflection, 4) introductory mindfulness-based focusing activity, 5) putting it all together, 6) closing breathing
activity, and 7) additional activities. These changes were made in response to the most progressive
advancements in research, theory, and science of implementation in the field of SEL.

Running Short on Time?

Time is one of our scarcest resources, particularly in modern, busy schools. This section includes
recommended ways instructors can segment lessons when the full amount of time needed to implement a
single lesson is not available. Guidance for segmenting lessons is found in Chapter 1 and at the beginning of
each lesson. These are only suggested recommendations, and we understand that the implementation will vary
for every user or setting.

Instructor Reflection
In keeping with the original intent of the Strong Kids programs, we are continuously considering ways in
which we might help busy practitioners feel better prepared to teach SEL programs such as Strong Kids and
Strong Teens. This section provides a few helpful suggestions for instructors to get acquainted with the
concepts in each lesson and to have the opportunity to practice skills prior to teaching the lesson. Also, it
allows users to reflect on their personal experiences with the skills taught in each lesson. Understanding how
one has coped can help facilitate a more successful implementation of the lesson.

Optional Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity

A brief, 2- to 3-minute, scripted mindfulness activity is placed at the beginning of each lesson to promote
calm, focus, and enhanced awareness of experience in preparation for the lesson content. The mindfulness
activities at the start of each lesson begin with a standard activity that promotes nonjudgmental observation of
the present moment by instructing students to become aware of their body positioning (hands and feet resting
in place) and the sensation of their natural breath. Beginning in the second lesson and onto the last lesson
(12), the standard activity is followed by more content-specific practice. For example, in the lesson teaching
awareness of thoughts, students are asked to become aware of thoughts as they arrive, to watch them, and to
let them pass. In the lesson that focuses on perspective-taking, students participate in an activity that
promotes awareness of sounds; in the lesson on managing stress, a loving-kindness exercise toward one’s self is
applied. In a lesson focusing on awareness of thoughts and attributions, students practice noticing thoughts
and labeling them in categories such as “planning,” and they practice loving-kindness toward others in a lesson
on coping with social conflict. Other activities include noticing the breath and how the body moves during
breathing, an exercise modeled after the body scan used in MBSR, a whole-body movement exercise, and
imagining success or accomplishment and the thoughts and physical sensations that correspond. A
culminating activity for the last lesson incorporates elements of the previous activities into one. We selected
language intentionally to promote a sense of curiosity, kindness, and nonjudgment.

Putting It All Together

This section serves the purpose of the former “integrating key concepts” section and further encourages active
application of the key skills within the lesson as a whole concept.

Closing Breathing Activity

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At the end of each lesson, a 1-minute diaphragmatic breathing exercise, also scripted, is used to promote
relaxation (e.g., Larson, El Ramahi, Conn, Estes, & Ghibellini, 2010) and reflection and assimilation of the
lesson content.

Additional Activities and Homework

This section offers additional innovative ways to teach the content outside of the lesson and may bolster skills
maintenance and generalization. For teachers who are unable to make use of homework assignments with
their groups, we no longer “require” homework but list it as optional. Extra practice is always best, but
whether or not homework is completed should not hinder the next lesson.

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SUMMARY
Our efforts to create an effective, user-friendly, and practical mental health promotion program, coupled with
the real-world experience and feedback we gained over nearly 20 years of research and development and use,
have convinced us that the Strong Kids curriculum has much to offer and can be a valuable tool for facilitating
SEL and promoting resilience. It is our hope that the changes that have been made to the Strong Kids
programs are positive and helpful, not only in the lives of the students who will be receiving the program but
also in the lives of the adults who will be spending time teaching it. We hope that users who were acquainted
with the first edition of the Strong Kids programs find the updated versions familiar, but with new twists and
fresh angles, and that new users of the Strong Kids programs find the second edition intuitive, cohesive, and
timely. As you use the program and its examples to support your students, we encourage you to consider your
own experiences. We hope that not only will you make important connections for and with your students, but
you may also stumble onto new ways to look at old problems of your own.

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REFERENCES
Broderick, P.C., & Metz, S. (2009). Learning to BREATHE: A pilot trial of a mindfulness curriculum for adolescents. Advances in School
Mental Health Promotion, 2, 35–46.
Burke, C.A. (2010). Mindfulness-based approaches with children and adolescents: A preliminary review of current research in an emergent
field. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 19(2), 133–144. doi:10.1007/s10826-009-9282-x
Coholic, D., Eys, M., & Lougheed, S. (2012). Investigating the effectiveness of an arts-based and mindfulness-based group program for the
improvement of resilience in children in need. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 21(5), 833–844. doi:10.1007/s10826-011-9544-2
Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning. (2014). What is SEL? Skills and competencies. Retrieved from
http://www.casel.org/social-and-emotional-learning/core-competencies
Doran, G.T. (1981). There’s a S.M.A.R.T. way to write management’s goals and objectives. Management Review, 11, 35–36.
Dweck, C.S. (2006). Mindset: The new psychology of success. New York, NY: Random House.
Flook, L., Goldberg, S.B., Pinger, L., Bonus, K., & Davidson, R.J. (2013). Mindfulness for teachers: A pilot study to assess effects on stress,
burnout, and teaching efficacy. Mind, Brain, and Education, 7, 182–195. doi:10.1111/mbe.12026
Harnett, P.H., & Dawe, S. (2012). The contribution of mindfulness-based therapies for children and families and proposed conceptual
integration. Child and Adolescent Mental Health, 17(4), 195–208. doi:10.1111/j.1475-3588.2011.00643.x
Hooker, K.E., & Fodor, I.E. (2008). Teaching mindfulness to children. Gestalt Review, 12, 75–91. Retrieved from
http://www.gisc.orgwww.gisc.org/gestaltreview/documents/TeachingMindfulnesstoChildren.pdf
Kabat-Zinn, J. (2013). Full catastrophe living (Rev. ed.). New York, NY: Bantam.
Larson, H., El Ramahi, M., Conn, S., Estes, L., & Ghibellini, A. (2010). Reducing test anxiety among third grade students through the
implementation of relaxation techniques, Journal of School Counseling, 8, 1–19.
Meiklejohn, J., Phillips, C., Freedman, M.L., Griffin, M.L., Biegel, G., Roach, A., … Saltzman, A. (2012). Integrating mindfulness training
into K–12 education: Fostering the resilience of teachers and students. Mindfulness, 3(4), 291–307. doi:10.1007/s12671-012-0094-5
Saltzman, A. (2014). A still quiet place: A mindfulness program for teaching children and adolescents to ease stress and difficult emotions. Oakland, CA:
New Harbinger Publications.
Schonert-Reichl, K.A., & Hymel, S. (2007). Educating the heart as well as the mind social and emotional learning for school and life success.
Education Canada, 47, 20–25. Retrieved from http://www.jcsh-cces.ca/upload/Educating_Heart_Spring07-1.pdf
Semple, R., & Lee, J. (2011). Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy for anxious children. A manual for treating childhood anxiety. Oakland, CA: New
Harbinger Publications.
Teper, R., Segal, Z., & Inzlicht, M. (2013). Inside the mindful mind: How mindfulness enhances emotion regulation through improvements in
executive control. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 22, 449–454. doi:10.1177/0963721413495869
Zenner, C., Herrnleben-Kurz, S., & Walach, H. (2014). Mindfulness-based interventions in schools—A systematic review and meta-analysis.
Frontiers in Psychology, 5, 603. Retrieved from http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4075476/
Zins, J.E., Bloodworth, M.R., Weissberg, R.P., & Walberg, H.J. (2004). The scientific base linking social and emotional learning to school
success. In J. Zins, M. Wang, & H. Walberg (Eds.), Building academic success and social-emotional learning: What does the research say? New
York, NY: Teachers College Press.

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SECTION II

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The Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 Curriculum

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80
 About Strong Kids: Emotional Strength Training

SEL Competencies Addressed in This Lesson

Teacher Notes

Purpose and Objectives

This lesson orients students to the curriculum and introduces emotional vocabulary. In this lesson, students
will
• Be introduced to the curriculum and the plan for regular instruction
• Learn the expected behaviors for participation in the curriculum
• Begin to identify emotions

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Materials Needed
Supplements 1.1–1.2 (online download)
Supplement 1.3 (online download and preprint)
Supplement 1.4–1.6 (online download)
Supplement 1.7 (homework handout)
Comment Box

Running Short on Time?

Suggested stopping points: end of Optional Pretest Assessments or end of the Awareness Statement to
Instructor and Students section and the Closure section. See Chapter 1 for more information on segmenting
lessons.

Instructor Reflection

You and your students are embarking on a 12-lesson journey that explores our social and emotional lives.
Research demonstrates that learning about our social and emotional world helps build resilience and can offset
the negative effects of the fast-paced and stressful society in which we live. Before you lead your students
through each lesson, you may feel more comfortable with the materials if you take some time to reflect on
each lesson’s content as it relates to you, your understanding of the information, and your own experiences.
An Instructor Reflection exercise is provided at the beginning of each lesson to allow you time to reflect on
the content you are about to present. Also, you may find it helpful to review the introductory material in
Chapters 1 through 4 before beginning the lessons. The star icon (see margin), used throughout all lessons,
signifies that these chapters offer additional explanation or information pertinent to the lesson content or
administrative guidelines, which can help you implement the lesson.

For this lesson, consider how the behavioral expectations for participating in the curriculum align with
your classroom behavior expectations. Note that special consideration is given to the fact that students will
share personal information and thus it will be treated as confidential within the group. Consider how you
might remind students to be respectful to one another when they share. You also may wish to review the list
of emotions in Supplement 1.6 and consider how you experience and perceive emotions. Are there some
emotions with which you feel more, or less, comfortable? Consider potential roadblocks you may face in
presenting this information, or concerns that may arise, and identify colleagues with whom you can
collaborate and any resources available to you at your site.

Introduction

1 MIN.
In this section and the sections that follow, sample scripts are provided. You may use the scripts, or your own
words, during instruction. For this first section, talk to students about the fact that they are starting a new
program called Strong Kids. Give examples on the topics that will be covered, and indicate that the skills they

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learn will help them be socially and emotionally stronger in their lives. Ask students what they think they
might need to be socially and emotionally strong.
Sample Script
Today, we will begin a new program called Strong Kids. Strong Kids is about learning ways we can be strong and healthy with our minds and
bodies and in our relationships with other people. We’ll learn how to understand our emotions and other people’s emotions. We’ll talk about how to
solve problems, how to set goals, and how to think in a way that helps us and makes us stronger. We will meet [e.g., once per week] for [e.g., 45
minutes]. This program will help you learn skills that you will practice in order to be socially and emotionally healthy throughout your life. What
do you think is needed to be socially and emotionally strong?

Optional Pretest Assessments

10-20 MINS.

If you are using assessment measures to evaluate student growth during the Strong Kids curriculum, have your
students complete the pretests at this time. Administer the same assessment measures again after Lesson 12,
Finishing UP! We suggest using the Strong Kids Knowledge Test (see Appendix A) to measure students’
knowledge of the concepts covered in the lessons. You also may use other assessment tools of your choosing.
Visit http://www.strongkidsresources.com to review measures that have been useful. Tell students it is okay if
they don’t know the answers to the questions on the measurement tools. The tests are used to evaluate what
they know now. When all students have a copy of the pretest, provide them with the appropriate instructions.
The amount of time it will take to complete these assessments will depend on the number of assessment
measures and the length of each. Ten to 20 minutes is an estimate. See Chapter 2 for more information on
adjusting the curriculum to fit the needs of your students.
Sample Script
First, I’m going to ask you to answer some questions that will help me understand what you know about emotions. There are no right or wrong
answers, and you may not have heard some of the words before, but do your best work and answer all of the questions. Raise your hand if you need
help understanding any of the questions. I’ll start by reading the directions, then you can begin answering the questions.

Introduce the Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity

3 MINS.

Discuss with students that they will participate in a mindfulness, or focusing, activity at the start of every
lesson. Discuss that they may feel awkward or restless at first and they have the option to keep their eyes open.
These brief activities are intended to teach students a skill that can help them focus at the beginning of each
lesson and concentrate on the lesson. Use Supplement 1.1 as a download to illustrate the limbic system in the
brain. For background and implementation information on these activities, please see Chapter 4.
Sample Script

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 At the start of each lesson, we will begin with an activity to settle our bodies and focus our minds. This focusing, or mindfulness, activity will help
to train your brain to pay attention, learn new information, understand how you feel, and make positive choices. In the middle of our brains, we
have an information processing center called the limbic system. This system processes emotions and communicates with the front part of our brain,
right where our foreheads are, that helps us think clearly and make decisions. When we are feeling stressed, anxious, or upset, the limbic system
sends an alert signal to our bodies, making us feel uncomfortable. Sometimes, this feels like we want to fight or get away from something, or stay
put. When this happens, the front part of our brain doesn’t work as well and we may react very quickly without thinking things through. It’s like
pouring water into a bowl that’s turned upside down—the water that is needed won’t go into the bowl. When our limbic system sends strong
signals throughout our body, we might have a harder time remembering information and making positive choices. When we are more focused and
calm or feeling creative, hopeful, and compassionate, our brains work more efficiently and can work with information in a logical, helpful way. In
this case, this is like pouring water straight into an upturned bowl. We remember the information and think about it more deeply.
I will ask you to close your eyes or look at a point on the floor in front of you, breathe, and pay attention to what I’m saying. If you choose to
keep your eyes open, please look only at the space in front of you, not at your neighbor. You want to focus on what you feel, not what your neighbor
is doing. You may feel a little uncomfortable, awkward, or restless at first, but it gets easier the more we practice.

Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity

2 MINS.
Sample Script
Let’s begin. Close your eyes, or leave your eyes open and look at a point in front of you on the floor or on your desk. Now, rest your hands
comfortably on your desk or in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor or your hands as they rest. Just like scientists are curious, or interested in things
around them, we are going to start each lesson by exploring, in a kind and curious way, what it feels like to pay attention to some of the messages
our bodies send us and to some of the things around us. Let’s start by taking three breaths together and paying attention to our breath. Just breathe
as you normally do. [Pause.] Now, pay attention to what it feels like taking a breath in and a breath out. Maybe you feel air going in through
your nose or mouth and going out your nose or mouth. [Pause.] Maybe you feel your stomach moving. Let’s spend about a minute just noticing
what breathing feels like in our bodies. [Allow 1 minute to practice awareness.] Now, let’s take two breaths together. [Pause. Model two slow
breaths.] When you finish letting out your breath, slowly open your eyes. Now that we’ve practiced becoming aware of our breathing, we are ready
to move on to our lesson.

Defining Behavior Expectations and Participation

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 1.2 to introduce and review the expectations for being in the group and their definitions.
These expectations are important to follow so that everyone feels safe in sharing and participating in the
discussion. Students will be asked to share personal information but are never obligated to do this, especially if
they feel too uncomfortable. See below (after the Sample Script) for an optional idea for a way in which
students can communicate if they feel uncomfortable sharing or have questions or concerns. If you choose to
include this option, include it as part of your introduction and before reviewing the guidelines in detail.
Sample Script
You are now a part of a group with some important expectations or rules. During the Strong Kids lessons, you may be asked to share personal
stories. When someone is sharing a story, we will listen quietly. Sharing this information outside of the group is not allowed. Your classmates are
trusting you to keep the information private. If someone outside of our group asks you to share information about something someone in our group
shared during these lessons, just say: “I can’t tell you that; those discussions are private” or “What’s said in the group stays in the group.” If you feel
uncomfortable sharing, you can stop at any time. If you want to talk about your situation in private, please talk to me personally. It’s important to
remain respectful toward one another as we are learning these skills. Here are the expectations:
Respect others: Listen quietly when someone is speaking. Pay attention.
Come prepared and do your best work: Complete any activities assigned from the last lesson. Participate in activities to the best of your ability.
Personal information stays in the group: What is talked about in the group stays with the group. Do not gossip about what other people have shared.
[Consider explaining what gossip is; e.g., saying things about other people that might hurt their feelings.]

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Optional: There may be students who may feel uncomfortable speaking to you about a particular concern. To
encourage these students to share or obtain your assistance privately, you may wish to consider a comment
box, with preprinted comment slips, whereby students can write a question or concern and drop it in the box.
Use Supplement 1.3 as a download and preprint to show students an example of the comment slip. Please see
Chapter 2 for ways in which you can address comments that may be concerning.
Sample Script
You can also fill out a comment slip [show Supplement 1.3] and put it in this Comment Box. On the slip, you will write your name and your
concern/question or comments if you are uncomfortable sharing with the group. If I talk about something I read in the Comment Box, I will be
careful not to say who wrote it and I will leave out any parts that could give clues about who wrote it. All comments and questions are important.

Activity A: Practicing the Expectations

3 MINS.

Use Supplement 1.2 to review the expectations and discuss examples and nonexamples of following the
expectations. You also can ask the class to share their own examples and nonexamples. Note: An “example”
reflects the appropriate or intended use of a term or concept (to do). A “nonexample” illustrates the opposite
of the concept (not to do). It is helpful to include examples and nonexamples that are not quite so obvious—
those that define ambiguous or gray areas. This could include a nonexample of the “personal information stays
in the group” rule, which describes a vague post to social media or other electronic communication (e.g., text).
Sample Script
Let’s discuss some examples of following the expectations and some nonexamples of following the expectations. Examples mean those choices that
you want to or are expected to make. Nonexamples are those choices that you don’t want to or shouldn’t make. Here are the rules:
Respect others.
• Example: You listen quietly while someone is speaking and until they finish what they are saying.
• Nonexamples: You talk to your neighbor while someone is speaking. You “tune out” or begin working on something else.

Come prepared and do your best work.

• Example: You complete the work you were asked to do.
• Nonexamples: You didn’t do the worksheet that was assigned. You complete the worksheet in a rushed way right before class or in another class.

Personal information stays in the group.

• Example: Someone who’s not in the group asks you what someone shared during the class. You tell this person, “What’s said in the group stays in
the group!”
• Nonexample: You either say what happened or you say, “Wow, I can’t tell you what she said, but Shanna was really weird today in class.”

Awareness Statement to Instructor and Students

2 MINS.

Explain to students that Strong Kids will focus on talking about situations and emotions. Discuss that if
anyone feels uncomfortable, it is important to seek additional support. Identify people with whom students
can talk (e.g., teacher, parent, school counselor, principal) and brainstorm ways that students can

85
communicate their concerns. At the end of the program, students will have another opportunity to identify
whether additional support is needed and where they may go to obtain support. As the lessons progress,
remain vigilant for students who appear to be experiencing difficulty or having an uncomfortable response to
the content. See Chapter 2 for ideas on how to identify and address these issues.
Sample Script
During the next several weeks, we will talk about different situations and emotions. If you find that you are feeling worried or upset and aren’t
sure what to do about it, it’s important that you talk to an adult. Let’s talk about whom you can talk to if you feel this way. [Invite some
discussion on this topic.]

Review the Lesson Topics

1-2 MINS.

Use Supplement 1.4 to introduce the lesson topics that will be discussed.
Sample Script
During this program, we will be discussing these topics that are covered in 12 lessons. ,As part of each topic, there will be activities that involve
partners or small-group discussions, role plays, scenarios, handouts, and video clips that will help you learn the concepts.

Key Terms and Definitions

2 MINS.

Use Supplement 1.5 as a handout to define the key terms that will be used in this lesson.
Sample Script
Here are some important terms that will help us understand the information we’ll talk about in Strong Kids. We’ll define the words and discuss
examples to understand what they mean.

Introduction to Emotions

5-10 MINS.
Everyone has emotions. Emotions are like signals that tell us something about our situation.
Sample Script
Traffic lights are signals that tell you to slow down, stop, or go. Emotions are like signals too. Emotions say, “Hey! Pay attention! You’re
experiencing something you like, don’t like, or aren’t sure about.” We can feel one emotion, like anger, or several emotions at the same time, like
disappointment, irritation, and anger. Emotions are our body’s way of telling us about a situation. Everyone has emotions, every day, and
everywhere!

Activity B: Identifying Emotions

4-9 MINS.

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Use Supplement 1.6 as a visual aid to show students a variety of emotions they may experience. This activity
can be done with a large group or in small groups. Students also can identify and discuss emotions not on this
list.
Sample Script
Let’s talk about emotions that you might feel now or have felt in the past. This could be one emotion or a couple that you feel at the same time.
We’ll also talk about how the emotions acted as signals about a situation. Understanding our emotions helps us to persevere and be resilient, or to
work hard to meet our goals and bounce back when things are difficult.

Ask students to do the following

1. Identify a single emotion or combination of emotions they are feeling now or that they felt during a
specific event such as the school’s last team game, the last assembly, or a car trip with their family.
Sample Script
Look at the list of names and pictures of emotions. Taking turns, let’s discuss emotions that you are feeling now or that you have felt recently. For
example, if my best friend got a new phone, I might feel happy for her and also envious of her.

2. Draw lines to the emotions that they might feel at the same time.
Sample Script
Often, you will experience more than one emotion at the same time. Look at the list again and think about the emotions you might experience
together. You can draw a line that connects the emotions.

3. Discuss how the emotion was acting like a signal.

Sample Script
Next, let’s talk about how these emotions act like a signal and give us information. For example, if my friend got a new phone, I might feel some
emotions about that. My emotions might be telling me that I feel envious, because I want the same phone too. I might use this signal to motivate
me to do something about the situation. I might start to think of a way to earn the money to get it or how to talk to my parents about getting a
phone.

Putting It All Together

2-3 MINS.

Use the following activity to practice the concepts discussed in this lesson.
Sample Script
Let’s practice what we’ve learned by putting it all together.

Using Supplement 1.2, ask students to recall the expectations for being in the group. Then, ask students to
name a few emotions they felt during the class period. You can also use this time to discuss students’
observations and experiences of the focusing activity at the beginning of the lesson.
Sample Script
What are the expectations for being in the group? What are some emotions you felt during this class? What did you notice during the focusing
activity?

Closure

2 MINS.

Close the lesson using a short breathing activity and a reflection on the lesson content. Students may find it

87
helpful to place their hands on their stomachs, just under their ribs, to feel the expansion and retraction when
doing this exercise properly. For background information on this activity, refer to Chapter 4.
Sample Script
Let’s take a moment to regroup. At the end of every lesson, we’ll do a short breathing exercise. This exercise is just a little different than the one we
did in the beginning and will help us end the lesson in a calm place. We’ll also take a moment to think about what we learned today.
Close your eyes or look a point in front of you, and rest your hands in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor. Relax the muscles in your body and
face. Relax and soften your stomach muscles. Counting to 3, take a deep breath in slowly. Inhale the air down into your lungs. Feel your chest and
stomach expand like a balloon. [Pause.] Now, exhale, counting to 4. Feel your chest and stomach collapse as all the air exits your body. [Pause.]
Again, inhale deep into your lungs so that your stomach expands [Pause.] and exhale. [Pause.] Take a moment to think about something you
learned today that was important to you or that you really liked. [Note to instructor: Pause for a moment to allow time for reflection.]
Counting to 3, take one more deep breath in slowly [Pause.] and exhale counting to 4. [Pause.]

Tips for Transfer Training and Homework

Use the ideas and activities in the following section to practice this lesson’s content with your students at other
times during the day. Also, remember to precorrect, remind, and reinforce concepts from this lesson in
activities throughout the school week across settings including home, the bus, the cafeteria, and the
community.

Additional Activities
• Using handheld mirrors or other technology (e.g., photo booth applications), whereby students can look
at their own faces or the faces of others, ask students to model what their faces look like when they
experience an emotion and then look at the face in the mirror or other technology. You can suggest to
students that they do this at home also.
• During the school day, prompt students to identify emotions they are feeling and write them down. Ask
students to think about how the emotion may be acting like a signal.
• Ask students to keep a journal, and prompt them to write in the journal after each lesson or daily.
Students can use the journal for general reflection or for additional skills practice.

Homework Handout

Pass out the homework handout, Supplement 1.7, My Emotions. This homework asks student to identify and
reflect upon emotions. Ask students to answer the questions as best as they can.

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SUPPLEMENT 1.1 LESSON 1: About Strong Kids: Emotional Strength Training

The Limbic System

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

89
SUPPLEMENT 1.2 LESSON 1: About Strong Kids: Emotional Strength Training

Strong Kids Rules

1. Respect others: Listen quietly while someone else is speaking.

2. Come prepared and do your best work: Complete any activities assigned from the last lesson.
Participate in activities as you feel comfortable.

3. Personal information stays in the group: What is talked about in the group stays in the group. Do
not gossip about what other people have shared.

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Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

91
SUPPLEMENT 1.3 LESSON 1: About Strong Kids: Emotional Strength Training

Comment Slip

Name _________________________ Date _________________________

Question/Comment/Concern _____________________________________

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

92
SUPPLEMENT 1.4 LESSON 1: About Strong Kids: Emotional Strength Training

Strong Kids Lessons

Lesson 1: We are introduced to the program, learn the rules of the group, and begin to learn about
emotions.
Lesson 2: There are physical feelings that go along with our emotions.
Lesson 3: There are thoughts and behaviors or actions that go along with our emotions.
Lesson 4: We can learn about other people’s emotions and ways to show empathy.
Lesson 5: We can learn to identify and manage angry emotions.
Lesson 6: We can identify when our thoughts get stuck in thinking traps.
Lesson 7: There are strategies we can use to think about other perspectives in a situation.
Lesson 8: We can learn ways to solve problems and get along with others.
Lesson 9: There are strategies we can use to deal with stress in our lives.
Lesson 10: There are things we can do to live a positive and healthy life.
Lesson 11: We can set goals and do things that will help us lead a healthy life.
Lesson 12: We review the information and skills we’ve learned.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

93
SUPPLEMENT 1.5 LESSON 1: About Strong Kids: Emotional Strength Training

Key Terms and Definitions

Adversity, troubles, and failure
This is a situation or experience that is difficult for you or in which you feel as if you have done poorly.
Examples: Your parents get divorced, your family is having a hard time paying the bills, you’re not
doing as well in school as you’d like to, you wish you had better friendships, or you made a mistake.

Resilience
Bouncing back from difficulties in your life shows resilience.
Example: Something is difficult in your life and you feel sad, upset, or angry. You use some strategies
from Strong Kids and you notice you feel better and know you can get through a difficult time and
bounce back.

Perseverance
This is when you work hard, keeping at it, to reach a goal.
Example: Something in school is a lot of work, but it’s important to you to do your best so you keep
trying. Or maybe you want to play a sport but you make a lot of mistakes. You keep practicing.

Emotion
A feeling that acts like a signal, an emotion gives us information about our situation and ourselves.
Example: Some emotions we may feel are happiness, sadness, fear, disgust, surprise, and anger.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

94
SUPPLEMENT 1.6 LESSON 1: About Strong Kids: Emotional Strength Training

List of Emotions

Other emotions: annoyed, ashamed, brave, calm, cautious, curious, doubtful, ecstatic, guilty, hopeful,
ignored, impulsive, inspired, jealous, lonely, optimistic, peaceful, rejected, relaxed, relieved, scared,
shocked, shy, sorrowful, startled, sympathetic, thankful, upset, withdrawn

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

95
96
SUPPLEMENT 1.7 LESSON 1: About Strong Kids: Emotional Strength Training

My Emotions
Directions: Think of a time when you felt one emotion or several all at once. Use this memory to
answer the next few questions.

1. What was the emotion, or what were the emotions that happened at the same time?

2. Using the circle below, indicate how much of the emotion or emotions you felt. An example is
provided.

3. Where were you? What was the situation?

4. How did you know you felt the emotion or the emotions?

5. How did the emotion or emotions act like a signal? What did it tell you about your situation or
yourself?

97
Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

98
99
 Understanding Your Emotions 1

SEL Competencies Addressed in This Lesson

Teacher Notes

Purpose and Objectives

This lesson provides students with the knowledge and skills to identify physical feelings that occur
concurrently with emotions. In this lesson, students will
• Develop the ability to identify physical feelings that occur with emotions
• Identify emotions on a continuum from comfortable to uncomfortable
• Measure the intensity of emotions

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Materials Needed
Supplements 1.6, 2.1 (online download)
Supplements 2.2–2.4 (online download and handout)
Supplement 2.5 (homework handout)
Optional video of a Ferris wheel

Running Short on Time?

Suggested stopping points: end of Activity C and Closure activity.

Instructor Reflection
Emotions can be experienced in our bodies and may range in feeling from comfortable to uncomfortable.
Emotions also vary in intensity and can change according to context (e.g., If you tripped and fell and there
was no one around, you might feel startled and perhaps a little concerned. But if there were several people
around, you might feel startled and embarrassed). It is valuable for people to get to know their own personal
experience with emotions—there are similarities and differences among us all. To do this, simply notice your
emotional experiences throughout the day, however slight or intense, and consider: What is the emotion? Are
you experiencing several emotions at once? Are there physical sensations occurring at the same time? Is there
comfort, discomfort, or both, and how intense does the emotion feel?

Review

2-3 MINS.
Review the ideas (listed below) that were discussed in Lesson 1: About Strong Kids.
• These are the rules of the group: respect others, come prepared, do your best work, and maintain
confidentiality.
• Identify a person you could talk to if you are having a difficult time.
• We experience a lot of emotions. They act like signals and give us information about our situations,
thoughts, and choices.
Sample Script
During our last meeting, we started the Strong Kids program. We talked about what we will be learning in these lessons and the expectations for
being in the group, and we identified a range of emotions. We also talked about identifying someone you could talk to and how emotions act like
signals.

Introduction

2-3 MINS.

Introduce the lesson. Lead students in a focusing activity. Then, show students Supplement 2.1 and share, via
discussion, that 1) physical feelings are associated with emotions; 2) they can be experienced on a continuum
of comfortable and uncomfortable or both; and 3) they can be measured by their intensity. Allow students
time to respond to the prompt questions.

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 Sample Script
Today we’re going to learn about how we experience physical feelings when we have an emotion.

Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity

2 MINS.
Sample Script
Like last time, let’s begin with an activity to settle our bodies and focus our minds. Close your eyes or look at a point in front of you on the floor or
on your desk. Now, rest your hands comfortably on your desk or in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor or your hands as they rest. Let’s begin by
taking three breaths together, just breathing as we normally do. [Pause.] Now, like last time, focus your attention on how the breath feels going in
and going out. You might feel your chest or stomach move. Maybe you feel like your stomach is filling up like a balloon and then the air is going
out. Just notice what you are feeling. Whatever you feel is okay. We are simply noticing our breath. [Pause.] Describe to yourself what you notice.
You might say to yourself, “I feel cool air going into my nose” or “I feel my stomach moving.” Continue breathing as you normally do, for about a
minute. [Allow students about a minute to practice.] You probably notice that you have thoughts that take your attention away from noticing
your breath. That’s normal. When you notice this, just focus again on your breath. [Pause for three to five breaths.] Now, let’s take two breaths
together. [Pause.] When you finish letting out the second breath, slowly open your eyes. Now that we’ve observed what we feel when we breathe,
we are ready to move on to our lesson.

Introduction (Continued)

1 MIN.

Show students Supplement 2.1 as a visual example, or a video of a Ferris wheel.

Sample Script
Look at this picture [or video] of a Ferris wheel. Maybe you’ve been on this ride at a fair, or maybe you’ve just looked at it. Some people want to
go on this ride because they enjoy the physical feelings they have when they’re on it—they may be relaxed or energized. They might feel the emotion
“excited” or “happy. ” Other people feel sick to their stomach or their bodies feel very tense, either when they’re on the ride or even just looking at it.
They might also feel afraid. Today, we’re going to talk about how our bodies experience or feel emotions and how paying attention to these feelings
can help us.

Key Terms and Definitions

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 2.2 as a handout to define the key terms that will be used in this lesson.
Sample Script
Here are some important terms that will help us understand the information we’ll talk about today. We’ll define the words and discuss examples to
understand what they mean.

Physiological Feelings Associated with Emotions

5-10 MINS.
When we experience emotions, our bodies can feel them too.
Sample Script
When we experience emotions, our bodies can feel them. You might feel the same physical feelings as other people or they might be different. Either
is okay. For example, if your shoulders and arms feel tense, you’re breathing faster, your jaw is clenched, and you feel like yelling, those might be

102
 physical signals that you’re feeling irritated. If your stomach is hurting, your body is shaking, your breathing is more shallow, and your heart is
beating fast, you might be feeling scared. Different people can feel different things, but we all have physical feelings with our emotions. Let’s do an
activity so you can see how your body experiences emotions.

Activity A: Identifying Physical Feelings

4-9 MINS.

Use Supplement 1.6 (List of Emotions, Lesson 1) as a guide. Choose one activity below to give students an
opportunity to practice identifying physical sensations associated with emotions. Examples of emotions and
corresponding physical sensations are listed below the activities.
Sample Script
Let’s practice noticing any physical feelings we may experience when we have an emotion.

1. Play songs or sounds that can evoke emotions (e.g., “Happy” by Pharrell Williams, “Don’t Worry Be
Happy” by Bobby McFerrin). Discuss the emotions students felt and what their bodies were experiencing.
2. Ask students to close their eyes and take three breaths. Instruct them to recall a situation, perhaps being
on the beach, going to a party, or being at their favorite place. Instruct them to imagine where they were
and what they were doing, saying, or thinking. Ask them to notice any physical sensations they detected
related to the emotion and ask them to describe it.
3. Using art supplies, make cue cards with the name of an emotion on one side. Students will write down or
draw the physical feelings on the other side of the card.
Below are example emotions with possible corresponding physical feelings. Students can also suggest other
physical sensations. It can be helpful to prompt students to use creative or less common language to describe
the way their bodies feel in response to emotions, such as “skin feels prickly” as a reaction to irritation or
impatience or “heart feels fluttery and buoyant” in response to excitement or joy.
• Worry: Stomach discomfort, headache, muscles feel stiff, shallow breathing, restless, tired
• Stress: Aches and pains, stomach aches/upset, tense muscles, heart beats fast, shallow breathing, clenched
jaw and face
• Regret and sadness: Tired/fatigued, ache in the chest or heart, lump in throat, stomach upset, general
pain
• Fear: Heart beats fast, breath is rapid, dry mouth, tingling
• Confusion and irritation: Dizzy, head feels fuzzy, body tense and jumpy
• Embarrassment or awkwardness: Face feels warm, body feels warm, heart pounding or beating fast

Experiencing Emotions on a Continuum from Comfortable to

Uncomfortable

5-10 MINS.
Emotions are felt on a continuum from uncomfortable to neutral to comfortable.
Sample Script
Emotions can feel really comfortable, really uncomfortable, and somewhere in between. Really comfortable might feel like, “I love this feeling and I
want to feel this way all the time!” Really uncomfortable might feel like, “Yikes, make it stop! I don’t want to feel this way anymore!” If it’s
somewhere in between, we might not even notice the emotion. One way is not better or more normal than the other way to feel. Depending on the
situation and the circumstances, it can be totally normal to feel comfortable in some situations and uncomfortable in others. Some situations can

103
 even make us feel both comfortable and uncomfortable at the same time. Understanding how we feel gives us more information about ourselves
and our experience.

Activity B: Identifying Emotions on the Continuum of Comfortable and Uncomfortable

4-9 MINS.

Use Supplement 2.3 as a handout to practice identifying and exploring emotions in large or small groups.
Sample Script
Now let’s practice not only identifying emotions and the physical feelings we have, but also whether we feel comfortable, uncomfortable, somewhere
in between, or both comfortable and uncomfortable.

For each example, ask students the following questions:

• What physical sensations give you clues about how you feel?
• What emotions might you be experiencing? (Hint: We can experience more than one emotion at the
same time, and different people can have different experiences.)
• Do you feel comfortable, uncomfortable, or both? (e.g., comfortable: I like feeling that way; uncomfortable: I
don’t like feeling that way; both: I felt uncomfortable but noticed that I felt better after a while.)
Physical feelings and possible emotions experienced for each scenario:

Scenario Physical feelings Possible emotions

1 Heart beating fast, eyes widen, feel frozen Afraid, worried, confused, comforted
2 Tired, stomach is queasy Sad, concerned, worried
3 Breathing faster, sweating Excited, afraid, energized
4 Jump a little, look around, body relaxes Surprised, confused, relieved
5 Restless (getting out of seat), hard to focus Overwhelmed, worried, irritated
6 Calm, excited Happy, confident, relieved, embarrassed

It’s Normal to Feel Discomfort

1 MIN.
Although we’d like to experience the comfortable emotions all the time, it is not realistic or always helpful.
Sample Script
We may want to feel comfortable emotions all the time, but it’s just not possible. Occasionally, we may actually be in a situation that feels
uncomfortable and that feeling can help keep us safe. Dealing with uncomfortable emotions can be difficult, but we learn a little bit about ourselves
every time we feel and pay attention to an emotion, even when it feels uncomfortable. The more we learn about how we react to or handle our
emotions, the stronger we are the next time we feel that emotion. Emotions come and go. If you’re on the Ferris wheel, maybe you feel excited or
scared while you’re on the ride. When it’s over, you might feel disappointed or relieved. The way we feel can change moment by moment, every day,
and that’s okay. In the next lessons, we will learn how to identify ways of feeling and how to manage when we are feeling uncomfortable
emotions.

Measure the Intensity of Emotions

5 MINS.

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Emotions are experienced in levels of intensity; some are barely noticeable, whereas others are very apparent.
Use Supplement 2.4 to illustrate this idea.
Sample Script
The intensity of an emotion, or how much of an emotion we are feeling, can be measured by thinking about a volume slider, like on your phone,
computer, or music player. A volume slider tells us if the volume is off, so you can’t hear anything; somewhere in the middle; or really loud. We can
think this way about our emotions too. Sometimes, we barely feel an emotion and sometimes we feel a whole lot of it! Sometimes, it’s in between.
It’s normal to feel a range of emotion and for that emotion to go up or down over time. Thinking about the intensity of an emotion can give us
more information about our situation and how much or little we are feeling.

Activity C: Measuring Intensity

4 MINS.

Use Supplement 2.4 as a handout for this activity. First, model your own example. Then, use the examples
listed after the sample script to begin a discussion on how to rate emotional intensity. Direct students to the
supplement, and ask them to point to a location on the slider that reflects this measurement. You can also opt
to have students use an object, such as a paperclip or pencil, and move it from side to side or make a mark on
the paper. Finally, ask several students to volunteer to identify situations where they experienced an emotion.
Have the students select a level of emotional intensity for that situation.
Sample Script
Let’s use the slider to describe how much emotion we feel. For example, if you felt only a little irritated, you might point to a spot on the far left. If
you felt extremely irritated, you might point to a spot on the far right. If you think it was in between, you’d point to a place in the middle of the
slider. I’ll go first: I’m thinking of a time when I felt [insert emotion]. I was [insert the situation]. I think my experience of [insert emotion]
was medium on the slider, but I noticed that the intensity of my emotion dropped over time. I noticed in the beginning it felt uncomfortable, but
then it faded and gradually went away. Now, let’s go through a few examples and rate our emotional intensity on the slider. Notice how you
might feel over time. Then, I’ll ask for volunteers to share their own examples.
Here are some example scenarios:
• Taking a test
• Giving a speech
• Passing a test
• Getting a present
• Being ignored by a friend
• Starting winter break
Raise your hand if you’d like to share your own examples.

Putting It All Together

5 MINS.

Use the following activity to practice the concepts discussed in this lesson.
Sample Script
Let’s practice what we’ve learned by putting it all together.

Use the scenarios from Supplement 2.3 and in your own words, lead students in a discussion on the following

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talking points:
• What is (are) the emotion(s)?
• Does the emotion feel comfortable, uncomfortable, or both?
• Think about your emotions as if they were on a volume slider like on your music player or TV. How
intense did the emotions feel?
• What is the emotion telling you about yourself? (e.g., Some emotions I enjoy, others I don’t; I feel it a lot
or a little.)
• What is the emotion telling you about your situation? (e.g., I like/don’t like it. Other people get upset
when I feel that way. I feel like I want to flee/fight/freeze.)
• Twist: If you were in a different situation, would you feel differently? For example, does it matter if you
are alone or with other people? Would you have a different feeling if you were with friends, a teacher, or a
parent? Would your feeling be more intense or less intense?

Closure

2 MINS.
Close the lesson using a short breathing activity and a reflection on the lesson content.
Sample Script
Let’s take a moment to regroup. Close your eyes and rest your hands in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor. Relax the muscles in your body and face.
Relax and soften your stomach muscles. Counting to 3, take a deep breath in slowly. Inhale the air down into your lungs. Feel your chest and
stomach expand like a balloon. [Pause.] Now, exhale, counting to 4. Feel your chest and stomach collapse as all the air exits your body. [Pause.]
Again, inhale deep into your lungs so that your stomach expands [Pause.] and exhale. [Pause.] Take a moment to think about something you
learned today that was important to you or you really liked. [Note to instructor: Pause for a moment to allow time for reflection.] Counting
to 3, take one more deep breath in slowly [Pause.] and exhale counting to 4. [Pause.]

Tips for Transfer Training and Homework

Use the ideas and activities in the following section to practice this lesson’s content with your students at other
times during the day. Also remember to precorrect, remind, and reinforce concepts from this lesson in
activities throughout the school week and to encourage students to use the skills taught in this lesson across
settings including home, the bus, the cafeteria, and the community.

Additional Activities
• During class content that includes literature, history, or current events, infuse a discussion about the
emotions that literary characters, historical figures, or modern-day individuals may have experienced. Ask
students to identify whether the person described emotions by physical feelings, whether the reader could
guess the intensity of the emotion, and whether the emotions were experienced as comfortable,
uncomfortable, or both.
• Ask students to participate in a journaling activity to identify the emotions they experience throughout
the day, the physical feeling associated with these emotions, and their level of intensity. Use the
Homework activity as a guide.
• If your students talk about emotions during class discussions, ask them to describe the physical feelings
that occurred, along with a description of the intensity and their comfort level.

Homework Handout

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Pass out Supplement 2.5, Identifying and Measuring My Emotions. Students are asked to identify situations
in which they feel certain emotions, describe the physical sensations that gave them clues, and estimate the
intensity of the emotion.

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SUPPLEMENT 2.1 LESSON 2: Understanding Your Emotions 1

Picture of a Ferris Wheel

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

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SUPPLEMENT 2.2 LESSON 2: Understanding Your Emotions 1

Key Terms and Definitions

Emotion
A feeling that acts like a signal, an emotion gives us information about our situation and ourselves.
Examples: Irritated, frustrated, angry, content, anxious

Physical feelings
We can have physical feelings when we have an emotion.
Example: If I feel embarrassed, I might feel dizzy and my face might get red and feel warm.

Comfortable
Comfortable feels good or not bad. You might feel like you want to hold on to the feeling.
Example: Spending time with a good friend and listening to music feels comfortable.

Uncomfortable
Uncomfortable feels not good or even bad. You might feel like you want to get rid of the feeling.
Example: You were ignored by a friend who does not return your texts.

Emotional intensity
This is how much or how little of an emotion we feel.
Example: Sometimes we feel a little bit of an emotion, sometimes a lot, and sometimes in between.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

109
SUPPLEMENT 2.3 LESSON 1: About Strong Kids: Emotional Strength Training

Practice Scenarios

Scenario 1: In the hallway, a student starts calling you Scenario 2: You just found out your friend went home
names in a loud voice. Your heart starts beating fast, your sick from school. You’re not sure what’s wrong, but
eyes get wider, and you feel frozen. You wonder if this is a she said she hadn’t been feeling well for a couple of
signal to do something about it or stay quiet. days. You feel tired and your stomach feels a little
Twist: Your best friend is standing next to you and looks queasy.
at you.

Scenario 3: You’re at a friend’s house playing video games.

Scenario 4: You are in front of the school and you
The video game is getting pretty intense and there are hear someone shouting. You jump a little and look
some parts that seem even scary. You are breathing fasteraround, trying to find where the shouting came from.
and starting to sweat. You notice that the bus driver is shouting someone’s
Twist: You enjoy spending time with this friend and know name and has a backpack in his hands. You feel your
that a trusted adult is home that you can talk to if you body relax.
want to about feeling scared.

Scenario 5: You are working on a project that’s due Scenario 6: Your math teacher tells you that you did
tomorrow and you just got started on it at 5 p.m. You’re better on a test than last time. Your body feels calm
not sure where to start and are pretty sure you don’t have and excited. It’s important to you that the teacher
all the information you need. You keep getting up out of noticed how you did.
your chair and you say something mean to your sister. It’s Twist: On the other hand, your teacher said this in
hard to focus. front of other people and you wonder what they think
because they did not get a compliment.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

110
SUPPLEMENT 2.4 LESSON 2: Understanding Your Emotions 1

Emotions Volume Slider

111
Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

112
113
SUPPLEMENT 2.5 LESSON 2: Understanding Your Emotions 1

Identifying and Measuring My Emotions

Name (optional) __________________________________________________

Directions: Think about situations when you feel emotions. What do you feel in your body? Is the
emotion comfortable, uncomfortable, or both? Draw a picture of a volume slider next to each emotion
to show how much of the emotion you feel.

I feel worried when _________________________________________________.

I can tell because ____________________________________________.

I feel lonely when ___________________________________________________.

I can tell because ____________________________________________.

I feel frustrated when ________________________________________________.

I can tell because ____________________________________________.

I feel jealous or envious when ________________________________________.

I can tell because ____________________________________________.

I feel irritated when _________________________________________________.

I can tell because ___________________________________________.

I feel strong when __________________________________________________.

I can tell because ___________________________________________.

I feel confused when _______________________________________________.

I can tell because ___________________________________________.

I feel thankful or grateful when ______________________________________.

I can tell because ___________________________________________.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

114
115
116
 Understanding Your Emotions 2

SEL Competencies Addressed in This Lesson

Teacher Notes

Purpose and Objectives

This lesson teaches students to identify thoughts, emotions, and behaviors; understand the relationships
among them; and increase awareness that people have choices in how they think and act, which can promote
resilience. In this lesson, students will
• Identify thoughts and behaviors that occur with emotions
• Identify behaviors that communicate emotions in helpful and unhelpful ways and understand that the way

117
 we communicate with others may affect our relationships
• Recognize that the way in which emotions are expressed depends on our backgrounds and the context in
which we experience emotions

Materials Needed
Supplement 3.1 (online download)
Supplements 3.2–3.4 (online download and handout)
Supplement 3.5 (homework handout)
Video clips or advertisements (e.g., from magazines) with age-appropriate content, illustrating people or
characters showing emotions, for Activity A

Running Short on Time?

Suggested stopping points: end of Activity B and Closure activity.

Instructor Reflection
Emotions are connected to physical feelings, as discussed in the last lesson, as well as thoughts and behaviors
or actions. For example, if you find yourself thinking, “I’ll never get everything done” (thought) and rushing to
complete tasks or procrastinating (behavior/action), you might suspect that you are feeling “overwhelmed”
(emotion). You might also notice that you are experiencing fatigue or a headache (physical feelings). To
prepare for this lesson, reflect on particular thoughts and behaviors and how these may be connected to
emotions and the physical feelings that may accompany them. What did you feel like doing during these
times? What did you do to express the emotion and cope with it? Consider the emotions that feel difficult or
particularly uncomfortable. Do you tend to hold your emotions inside or let them out? How do you do this?
Under what circumstances would you express the emotions in one way in one situation and in another way in
a different situation? Often, this exercise is best done in the moment—write down your experiences so you can
relate to these ideas and your students’ responses.

Review

2-3 MINS.
Review the ideas (listed below) that were discussed in Lesson 2: Understanding Your Emotions 1.
• Physiological feelings are associated with emotions.
• Emotions can be experienced as comfortable, uncomfortable, in between, or both.
• It is to be expected that we will feel uncomfortable at times, and that is okay; paying attention to this can
help us learn and make us stronger.
• Emotional intensity can be compared to a volume slider on our music player, computer, or TV to help us
understand the strength of our feelings.
Sample Script
During our last meeting, we learned that we experience all kinds of feelings when we have emotions. Sometimes we feel comfortable,
uncomfortable, in between, or both. We also learned that we can measure how intense emotions feel by thinking about a slider on a volume control
to show how much or how little of the emotion we feel.

Introduction

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 1-2 MINS.

Using Supplement 3.1, introduce the lesson, which focuses on how our emotions can be linked with our
thoughts and behaviors. Then, lead students in a focusing activity.
Sample Script
Today, we’re going to talk about how we have thoughts and behaviors when we feel emotions. This picture shows how they all can go together and
how one may affect another. We have choices in how we think and act when we feel emotions, especially when we feel them intensely, like when
we feel really angry, worried, or upset. Understanding these better will help us act respectfully to ourselves and others, no matter what we are
feeling.

Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity

2 MINS.
Sample Script
Let’s begin with an activity to settle our bodies and practice focusing our minds. Close your eyes or look at a point in front of you on the floor or on
your desk. Rest your hands comfortably on your desk or in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor or your hands as they rest. First, pay attention to
your breathing for three breaths. [Pause.] Today, we will focus on the emotions we are experiencing this very moment. Maybe you feel excited,
worried, sad, awkward, or calm. Any emotion is okay and normal to experience. We can sometimes find clues to emotions in our bodies—maybe in
our stomachs, our shoulders, or even our jaws. When you notice an emotion, you can say to yourself, “Hello, worry” or “Hello, happiness” and pay
attention to what it feels like. You can put your hand over your heart to help you connect with your emotions. Let’s take another minute or two to
pay attention to the emotions you are feeling. Remember, if you discover your thoughts wandering, simply bring your attention back to noticing
your emotions. [Allow students about a minute to practice.] Now, let’s take two breaths together. [Pause.] When you finish letting out the
second breath, slowly open your eyes. Now that we’ve observed our emotions, we are ready to move on to our lesson.

Key Terms and Definitions

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 3.2 as a handout to define the key terms that will be used in this lesson.
Sample Script
Here are some important terms that will help us understand how emotions are linked to our thoughts and behaviors. We’ll define the words and
discuss examples to understand what they mean.

Thoughts Are Linked with Emotions

10-15 MINS.

Use Supplement 3.3 as a handout to teach how identifying thoughts can be helpful to understanding
emotions. Use the two examples listed below to teach the concepts. For Activity A, use Supplements 3.3 and
3.4. Instead of Supplement 3.4, you may opt to use appropriate video clips or advertisements that show people
or animated characters having emotional experiences.
Sample Script
Did you know that our thoughts can happen at the same time, before, or after we have emotions? Identifying and watching our thoughts can be
helpful in understanding our emotions. If you’ve ever been trying to focus on something and someone keeps talking loudly, you might think to

119
 yourself, “Stop talking! I can’t think about what I’m supposed to do!” Those thoughts might give you clues that you are feeling irritated and
annoyed.

Example 1: Use the first cartoon in Supplement 3.3 to illustrate thoughts occurring with emotions.
Sample Script
This cartoon shows a person and his or her thoughts, which are written in the thought bubble overhead. Raise your hand and tell me what the
person is thinking. What emotion do you think the person is experiencing based on what he or she is thinking?

Example 2: Using the blank cartoon in Supplement 3.3, write in the “thoughts,” ask students to guess at
possible emotions the person is experiencing, and draw facial expressions to correspond to the emotion(s).
Sample Script
Let’s try another example. Let’s pretend that tonight you have math homework, a science test to study for, and a basketball game. You might be
thinking, “How am I going to get all of this done?” or “I just want to do something fun for a change.” You might say these things to yourself or to a
friend. What emotion or emotions do you think you’re feeling? [Possible responses are stressed, overwhelmed, worried, and discouraged.]

Activity A: Identifying Thoughts and Emotions

5-10 MINS.

Use Supplements 3.3 and 3.4 as handouts. Instead of Supplement 3.4, you can ask students to generate their
own examples or use appropriate video clips or advertisements that show people or characters showing
emotional experiences. You might find videos online or in movies/TV shows. Ensure that content is
appropriate for students’ ages. Choose one activity below to give students an opportunity to practice
identifying thoughts associated with emotions.
Sample Script
Let’s practice identifying our thoughts and emotions with more examples.

1. Students break into pairs or small groups. Students can use the blank cartoon from Supplement 3.3 or
draw their own cartoon. Use Supplement 3.4 as examples or ask students to generate their own examples.
Ask students to imagine and generate ideas regarding the thoughts and emotions the person may be
experiencing. Instruct students to write words in the bubble that reflect what the person may be thinking.
2. Using brief video clips or advertisements that show people or characters displaying various emotional
behaviors that are appropriate to this age group, instruct students to imagine and generate ideas regarding
the thoughts and emotions the character(s) may be experiencing. Students may also role play the thoughts
that they guess the characters are having.

Behaviors and Actions Can Communicate Emotions

5-10 MINS.
Behaviors or actions can tell us or other people that we are experiencing an emotion.
Sample Script
Sometimes, our behaviors or actions can tell us or other people that we are experiencing an emotion. Sometimes, it’s obvious what we’re feeling by
what we say. Sometimes, our body language expresses how we’re feeling. For example, if you sigh really loudly, roll your eyes, raise your voice, or
feel like you want to be alone, you might be feeling irritated or overwhelmed. If you scrunch up your face and say, “Eew! Gross!” you might be
experiencing disgust. If you stand up straight, speak clearly, and say, “No problem. I’ve got it,”you might be feeling confident. All these actions can
be linked to emotions. We can look for clues as to how we’re feeling by how we act.

Activity B: Identifying Behaviors and Emotions

4-9 MINS.

120
Use Supplement 3.4 as a handout, students’ own examples, or the video clips or advertisements you used in
Activity A. For continuity, it is recommended to use the same examples that were used in Activity A. Choose
one of the following activities to demonstrate the ways words and body language communicate emotion.

Sample Script
Now, we’ll practice identifying the behaviors or actions that can go along with emotions. You’ll use the same examples from the last activity and
describe or act out the words, behaviors, actions, or other body language that the person in the example used to convey emotions. Then, talk about
or act out the actions you would use to demonstrate that same emotion or emotions if you were in that situation.

1. Have students break into the same groups as in Activity A. Use Supplement 3.4 or other examples the
students generated from Activity A. For each scenario, instruct students to 1) describe or act out the
words, behaviors, or actions the person may be experiencing that are associated with the emotions and
thoughts in the scenario; and 2) describe or act out the behaviors they would personally show to
communicate the emotions if they were in that situation.
2. Using the video clips or advertisements from the last activity, ask students to 1) identify the verbal and
nonverbal language that conveys the emotion(s) depicted (e.g., the words the person uses, the person’s
activity level, facial expressions, tone of voice) and 2) describe or act out the behaviors they would
personally show to communicate that emotion.

Expressing Emotions with Helpful and Unhelpful Behaviors

5-10 MINS.
Emotions can be expressed in a variety of ways. Some ways of expressing emotion can be helpful to the
situation, whereas others can be less helpful or even hurtful.
Sample Script
Have you ever been in a situation where someone yelled at you, gave you the “silent treatment” by ignoring you, or said something that really hurt
your feelings? Or maybe you showed one of these behaviors to someone else. We can do these things when we feel emotions such as anger,
frustration, worry, and hurt or when we don’t know how to communicate how we feel. Yelling, saying mean things, or giving the silent treatment
can be hurtful to other people and to ourselves. There are a few times when it may be okay to yell at someone—for example, if you are in danger.
But in most cases it’s important to do something else with an intense emotion. We want to have good relationships with other people and we also
want to respect ourselves. We can choose to act in a way that is helpful or respectful or in a way that is unhelpful and disrespectful. With practice,
we can be in charge of how we express our emotions.

Activity C: Identifying Helpful and Responsible Actions

4-9 MINS.

Use Supplement 3.4 as a handout, students’ own examples, or the video clips or advertisements you used in
Activity A. For continuity, it is recommended to use the same examples that were used in Activity A. Choose
one of the following activities to demonstrate the ways in which verbal and nonverbal behaviors communicate
emotion. For the activity chosen, ask students to imagine and identify 1) whether the behaviors were helpful
or unhelpful and respectful or disrespectful to others and/or themselves and the reasons why, and 2) what
could have been done differently to be helpful or respectful and communicate what was wanted or needed?
Sample Script
Now, let’s practice figuring out whether behaviors and actions are helpful or unhelpful and respectful or disrespectful. You will also talk about
anything that might have been done differently to communicate what was needed or wanted in the situation.

121
1. Use the scenarios from Supplement 3.4 or students’ examples.
2. Use the scenarios from the video clips or advertisements.

Responding to Emotions to Match the Situation

5-10 MINS.
The ways we show emotions can be affected by where we are, who we are with, and what we want or need to
get out of a situation. How we show emotions can also be affected by the way we are raised and our cultural
norms.
Sample Script
The ways we show how we’re feeling often depend on where we are and who we’re with. Take, for example, feeling sad. If you’re at home with a
family member or with a friend you trust and you feel sad about something, you might cry or talk about why you feel sad. But if you’re in science
class, you might try hard to not cry and you might keep your thoughts and feelings to yourself. It might feel more comfortable to express yourself in
one place or with certain people. You also might think about what you need or what you want to get from expressing yourself. Do you want to be
listened to? Do you want to keep some privacy? Do you need some support? You might think about how expressing yourself might affect others.
Also, different families express emotions differently—some families talk about their feelings a lot, and others don’t. How you express your emotions
is sometimes related to how your family expresses their emotions.

Activity D: Responding to Emotions to Match the Situation

4-9 MINS.

Use Supplement 3.4 as a handout, students’ own examples, or the video clips or advertisements you used in
Activity A. For continuity, it is recommended to use the same examples that were used in Activity A. Choose
one of the following activities. Ask students to consider how they might express themselves 1) if they were at
home, in the classroom, at the mall, in a restaurant, and/or in other environments that are applicable to the
group; and 2) if they were with friends, teachers, strangers, or their families. Also, ask students for reasons
why they would act the way they would, depending on the situation or who they are with. What do they want
or need in each situation (e.g., to be heard, to be respectful, to hear what others are saying or doing first)?
Please note that different cultures have different norms and expectations for expressing emotion. It may be
beneficial to discuss these differences with your students. Please refer to Chapter 2 for additional guidance and
information on this topic.

Sample Script
Now we’ll think about the ways we express ourselves, depending on where we are, whom we’re with, and what we need or want in the situation.

1. Use the scenarios from Supplement 3.4 or students’ examples.

2. Use the scenarios from the video clips.

Putting It All Together

5 MINS.
Use the following activity to practice the concepts discussed in this lesson.
Sample Script

122
 Let’s practice what we’ve learned by putting it all together.

Choose one or more examples that were discussed in which students might need a little extra practice or
review. Ask students to discuss the talking points listed below.
Sample Script
We’re going to review a couple of the examples we discussed and talk about them in more depth.

• Identify the situation, emotion, thoughts, and behaviors.

• Guess the physical feeling(s) the person may have been experiencing.
• Evaluate whether the behaviors were helpful or unhelpful to the individual or in their relationship with
another person.
• Discuss how the person may have considered contextual or cultural norms.

Closure

2 MINS.
Close the lesson using a short breathing activity and a reflection on the lesson content.
Sample Script
Let’s take a moment to regroup. Close your eyes and rest your hands in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor. Relax the muscles in your body and face.
Relax and soften your stomach muscles. Counting to 3, take a deep breath in slowly. Inhale the air down into your lungs. Feel your chest and
stomach expand like a balloon. [Pause.] Now, exhale, counting to 4. Feel your chest and stomach collapse as all the air exits your body. [Pause.]
Again, inhale deep into your lungs so that your stomach expands [Pause.] and exhale. [Pause.] Take a moment to think about something you
learned today that was important to you or you really liked. [Note to instructor: pause for a moment to allow time for reflection.] Counting
to 3, take one more deep breath in slowly [Pause.] and exhale counting to 4. [Pause.]

Tips for Transfer Training and Homework

Use the ideas and activities in the following section to practice this lesson’s content with your students at other
times during the day. Also remember to precorrect, remind, and reinforce concepts from this lesson in
activities throughout the school week and to encourage students to use the skills taught in this lesson across
settings including home, the bus, the cafeteria, and the community.

Additional Activities
• During the day, you will notice students responding to their emotions in helpful and unhelpful ways.
Provide specific praise when you notice helpful responses. When you notice students engaging in
unhelpful behaviors, ask them, “What do you think you are feeling?” “How can you tell?” “What thoughts
are you having?” and “What do you want out of this situation?” Then, brainstorm alternative behaviors or
actions that are helpful and respectful.
• Encourage students to use their journals to record their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. Students can
reflect on what they needed or wanted in that situation, whether their behaviors were helpful and
respectful, and what they may consider doing differently, if anything.
• During class content that includes literature, history, or current events, infuse a discussion about the
emotional experiences, thoughts, and actions of literary characters, historical figures, or modern-day
individuals. Ask students to speculate what the individuals may have been communicating with their
behaviors. Would they have acted differently in another environment, at another time, or with other
people? Were their behaviors helpful or unhelpful to themselves and others in the short term or the long
term?

123
Homework Handout

Pass out Supplement 3.5, Ways of Showing Emotions. Instruct students to evaluate the situations and
indicate whether the responses were helpful or unhelpful.

124
SUPPLEMENT 3.1 LESSON 3: Understanding Your Emotions 2

Thoughts, Emotions, and Behaviors

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grade 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

125
SUPPLEMENT 3.2 LESSON 3: Understanding Your Emotions 2

Key Terms and Definitions

Emotions
A feeling that acts like a signal, an emotion gives us information about our situation and ourselves.
Examples: Sad, happy, worried, excited, embarrassed, angry

Thoughts
What we think: We have lots of thoughts during the day. You can have thoughts before, after, or
during emotions.
Examples: “I can’t believe she said that!” “I’m not sure what to do about this situation.” “What if I fail
this class?”

Behaviors or actions
What we do or say: We have lots of choices regarding what we do or say when we feel emotions.
Example: Ahmed feels really irritated. He can yell, refuse to talk, or take deep breaths and let the
emotion pass.

Respect/respectful
This is a way of behaving toward yourself or others that shows consideration, thoughtfulness, and
courtesy.
Example: Michael disagreed with what his friend was saying and felt angry. He decided to take a few
breaths and said, “I hear what you are saying. Maybe we should talk about this a little later.”

Disrespect/disrespectful
This is a way of behaving toward yourself or others that shows a lack of courtesy or consideration.
Example: Farah’s room was a mess. It had been a couple weeks since she last cleaned it. There were
clothes on the floor and the trash was overflowing. During dinner, Farah’s mother asked her to clean
up her room that evening. Hours went by and before she went to bed, her mother asked if she’d
cleaned up. Farah hadn’t. Farah snapped at her mother and said, “I’ll just do it tomorrow” and
slammed her door.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grade 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

126
SUPPLEMENT 3.3 LESSON 3: Understanding Your Emotions 2

Cartoon Example

127
Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grade 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

128
SUPPLEMENT 3.4 LESSON 3: Understanding Your Emotions 2

Practice Situations
Situation 1: Your best friend is sitting at the lunch table with someone you don’t get along with.
You’re not sure what to do.
Situation 2: You see a group of your friends at your favorite restaurant. You wonder why you weren’t
asked to go, too.
Situation 3: You are in band and playing a new song. You lose your place in the music, stop playing,
then start again in the wrong place. Someone behind you laughs.
Situation 4: The person sitting next to you in science class asks to see your homework.
Situation 5: Your coach compliments you on the game you played today. This is the first time she’s
given you a compliment.
Situation 6: You were planning on going over to a friend’s house, but when you get home from
school, you find out you can’t go because you have to help clean up the house.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grade 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

129
SUPPLEMENT 3.5 LESSON 3: Understanding Your Emotions 2

Ways of Showing Emotions

Name (optional) _______________________________

Read each sentence and decide whether the student’s response was helpful or unhelpful.

This is a helpful or respectful way to show emotions.

This is an unhelpful or hurtful way to show emotions.

________1. Latisha feels overwhelmed and stressed. She talks to her teacher about how to get
started on her project and what she needs to finish by the end of the week.
________2. Michael is hungry and really tired from being at school all day. He feels irritable. When
he gets home, he yells at his mom when she asks how his day went.
________3. Ling was surprised to find out she didn’t make the soccer team this year. When her
friend asks her if she made it, she snaps, “It’s none of your business!” and walks away.
________4. Eli is having a hard time thinking of what to write about for the language arts
assignment that’s due tomorrow, and he’s feeling stressed. As he’s writing, his pen leaks
ink all over his paper. He bangs his fist on the desk, hurting his hand, and other people
look at him.
________5. Marcella saw her best friend talking to the new girl at school. She’s worried her friend
isn’t going to hang out with her anymore. She takes a couple of deep breaths and
decides she could be friends with the new girl, too.
________6. Ahmed has a stomachache and hasn’t been feeling well all day. He feels a little sad, too.
He thinks he’ll talk to his grandmother tonight and go to bed a little early.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grade 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

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 Understanding Other People’s Emotions

SEL Competencies Addressed in This Lesson

Teacher Notes

Purpose and Objectives

This lesson teaches students to cultivate empathy by identifying with and considering others’ emotions. In this
lesson, students will
• Use context to consider how someone else may be feeling
• Practice taking the perspective of others to develop a better understanding of others’ motivations and
actions

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Materials Needed
Videos of people experiencing an emotion or sharing a personal story
Photocopy of volunteer script for the skit in Activity C
Supplements 4.1–4.3 (online download and handout)
Supplement 4.4 (homework handout)

Running Short on Time?

Suggested stopping points: end of Activity B and Closure activity.

Instructor Reflection
Understanding other people’s feelings can be difficult. With current technology providing an easy alternative
to human interaction, there are lots of ways to avoid interacting with people and lots more mistakes that can
be made when we do! Have you ever had an interaction with another person in which you were not certain
exactly how to read his or her emotion and/or how to react as a result? How did you find out what he or she
was feeling? Once you knew, did you know what to do to support this person in a way that felt right for both
of you? What about the other way around? Have you ever found yourself in a situation in which you were in
need of support but the person you turned to was unable to provide a supportive voice when you needed one?
Think about times you were successful in supporting a friend through a crisis (or when you were supported)
and how the interaction played out. Use those experiences as you support your students while keeping in mind
that in the 21st century, interactions can occur across a variety of platforms.

Review

2-3 MINS.
Review the ideas that were discussed in Lesson 3: Understanding Your Emotions 2.
• Communicate emotions in helpful ways.
• Different people show emotions in different ways and in different situations.
• Thoughts and behaviors are linked to emotions and vice versa.
Sample Script
During our last meeting, we talked about different ways of showing emotions—some helpful and some not so helpful. We talked about how
different people can show emotions in different ways and that where you are, or who you are with, might change the way you choose to show your
emotions. We also said that thoughts can affect how you feel. Well, today we are going to think more about what emotion looks like so we can notice
when other people are feeling certain emotions. This will help us communicate with others in a helpful way.

Introduction

2-3 MINS.
Introduce the lesson. Lead the students in a focusing activity. Then, introduce the concept of empathy and
the intent to understand and better identify other people’s emotions. Allow students time to respond to any
prompted questions you may raise.
Sample Script
Today, we’ll be talking about empathy, which is the ability to understand and share in the feelings of another person. We will talk about noticing
other people’s feelings, about seeing a situation from another person’s perspective, and about what we can do when someone is going through
something.

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Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity
2-3 MINS.
Sample Script
Before we get started with today’s lesson, let’s practice settling our bodies and focusing our minds. Like before, close your eyes or leave your eyes open
and look at a point on the floor or on your desk. Rest your hands comfortably on your desk or in your lap. First, notice your breathing, the feeling of
the air going in through your nose and out through your mouth. [Pause for three to five breaths.] Today, we will act like detectives and take a
few moments to listen with attention and curiosity to the sounds around us. There are all kinds of sounds that we can hear right now. Pay
attention to what you hear. Notice what it is and where it’s coming from, far and near. Let’s listen. [Allow students about 1 minute.] If your
thoughts start to wander, gently bring your attention back to the sounds you hear. [Allow another minute of practice.] Now, let’s take two
breaths together. [Pause.] When you finish letting out the second breath, slowly open your eyes. Now that we’ve listened to the sounds around us,
we are ready to move on to our lesson.

Key Terms and Definitions

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 4.1 as a handout to define the key terms that will be used in this lesson. Use short video clips
or your own examples to illustrate the terms.
Sample Script
Here are some important terms related to understanding other people’s emotions and actions. Let’s talk through these.

Recognizing Other People’s Emotions

20 MINS.
Emphasize to students that making an effort to understand people’s feelings is an important skill that
influences how we interact with others and the relationships we have with others.
Sample Script
The first part of empathy is thinking about how someone might be seeing the situation. Sometimes, that is not obvious. If you’re not sure how
someone sees something or what their perspective is, the best way to find out is to ask, because sometimes people can act and feel differently than you
might expect. Sometimes it’s not possible or appropriate to ask someone how they see a situation, so we look for clues in other places—such as their
behavior, things they say or don’t say, things they’ve told us before, and information we know about the situation in general.

Note: In working through Activities A and B, identify and discuss the behaviors each individual is showing.
Ask, “How can you tell?” or “What did you see?” to encourage students to focus in on the specific cues they
are using to make their identification. If the students are consistently guessing correctly, advance the
discussion by asking students to speculate, “What sort of things could make a person feel that way?” Write
down the students’ examples to use in discussions throughout the remainder of the lesson. If students are not
consistently guessing correctly, reveal the intended emotion and ask, “Would anyone show it in a very
different way?”

Activity A: Identifying and Modeling Emotions

8-10 MINS.

Use Supplement 4.2 to identify emotions using visual cues. Some students are asked to share physical

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emotions and others are asked to identify clues.
Sample Script
Let’s think some more about how some emotions look by using this list like we did in Lesson 2. We’ve discussed some of these already. Some of the
emotions on this list are simple emotions that you might feel any day. But some of them are more complicated and might only occur under certain
circumstances.
Read through the emotions listed on Supplement 4.2, including the terms below the pictures, or ask your
students to take a minute and read through them.
Now I want some volunteers to select an emotion to display. When you have an emotion in mind, put your hand up, and when I call on you, I
want you to name your emotion and show me an example of how it could look if someone felt that way. It doesn’t matter if someone does the same
one as you.
Sample Script
Now, see if you can tell what emotion I am feeling. [Model the emotion “skeptical” (raised eyebrows, smirk, slight head-shake) or another
emotion of your choice.] What emotion do you think that was? [After the emotion has been identified, ask] What kind of things could have
happened to make me feel that way? It may help to think of times you have felt skeptical. [If students come up with another emotion that
matches your expression, be sure to acknowledge how similar some emotions can look, but let them know the exact emotion you had in
mind.]
That was a good discussion about [Skepticism.]. Now, let’s talk about some other emotions using some different scenarios; show me what you
would look like if you experienced: [Use your own example or one of the suggestions below.]
• You put your hand out for a high five, but the person turned away.
• You won an award that you weren’t expecting.
• A favorite actor or actress died.
• You unexpectedly got concert tickets from your parents.
• Someone unfriended you online.
• You found ants all over your bed.

Activity B: Guessing Emotions

5-7 MINS.
Instruct individual students to choose an emotion without telling their classmates what they have chosen and
to model the body language that reflects that emotion. Ask other students to look for clues to help guess the
emotion that is being modeled. Remind students that this is to get them to practice thinking about other
people’s feelings and that it may not be easy to get it right every time. Reiterate that not everyone experiences
or shows emotions the same way.
Sample Script
Now, I need two brave volunteers to show a couple more emotions. You can show us an emotion from this list or you can show us a completely
different emotion. Don’t tell us what the emotion is right away. We are going to try to guess. We’re not always going to get it right—that’s why
we’re practicing how to do this. After we’ve guessed, I would like you to tell us what the emotion was and the reason that caused you to feel that
way. [Ask the volunteers to whisper quietly to tell you, or write down the emotions they are portraying in advance.]

Taking Someone Else’s Perspective

30 MINS.
Students identify physical cues of others and understand someone else’s perspective through role play. A
student volunteer will be needed for a role-play demonstration. Allow time to prepare with the volunteer
student before presenting this activity.
Sample Script
For this next activity, I need one volunteer to pretend to be the corner store cashier. [Allow for a transparent selection process to get a
volunteer for the skit. Step aside briefly to chat with your volunteer about his or her role. Consider conducting this selection and
discussion process in the minutes prior to class.]

Activity C: How Does He or She Feel?

15 MINS.
Role-play the following situation. You (the teacher) will pretend to be a student called Marcella (if female) or

135
Michael (if male). Choose a student to play the part of a cashier. Identify any other roles that might
supplement the scenario for your students. Use physical cues such as frowning, an irritated voice, disappointed
words, or an annoyed look to demonstrate the physical cues that go with emotions.
Sample Script:
Watch as [volunteer student] and I show you a brief skit about a girl called Marcella [boy called Michael]. I want you to think about
Marcella’s [Michael’s] emotions during this skit and see if you can guess how she [he] is feeling. [Volunteer student] is role-playing the cashier
and I will be playing the part of Marcella [Michael]. Afterward, I’m going to ask you some questions about it.

THE CORNER STORE: ROLE PLAY

Background for the Actors: Michael (Marcella) finally has lunch privileges and can go
to the corner store to buy lunch and treats at lunch time. On his (her) first day in the
store, he (she) picks up several small snacks and presents them to the cashier. The
cashier rings it up and announces loudly, “$11.74”! Michael (Marcella) only has $7.13.
There’s a line of older students behind him (her).

Sample Script (Teacher as Michael/Marcella)

[Chatting, laughing, and giggling with the person next to him (her). Feel free to ad lib
to demonstrate how happy you are to be shopping alone!] I can finally buy my own
snacks! I’m getting king-sized candy bars. This is great. Don’t worry, I’ll share with you. Yes, I
can afford it. It’s not that much. [etc.]

Cashier Sample Script (Volunteer student acting as a cashier)

[Option: write an alternate version of this script for the volunteer student ahead of
class.) $11.74, please.

Sample Script (Teacher as Michael/Marcella)

Using body language only, pull out all of your money from your various pockets and
then react to the price as Michael (Marcella) might. Allow the students to discuss your
reaction. [Possible body language for Michael/Marcella: Look at the snacks and the
cashier in silent confusion and disbelief, touch the money again as if to count it. Look at
your friend.]

Cashier Sample Script Do you have it or not? Next.

Next, discuss the following questions with the class:

• What do you think Michael (Marcella) is feeling?
• What did he (she) say or do that led you to that conclusion?
• Why is it important to understand someone else’s perspective?
• What could you do or say if you were Michael’s/Marcella’s friend?
Have you ever felt like Michael/Marcella? If you understood how he/she might feel, and if you felt a bit embarrassed just by watching this skit, you
were taking Michael’s/Marcella’s perspective. You were feeling empathy!

Activity D: Active Listening and Showing Empathy

15 MINS.

Use Supplement 4.3 as a handout to practice active listening skills. In this activity, students will practice active
listening and responding skills. Have students get into three groups. Once the groups are organized and ready

136
to present their scenario to the whole class, start by reading each situation out loud to the class and then
having the designated individual(s) from the group act out the emotion as they choose. In each situation,
encourage discussion around how the students would support that friend. Indicate that action is not always
necessary and that “active listening” is sometimes all that is necessary.
Consider enhancing this activity by introducing the “twist” to allow additional interpretations to unfold.
Or, if time allows, ask if anyone in the rest of the class would have displayed the same emotion in a different
way.
Sample Script
There are two kinds of support we can offer—sympathy or empathy. In both cases, we can show that we are listening to someone by leaning our
body slightly forward and toward the person, by looking at the person’s face and giving them our full attention while they are talking, and by
nodding occasionally. We can also keep a kind expression on our face and repeat to the person what we heard them say when the time is right. For
example, we can say, “So you didn’t have enough money and all your friends were there to see it!” You can also say things like, “I’m so sorry. ”
Empathy takes sympathy a little further by showing how deeply you understand. Usually, this means that something very similar has
happened to you and you really do feel what the person feels when you realize the situation they’re in. You could say, “That happened to me once,
and it was really awkward.” Even if we haven’t been in a similar situation, we can still feel and show empathy by taking another’s perspective, by
imagining what we would feel if we were in their shoes. Let’s practice with more examples. Each of your groups is going to get a different story. I’d
like you to choose one person from your group to be the main character and the rest of you will be acting together as the director to help him or her to
act out the emotion the person might have in that situation. The rest of the class is going to guess the emotion and offer support.

After each group shows their depiction, ask the students the following questions:
• What do you think the main character is feeling?
• What physical cues led you to that conclusion?
• Why is it important to know someone else’s perspective?
• What could you do or say if you were a friend of the main character?
• Were you able to empathize with their situation? Did you feel what they might be feeling?

Twists
Feel free to incorporate the following twists into each situation to add dimension when appropriate.
Situation 1
• Twist 1: How might Farah be feeling if she could tell that the package contained a small trampoline that
she had been asking for?
• Twist 2: How might Farah be feeling if she had just received a lecture from her parents about accepting
gifts from strangers?
Situation 2
• Twist 1: How might Michael feel if his parents had just told him that his messy room could have
consequences and he had laughed?
• Twist 2: How might Michael feel if the deadline for repaying or finding the book is tomorrow?
Situation 3
• Twist: How might Latisha feel if Ahmed encourages her to share the ownership of the proposal?
• Twist: How might Latisha feel if Ahmed told her she could not share in the ownership of the proposal?

Putting It All Together

5 MINS.
Use the following discussion to practice the concepts discussed in this lesson.
Sample Script

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 Let’s practice what we’ve learned by putting it all together.

Use the following talking points to reemphasize the concepts discussed in this lesson.
Sample Script
Let’s review a couple of the examples we discussed and talk about them.

• What is empathy and what is perspective taking?

• Why do you think empathy is important?
• What is the best way to figure out a person’s perspective?
• How would you show empathy differently from sympathy?
• How can we practice developing empathy?

Closure

2 MINS.
Close the lesson using a short breathing activity and a reflection on the lesson content.
Sample Script
Let’s take a moment to regroup. Close your eyes. Feel your feet on the floor. Counting to 3, take a breath in slowly. Inhale [Pause.] and exhale,
counting to 4. [Pause.] One more time, inhale [Pause.] and exhale [Pause.] Take a moment to think about something you talked about today
that was important to you and you really liked. [Note to instructor: pause for a moment to allow time for reflection.] Counting to 3, take one
more deep breath in slowly [Pause.] and exhale counting to 4. [Pause.]

Tips for Transfer Training and Homework

Use the ideas and activities in the following section to practice this lesson’s content with your students at other
times during the day. Also, remember to precorrect, remind, and reinforce concepts from this lesson in activity
throughout the school week.

Additional Activities
• During class breaks or free times, encourage students to look out for students who may need support.
This might be a good time to discuss how empathy relates to bullying. Empathy can act as an antidote to
bullying and spur bystanders to help.
• During moments of sharing in class, encourage other students to listen actively and reflectively and offer
empathetic statements to the person who has shared something personal. Remind students that this skill
takes practice for it to feel authentic and more automatic.
• Prior to receiving a new student in your group or classroom, encourage existing students to reflect on their
first day in a new group and decide on positive and welcoming approaches to share with the new student.

Homework Handout

Pass out Supplement 4.4, Empathy Assignment. Students are asked to respond to questions about times when
they could tell how someone was feeling, the cues they noticed, and what they did to help that person. They
are asked to think of ways they can understand the feelings of someone who they know is having a hard time.

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SUPPLEMENT 4.1 LESSON 4: Understanding Other People’s Emotions

Key Terms and Definitions

Empathy
Empathy is understanding another person’s emotions enough to truly identify with them or even feel
how he or she might be feeling in a situation. Empathy is different from sympathy.
Example: If you have lost a pet, it may be easier to find words from your own experience to say to that
person so he or she knows that you understand the experience.

Sympathy
Realizing that another person is having an unpleasant experience and being willing to comfort or assist
him or her in some way is showing sympathy.
Example: If you haven’t lost a pet, you can still find words to let that person know how sorry you are
that he or she has lost a pet and that you are feeling sad for him or her and are there to help.

Perspective/point of view
This is the feelings and opinions each person has about an experience or during an experience. Taking
someone’s perspective is looking at something from his or her point of view.
Example: If someone tells you a story about times he or she used to spend with a pet, you can visualize
more clearly what he or she will be losing now that the pet is gone.

Social cues
Things a person may do or say give us clues about what he or she may be feeling or thinking during an
experience.

140
Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

141
SUPPLEMENT 4.2 LESSON 4: Understanding Other People’s Emotions

List of Emotions

142
Other emotions: apathetic, grieving, dreading, horrified, confident, hopeful, shy, annoyed, guilty,
proud, calm, content, awestruck, empathetic, relieved, anxious, nervous, vulnerable, ignored, rejected,
neglected, ashamed, infatuated, barely tolerant, reluctantly accepting, horrified but interested,
desperate, mildly interested, lonely, awkward, amused, unsympathetic, judgmental, impatient, proud of
yourself, proud of someone else, invincible, unimportant, invisible, hyper, focused, upset, cranky,
optimistic, pessimistic, pessimistic but hopeful, unfocused

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

143
144
SUPPLEMENT 4.3 LESSON 4: Understanding Other People’s Emotions

Small-Group Student Role-Play Scenarios

Situation 1: You are Farah. Today is Friday. You just received a package in the mail from a name and
address you don’t recognize! Your parents won’t be home until later. Act out how you think Farah
might feel.

Situation 2: You are Michael. Your parents have been asking you to clean out your room for a long
time but you haven’t. Your room is a disorganized mess and you can’t find anything. You just found
out that you have to pay for a library book that you borrowed a very long time ago. If you don’t find it,
your parents will be charged $55 for the cost of the book. Act out how you think Michael might feel.

145
Situation 3: You are Latisha. You are working with Ahmed on a social studies project. The teacher
told you to think of a project that will impact the environment in a positive way for a long time and
develop a proposal for your class to be engaged. The winning team will get the honor of being named
as the founders. You have some great ideas, but Ahmed proposes a superb idea that would be
wonderful for the environment. You really want to be named as co-founder, but you can’t think of a
way to contribute to the proposal. Act out how you think Latisha might feel.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

146
SUPPLEMENT 4.4 LESSON 4: Understanding Other People’s Emotions

Empathy Assignment
Name (optional)__________________________________

Think of two times when you could tell how someone else was feeling.
1.

2.

How could you tell? (What were the cues that you noticed?)
1.

2.

What did you do, or what could you do or say to help that person?
1.

2.

Think of someone who you think might be having a hard time now (do not use his or her real name).
Think of some ways you can understand this person’s feelings and show empathy using the skills you
have learned in this lesson.
1.

2.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

147
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149
 Dealing with Anger

SEL Competencies Addressed in This Lesson

Teacher Notes

Purpose and Objectives

This lesson teaches students to understand their anger and to manage their anger proactively. In this lesson,
students will
• List and describe the steps of an anger model
• Name and describe additional anger management skills
• Develop an awareness of personal anger triggers

150
• Apply anger management skills to situations

Materials Needed
Supplements 5.1–5.5 (online download and handout)
Supplement 5.6 (online download)
Supplement 5.7 (online download and handout)
Supplement 5.8 (homework handout)
Optional: Locate a video depicting anger from onset to management for Introduction section

Running Short on Time?

Suggested stopping points: end of Activity C and Closure activity.

Instructor Reflection
Anger takes some management for everyone. Even the calmest of individuals must use strategies to manage
his or her encounters with anger, sometimes without even knowing it. In preparation for this lesson, think
about your own relationship with anger. Which anger management techniques work well for you and which
don’t? Consider how your management techniques vary depending on the situation you are in. Consider the
things that made you angry when you were the age your students are now and how those things have changed
with time. As you present today’s lesson, keep in mind for yourself and for your students that an important
key to managing anger is understanding how anger operates in a general way and for you personally.

Review

2-3 MINS.
Review the ideas (listed below) that were discussed in Lesson 4: Understanding Other People’s Emotions.
• It is important to consider how other people may feel in certain situations.
• Not everyone shows emotions in the same way.
• It is important to consider other people’s perspectives.
• We can sometimes use clues to understand how a person may be feeling.
• It helps to show empathy when you are interacting with someone who is in a difficult situation.
Sample Script
Recently, we learned about understanding other people’s emotions. We talked about how important it is to consider how other people feel in certain
situations. We talked about ways to determine how they might feel by looking for clues or cues or by asking them, if that is appropriate. We also
discussed that not everyone shows emotions in the same way. We talked about how these skills can help us empathize with others and better
understand possible reasons why people do what they do.

Introduction

2-3 MINS.
Introduce the lesson. If you have any materials (video clips or skits), feel free to use them to introduce the
topic of anger. Then lead students in a focusing activity.
Sample Script
Today, we will be thinking about anger management so that we can be better prepared the next time we feel ourselves getting angry. Being

151
 prepared and knowing what we are feeling helps us make helpful choices or decisions before we get so angry that we can’t think clearly.

Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity

2 MINS.
Sample Script
Before we get started with today’s lesson, let’s practice focusing our minds and calming our bodies. Like before, close your eyes or leave your eyes
open and look at a point on the floor or on your desk. Rest your hands comfortably on your desk or in your lap. Today we will take a few moments
to notice what we are feeling. First, pay attention to your breathing, the feeling of the air going in through your nose and out through your mouth.
[Pause for 3 breaths.] [Note: The remainder of this script is meant to be read at a slow pace, to allow students time to notice each body
part described.] Now, feel your feet on the floor. Notice how the bottoms of your feet feel. [Pause.] Now, move your attention to your legs. Notice
your calves, then your shins. [Pause.] Notice your knees and the backs of your knees. [Pause.] Now, notice the tops and backs of your legs.
Whatever you notice is okay. [Pause.] Move your attention to your stomach, then your back. Notice how your stomach moves when you breathe.
[Pause.] Notice your arms. Feel your fingers, then your wrists. [Pause.] Now pay attention to your elbows, the tops of your arms, and your
shoulders. [Pause.] Notice your neck, then your head. Pay attention to your ears, cheeks, mouth, nose, eyes, and forehead. Maybe you notice air
going in and out of your nose. [Pause.] Now, move your focus to your breath. Let’s take two breaths together. [Pause.] When you finish letting out
the second breath, slowly open your eyes. We are ready to move on to our lesson.

Key Terms and Definitions

2-3 MINS.

Use Supplement 5.1 as a handout to define the key terms that will be used in this lesson.
Sample Script
Here are some important ideas that we will be discussing related to dealing with anger. We’ll define the words and discuss examples to understand
what they mean. Can anyone think of any other words we use to describe anger?

Anger Has a Purpose

10 MINS.
Anger is a natural and necessary emotion. Our anger usually signals us to take notice of a situation. Anger can
sometimes be a signal to us that there is a problem to solve.
Sample Script
Even though we’ve probably all already had experiences that have taught us that anger can sometimes get us into trouble, it’s important for us to
remember that anger can also be a signal that there is a problem that needs to be solved or a decision that needs to be made. As we’ve discussed in
previous lessons, all of our emotions are there for a reason, and even anger can help us understand more about the situation we’re in.

Activity A: Using Anger to Problem Solve

10 MINS.

Use Supplement 5.2 as a handout to discuss the concept of using anger to lead to problem solving. Review the
scenarios in the table. Allow students to respond independently or work in groups to talk about their
emotional reaction to each situation and to respond to the scenarios by providing their potential reactions,
decision-making questions, and possible responses.
Sample Script
Let’s look at a couple of situations where you could possibly become angry, even if these situations don’t really make you mad. Think about the

152
 emotional reaction someone may have if this was something that really bothers him or her. What could this person do, or what questions could he or
she ask to figure out what to do? Then, let’s talk about some of this person’s options. Raise your hand when you have something to say.

Other Emotions Can Combine to Feel Like Anger

10 MINS.
Anger can sometimes be the result of a mixture of other upsetting emotions.
Sample Script
Sometimes, we can feel angry and not know why, even after we’ve looked carefully for the problem. In some of those cases, it could be that we are
feeling a mixture of other upsetting feelings. There are some feelings that are pretty sneaky and can make us feel angry either by themselves or when
they are mixed with other emotions. Some of these feelings are jealousy, fear, embarrassment/shame, sadness, disappointment, frustration,
irritation, hunger, failure, rejection, and being offended/hurt feelings.

Activity B: Identifying and Labeling Sneaky Emotions

10 MINS.
Facilitate a brief discussion about emotions that sometimes feel like anger or that can make you feel angry.
Sample Script
Has there ever been a time where you got angry and it turned out that what you were really feeling was some other emotion or even a combination
of emotions? This is when emotions can be sneaky, because you think you are feeling one way, but in fact it could be a mixture of some other
emotions. For example, if I see my best friend at a movie with someone else, I might feel angry at first. But, if I look closely at what I am feeling, I
might notice other things like fear, sadness, and envy or jealousy over possibly losing this friend.
Raise your hand if you can recall a time when you got angry but later realized that what you were feeling was really based on a different
emotion that made you feel angry.

Anger Can Be Difficult to Manage

13 MINS.
Convey the idea that anger can sometimes be hard to manage and that unmanaged anger for some people can
lead to aggression or unhelpful choices.
Sample Script
Even though anger is a normal emotion with a role to play in our lives, anger can sometimes feel so strong that it can be hard to manage. And
anger can look different in different people. For many people, it’s difficult to make our brains think of any good ideas or choices when we’re feeling
intense anger. If we don’t practice how to manage our anger before we get angry, our brain might lock out the good ideas that could be helpful to us
and leave us with only a few choices, which may not be the best choices. Things like violence, threats, shouting, saying or writing rude or hurtful
things, and ignoring others are some of the choices that we typically consider when we’re really angry—if we’re not aware of how to react in a
helpful or healthy way.
Today, I’d like you to think about yourself when you’re angry. Think about the way you feel, the choices you tend to make, and what you’re
thinking, and see if you can identify anything about your anger that you might need to improve—BEFORE the next time you’re angry. The next
two activities are for you to do alone to think a little more about your own anger patterns.

Note: It is implied that students understand why violence, threats, shouting, saying or writing (online posts or
texts) rude or hurtful things, and ignoring others may not be the best choices. It may be beneficial to discuss
with your students why these are problematic even though they may see these behaviors online, on TV and in
movies, in video games, in their homes, and in the community.

Activity C: Analyzing Choices

12 MINS.

153
Walk your students through Supplements 5.3 and 5.4. Supplement 5.3 is intended to get students thinking
and talking about the specific things that tend to “push their buttons.” Depending on the makeup of your
group, encourage selfreflection and independent work, or offer a safe means of sharing points to discuss. One
of the learning points from this exercise (if done as a group) is that different people can get upset by different
things.
Supplement 5.4 is intended to get students thinking about their own anger patterns and to identify areas
that can be improved. Allow students to take and score their tests and to discuss their results. If your
environment might not allow for students to share comfortably on the topic of their own anger, consider using
this as an opportunity for a general discussion across the concepts.

Understanding Anger: An Anger Model

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 5.5 as a handout to introduce the anger model and Supplement 5.6 to walk through a
scenario. As you walk through the scenario in Supplement 5.6, ask students to identify the different parts of
the scenario as they relate to this anger model. Consider dividing your students into groups to discuss the
consequences of each potential decision and/or behavior.
Sample Script
Anger usually has a few steps to it, even though a lot of times the steps get mixed together and you can’t see them. [Point to the model in
Supplement 5.5.] There’s usually a trigger or event, an emotional reaction, a decision about how to behave and an associated action, and then a
consequence. We will look at example situations and consider consequences of each behavior. Okay, let’s look at the first example of Marcella and
how she got angry. [Read through Marcella’s scenario. Ask the follow-up questions.]

Developing Anger Management Skills

15 MINS.

Use Supplement 5.7 as a handout to introduce skills that can be used to cope with anger. Also use Supplement
5.7 with your students to briefly talk through the strategies that follow.
Sample Script
The way we handle our anger depends a lot on the situation we’re in, who we’re with, and what we hope to get out of the situation. Often, we
handle anger differently when we’re in a comfortable or familiar setting than when we’re in an uncomfortable or unfamiliar setting. Let’s take a
look at some strategies here. [Read through the strategies listed in the supplement and allow a discussion of each one.]

Applying Anger Management Strategies

10 MINS.
Encourage a discussion about triggers and using effective anger management strategies. Ask your students to
volunteer triggers they may have developed from Supplement 5.3, then work together or in small groups to
develop positive scenarios that incorporate strategies that could assist in preempting or correcting the
situation. Encourage students to use these strategies in real-life situations when the triggers occur.
Sample Script

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 Can you think of any triggers that make you really angry and have led you to have an angry outburst in the past? Or perhaps certain situations
cause you to avoid your anger instead of manage it? Let’s think about ways we can use the anger management strategies we’ve learned by talking
about a few things that really annoy us. Take a second and then raise your hand if you want to tell me about something that serves to “trigger”
your anger. I’ll write it on this list and then we can talk about it [in our groups]. [Optional: Some possible triggers if no one wants to share
their triggers are cutting in line; play that leads to someone getting hurt; assuming the teacher treated you unfairly with the assignment
grading.]

Putting It All Together

5-10 MINS.
Use the following activity to practice the concepts discussed in this lesson.
Sample Script
Let’s practice what we’ve learned by putting it all together.

This can be done in large or small groups.

Sample Script
Tell me what you remember about these points.

• Is all anger bad?

• Once you’re very angry, is it easy to control your emotions or difficult to control your emotions?
• What other emotions can sometimes disguise themselves as anger?
• Why do we sometimes make unhealthy or unhelpful choices when we’re angry?
• Did you learn anything new about your anger triggers and how you cope?
• What are some anger management strategies?

Closure

2-3 MINS.
Close the lesson using a brief breathing activity and a reflection on the lesson content.
Sample Script
Let’s take a moment to regroup. Close your eyes. Feel your feet on the floor. Counting to 3, take a breath in slowly. Inhale [Pause.] and exhale
counting to 4. [Pause.] One more time, inhale [Pause.] and exhale. [Pause.] Take a moment to think about something you learned today that
was important to you and you really liked. [Note to instructor: Pause for a moment to allow time for reflection.] Counting to 3, take one
more deep breath in slowly [Pause.] and exhale, counting to 4. [Pause.]

Tips for Transfer Training and Homework

Use the ideas and activities in the following section to practice this lesson’s content with your students at other
times during the week. Also, remember to precorrect, remind, and reinforce concepts from this lesson
whenever possible across settings.

Additional Activities

• Support students who may face some of their triggers (lunch, during passing, difficult assignments) by
suggesting anger management strategies whenever possible. For example, if a student frequently gets into
conflict with peers during lunch, first identify some strategies from Supplement 5.7 that could work for

155
 him or her. Then, before lunch, remind the student to use the strategies.
• Post the list of anger management strategies (Supplement 5.7 or another version that you like) in a visible
location, and encourage students to think about the consequences associated with their actions, either
before or after using the strategies.
• During the school day, point out any positive anger management strategies used by characters in fictional
and nonfictional materials.

Homework Handout

Pass out the homework handout, Supplement 5.8, Anger Management Worksheet, and explain the
instructions. Students describe an experience where someone was angry and they apply that situation to the
anger model. Then, discuss anger management skills that could be used. Students may find it helpful to use
Supplement 5.7 when doing this assignment.

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SUPPLEMENT 5.1 LESSON 5: Dealing with Anger

Key Terms and Definitions

Anger
This is a powerful emotion of extreme unhappiness and dislike toward someone or something when
you feel threatened or harmed.
Example: I feel angry when someone uses my things but doesn’t return them or returns them broken.

Aggression
This is using hurtful words or inappropriate physical behaviors toward people or things.
Examples: Hitting, screaming, breaking things, kicking, and slamming doors can be signs of aggression.
Sometimes, even things people write can be considered aggressive, such as online bullying.

Anger management
Having an understanding of your anger triggers and how you tend to react when you are angry will
help you manage anger.
Example: Choosing appropriate/helpful behaviors when you are angry is the key to anger management.

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(Emotional) reaction
An action or a feeling after some event, an emotional reaction is the most immediate response.
Example: My parent asks me where I’ve been and I stiffen in fear because I’m worried about what will
happen to me when I say I was with my friends instead of at baseball practice.

Response
This is the information you provide when someone asks a question.
Example: Someone asks me where I’ve been and I answer in words or in some other way (e.g.,
pointing).

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

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SUPPLEMENT 5.2 LESSON 5: Dealing with Anger

What Problem Does My Anger Want Me to

Solve?

Situation where you feel angry Example emotional Decision-making questions Possible
reactions responses

Another student in class always You want to tell him, Does he know he does it? Find a way to
blurts out the answers before you “Shut up,” even though you approach him.
get a chance to figure it out for know that will get you into
yourself. trouble.

You want to stop trying to What can I do ahead of time? Talk to the
figure out the answer. teacher about it.

You want to cry. What can I do instead to Study harder

prevent myself from feeling and try to be
frustrated when he does blurt faster than him.
out answers?

Someone vandalized some art You want to cry. How can I help the teacher Provide a
you had displayed at school. make displayed art more recommendation
secure? to the teacher.

You want to accuse Ask to have your

someone. art removed.

You think your art wasn’t

all that good, so it probably
deserved to be ruined.

Here are some more scenarios to think through:

1. Some people were roughhousing or playing around in line and caused you to drop your phone and it
broke.
2. Two other students have asked to start volunteering at the front desk. Until now, you had been the
only one who was interested, but now it’s become popular and you have to sign up on a waiting list
to get your preferred time.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

159
SUPPLEMENT 5.3 LESSON 5: Dealing with Anger

How Much Does This Bother You?

Read through the following items and decide how much each one would bother you. Use the scale
below to decide which one best describes your feeling.

a. This doesn’t bother me at all. All I feel is _____________.

b. This doesn’t bother me much.
c. This only bothers me sometimes.
d. This bothers me frequently, but I handle it well, and mostly no one knows.
e. This bothers me frequently, and I get very angry.
f. This always bothers me, and sometimes I’ve gotten into trouble for my anger about it.

1. Having to stop a fun activity to do something serious

(a) _____________ (b) (c) (d) (e) (f)

2. Getting bad grades

(a) _____________ (b) (c) (d) (e) (f)

3. Being teased by my friends

(a) _____________ (b) (c) (d) (e) (f)

4. Being teased by people I don’t really know

(a) _____________ (b) (c) (d) (e) (f)

5. Getting privileges taken away

(a) _____________ (b) (c) (d) (e) (f)

6. Being compared to my older brother or sister or to other people in my class

(a) _____________ (b) (c) (d) (e) (f)

7. Making mistakes
(a) _____________ (b) (c) (d) (e) (f)

8. Some other things that can really make me angry are

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

160
161
SUPPLEMENT 5.4 LESSON 5: Dealing with Anger

What Does MY Anger Look Like?

Read each of the items below and decide how closely it describes your anger. When you have finished,
count how many of each score you have. Did you have lots of 3s? Did you get low scores for Questions
2 and 3? When you think about your answers, what does it tell you about your anger? Is there anything
you would change about the way you get angry?

Use the slider scale below each question to answer.

0 Yes, this is true.

1 This mostly describes me.

2 This is only sometimes true.

3 No, this is not true for me.

1. It takes me a while to get angry after something happens.

2. I tend to get quiet and distant when I’m angry. I mostly think angry and sad thoughts, but I don’t
do much of anything.

3. I tend to blame myself for things that make me angry.

4. I usually return to a better mood pretty quickly after being angry.

5. I usually forget about the incident soon after it is over.

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6. If I do something that I feel bad about while I’m angry, I usually apologize easily.

7. I don’t get angry that often.

8. I can usually explain clearly what made me angry.

9. I’m usually satisfied with how I handle situations that make me angry.

Some other ways I may behave when I’m angry are

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

163
SUPPLEMENT 5.5 LESSON 5: Dealing with Anger

Anger Model

Trigger Emotional reaction Action Consequence

The event or situation The emotion you have because of the situation; What you decide to do What
that can cause a person sometimes the emotion you have right away when you realize that a happens as a
to feel a particular may be different from the emotion you have particular situation is result of what
emotion like anger after you’ve thought about it. making you angry you decided
or did

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

164
SUPPLEMENT 5.6 LESSON 5: Dealing with Anger

Marcella’s Problem

Scenario Part of anger model?

Yesterday, Marcella was struggling with a problem that she felt she couldn’t talk to
anybody about, but her best friend convinced her to tell him and promised he would
keep it secret. Marcella just overheard two people talking about it!

Marcella feels her stomach twist. She knows that the only person who could have
told them is her best friend.

Decision/action Consequence

At first, Marcella considers not talking to her friend anymore to

make sure this never happens again.

After a while, she decides to just find him and ask him if he did tell
anyone and why.

What should Marcella do if he admits that he did tell someone else?

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

165
166
SUPPLEMENT 5.7 LLESSON 5: Dealing with Anger

Anger Management Skills and Strategies

Strategy Description

Notice and acknowledge that you feel anger. Simply notice what anger feels like in your body.
You are a human being, and it’s normal and expected to
feel anger. Tell yourself, “Oh, I’m feeling angry. Okay.”

Ask yourself why you’re angry (problem solve). See if you can determine a problem to be solved.
See if there are any sneaky emotions leading you to feel
angry.

Use if-then statements to consider the consequences. As you are deciding what to do, ask yourself, “If I do
______, then what will happen?”

Count up to or down from 10. Quietly count up to or backward from 10 in your mind.
This could give you just enough think time to make sure
your first idea is a good idea.

Listen to another person. Really listen to someone, either a friend or the person
with whom you’re upset. Use empathy to better
understand why that person might be doing what he or
she is/was doing.

Focus on your breathing. Concentrate on breathing deeply in through your nose

and out through your mouth so that your stomach
moves. Breathing this way can often help people who
are angry begin to calm down. For a few minutes, just
breathe and feel the anger in your body. Do this without
getting lost in your thoughts or running stories about
the situation.

Take a walk or step away. Walking away from a situation that is making you angry
can sometimes prevent you from reacting too quickly
and can give you some time to think clearly about
choices you can make.

Give yourself good advice (self-talk). Give yourself advice such as, “Stop and breathe deeply
for a few minutes before you decide what to do” or
“Remember to take his or her perspective and use
empathy.” Use positive self-talk.

Look for the humor. If there is no danger, picture the situation as a scene in a
comedy and see if you can laugh at yourself. Be sure not
to make fun of someone else.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

167
168
SUPPLEMENT 5.8 LESSON 5: Dealing with Anger

Anger Management Worksheet

Name (optional) ____________________________________

Directions: Describe a recent situation that you might have witnessed or been a part of that involved
someone becoming angry. You can change the names of people that you would prefer not to talk about.
This could have been a TV show. Be sure to include each step of the anger model in your description.

Trigger:

Emotional reaction:

Decision and action:

Consequence:

Directions: Using the anger management skills you have learned, indicate the skills that could have
been used in the situation you described, and discuss how they could have been used. (Use Supplement
5.4 as a guide for identifying anger management skills.)

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

169
170
 Clear Thinking 1

SEL Competencies Addressed in This Lesson

Teacher Notes

Purpose and Objectives

This lesson teaches students an awareness and understanding of common thinking traps. In this lesson,
students will
• Understand the influence of thoughts on emotions and behaviors
• Develop an awareness of their own thoughts
• Identify common thinking traps that affect behavior, thoughts, and emotions

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Materials Needed
Supplements 6.1–6.2 (online download)
Supplements 6.3–6.4 (online download and handout)
Supplement 6.5 (online download)
Supplements 6.6–6.7 (online download and handout)
Supplement 6.8 (homework handout)
Optional props (dark glasses, binoculars, and fortune cookie)
Activity C sheet (volume slider)

Running Short on Time?

Suggested stopping points: end of Activity B and Closure activity.

Instructor Reflection
This lesson identifies thought patterns that can lead to overly pessimistic thinking and hinder well-being. In
this program, these thoughts are called “thinking traps.” We all fall victim to thinking traps sometimes. At
times, thinking traps help us deal with our situation in the moment or help us feel better about the situation in
the short term, without really dealing with the problem or helping us see alternative or more realistic
perspectives. To help you prepare for this lesson, see if you can identify some of the thinking traps in this
lesson. Have you noticed these thinking traps in your own life? If so, what were the consequences? Did they
affect your emotional state, your behaviors, and your interactions with others?

Review

5 MINS.
Review the ideas (listed below) that were discussed in Lesson 5: Dealing with Anger.
• Anger is a necessary and a natural reaction.
• There are different ways to deal with angry feelings.
• Refer to the steps of the anger model.
• There are healthy strategies for expressing anger.
Sample Script
During our last meeting, we talked about ways to deal with your anger—what it looks like, what we do or say when we feel angry, and healthy
ways of dealing with anger. We have a lot of choices for how we respond when we feel angry. We learned that, a lot of times, it helps to take a
moment to think about our angry feelings before we do anything about them.

Introduction

5 MINS.

Introduce the lesson. Lead students in a focusing activity. Then, show students Supplement 6.1 and discuss
how people have emotions and thoughts and how we can sometimes fall into thinking traps.

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 Sample Script
Today, we’re going to learn about the thoughts we have when we experience emotions.

Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity

3 MINS.
Let’s begin with an activity to settle our bodies and practice focusing our minds. Close your eyes or look at a point in front of you on the floor or on
your desk. Rest your hands comfortably on your desk or in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor or your hands as they rest. First, pay attention to
your breathing for three breaths. [Pause] During this activity, you may notice that your mind wanders when you are trying to pay attention to
one thing. It’s okay and normal that your thoughts wander. For the next minute or two, focus on your breath. When you notice your attention
wandering to your thoughts, you can say to yourself, “Oh, I’m thinking” and then bring your attention back to your breath. [Allow students
about 2 minutes to practice.] Now, let’s take two breaths together. [Pause.] When you finish letting out the second breath, slowly open your eyes.
Now that we’ve observed our breathing and thoughts, we are ready to move on to our lesson.

Introduction (Continued)

Show Supplement 6.1 first, followed by Supplement 6.2. This activity illustrates that how we think about a
situation can affect our emotions and behaviors.

Sample Script
[Show Supplement 6.1.] This is a picture of a snake. Imagine holding this snake in your hands. You can feel the weight of its body and cool skin
on your hands. Notice your thoughts. What thoughts do you have when you imagine holding this snake? [Ask students to share their thoughts,
and seek a range of answers. They might find it interesting and wonder what kind of snake it is. Or they might recall memories about
snakes.] Now, notice your feelings. What feelings do you have? [Ask students to share their feelings, and seek a range of answers. They
might feel excited, scared, or disgusted. Then, lead them to make connections between their thoughts and feelings.] If I have bad
memories about snakes or I don’t like the way they look, then I might feel disgusted or repulsed by the thought of holding the snake. However, if I
find them interesting, I may feel excited or happy to hold the snake. [Show Supplement 6.2.] This is a person who studies snakes. How might she
feel to hold the snake? [Allow some speculation about how the scientist might feel.] This is like everything in life! How we think about
something can affect how we feel about it. Today, we will learn how our thoughts can affect our emotions and how we behave. In this lesson, we’ll
learn ways to be more aware of our thoughts and identify thoughts that might not be very helpful or healthy for us.

Key Terms and Definitions

5 MINS.

Use the Supplement 6.3 handout to define the key terms that will be used in this lesson.
Sample Script
Here are some important terms that will help us understand how our thoughts are connected to our emotions and behaviors. We’ll define the words
and discuss examples to understand what they mean.

Thoughts Associated with Emotions

5-10 MINS.

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Use Supplement 6.4 as a visual aid. You can use the supplement as a handout or use the board to write down
thoughts. Recognizing our thoughts helps us understand our emotions.
Sample Script
When we feel emotions, we have thoughts that go with those emotions. Sometimes, we don’t even notice what we are thinking and feeling because
it happens so quickly, or we get used to certain feelings and thoughts. Or our thoughts and feelings can be an automatic reaction based on
experiences we’ve had in the past. It’s important to pay attention to both our feelings and our thoughts. With awareness and practice, we can get
really good at noticing our thoughts and feelings. Then we can better understand how they can affect the way we act. This understanding can help
us feel better, make better friendships, and enjoy our lives more!

Activity A: Thoughts Associated with Emotions

5 MINS.

Using Supplement 6.4 as a visual aid, ask for volunteers to share three to five thoughts and emotions. An
example is provided in the sample script. To help your students understand this connection, you might share
an example from your own life. Using Supplement 6.4, model your thoughts, self-talk, and feelings. You can
use the board to write down student responses and draw connections between the thought and the emotion.
Sample Script
Let’s take a closer look at this. Think of a time when you felt embarrassed or awkward. What kinds of thoughts did you have? What kind of self-
talk did you have? Did your thoughts and self-talk lead you to feel more embarrassed or more awkward? Or your thoughts might have led you to
feel another emotion, like anger. Maybe your thoughts helped calm you down and manage intense emotions. Who would like to share another
example?

Identifying Thinking Traps

15 MINS.

Use Supplement 6.5 as a visual aid. Sometimes, the way in which we think about a situation is not always
accurate and can lead to a trap.
Sample Script
Thinking traps are thoughts or patterns of thoughts that are either inaccurate or unrealistic interpretations of events. They can trap us and make
us feel even worse or make the situation worse. They can lead us to feel like this person you see here, stuck in a trap! But, if we better understand
these thinking traps, we can affect the way we feel about something. We can also change the way we react to something. Today, we will discuss
eight common thinking traps.

Activity B: Identifying Thinking Traps 1

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 6.6 as a handout to guide students in an explanation of common thinking traps. Consider
using one of the examples from Activity A to begin the discussion. Provide students with the opportunity to
ask questions for each thinking trap.
Sample Script
Sometimes, these thinking traps feel like they happen without us even noticing them until we’re right in the middle, or stuck. But if we practice

174
 noticing these traps, we can get better at spotting them early, before we get too stuck. Let’s look at the different thinking traps we might fall into
from time to time.

Activity C: Identifying Thinking Traps 2

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 6.7 as a handout and the optional props (e.g., dark glasses) to discuss the eight situations.
Ask students to identify which thinking trap is being demonstrated by referring to the Common Thinking
Traps handout (Supplement 6.6). Read each situation aloud, and encourage students to follow along on the
overhead. After reading each situation, ask, “Which of the thinking traps is occurring in this story?” If
students identify more than one thinking trap, lead them to the best answer, but also explain that we can get
stuck in more than one trap at a time. Provide feedback as needed.
Note: If your students are struggling, provide other examples that are directly relevant to them.
Alternatively, ask them to come up with examples of their own.
Sample Script
Let’s talk more about thinking traps. In your handout, there are example situations and we will identify the thinking trap in each situation. For
example, Marcella made a little mistake in math class. She thought this little mistake was a HUGE deal. Class, what thinking trap is it if I feel
like a small mistake is a big problem? [Binocular vision: You may choose to use the binoculars.] But Marcella didn’t recognize that it was a
trap, so she was still stuck! At the end of the class, she felt like the WHOLE class went HORRIBLY. She ignored the good things that happened.
She ignored what she did well! Class, what thinking trap is it if I see only the bad things about something? [Dark glasses: You may choose to
put on the dark glasses.] Yes, Marcella got stuck in dark glasses ALL day. As she was getting ready for bed, she thought, “Tomorrow’s math class
will be horrible, too.” Class, what thinking trap is it if I predict something without enough evidence? [Fortune telling: You may choose to
bring out your fortune cookie.]
So you see? If I didn’t realize my thoughts were a trap, and I believed them, they could cause me to feel grumpy for days! How do you think
the thinking traps of binocular vision, dark glasses, and fortune telling [show props] affected how Marcella acted with her friends that day? Her
family? How do you think she acted in math class the next day?

Putting It All Together

5-10 MINS.

Use the following activity to practice the concepts discussed in this lesson.
Sample Script
Let’s practice what we’ve learned by putting it all together.

This activity uses the Supplement 6.8 homework handout and can be completed in small groups. If using
small groups, have each group identify a note taker and a leader; the rest of the members are helpers. The
members in the group can take turns being leaders and note takers until everyone has a chance being a leader
and a note taker. The leader identifies a situation where he or she got stuck in a thinking trap. Leaders can
also use situations they saw on television of someone stuck in a thinking trap. For each thinking trap, the
helpers ask the leaders the following eight questions. The note taker records the answers.
1. What was the situation? What happened?
2. What were your emotions and physical feelings?
3. Was the emotion comfortable, uncomfortable, or both?
4. Where was the emotion on the slider?

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5. What were your thoughts and self-talk?
6. What was your reaction?
7. What thinking trap were you stuck in?
8. Did your situation get better or worse?

Closure

2 MINS.
Close the lesson using a brief breathing activity and a reflection on the lesson content.
Sample Script
Let’s take a moment to regroup. Close your eyes and rest your hands in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor. Relax the muscles in your body and face.
Relax and soften your stomach muscles. Counting to 3, take a breath in slowly. Inhale the air down into your lungs. Feel your chest and stomach
expand like a balloon. [Pause.] Now, exhale, counting to 4. Feel your chest and stomach collapse as all the air exits your body. [Pause.] Again,
inhale deep into your lungs so that your stomach expands [Pause.] and exhale. [Pause.] Take a moment to think about something you learned
today that was important to you or you really liked. [Note to instructor: Pause for a moment to allow time for reflection.] Counting to 3,
take one more deep breath in slowly [Pause.] and exhale counting to 4. [Pause.]

Tips for Transfer Training and Homework

Use the ideas and activities in the following section to practice this lesson’s content with your students at other
times during the day. Also remember to precorrect, remind, and reinforce concepts from this lesson in
activities throughout the school week and to encourage students to use the skills taught in this lesson across
settings including home, the bus, the cafeteria, and the community.

Additional Activities
• Ask students to be on the lookout for evidence of thinking traps they see on television shows or in books
they may be interested in.
• Ask students to journal and record their thoughts and self-talk for a day or several days. Ask them to
identify patterns and traps. Use the supplements in this lesson as guides.
• Have students make flash cards with the thinking traps and images on one side and example scenarios on
the other side.

Homework Handout

Pass out Supplement 6.8, Practice Situations Worksheet, and explain the instructions. Students will list
situations where they got caught up in a thinking trap or they saw someone on TV get caught in a thinking
trap. They will identify the thinking trap.

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SUPPLEMENT 6.1 LESSON 6: Clear Thinking 1

Picture of a Snake

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

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SUPPLEMENT 6.2 LESSON 6: Clear Thinking 1

Picture of a Herpetologist

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Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

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SUPPLEMENT 6.3 LESSON 6: Clear Thinking 1

Key Terms and Definitions

Thoughts
These are ideas or opinions in the mind.
Example: The thoughts we have about something can affect how we feel about it and how we react to a
situation. If I think something will be fun, like a bike ride, I am likely to feel more comfortable about it
and seek it out. If I think something will be boring or too difficult, I may not feel comfortable about it
and I may avoid it.

Self-talk
The things we say to ourselves, self-talk can be negative, positive, or neutral.
Example: Self-talk can be helpful or encouraging (e.g., “I can do this!”) or discouraging (e.g., “I can’t
believe I said that. That was a dumb thing to say”).

Thinking traps
These are thoughts or patterns of thoughts that are either inaccurate or unrealistic judgments or
interpretations of events.
Example: “My sister is always messing up. She can’t do anything right.” This is inaccurate and an
unrealistic interpretation. Just like no one is perfect, no one messes everything up.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

181
SUPPLEMENT 6.4 LESSON 6: Clear Thinking 1

Picture of a Thought Bubble

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

182
SUPPLEMENT 6.5 LESSON 6: Clear Thinking 1

Picture of a Man Trapped in a Hole

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

183
184
SUPPLEMENT 6.6 LESSON 6: Clear Thinking 1

Common Thinking Traps

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Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

186
SUPPLEMENT 6.7 LESSON 6: Clear Thinking 1

Example Situations
1. Michael’s parents are getting a divorce. He thinks that this is all his fault because he has been
getting into trouble lately.

2. Farah’s teacher suggested that she run for class president. She decided not to run because she knew
that no one would vote for her.

3. Marcella got a bad grade on a quiz. Now she thinks that she is the worst student in the class.

4. Ahmad’s soccer coach gave him a lot of praise and encouragement in soccer practice. As Ahmad was
leaving practice, the coach mentioned that Ahmad should practice his dribbling skills at home.
Ahmad was upset about how poorly he played at practice.

5. Ling was grounded for not cleaning her room. She thought to herself, “I am always the bad kid. My
sister Kimmy is always the good kid.”

6. Latisha got in trouble because she shoved another student in the hallway. She doesn’t think she
should be in trouble because the other student gave her a mean look.

7. Caroline lost her favorite pet. She feels like no one else knows what it’s like to lose something they
care about.

8. Scott tried a Mexican dish once and thought it was too spicy, so he didn’t like it. Now he thinks all
Mexican food is too spicy.

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Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

188
SUPPLEMENT 6.8 LESSON 6: Clear Thinking 1

Practice Situations Worksheet

Name (optional) ____________________________

Directions: List four situations where you got stuck in a thinking trap. For each trap, write down the
emotion you experienced; where on the volume slider your emotion was; if the emotion was
comfortable, uncomfortable, or both; what the thought was; and the name of the thinking trap. You
can also use situations you saw on television of someone stuck in a thinking trap.

Emotions Volume Slider

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

189
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 Clear Thinking 2

SEL Competencies Addressed in This Lesson

Teacher Notes

Purpose and Objectives

This lesson provides students with the skills to evaluate thought patterns, consider alternative views, and
reframe thinking traps. In this lesson, students will
• Develop the ability to notice or observe thoughts
• Understand the importance of identifying thinking traps early, before they accumulate or become
ingrained patterns

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 Discriminate healthy thought patterns that promote resilience from thought patterns that may be less
•
helpful and hinder social and emotional growth
• Learn and apply techniques to reframe thinking traps

Materials Needed
(Optional) Props for thinking traps: Binoculars, dark glasses, and fortune cookie
Supplements 7.1–7.2 (online download)
Supplements 7.3–7.4 (online download and handout)
Supplement 7.5 (online download)
Supplements 7.6–7.9 (online download and handout)
Ruler or object used to measure (for Supplement 7.7)
Supplement 7.10: Reframing Thinking Traps (homework handout)

Running Short on Time?

Suggested stopping points: end of Activity B and Closure activity.

Instructor Reflection
The Clear Thinking 2 lesson teaches students to evaluate their thought patterns and reframe thinking traps.
Consider the unhealthy or less-than-helpful thought patterns you may have identified from your own life in
the previous reflection section. How did they affect your emotional state? Did they gain momentum and get
worse? Did you act on them? At the time, did you recognize that the thought pattern was a trap? If so, did
you avoid getting ensnared in the thoughts by objectively reframing the thoughts and allowing them to pass
by? If not, how might you reframe similar traps in the future?

Review

2-3 MINS.

Review the ideas (listed below) that were discussed in Lesson 6: Clear Thinking 1.
• Thinking about our thoughts
• Different thinking traps: binocular vision, dark glasses, black-and-white thinking, fortune telling, making
it personal, the blame game, all alone, broad brush (Use Supplement 7.1 to review the thinking traps.)
• The connection between our thoughts and our emotions that produces thinking traps
Sample Script
During our last meeting, we talked about different thinking traps. By identifying thinking traps, we can keep them from becoming bigger
problems that could affect the way we feel and the way we act. Also, avoiding getting caught up in traps can help us think clearly, get out of a bad
situation, or make a situation better.

Introduction

193
 2-5 MINS.

Introduce the lesson. Lead students in a focusing activity. Using Supplement 7.2, lead students through the
introductory script. Consider using or showing the props—binoculars, fortune cookie, and dark glasses—to
enhance the introductory discussion.
Sample Script
We all fall into thinking traps sometimes, so it’s important to know when we are in one and how to get out.

Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity

3 MINS.
Sample Script
Let’s begin with an activity to settle our bodies and practice focusing our minds. Close your eyes or look at a point in front of you on the floor or on
your desk. Rest your hands comfortably on your desk or in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor or your hands as they rest. First, pay attention to
your breathing for three breaths [Pause.] Now, turn your attention to your thoughts. Do you notice that you can have a lot of thoughts in a very
short time and they can jump all over the place? Thoughts are like clouds in the sky. They change shape all the time. Let’s pay attention to our
thoughts for a minute or two. Like a scientist watching clouds, notice the thoughts and when they change. Notice if there is a type of thought that
keeps coming back. [Allow students 1–2 minutes to practice.] Now, let’s take two breaths together. [Pause.] When you finish letting out the
second breath, slowly open your eyes. Now that we’ve paid attention to our thoughts, we are ready to move on to our lesson.

Introduction (Continued)

Sample Script
If we don’t realize we’ve made an error in the way we are thinking about something, our thoughts can keep getting worse and worse as time goes
on. One wrong thought can lead us to another wrong thought, and everything can move quickly while it’s getting worse along the way! This is
kind of like a snowball rolling down a hill and collecting more and more snow and getting bigger and bigger as it goes. When this happens [Show
Supplement 7.1.], things can feel worse than they actually are. Remember Marcella, who made a mistake in math class and got stuck in the
binocular vision thinking trap? [Show binoculars.] She thought this little mistake was a HUGE deal. She didn’t recognize that she was stuck in
this trap and it made her gloomy all day. She was wearing dark glasses. [Show dark glasses.] At the end of the day, she was stuck in the fortune-
telling trap. [Show fortune cookie.] She was so upset that she predicted that the next day would be horrible, too. One thought can lead to another
and another and pretty soon we are REALLY stuck.
In today’s lesson, we will learn how to avoid getting stuck in thinking traps, how to spot when we are getting caught in a thinking trap, and
what to do if we do get caught in a thinking trap. Today, we will learn how to consider different ways of thinking about things. Also, we will
learn that just because we think something doesn’t mean it’s true or that we need to act on it. We could simply identify the thinking trap for what
it is—a trap!

Key Terms and Definitions

5 MINS.
Use Supplement 7.3 as a handout to define the key terms that will be used in this lesson.
Sample Script
Here are some important terms that will help us understand ways to see traps and to consider other ways of thinking. We’ll define the words and
discuss examples to understand what they mean.

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Recognizing Thinking Traps

5 MINS.
We can recognize thinking traps by examining our thoughts and by looking for the evidence that supports or
does not support them. Use Supplements 7.4 and 7.5 to illustrate and discuss emotional intensity and
evidence.
Sample Script
How do we know when we’re stuck in a thinking trap? When we think about our thoughts and our self-talk like we do with our emotional
volume slider [Show Supplement 7.4.] and realize that we are having strong, uncomfortable emotions about a thing or things that haven’t
happened yet except in our heads, we could be in a trap. Remember how we figured out how to tell how other people might be thinking and feeling
by looking for clues if we couldn’t ask? Well, we can be our own thought detectives [Show Supplement 7.5.] like in this picture showing a
detective looking for more information. When we are feeling down, worried, anxious, or angry, we can use evidence to find out if we are in a
thinking trap. Evidence is information or clues that can help us find out if something is true or realistic or not. When you look closely for evidence
about certain thoughts, you will find that some thoughts are true because they are based on something realistic. For example, you may have worried
or anxious thoughts about failing a test. [Show Supplement 7.4 to identify an intense feeling.] Is it realistic to think you might fail a test if
you did not study? [Class responds, “Yes.”] So, even though you feel uncomfortable, that’s not really a trap because your emotions are telling you
to study next time, right? But what about if you HAVE studied everything the teacher told you and practiced and prepared thoroughly but you’re
still having thoughts like, “I’m going to fail this test!” Is that a realistic thought? [Probably not.] You might be caught in a thinking trap. Can
anyone tell me what the trap might be called if we are predicting the future without first looking for good evidence? [Fortune telling.]

Activity A: Looking for Evidence to Find Thinking Traps

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 7.5 as a handout to discuss using evidence to examine our thoughts. Help students
understand the process of identifying a thinking trap using evidence to determine if the thought is realistic.
Review each situation, asking the following questions:
• What is the thought?
• What is the evidence?
• How do I know that it’s true or realistic?
Sample Script
We tend to think our thoughts are the truth, but sometimes they’re just thoughts that we made up from other thoughts. Sometimes, our thoughts are
worrying or planning thoughts. Sometimes, our thoughts judge or criticize ourselves or others. Sometimes, we have random thoughts that we can
simply let pass by like the clouds in the sky.
Let’s practice evaluating our thoughts by looking for evidence. Sometimes, evidence supports our thoughts, and sometimes it doesn’t. That’s
how we can figure out if we’re in a thinking trap. Remember, we talked about looking for evidence or clues to help us understand how other people
might feel. We can do the same with ourselves!

Using Evidence to Find and Reframe Thinking Traps

25 MINS.

In a large group, use Supplement 7.6 as a handout to demonstrate that there may be different ways of looking

195
at the same situation.

Activity B: Finding Evidence

5 MINS.
Ask students to get out a ruler or other object for measuring purposes. Sometimes, emotions can interfere
with clear thinking and problem solving. We can use evidence to begin to change how we think about a
situation, and that can change our emotions and our reactions to the situation. Let your students know that
once they find evidence that they may be in a thinking trap, they can begin working to reframe the thoughts.
Sample Script
Did you know we can change the way we think about a situation by using evidence? Remember, just because we have a thought, that doesn’t
mean it is true! Sometimes, strong emotions like anger can keep us from thinking clearly. Sometimes, we just don’t have all the facts.
Our brains can play tricks on us in lots of different ways and convince us that something is true even when it’s not. For example, when we
first look at these pictures, we may think the first middle circle is larger. But let’s examine the evidence to find out whether this is true. [Use a
ruler or small object to measure the middle circle.] What did you find? Right, they are the same size even though they look different!
Sometimes, just like this, our thoughts and self-talk can lead us to believe things that aren’t necessarily true. Sometimes, our emotions are so strong,
they affect our thoughts in such a way that we aren’t able to problem solve very well. If we know this about our thoughts, we can avoid getting too
caught up in them when things start to feel uncomfortable. Instead, we can look for evidence to consider different ways of thinking about things.
Remember from our last lesson that Ling was grounded for not cleaning her room. She thought to herself, “I am always the bad kid. My sister
Kimmy is always the good kid.” How does she know she might be in a trap? [Elicit responses that suggest that the use of words like always or
never often lead us into traps.] What can she do? She can look for evidence that shows that she does many things well, too. She could also look for
evidence that her sister Kimmy makes mistakes sometimes, too. “Well, I guess Kimmy makes mistakes just like me.” Class, what thinking trap was
Ling stuck in? [Black-and-white thinking.] Yes, Ling now sees the trap for what it is and thinks, “No one is always good or bad. In fact,
Kimmy and I do a lot of things well, but we both make mistakes, too. I was thinking in black and white.” After examining the evidence, and
seeing things more clearly, Ling feels better and can climb out of that trap!

Activity C: Reframing Using Evidence

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 7.7 to guide students through the process of using evidence to consider different perspectives
or ways of thinking or reframing. Reframing means looking at things differently or from another perspective.
As a result of reframing, you may feel differently about a situation and often you can get out of a thinking
trap. Read the examples aloud.
Sample Script
Sometimes, when we find we are in a trap, the evidence can help us to look at something from a different angle and consider other ways of
thinking about things. This is called reframing. Reframing is a way of looking at something differently—from a different perspective. Think
about the circles we just looked at. The first middle circle just seems bigger because of how it is framed by the other circles. We can reframe things in
life, too. For example, we could look at a situation that isn’t going well as if it is a problem. Or, we could reframe it and see it as a challenge or an
opportunity to problem solve.
For example, if I’m told I didn’t make the basketball team, I might think about that as a sign that I’m no good and I should give up. Or, if I
feel strongly about playing basketball, I could think about that as a challenge to get even better. In fact, some famous basketball players got really
good doing just that! It’s exciting to think how reframing can give us more power over our own lives. We can choose how to think about things and
then how we react to them! Here is how it would look if we wrote it down. In your handout, there are some example situations. Let’s take a look.
[Show and discuss Supplement 7.7.]

Activity D: Reframing Thinking Traps

15 MINS.

Use Supplement 7.8 and the following list of questions to discuss how to use methods of reframing.

196
Encourage students to think about times they suspected they were caught in a thinking trap. If your students
are having difficulty providing examples, start the discussion by providing some examples from your own life
or examples that are relevant to your students. The examples they come up with will be used for discussion.
Once a list of scenarios is generated, facilitate a discussion. Ask the following questions:
1. What was the thought?
2. What evidence did you have that tells you it might be a thinking trap?
3. Was it a thinking trap?
4. What was the thinking trap?
5. How could it be reframed?
Sample Script
Let’s practice using evidence to find thinking traps and reframing our thoughts using our own examples.

Putting It All Together

5-10 MINS.

Use the following activity to practice the concepts discussed in this lesson. Ask students to take out their
homework assignment or the Putting It All Together activity from Lesson 6, and use Supplement 7.9 as a
handout. In small groups, students will work to see how identifying thinking traps and reframing can be useful
in everyday situations. If there is time, ask for volunteers from the class to role-play some of the examples.
Sample Script
Let’s practice what we’ve learned by putting it all together. When should we use evidence to examine our thoughts? We can think about our
emotions by using an imagined slider. We can use this image in our minds to figure out how close we might be to being in a trap. If our emotions
are medium and getting higher, and we feel uncomfortable, it’s time to check and see if perhaps we’re just caught in a thinking trap. Or, if we
notice we are thinking similar uncomfortable thoughts over and over again, it could be a trap. We can use these clues to start looking for evidence
behind our thoughts. Then, we use our facts or our evidence to spot a thinking trap. If we think it is a trap, we can try to reframe the thought by
seeing if there is a different way to think about it or a different explanation for it. We are going to use the activity [or homework] you did last
time when we talked about how to identify thinking traps. This way, we can use our own examples to practice reframing.
In your small groups, identify a note taker and a facilitator or leader like we did last time. The rest of the group members are helpers. Go
around your group and take turns being facilitators or leaders and note takers. The leader identifies a situation when he or she got stuck in a
thinking trap. The helpers suggest ways to reframe the thinking trap. The note taker records the answers to the questions.

Closure

2 MINS.
Close the lesson using a brief breathing activity and a reflection on the lesson content.
Sample Script
Let’s take a moment to regroup. Close your eyes and rest your hands in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor. Relax the muscles in your body and face.
Relax and soften your stomach muscles. Counting to 3, take a breath in slowly. Inhale the air down into your lungs. Feel your chest and stomach
expand like a balloon. [Pause.] Now, exhale, counting to 4. Feel your chest and stomach collapse as all the air exits your body. [Pause.] Again,
inhale deep into your lungs so that your stomach expands [Pause.] and exhale [Pause.] Take a moment to think about something you learned
today that was important to you or you really liked. [Note to instructor: pause for a moment to allow time for reflection.] Counting to 3,
take one more deep breath in slowly [Pause.] and exhale counting to 4. [Pause.]

Tips for Transfer Training and Homework

197
Use the ideas and activities in the following section to practice this lesson’s content with your students at other
times during the day. Also remember to precorrect, remind, and reinforce concepts from this lesson in
activities throughout the school week and to encourage students to use the skills taught in this lesson across
settings including home, the bus, the cafeteria, and the community.

Additional Activities
• Create a class poster (e.g., Mr. Juan’s class doesn’t get stuck in traps!) with the thinking trap icons and
sample scenarios from students’ lives.
• Flip that thought! Provide scenarios that students can reframe, such as the difficult situation that is
reframed as a challenge. Make a “before” and “after” reframing list. In the discussion, talk about ways
thoughts, feelings, and behaviors might be different in the before and after scenarios.
• Create or modify an existing board game to include using evidence to identify thinking traps, reframing,
and avoiding thinking traps (extra moves) and getting caught in thinking traps and allowing them to
snowball (losing a turn or moving backward).

Homework Handout

Pass out the homework handout, Supplement 7.10, Reframing Thinking Traps. Explain how to fill in the
columns. Encourage students to identify at least two events for the chart. Remind the students not to identify
whom they are referring to in the homework.

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SUPPLEMENT 7.1 LESSON 7: Clear Thinking 2

Thinking Traps
Binocular vision
Looking at things in a way that makes them seem bigger than they really are
Example: You’re invited to a beach party. It will be lots of fun, but you don’t want to have to wear a
bathing suit and that is all you can think of.

Black-and-white thinking
Looking at things in only extreme or opposite ways (e.g., thinking of things as being good or bad,
never or always, all or none, friend or enemy)
Example: You feel irritated because you think your friend never makes mistakes. You feel like you are
always the one who messes up.

Dark glasses
Thinking about only the negative parts of things
Example: You don’t like school. When you think about it, all you can think of is the mistakes you make
and the problems you have with your teacher.

Fortune telling
Making predictions about what will happen in the future without enough evidence
Example: You didn’t do well on an art project. Now you think you will not do well in art in high
school.

Making it personal
Blaming yourself for things that are not your fault or making things about you when they are not
Example: Your basketball team lost an important game. You think you let everyone down, and you feel
like it’s your fault.

Blame game
Blaming others for things that are your responsibility
Example: You waited until the night before a group project was due to work on the project. They
couldn’t help you get the materials you needed, and you got a bad grade. You’re angry with your group
members.

All alone
Thinking you have problems that no one else understands
Example: You have difficulty making friends. You think you are the only one who has difficulty with
this.

Broad brush
Judging something based on one experience with it
Example: You tried soccer and found it to be difficult. Now you think that you are bad at all sports.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

199
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SUPPLEMENT 7.2 LESSON 7: Clear Thinking 2

Picture of a Snowball

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

201
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SUPPLEMENT 7.3 LESSON 7: Clear Thinking 2

Key Terms and Definitions

Evidence
Clues that help you find out if something is true or realistic, evidence can give you information to help
you solve a problem. We can use evidence to help us figure out if our thoughts and self-talk are realistic
or logical or if they are distorted.
Example: Using the scientific method, a scientist uses evidence to help solve a problem. Detectives use
evidence, like fingerprints, to solve a crime.

Reframing
This is looking at things differently or seeing things from another perspective; using reframing, you can
change the way you think and feel about things.
Example: We can use reframing to see a difficult situation as a challenge rather than a problem.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

203
SUPPLEMENT 7.4 LESSON 7: Clear Thinking 2

Emotions Volume Slider

204
Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

205
SUPPLEMENT 7.5 LESSON 7: Clear Thinking 2

Picture of Looking for Evidence

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

206
SUPPLEMENT 7.6 LESSON 7: Clear Thinking 2

Looking for Evidence to Reframe

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

207
SUPPLEMENT 7.7 LESSON 7: Clear Thinking 2

Evidence for or Against

Thought What is the evidence? Is it realistic?

A For? Against?

My friend never chooses Over the past week, He comes over to my If he hated me, he
me when it’s time to whenever we’ve played house on the weekends. probably would not want
choose sides for dodge dodge ball, Michael has He laughs at my jokes. He to spend any time with me
ball. He hates me. not chosen me for his is really serious about or even talk to me.
team. dodge ball. I’m not.

B For? Against?

I am such an awful dancer. All of the other students I cannot predict the future. The team leader has some
I will never make the are catching on to the I can’t be good at very specific requirements
dance team. I’m never dance steps. I keep falling. everything, and there are for someone who makes
good at anything. I have failed both tryouts. other things that I am the team, and, so far, I
better at. have not been able to do
them. It is reasonable to
expect that I might not
make the dance team this
time around. There are
other activities I can join
instead.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

208
SUPPLEMENT 7.8 LESSON 7: Clear Thinking 2

Reframing Thinking Traps Examples

What was my thought? What thinking What is a more realistic way of thinking about it
trap did I get (reframe)?
stuck in?

My friend never chooses me when it’s Black-and-white Michael probably knows that I don’t really like to
time to choose sides for dodge ball. He thinking play dodge ball, so he picks other people who like
hates me. to play.

I am such an awful dancer. I will never Fortune telling If I don’t make the dance team, I still have other
make the dance team. things I can do.

Everything at home is bad. Dark glasses Some things at home seem bad right now, but
there are some good things, too.

It’s awful that I fight so much with my Binocular vision Most of the time I don’t fight with my dad, just
dad. sometimes.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

209
SUPPLEMENT 7.9 LESSON 7: Clear Thinking 2

Reframing Thinking Traps Using Evidence

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

210
SUPPLEMENT 7.10 LESSON 7: Clear Thinking 2

Reframing Thinking Traps Worksheet

Name (optional) _______________________________________

Directions: Identify two situations in your life right now where you might be doing some unhelpful
thinking that you would like to change. Use the questions at the top of the chart to help you identify
the thoughts and reframe these thoughts.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

211
212
 Solving People Problems

SEL Competencies Addressed in This Lesson

Teacher Notes

Purpose and Objectives

This lesson provides students with ways to have healthy, positive relationships with others by making
responsible, respectful, and realistic decisions when confronted with a social conflict. In this lesson, students
will
• Learn ways to be aware of one’s actions and maintain a healthy attitude
• Distinguish between helpful and unhelpful decision-making strategies to resolve conflict

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• Identify and apply the steps of a problem-solving model to resolve conflicts

Materials Needed
Supplement 8.1 (online download)
Supplements 8.2–8.4 (online download and handout)
Supplement 8.5 (homework handout)

Running Short on Time?

Suggested stopping points: end of Activity A and Closure activity. When continuing the lesson, begin with
the Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity found in the Introduction section and the introduction to the four-
step problem-solving model.

Instructor Reflection
Disagreements are a natural part of life, so it is important to consider how we handle them. Take a few
minutes to reflect on the conflicts you’ve had with others in the past and the actions you took to try to solve
the problem. It may be helpful to write down a few notes to help you process this information. Thinking
about your past conflicts, did you act quickly or take your time? Did you listen? Did you use effective
communication skills? Did you look for information to better understand the situation? Did you consider a
variety of solutions or look at potential outcomes to various actions? Did you notice an urge to act or retreat
from the conflict? How did you feel about your behavior toward the other person? What roadblocks did you
have in solving the conflict? Did your actions improve the situation?

Review

2 MINS.
Review the ideas (listed below) that were discussed in Lesson 7: Clear Thinking 2.
• Recognizing thought patterns
• Distinguishing healthy thought patterns that promote resilience and thought patterns that may hinder
emotional well-being
• Eight thinking traps (binocular vision, black-and-white thinking, dark glasses, fortune telling, making it
personal, blame game, all alone, broad brush)
• Using evidence to reframe thinking traps
Sample Script
During our last meeting, we discussed measuring the intensity of our emotions using an intensity scale, considering that intense or uncomfortable
emotions may suggest that we are in a thinking trap, and using evidence to reframe thinking traps.

Introduction

5-8 MINS.

Introduce the lesson. Lead students in a focusing activity. Show students Supplement 8.1 as an introductory

214
activity, and discuss what is happening in the pictures and how it is important to reflect on how both parties
may feel as well as potential solutions.
Sample Script
Today, we will talk about ways to make responsible, respectful, and realistic decisions when confronted with a social conflict. We all have conflict
or disagreements from time to time. Sometimes, it can be difficult to find agreement in a way that is reasonable, fair, and acceptable to everyone.

Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity

2 MINS.
Sample Script
Let’s practice settling our bodies and focusing our minds. Close your eyes or look at a point on the floor or on your desk. Rest your hands
comfortably. Feel your feet on the floor or your hands as they rest. Notice your breathing for three breaths. [Pause for 3 breaths.] Now, think
about a person who has been nice to you or you know cares about you. Can you picture them in your mind? Think about what this person has done
for you or said to you that was kind. [Pause.] Notice how you feel when you think of this person. You might feel grateful or thankful that you have
him or her in your life. You might feel like smiling. [Pause.] You can think kind thoughts toward this person by saying to yourself, “I am wishing
you happiness” or “I am wishing you good health.” Use your own words and say them to yourself while you think about the kindness this person
showed you. We’ll do this for about a minute. [Pause.] Now, let’s take two breaths together. [Pause.] When you finish letting out the second
breath, slowly open your eyes. We are ready to move on to our lesson.

Introduction (Continued)

1 MIN.

Show Supplement 8.1, which shows pictures of two people arguing. Choose Picture A or B for discussion. If
there is another opportunity to discuss this topic, you can use the other picture for discussion.
Sample Script
What is happening in this picture between these two individuals? Some things that we want to think about while looking at this picture are what
they are arguing about; what the end result might be based on what this picture shows; do they seem calm; when they walk away, do you think
they’ll feel like their emotions or needs were heard and met? When we are in a situation with another person and we are not getting along or don’t
agree, it is important to stop and think about how we are feeling, how the other person is feeling, and how we are reacting. Remember, in earlier
lessons we talked about being aware of our emotions, how our emotions can affect our ability to make helpful choices, and the importance of taking
the perspective of another person. We will come back to this picture again and talk about how we can resolve the problem in a way that is
acceptable for everyone. Today, we will talk about a skill called problem solving or conflict resolution. This is an important skill to practice so that
we can be prepared to make responsible and realistic decisions when we are in conflict with another person. Being able to stop and consider ways
we can manage our emotions is important so that the conflict gets resolved in a way that is agreeable and shows respect for everyone involved.

Key Terms and Definitions

5 MINS.
Use Supplement 8.2 as a handout to define the key terms that will be used in this lesson.
Sample Script
Here are some important terms that will help us understand problem solving or conflict resolution. We’ll define the words and also discuss examples
to understand what they mean.

Maintaining a Responsible and Respectful Attitude During Conflict

215
 5-8 MINS.
Convey that everyone approaches conflict and views situations differently, but it’s important that we make
responsible decisions and show respect for ourselves and others in our behaviors.
• Everyone is different. Everyone will not always think, act, or feel the same way in a situation. (Refer back
to the lesson on understanding other people’s feelings to help deepen understanding.)
• Your attitude (e.g., being optimistic or pessimistic) can affect how you respond in a disagreement and
your ability to be responsible and respectful toward others.
• You can have multiple thoughts and feelings and emotions at varying levels of intensity in a conflict (refer
to the volume slider as needed).
Sample Script:
Thoughts, emotions, and attitude will vary depending on the situation we’re in or the person or persons we are disagreeing with. This is okay.
There isn’t just one feeling, thought, or attitude or one way of doing something. But no matter the level of our emotions, remaining respectful and
responsible can help us make choices and decisions that are helpful in the long term. Sometimes, when we feel angry or frustrated, we can react
immediately or act without thinking of the consequences. We can say or do something that we regret or that makes the situation worse. We can be
either pessimistic (someone who sees the worst or most unfavorable aspect of a situation) or optimistic (some-one who is hopeful or sees a favorable
aspect of a situation) in our attitudes. Let’s think back to the picture we saw earlier when we started the lesson about the two individuals
experiencing a conflict. Remember the questions I asked you to keep in mind? Think about them as we are going through this lesson.

Activity A: Being Respectful, Responsible, and Aware of Our Attitudes in Communication and
Listening
5 MINS.
Students will engage in a discussion about activities they enjoy with a partner or small group while practicing
communication skills through listening and asking questions. Model active listening and respectful
communication such as, “Thank you for sharing that! It sounds like you really enjoy [activity]” or “I liked how
you showed interest and respect by listening, looking at the person, and asking questions.” Encourage students
to show respectful and responsible behaviors by offering compliments to those who have shared. Be aware of
students’ attitudes and physical demonstrations of listening. (Note: Consider cultural norms for attentive and
active listening.) Then, have students discuss a school situation in which peers may have had a conflict. Ask
students how they can use helpful communication skills in such conflicts.
Sample Script
Let’s explore how we can use communication skills through listening and asking questions. Being respectful and responsible while being aware of
our attitude are essential to good communication and listening skills. For example, someone approaching conflict with a negative attitude versus
someone approaching a situation with a more optimistic attitude can affect the choices that are made to resolve the situation. Now, I’d like us to
discuss a topic that we might all have different attitudes about [e.g., what we each like to do for fun or on the weekends]. Sometimes, when a
person really enjoys something, he or she will use words like “This is epic!” You might disagree and say so. It doesn’t mean that you are intending to
cause a conflict by saying what you think, but it is just a way of sharing a perspective. Let’s see if we can have a conversation about things that we
enjoy that are different among us, and we can practice communication skills by listening and asking open-ended questions like, “What do you like
about that activity?” When you have finished talking in your small group, we are going to share some of the words or actions that you noticed your
classmates using during the discussion that conveyed respect for differing views. Then, with your partner, come up with situations at school that
may cause conflict between individuals, and discuss how respectful communication skills can be used.

A Closer Look at Key Terms and Definitions: Conflict

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 8.1 to review the key points listed below. Then, ask students to discuss ways in which they
would resolve that conflict.

216
• Not all conflicts are bad. They can be neutral or good. Conflicts can help us understand how we feel
about a situation and that not everyone may feel the same way, which is normal.
• Conflicts are inherent in the human experience, and we can learn from conflicts.
• Conflict does not have to end with a “winner” and a “loser.” The aim is to end the conflict with all people
feeling respected and reasonably satisfied with the outcome.
• Conflict can range in intensity level depending on the situation, setting, and individuals involved. For
example, a school conflict with a peer during a group project can look very different from a conflict with a
parent at home who has taken away your weekend privileges.
Sample Script
Conflicts or disagreements can be uncomfortable, but they are not necessarily bad. They are a natural part of life and they even help us learn
strategies to problem solve. In fact, they can be opportunities to learn about oneself and another person’s perspective. Disagreements do not have to
end with one person being right and one person being wrong. Sometimes, there is no particular right or wrong answer to the issue. Conflicts can be
resolved by respecting other people’s views, agreeing to disagree, or compromising. Conflict resolution strategies can help solve our problems or
disagreements one step at a time. For example, think about the picture I showed you earlier with the individuals arguing. [Refer to Supplement
8.1, Picture A or B.] Make up a few ideas about what could have been happening between these people to cause them to experience such intense
emotions. Let’s think about what you would do to resolve this situation if you were involved in that conflict.

Twist: Would the individuals have the same conflict or react in the same way if they were in class or if
someone got physically hurt in that situation?

Options to Conflict Resolution: What Can I Do?

5-10 MINS.
There are many options to solving conflicts.
Sample Script
There are many respectful, responsible, and realistic ways to resolve conflicts. In this context, realistic means that the decision makes sense for the
situation. For example, Sergei and his best friend like the same girl and both are interested in asking her to the school dance. Sergei suggests that he
saw her first because they are in the same math period, so he should get to ask her to the dance. However, Sergei’s friend feels that he should get to
ask her. Is Sergei being respectful, responsible, and realistic? Now, we’re going to talk about helpful options for solving conflict, such as in Sergei’s
situation.

Activity B: Conflict Resolution

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 8.3 as a handout to discuss different options for conflict resolution. Have students review the
list of options in Supplement 8.3 and share and discuss in small groups when these options might be used.
You can post the list in your classroom for a visual reminder.
Sample Script
When you are in a social situation that is difficult or uncomfortable, that is beginning to escalate into a conflict, it helps to look at the situation as if
you were a third person observing it and ask yourself these questions: What is the issue exactly? What does person A need, and what does person B
need? What are the options to resolve this conflict? Here are some options to keep in mind that can help you. [Show and review the list of
options in Supplement 8.3.] Can anyone share if they’ve used any of these? Did it work to resolve your conflict?

Four-Step Problem-Solving Model: Introduction

1 MIN.
The problem-solving model is a way to attempt to resolve disagreements one step at a time. Conflicts are

217
challenging, and it takes patience and creativity to use problem-solving strategies! Sometimes, thinking traps,
thinking only of ourselves, or not being able to take others’ perspectives can hinder effective problem solving
and keep us from achieving a workable compromise.
Sample Script
Sometimes, conflicts can seem confusing and impossible to resolve because people involved may be angry; their emotional intensity may be “high” on
the volume slider. Intense emotions make it difficult to figure out the exact nature of the conflict, and it may make you want to just not deal with it
at all or to give the other person the silent treatment. Ignoring conflicts may seem to work in the moment, but in the long run, the problem is not
being dealt with in a helpful, honest way. Instead of dealing with the issue, you are just pushing it aside. For example, if you don’t do your laundry
and it piles up more and more, it will become overwhelming and will take more of your time to wash. We will learn how to look at a problem in
small steps, particularly when the situation may be really frustrating or seem confusing. By doing this, we can be better prepared to make helpful
decisions and come to a solution that is agreeable to everyone.

Four-Step Problem-Solving Model

20 MINS.

Use Supplement 8.4 as a handout to discuss the steps to problem solving. Remind students that they can
reference this table to help them remember the steps.
Sample Script
There are four steps we can use to solve a problem. We’re going to practice these steps with example situations. Using the steps will help us come to a
helpful solution. It can be difficult to use this problem-solving model in the heat of a moment or in the midst of a conflict—when our emotions are
high on the volume slider. By practicing the steps when we are not feeling strong emotions, we will be better prepared to use these steps when we
may not be thinking as clearly.
You will also learn about showing empathy and how to compromise when it is appropriate. In some situations, you may try different
solutions and nothing is working right away; in these cases, you may sometimes have to be patient and politely say, “I hear what you are saying.
Maybe we can talk about this another time and try again to solve the problem?” Or sometimes, if everyone doesn’t know about the four steps to
problem solving, it can turn into a bigger argument. Be patient and open-minded to different perspectives and strategies. Here are the four steps
in the problem-solving model and a visual picture to help you remember.

Activity C: Problem-Solving Application

10 MINS.

Use Supplement 8.4 again to apply the four-step problem-solving model to the example situations. There are
three situations listed below the sample script. Choose two of the three situations to do at this time. Read the
situation samples aloud. Remind students to use Supplement 8.3 to reference possible ways to solve the
problem. As a whole group, complete the first situation you choose. The next situation can be with a partner
or in a small group. The third situation is provided in the event that you have a need to repeat the exercise
with the same group and/or to provide variety for future classes. A “twist” is included at the end of the
scenario to provide students with a deeper level of thinking and utilization of problem-solving skills.
Sample Script
Now that we’ve talked about the steps, let’s go through some example situations and see how we would apply these steps. I will read the first
situation and we will discuss the steps together as a class. We will write our thoughts in the middle column under Situation 1. For Situation 2, you
will partner with the person next to you (or get into small groups), go through the problem-solving model, and write down your ideas in the
Situation 2 column.

Situation 1
• Problem: You and your classmate are partnered up to do a science project. The two of you disagree on

218
 how to do the project.
• Twist: You know that your classmate is really good at science.
Situation 2
• Problem: Your friend has a crush on the same person you do. You notice that they have been talking to
each other more often and you hear that the other person make also like your friend.
• Twist: You know that sometimes you tend to be jealous of others.
Situation 3
• Problem: You were told by a few classmates that your close friend is spreading rumors about you at school
or online. You feel that people are giving you looks, and now you are furious at your friend.
• Twist: You had made prior arrangements with your friend to come over to your house for dinner and
hang out.

Activity D: Discuss Examples and Nonexamples of Problem Solving

10 MINS.
Begin with the Example Problem below to discuss the ways in which a conflict might be solved. Review the
six problem-solving scenarios listed below to facilitate this discussion, and ask students to evaluate whether
the scenario is an example or nonexample of a helpful way to solve a problem. You may also use other current
and realistic conflicts that may be particularly relevant to your students. Remember, the problem-solving skills
students just discussed may be inappropriate in some situations (e.g., in a life-threatening situation, a
discussion with a potentially dangerous individual may not be safe).

Sample Script
Let’s discuss examples of problem-solving strategies—what to do and what not to do. First, let’s go back to the situation earlier in the pictures of
the students arguing. [See Supplement 8.1.] I will read aloud some strategies, and you tell me if they are examples (helpful) or nonexamples
(unhelpful). Examples are the strategies we want to do or should do. Nonexamples are what we don’t want to do or want to avoid. Then, I’d like
for you to share with a partner your own situations and the strategies you have used in conflicts. Think about situations at school, at home, or in
your community.

Example problem: Begin with the introductory situation to illustrate: the students arguing with each other
over some possible rumors spread at school or posted online. Choose some of the problem-solving strategies
listed below (Problem-Solving Scenarios 1–6), and prompt students with the question, “Is this an example of
problem solving or a nonexample of problem solving?” For the items that are nonexamples of problem solving,
ask students how they would use problem-solving skills to resolve the conflict.
Problem-solving scenario 1 (example): The students identify the problem, say what they want to happen, and
discuss outcomes to different solutions. One of the solutions was to be honest with each other and express
what bothers them. They agree on this solution and shake hands.
Problem-solving scenario 2 (nonexample): The students argue and interrupt each other, and one person gets
close to the other person’s face.
Problem-solving scenario 3 (nonexample): The students identify the problem, say what they each want to
happen in the situation, and each list and discuss a few potential solutions. They can’t agree on any of the
solutions, and they decide to ignore each other or hold a grudge.
Problem-solving scenario 4 (nonexample): The students identify the problem, but they’re each so interested in
describing what they want to happen that they don’t really listen to what the other person wants. The
students are arguing over each other and raising their voices, and each says that he or she will get other

219
 students to dislike the other, bringing third parties into the argument.
Problem-solving scenario 5 (example): The students identify the problem, say what they each want to happen,
and each list and discuss a few potential solutions. One of the solutions is to agree to use evidence and
agree that spreading rumors is disrespectful.
Problem-solving scenario 6 (nonexample): The principal gets involved, calms the students down, and tells the
students to see a counselor. As the two students walk away, they use a few last rude words and hand
gestures to continue the fight a little longer.

Putting It All Together

5 MINS.
Use the following activity to practice the concepts discussed in this lesson.
Sample Script
Let’s practice what we’ve learned by putting it all together.

In small groups or as a class, use the following questions to ask students to share the lesson’s talking points.
• What are examples for the terms responsible, respectful, attitude, conflict/problem, communication, resolution,
resolve, and problem solving/conflict resolution?
• What are some strategies for dealing with conflict?
• Can you describe the four-step problem-solving model?
• Why is being responsible, respectful, and realistic; taking perspectives; using communication skills; and
thinking about choices important to conflict resolution?

Closure

2 MINS.
Close the lesson using a short breathing activity and a reflection on the lesson content.
Sample Script
Let’s take a moment to regroup. Close your eyes and rest your hands in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor. Relax the muscles in your body and face.
Relax and soften your stomach muscles. Counting to 3, take a deep breath in slowly. Inhale the air down into your lungs. Feel your chest and
stomach expand like a balloon. [Pause.] Now, exhale, counting to 4. Feel your chest and stomach collapse as all the air exits your body. [Pause.]
Again, inhale deep into your lungs so that your stomach expands [Pause.] and exhale. [Pause.] Take a moment to think about something you
learned today that was important to you or you really liked. [Note to instructor: Pause for a moment to allow time for reflection.] Counting
to 3, take one more deep breath in slowly [Pause.] and exhale, counting to 4. [Pause.]

Tips for Transfer Training and Homework

Use the ideas and activities in the following section to practice this lesson’s content with your students at other
times during the day. Also, remember to precorrect, remind, and reinforce concepts from this lesson in
activities throughout the school week and to encourage students to use the skills taught in this lesson across
settings including home, the bus, and the cafeteria.

Additional Activities
• Here are some suggested books:
How to Stop Arguing: Dealing With Stress, Anger, Rejection, Conflict, Fighting, and Difficult People by
Amber Rain

220
 The Fear of Conflict Treatment: How to Overcome Your Fear of Conflict and Express Yourself With Confidence
for Life by Allan Green
Eight Keys by Suzanne LaFleur
• Have students make a list of conflicts and identify if any of the strategies were used. Then, have students
identify how they showed respect to another person through their communication strategies (e.g.,
looking, listening, talking).
• Have students ask family members or neighbors to describe conflicts they’ve experienced. Discuss how the
steps to conflict resolution could have helped.

Homework Handout

Pass out Supplement 8.5, Using a Problem-Solving Model to Resolve Conflicts. Explain to students that they
will use the problem-solving model to work through a past or current problem situation and provide a new
resolution for the problem.

221
SUPPLEMENT 8.1 LESSON 8: Solving People Problems

Pictures of Two Students Arguing

222
Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

223
SUPPLEMENT 8.2 LESSON 8: Solving People Problems

Key Terms and Definitions

Responsible
This is making choices that are considerate of yourself and others, being able to choose right from
wrong, following through with your word or promise, and being dependable.
Example: The students found a wallet with some cash in it. Instead of taking the money or keeping the
wallet, they decide to turn it in to the office.
Example: The students disagree about who made the winning basketball shot, but they decide that it
doesn’t matter who made the last shot as long as their team won.

Attitude
This is the way you choose to think about things and how those thoughts are reflected in your
behaviors toward a situation or a problem.
Example: While working on a group project with a student with whom he does not always get along,
Timothy knew he would have to change his attitude because he was beginning to act disrespectfully.

Conflict
This is a disagreement or something that doesn’t match or work well together.
Example: The students had a conflict when they could not agree on how to start the project.

Problem solving/conflict resolution

This is a way of dealing with a problem in a helpful or constructive manner and finding some way to
reach an agreement.
Example: The students used conflict resolution to decide who would drive to the party.

Communication
This is expressing oneself effectively after listening to the other person’s perspective while respecting
the rights and beliefs of others.
Example: The student used communication in the group to discuss a science topic that she had been
researching for a few months, but she also listened to comments from her peers.

Resolution
This is the process of (trying to) settle the conflict or find a solution.
Example: After disagreeing about who would be the lead presenter in a group project, the two students
decided on a resolution of each taking turns talking.

Resolve
This is reaching a decision or finding a solution.
Example: The students were able to resolve their disagreement by finding a possible solution and
deciding to try it.

Respectful
Showing consideration or thoughtfulness is being respectful.
Example: The students were respectful toward the chaperones on their field trip to the science
conference.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

224
225
SUPPLEMENT 8.3 LESSON 8: Solving People Problems

Conflict Resolution: What Can I Do?

Compromise
One or both people agree to give up a little of what they originally wanted but are okay with it in order
to resolve the conflict.

Agreement
Both individuals decide on a resolution or plan.

Agree to disagree
Both people decide this is something they will likely not agree on, and they will accept this fact.
Having differing perspectives is okay!

Friendly rivalry/leave it to chance

People decide to play a game to resolve the conflict or just not do anything and see how things turn
out.

Seeking guidance from an adult

You can ask an objective outside party, someone you trust who can help give responsible suggestions.

Making a deal
Both people agree to do one thing in exchange for something else (e.g., “If I do this, will you do
that?”).

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

226
SUPPLEMENT 8.4 LESSON 8: Solving People Problems

A Four-Step Problem-Solving Model for

Conflict Resolution

Four-step problem-solving model Situation 1 example Situation 2 example

1. Identify the problem: What are you

arguing about?
• Have the other person state his or
her wants and feelings.
• Describe how you feel.
• Read the other person’s body
language.
• Summarize both people’s wants
and feelings and what they suggest.
Is there a disagreement?

2. Develop a plan (solutions): List some

of the ways you can solve the problem.
Each person should generate at least
two solutions.
• Is someone willing to compromise?
• It is important to be open minded
and respectful instead of being
spiteful or sarcastic during this
brainstorming of ideas step.
• Which way seems the most
reasonable, responsible, and
respectful for those involved?

227
3. Evaluate the plan: Determine whether
the plan will work.
• What would happen if…?
• Would it be safe and fair?
• How would everyone feel?
• Does it work for all involved?
• Is it a win-win situation?
• Is the plan realistic and does it help
make the situation better?

4. Implement the plan: Everyone agrees

to try the plan.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

228
SUPPLEMENT 8.5 LESSON 8: Solving People Problems

Using a Problem-Solving
Model to Resolve Conflicts
Name (optional) ______________________________

Directions: Think of a problem or conflict you had with a person in the past for which you wish you
had done something differently. How did you handle it? How could you have handled it differently?
Use the problem-solving steps you learned today and provide a new ending to this problem or conflict.
Refer to Supplement 8.3 for ideas on alternatives to conflict.

Four-step problem-solving Situation

model

1. Identify the problem: What

are you arguing about?

2. Develop a plan (solutions):

List some of the ways you
can solve this problem. Each
person should generate at
least two solutions.

3. Evaluate the plan:

Determine whether the plan
will work.

4. Implement the plan: All

parties agree to the plan.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.

229
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

230
231
 Letting Go of Stress

SEL Competencies Addressed in This Lesson

Teacher Notes

Purpose and Objectives

This lesson provides students with the skills to understand the different kinds of stress and its effects and ways
to proactively cope with stress. In this lesson, students will
• Identify helpful and unhelpful stress and stress triggers
• Understand the effects stress can have on our emotional and physical well-being
• Learn the difference between realistic (achievable) and unrealistic (unachievable) expectations on ourselves

232
 that may produce stress
• Learn relaxation and coping techniques to reduce stress
• Learn how to choose helpful ways to manage and release stress

Materials Needed
Supplement 9.1 (online download)
Supplements 9.2–9.5 (online download and handout)
Supplement 9.6 (homework handout)

Running Short on Time?

Suggested stopping points: end of Activity B and Closure activity. When continuing the lesson, begin with
the Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity found in the Introduction section and Activity C.

Instructor Reflection
Stress is a normal part of life. It can occur when there are difficulties in our lives; it can also occur when there
are good things happening, such as a job promotion, a wedding, and travel. How we perceive it and deal with
it, the intensity of the stress we experience, and the kinds of expectations that we place on ourselves can all
affect stress level. Helpful stress encourages us to work harder or smarter at tasks, and unhelpful stress slows us
down and acts as a barrier to accomplishing tasks. When stress occurs, there are positive ways to manage it.
What types of stress have you experienced that affected you in a positive way? What types of stress did you
find difficult to manage or affected you negatively? Were your expectations for yourself or the situation
realistic or unrealistic? Think about what you did to manage your stress. Was it a temporary fix or did it work
for you in the long term?

Review

2-3 MINS.
Review the ideas (listed below) that were discussed in Lesson 8: Solving People Problems.
• Importance of being responsible, respectful, and realistic; taking perspectives; using communication and
listening skills; and thinking about choices in conflict management
• Options for resolving conflict
• Four-step problem-solving model to resolve conflict
• Examples and nonexamples of conflict resolution
Sample Script
During our last meeting, we discussed ways to solve problems during conflicts. We talked about being responsible, respectful, and realistic; taking
perspectives; and using communication and listening skills during conflict with others. We also talked about ways we can solve problems and make
healthy choices in times of conflict. We also discussed the four-step problem-solving model and examples and nonexamples of conflict resolution.

Introduction

10 MINS.

233
Introduce the lesson. Lead students in a focusing activity. Show Supplement 9.1 as a start-up activity, and
discuss how emotions and thoughts may be different in each picture and how different situations may evoke
different feelings.
Sample Script
Today, we will talk about stress. Stress can affect our physical and emotional health, so we will learn to distinguish the kind of stress that can help
us from the kind of stress that doesn’t help us and can even slow us down. We need to know ways to cope with stress so we can stay healthy and be
able to do the things we need to do every day.

Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity

2 MINS.
Sample Script
Let’s practice settling our bodies and focusing our minds. Close your eyes or look at a point on the floor or on your desk. Rest your hands
comfortably. Feel your feet on the floor or your hands as they rest. Pay attention to your breathing for three breaths. [Pause for three breaths.]
Today’s lesson will talk about ways we can take good care of ourselves. One thing we can do is be kind to ourselves. Sometimes, we focus on the
mistakes we make or we feel like we’re not good enough. Just like we thought of kind thoughts to send to another person the last time we met, we
can send kind thoughts to ourselves. You might say to yourself, “I am wishing myself happiness.” Take a moment to think of something kind to say
to yourself and say it silently and with a little smile. We’ll do this for about a minute. [Pause for 1 minute.] Now, let’s take two breaths together.
[Pause.] When you finish letting out the second breath, slowly open your eyes. We are ready to move on to our lesson.

Introduction (Continued)

8 MINS.

Sample Script
Let’s take a look at these pictures. What do you think these kids are thinking or feeling? How can you tell? [Take a moment and review each
picture in Supplement 9.1 individually.] Now, look closely. Do you notice anything common in these pictures? Despite the fact that these people
may have different feelings and thoughts, all might be feeling stress. Stress is the way your body gets you ready to face challenges and positive
situations with attention, energy, and strength. Stress can be caused by feeling worried or anxious, like getting into an argument with a friend.
You can also feel stress if something good is happening, like going on a vacation with your family or your team going to the playoffs. It’s exciting
but also stressful because there’s a lot of pressure and plans to make. A little bit of stress can give you the motivation to get things done. This is
considered healthy or helpful stress. But there can be problems when your level of stress feels overwhelming and you have a hard time dealing with
it. Think about a volume slider as a stress intensity scale. Sometimes if it’s higher than usual, it might suggest a great level of stress. For example,
the volume slider may be high when you’re feeling sick to your stomach or having a headache when you feel stress. When you’re feeling stressed, you
may not sleep or eat well or even think or remember things very well. Stress is part of being human, and it can help us or it can get in the way of
achieving our goals. In this lesson, we will learn some ways to manage our stress. Keep in mind the pictures we saw. Perhaps put yourself in these
situations and imagine where your stress falls on an intensity scale. We will come back to this later in the lesson.

Key Terms and Definitions

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 9.2 as a handout to define the key terms that will be used in this lesson. Then, discuss the
concepts in the table (at the bottom of the slide/handout) regarding commons signs of stress that affect
different areas of daily functioning.

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 Sample Script
Here are some important words or ideas that will help us understand stress and what it may look like. We’ll define the words and discuss examples
to understand what they mean. [After going through the definitions, review the concepts in the table. Then ask about which signs of
stress students have experienced.] Here are some signs of stress in four different areas. Can you think of any other signs that can go in this table?
Write your responses on your handout so that you can remember all the signs.

Effects of Stress on Body, Emotions, and Behavior

10 MINS.
Stress affects your body, emotions, and behavior. Too much stress or feeling stressed for a long period of time
has been associated with health problems.
Sample Script
Stress not only affects your thoughts, emotions, mind, and behavior, but it can also affect your health. Sometimes, you may think you are sick
because of a headache or because you can’t sleep or eat, but stress could be part of the problem. Let’s consider a car dashboard. There are different
signs and lights that flash when you start the car. Sometimes certain lights stay on to warn you that something is wrong with the car and you have
to take it into the mechanic to get it checked out and fixed so you can drive safely. Your body can give you signals kind of like a dashboard. It gives
you feelings and sensations to get your attention so you can focus on things that may be affecting you in other ways. On the car, the warning light
on the dashboard is telling you to “stop and pay close attention to how the car is driving.” If you know about some of the signs of stress and are
aware of yourself and how you react to situations, you can start to manage stress in a helpful way. Stress affects people of all ages, and it can
interfere with your relationships and your ability to focus and do well in school, at work, or in life.

Activity A: Stress Symptoms and Sample Situations

9 MINS.

Use Supplement 9.3 as a handout to facilitate a discussion (in either large or small groups) about the ways in
which your body, emotions, thoughts, and behaviors may show stress symptoms. Read the situations aloud, or
students can read them in small groups. Discuss the scenarios and how stress may be exhibited in different
people and situations. Ask students to discuss/write their reactions under each column to explain how they
might feel. Students should be able to relate to some of the signs of stress and see that other students may feel
differently in stressful situations. Consider modifying the situations to make them even more relevant to your
students’ current situations.
Sample Script
There are some situations that would make almost anyone feel relaxed, and other situations that make many feel stressed. For example, going to
the movies with your friends may make you feel good and relaxed. Having to make a speech in front of a large group of people on a topic that you
do not enjoy may make you feel stressed. Sometimes, people can feel more stress about a particular situation because of their attitude or the way they
are thinking about the situation—like when they have unrealistic or unhealthy expectations of themselves. They may be caught in thinking traps,
they might be having a bad day, or they might not feel confident in what they are doing. Sometimes, stress comes as a result of feeling unprepared
or uncomfortable in a situation that you have no choice about enduring. At times, stress comes from a feeling of not being able to escape from that
situation or from other situations that require more from us than we are able or willing to give in that moment. Some people even experience stress
as a physiological response that they can’t easily identify, like the stress associated with being in an enclosed space. [Allow time for discussion in
either whole group or small groups.]

Stress Triggers and Healthy and Unhealthy Coping Strategies

20-30 MINS.
Identifying healthy ways of coping and the triggers that make us stressed will lead to better awareness and
more effective coping strategies.
Sample Script
We can find ways to cope with our stress that are helpful and healthy. We can also figure out the specific triggers that may make us feel stressed.

235
 First, we’ll start by talking about coping strategies.

Activity B: Healthy and Unhealthy Coping Strategies

10-15 MINS.
Generate specific ways students can relax or find positive solutions when they are experiencing or anticipating
stress. Encourage them to share what they have used in the past or might try. Write ideas suggested by the
students on the board, even those you may consider unhelpful (e.g., alcohol, drugs, over-or undereating). Be
prepared to name ways these methods could cause more trouble in the future (e.g., addiction, poor judgment
with decision making, problems in relationships, physical illness, increases in risky behavior, accidents). Be
prepared to refer students to appropriate school resources if students need help with these issues for
themselves or their friends and family. If students do not mention any solutions, refer to the examples in the
table below. The next step will be to evaluate them as helpful/healthy or unhelpful/unhealthy ways to deal
with stress and discuss whether the outcomes would be desirable in the long term.
If students bring up alcohol or drug use, emphasize the legalities and health risks involved in both the
short and long run, and encourage these students to talk with a trusted adult (e.g., parent, school personnel).
Also, consider discussing that these maladaptive coping strategies are temporary ways to escape. They do not
address the cause of the stress but only confound the problem.
Sample Script
Let’s talk about some of the ways we manage our stress. What are some things you could do when you’re feeling stress or when you know you’re
about to get into a stressful situation? Think of things that you’ve done when you felt stressed or overwhelmed about a situation. I’ll write them up
on the board, and we’ll discuss them. After we make our list, I would like volunteers to come up and put a plus sign next to the examples that are
helpful or healthy, and a minus sign next to the ones that are unhelpful or unhealthy. Healthy ways of coping with stress are helpful in the long
term, whereas unhealthy ways are only temporary escapes. In time, they can actually make things worse. We will discuss these choices and talk
about their outcomes. Keep in mind that some examples can be both helpful and unhelpful. I want you to also keep in mind that whatever
strategies you use, ask yourself these questions, “Will this cause me more stress in the long run?” and “Will this help me feel better or work harder?”

Here are examples of (+) helpful/healthy and (-) unhelpful/unhealthy ways of dealing with stress:

(+) Helpful/healthy ways (-) Unhelpful/unhealthy ways Both helpful and unhelpful ways

(+) Talk about the problem with (-) Use alcohol or other drugs. (+,-) Cry.
friends or family.

(+) Take a walk or hike outside. (-) Eat a whole cake by yourself. (+,-) Scream in the bathroom.

(+) Do physical activity (e.g., yoga, (-) Sleep all day. (+/-) Remove yourself from the situation for an
martial arts, skateboarding, extended period of time.
dancing, swimming).

(+) Count to 10 to give yourself (-) Get angry at your family or

time to think. friends.

(+) See a medical provider to see if (-) Tell yourself that you are the
there is help available. worst person in the world.

(+) Face the source of your fears (-) Procrastinate by playing video
(e.g., if having to do a speech, games.
practice beforehand to build
comfort).

(+) Choose healthy foods. (-) Distract yourself by going on

the computer, surfing the
Internet, or chatting with your

236
 friends for an amount of time
that gets in the way of
household or school
responsibilities.

(+) Talk to a friend, a family (-) Stop exercising.

member, or a clergy member.

(+) Practice deep breathing and (-) Chew on pencils, paper, or

meditating. other objects.

(+) Draw or make other art work. (-) Smoke cigarettes.

(+) Imagine a calm place or resting

in a peaceful place in nature.

(+) Refer to my Strong Kids

training and think about
strategies I learned.

(+) Engage in a hobby such as

reading, crafts, or playing
sports.

(+) Keep a journal.

Activity C: Personal Triggers and Stress Identification

10-15 MINS.

Use Supplement 9.4 as a handout and have students, in small groups, discuss, role play, and respond to the
following questions about their personal stress: 1) What was your body feeling? 2) What thoughts, emotions,
and behaviors did you have? 3) What was the level of your emotions on the intensity scale? 4) How did you
reframe thinking traps? 5) Did you have realistic expectations and strive for excellence, or did you expect
perfection? 6) How did you cope? 7) How did it work? Allow time for students to complete the handout, and
then come together for a class discussion. Facilitate a discussion on the pressure that we may put on ourselves
when we expect to be perfect at something, and how they might cause stress. Emphasize that it is okay if
students do not feel stress or do not know how stress affects their body.
Sample Script
We’ve talked about stress and how it may affect your body, thoughts, emotions, and behavior, and we’ve discussed healthy and unhealthy ways to
deal with stress. Now, I would like you to get with a partner and discuss stress in your lives, using the worksheet to write down your thoughts.
First, make a list of the things or triggers that can lead to stress. Remember, different things can make people feel more or less stressed, and stress
can be visualized on a scale of intensity. Sometimes, stress is created by thinking traps, such as black-and-white thinking, or when we expect too
much from ourselves or we expect to be perfect at something. There’s no right or wrong thing to put on your list. Rank order the items you’ve listed
so that you have an idea of the different things that cause you more or less stress. Then, choose the stressor that you ranked first—the one that
stresses you the most. Talk about how you felt and what you did in that situation. Then, in the body diagram, identify and put an X if you know
what part of your body felt the stress. Some people may feel their stress in their neck, their back, their jaw, their stomach, or multiple places in their
body. Some people may not notice stress in their body. That’s okay; everyone is different. Talk about your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors that
told you about your stress. Finally, talk about how you coped with your stress in that situation. Afterward, we will talk about our similarities and
differences. Last, talk about ways you can prepare for the next time you expect to encounter your stress triggers.

237
Relaxation Techniques to Manage Stress

10 MINS.
Relaxation techniques can be used to manage stress and help our bodies relax. These techniques to help relieve
stress can be done anywhere.
Sample Script
Now that we’ve talked about stress, let’s figure out ways to help our bodies relax, decrease tension, and feel better. We will try a relaxation exercise
together. In the future, when you start to feel yourself getting stressed by noticing small symptoms, or if you identify a trigger, you can think back to
this exercise. You can do this on your own, in a quiet place, or even when you are doing other things. At the end of the relaxation activity, I would
like for you to quietly say something positive about yourself.

Activity D: Relaxation Exercise

5-10 MINS.

Use Supplement 9.5 as a handout to describe a brief relaxation exercise. Relaxation exercises with deep
breathing have benefits of improving health, decreasing stress, and improving overall emotional well-being.
Two options are provided: abdominal breathing (Option 1) or muscle relaxation (Option 2). Choose one that
is most appropriate for your students, and you can use the other option for another time. You may want to
dim the lights and play relaxing music during either exercise.
Sample Script
We are going to do some relaxation exercises that include deep breathing or diaphragmatic breathing. This type of breathing helps with improving
health by optimizing the immune system; reducing negative stress by reducing the stress hormone cortisol; improving mood, mental focus, and
concentration; and boosting overall emotional well-being. The first relaxation exercise is called diaphragmatic breathing [Option 1]/muscle
relaxation [Option 2]. We will try to [Option 1] focus on the movement of our stomachs for abdominal breathing or [Option 2] tighten and
loosen our muscles for muscle relaxation. Let’s get started.

Putting It All Together

5 MINS.
Use the following activity to practice the concepts discussed in this lesson.
Sample Script
Let’s practice what we’ve learned by putting it all together.

Review the concepts from this lesson that are listed below.
• Stress is a normal part of being human and it can be different for everyone.
• Identify common signs of stress.
• Identify how you feel when stressed.
• Identify your stress triggers.
• Identify realistic and unrealistic expectations for yourself.
• Identify helpful and unhelpful ways of reacting to stress.
• Apply relaxation exercise.
Sample Script
Today, we learned about stress and relaxation. Everyone feels stress differently and it varies from situation to situation. A little stress is normal
and it can spur you to work harder. If you are super-relaxed and don’t care about how things turn out, you may not be motivated to accomplish
your goals or things that are challenging. Remember that there are different ways to deal with stress, which can either help or make things worse in

238
 the long run. Be careful of strategies that are temporary, because these strategies can trick you in the moment but make things worse in the long
term. It can be helpful to make decisions about how you spend your time. Working too much and worrying too much can cause a lot of stress. On the
other hand, if you’re only dealing with school stuff or working and have no time to hang out with your family or friends or do fun activities, you
can feel a lot of stress. Interestingly, doing too many activities that are fun can also cause stress if it causes you to fall behind in your school or work.
To help you cope with stress before it becomes overwhelming, you can become more aware of your triggers; how you cope emotionally, mentally, and
physically; and how stress management strategies are used. Also, you can use the relaxation exercise to lessen the feeling of stress.

Closure

2 MINS.
Close the lesson using a brief breathing activity and a reflection on the lesson content.
Sample Script
Let’s take a moment to regroup. Close your eyes and rest your hands in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor. Relax the muscles in your body and face.
Relax and soften your stomach muscles. Counting to 3, take a deep breath in slowly. Inhale the air down into your lungs. Feel your chest and
stomach expand like a balloon. [Pause.] Now, exhale, counting to 4. Feel your chest and stomach collapse as all the air exits your body. [Pause.]
Again, inhale deep into your lungs so that your stomach expands [Pause.] and exhale. [Pause.] Take a moment to think about something you
learned today that was important to you and you really liked. [Note to instructor: Pause for a moment to allow time for reflection.]
Counting to 3, take one more deep breath in slowly [Pause.] and exhale, counting to 4. [Pause.]

Tips for Transfer Training and Homework

Use the ideas and activities in the following section to practice this lesson’s content with your students
throughout the week to help reinforce the skills. Also, remember to precorrect, remind, and reinforce concepts
from this lesson in activities throughout the school week and to encourage students to use the skills taught in
this lesson across settings including home, the bus, and the cafeteria.

Additional Activities
• Here are some suggested books:
Fighting Invisible Tigers: Stress Management for Teens (Revised and updated 3rd rdition) by Earl Hipp
Too Stressed to Think? A Teen Guide to Staying Sane When Life Makes You Crazy by Annie Fox and Ruth
Kirschner (eBook)
What to Do When Good Enough Isn’t Good Enough: The Real Deal on Perfectionism: A Guide for Kids by
Thomas S. Greenspon
• Writing activities
For older students, instruct them: “For the next four days, if you feel stress, take 15–20 minutes to write
down your deepest feelings about an emotional challenge in life (past or current). See what happens if
you take a few minutes to write down what is making you stress and then walk away. Think about
these questions at the end of writing or at the end of walking away: 1) What are your thoughts and
how did you feel? 2) How did you manage your stress? 3) Did it work?”
For students who enjoy drawing, encourage them to keep a note pad in their backpack. Instruct them:
“For one week, draw your thoughts and how you feel. Did you feel stress? How did you cope with
your stress?”

Homework Handout

239
Pass out Supplement 9.6, Letting Go of Stress. Explain that students will write about situations where they
felt stressed; they will choose strategies that work for them, plan for an anticipated stressor, and choose a
relaxation technique.

240
SUPPLEMENT 9.1 LESSON 9: Letting Go of Stress

Pictures of Stressful Situations

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

241
242
SUPPLEMENT 9.2 LESSON 9: Letting Go of Stress

Key Terms and Definitions

Stress
A feeling of physical and/or emotional tension or pressure that is often related to being challenged to
perform or react outside of your typical range of behaviors (outside of your “comfort zone”), this feeling
can happen before, during, or after a difficult or exciting situation.
Example: You can feel stressed, worried, uncomfortable, or overwhelmed when you have too much to
do or when you are trying to concentrate on something important and you feel distracted and nervous
inside. Stress can also occur when there is uncertainty or if outcomes are unknown.

Excellence
Work diligently to reach goals that are ambitious yet realistic, learning from disappointments and
setbacks, and persevering.
Example: You have a goal in mind and know it will take work to accomplish it. You understand that
mistakes are part of the process of learning and growing, and you feel good about your effort.

Perfectionism
This is striving for flawlessness or exceptionally high performance standards.
Example: You feel as if you have to do everything right and you are not allowed to make a mistake. You
often are concerned about what other people think of you. It may take you a very long time to finish a
project because you re-do much of the work; you aren’t quite satisfied, even after knowing the product
you will hand in will likely get a good grade.

Helpful or healthy stress

This kind of stress helps us work harder to get what we want; it usually doesn’t lead to feeling
overwhelmed or exhausted.
Example: You may do a better job on your research project if the stress inspires you to prepare well
before you have to present it to the class (e.g., healthy competition, positive anticipation of an event,
personal goals).

Unhelpful or unhealthy stress

This kind of stress can interfere with accomplishing our goals and makes us feel upset more often than
not.
Examples: You continue thinking about the research project so much, you become exceedingly worried
to the point you feel sick and take time off, and you don’t finish the project (e.g., deadlines that may be
very difficult to meet, feeling unprepared, not knowing the outcome of something that may be life
changing).

Situational triggers
This is something that can lead to stress.
Example: A particular activity (e.g., giving a speech), place (e.g., being at a family member’s house
where there is a lot of conflict), person/people (e.g., being with people you don’t know or don’t like), or
personal expectation (e.g., having to do well on a test or you may get a lower grade for the semester).
Triggers can vary from person to person and situation to situation. The situation is a source of tension
that may heighten/increase your emotions and trigger stress.

Relaxation
This is a feeling of letting go of stress. You can do this by physically loosening tense muscles or finding
other healthy ways to deal with the things that are bothering or overwhelming you.
Example: The test was so hard that doing some relaxation breathing was the only way to begin to

243
relieve the tension. Deep breathing and taking a walk in nature are examples of healthy ways to relax.

Realistic/unrealistic expectations
These are expectations you have for yourself that can affect stress. Expectations can be too high (e.g.,
you expect too much from yourself) or too low (e.g., you expect too little from yourself). Realistic
expectations are challenging yet achievable.
Example: Are the expectations you have doable for that situation (realistic), or are the expectations you
have too far to reach or obtain (unrealistic), at least in the moment? Unrealistic expectations can add
stress if they make you more overwhelmed.

Common signs of stress

Stress can affect your body (physical), how you think (thoughts), how you feel (emotions), and how
you behave (behavior). There are different signs or cues that let you know that you are experiencing
unhealthy stress. (Discuss the example symptoms in the table below.)

Example: Signs of stress

Thoughts Emotions Physical Behavior

Worrying Irritability or short Aches and pains Sleeping too much or too little
temper
Anxious or racing Feeling overwhelmed Rapid heartbeat Eating too much or too little
thoughts
Thinking traps Moodiness Nausea, fatigue Nervous habits (nail biting,
pacing)
Difficulties Unhappiness Sensitive to sounds and Procrastination
concentrating noises

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

244
SUPPLEMENT 9.3 LESSON 9: Letting Go of Stress

Stress Symptoms and Example Situations

Situation 1 (school example)

Mark forgot that he had a history test today, and he didn’t study for it. The teacher passes out the test,
and Mark sits and stares at his test. What are some helpful or healthy ways to deal with his stress?
What are some unhelpful or unhealthy ways to deal with his stress?

Situation 2 (social example)

Sonia is new to her school and wants to attend the school dance. She hears her classmates talking about
the event and who they will be going with. Sonia doesn’t know any of her classmates yet. What are
some helpful or healthy ways to deal with her stress? What are some unhelpful or unhealthy ways to
deal with her stress?

Situation 3 (community example)

Jen is trying out for a play. Her friend tried out for the play last night and said that the director seemed
really picky. What are some helpful or healthy ways to deal with her stress? What are some unhelpful
or unhealthy ways to deal with her stress?

Situation 4 (home example)

At home, José sees his parents arguing with each other about work and taking care of the house.
Sometimes, he even hears them arguing at night when he is in bed. What are some helpful or healthy
ways to deal with his stress? What are some unhelpful or unhealthy ways to deal with his stress?

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

245
246
SUPPLEMENT 9.4 LESSON 9: Letting Go of Stress

Personal Triggers and Stress Identification

1. Write down the things that cause you stress (triggers). Then, rank order your list. Now, circle the
thing that makes you the most stressed.

2. Using the diagram below, put an X on the areas of your body where you feel stress.

3. What emotions, thoughts, and behaviors did you have in that situation?

4. Where was the stress on the intensity scale?

5. Were your expectations realistic? Were you striving for excellence or getting caught in
perfectionism?

6. How did you cope with your stress? Did you reframe thinking traps? Did it work in making your
situation better?

247
 What might you do to plan for the next time you encounter this trigger? What are some ways you
7. could proactively manage your stress or manage it before it gets too intense?

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

248
SUPPLEMENT 9.5 LESSON 9: Letting Go of Stress

Relaxation Techniques
Option 1: Abdominal breathing (optional: play relaxing music)
Sitting comfortably, notice how your body feels at rest. [Pause for 10 seconds.] We will begin to do a
breathing exercise. You have the option to put your hand on your stomach to feel how your body works to move
air in and out in a way that can be relaxing. Like this. [Model putting hand on own stomach.] Now, while
you focus on taking a breath in, let your stomach expand as you inhale. You may imagine filling up a balloon.
Watch me. [Model inhalation with stomach expanding.] Now, as you let the air out and exhale, let your
stomach fall back toward your spine, like this. [Model exhalation with stomach moving back toward
spine.] You don’t need to push the air out with a lot of force. Think of it as a nice, easy, natural cycle of relaxed
and comfortable breathing. Try it a couple more times. [Pause to allow practice.] To keep a nice easy rhythm,
you may want to count to 3 while you inhale, and count to 4 while you exhale. Keep your mind on gently
breathing with your counting. Now, let yourself take about six relaxed breaths. Remember: Breathe in by
letting your stomach expand out. Then naturally breathe out by letting your stomach come back in. Notice how
you begin to relax and calm yourself with this gentle breathing. Enjoy the feeling.

Option 2: Progressive muscle relaxation

• Close your eyes. Take a few minutes to breathe in and out in slow, deep breaths. [Pause for a few breaths.]
• When you’re ready, shift your attention to your right foot. Take a moment to focus on the way it feels.
• Slowly tense the muscles in your right foot, squeezing as tight as you can. Hold for a count of 10. [Pause for
10 brisk counts. You may count aloud or instruct the class to count silently.]
• Relax your right foot. Focus on the tension flowing away and the way your foot feels as it becomes limp and
loose.
• Now, shift your attention to your left foot. Tense these muscles, squeezing tightly and hold for 10 counts.
[Pause for 10, brisk counts.] Then, relax your left foot.
• We will focus on contracting and relaxing other muscles in your body. It may take some practice at first, but
try not to tense muscles other than those I’m mentioning.
• Now focus on [next body part, following the sequence below and using the language above]:
1. Right foot
2. Left foot
3. Right calf
4. Left calf
5. Right thigh
6. Left thigh
7. Hips and buttocks
8. Stomach
9. Chest
10. Back
11. Right arm and hand
12. Left arm and hand
13. Neck and shoulders
14. Face

Now feel the weight of your whole, relaxed body, from the tips of your toes to the top of your head. You are ready
to return to your day refreshed and relaxed.

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Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

250
SUPPLEMENT 9.6 LESSON 9: Letting Go of Stress

Letting Go of Stress
Name (optional) ______________________
1. Write down times or situations in which you felt stress.

2. We talked about strategies that can help you deal with stress. Some are listed below. Check off one
or two relaxation strategies you think you can try to use, or write in one that has worked for you.
Talk to a trusted friend or adult.
Exercise or take a walk in nature.
Think positively about yourself and the situation; have healthy expectations.
Address the situation one step at a time using the problem-solving model.
Focus on your breathing and relaxing your muscles.
Identify and reframe thinking traps.
____________________________________
3. This week when I _______________________________________
(write in stressful situation), I will ________________________________
(write in relaxation technique).
4. After you have tried using one of the techniques you checked off above, write about how it worked
for you. Did it work? What will you do next time in the same situation?
It helped!

I’ll try something different next time.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

251
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 Positive Living

SEL Competencies Addressed in This Lesson

Teacher Notes

Purpose and Objectives

This lesson teaches students how to incorporate positive habits into their day-to-day lives. In this lesson,
students will
• Understand the value associated with positive daily choices
• List some typical actions or behaviors that contribute to a healthy and positive lifestyle
• Distinguish between examples and nonexamples of positive life choices

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Materials Needed
Supplements 10.1–10.6 (online download and handout)
Supplement 10.7 (homework handout)

Running Short on Time?

Suggested stopping points: end of Activity B and Closure activity.

Instructor Reflection
There is a fundamental relationship between our actions and our emotions. You have probably read
somewhere that exercise can boost your mood and that stress can make you sick. There is also research that
suggests other behaviors and acts such as gratitude, interacting with nature, and volunteering have powerful
and positive impacts on mood and health. Before teaching this lesson, take a few minutes to reflect on
experiences in which your behaviors positively influenced your mood, your health, or how you felt. Think
about your own immediate highs associated with behaviors like achieving (or exceeding!) goals, with
exercising, or with doing something good for someone else. Also, think about the longer-lasting or delayed
effects you’ve found from eating healthily and/or getting a good amount of sleep. During this lesson, you will
be encouraging your students to strive for general well-being by cultivating positive living habits through daily
choices.

Review

2-3 MINS.
Review the ideas (listed below) that were discussed in Lesson 9: Letting Go of Stress.
• Stress triggers
• Common stressors
• Healthy coping strategies and setting realistic expectations
Sample Script
During our last meeting, we discussed what stress triggers are and how to recognize some of the signs of stress. We talked about how to set realistic
expectations for ourselves so we don’t make ourselves so stressed out. We also practiced healthy coping strategies like deep breathing and relaxing our
bodies.

Introduction

3-5 MINS.
Introduce the topic of positive living. Lead students in a focusing activity. Then, discuss the concept of
positive living as a way of developing the habit of looking for the healthy and positive choices in all the things
we do.
Sample Script
Today, we’re going to talk about developing positive habits by looking for the healthy and positive choices in things we do every day. One of the
easiest ways to keep a great attitude is to be on the lookout for choices we can make that lead us to feel more positive in lots of different ways.

Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity

2 MINS.
Sample Script

254
 Before we begin, let’s practice settling our bodies and focusing our minds. Close your eyes or leave your eyes open, looking at a point on the floor or
on your desk. Rest your hands comfortably. Feel your feet on the floor. Notice your breathing, air going in through your nose and out through your
mouth. [Pause for three breaths.] Now, picture in your mind a small tree or a flower waving in the breeze. Allow your upper body to slowly
sway back and forth like the tree or the flower in the wind. Relax your body and notice what your body feels like when it’s moving. Move as slowly
and as little as you want to. You may notice that you have thoughts while you are swaying. That’s okay. When you notice yourself thinking about
something else, just bring your attention back to the feelings in your body as you sway. I’ll tell you when to stop in about a minute. You can also
stop when you are ready. [Pause to allow 1 minute of practice.] Let’s stop swaying and take two breaths together. [Pause.] When you finish
letting out the second breath, slowly open your eyes. We are ready to move on to our lesson.

Key Terms and Definitions

5 MINS.
Use Supplement 10.1 as a handout to define the key terms that will be used in the lesson.

Sample Script
Here are some important terms that will help us understand the role of positive thinking and living. We’ll define the words and discuss examples
to understand what they mean.

What We Do Influences How We Feel

12 MINS.
Things we do physically in our daily lives can influence our emotions, thoughts, and attitudes. Convey the
following ideas:
• It is good to develop healthy habits related to things that have positive impact on our lives.
• Healthy habits are when we regularly do things that are good for us. This means we do them with enough
frequency, effort, and attention to have a positive influence on our lives without it feeling like a burden or
a stress to us. Even good things can be overdone.
• A positive lifestyle includes cultivating a positive attitude in all of life’s daily activities: thinking, eating,
playing, working, and interacting with others.
Sample Script
We can usually make choices in the things we do, like eating, playing, working, and being with other people, that can support a positive lifestyle
and a positive attitude. Remember that in Lesson 8, Solving People Problems, we talked about the importance of attitude and how it can affect
our interactions with others? Well, it can be the other way around, too. Your actions can affect how you think and feel. Positive actions can lead us
to feel more energized, motivated, joyful, and connected to others. So let’s talk about developing healthy habits, which means doing certain things
with balance and moderation, just enough for them to help you, not too much or too little.

Activity A: Activities that Make Me Feel Good, Good About Myself, or Happy
10 MINS.

Use Supplement 10.2 as a handout to facilitate a discussion for this activity. This supplement lists example
activities. Encourage your students to provide additional examples. Use a white board or some other means of
documentation to record students’ responses in a way that everyone can see them. As you write, see if you can
organize the students’ suggestions into the four categories noted in Supplement 10.3: physical health,
emotional and mental health, community connections, and family and social connections.

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 Sample Script
Let’s take a look at some examples of activities we can do that can help us live a healthy life. We’ll also make a list of our own examples. Can
anyone think of examples of doing things that make you feel positive while you’re doing them or maybe after you’ve done them?

How Often Is Too Often?

12 MINS.

Continue to use Supplement 10.2 to discuss how some activities and actions can improve emotional and
physical well-being in the short term, whereas some activities are great as positive and healthy habits for
frequent, long-term use. Use the list of suggestions that the students provided in order to compare activities.
Emphasize that even though certain activities may feel good in the short term (eating ice cream/treats, playing
video games, using social media, talking on the phone, watching TV/movies, reading comic books), they
should probably be sought out less frequently than activities that have longer-lasting positive boosts when
those choices exist.
Sample Script
Let’s think about some of these activities and actions that we’ve listed here. I decided to put them into different groups. For now, I want to make
sure that we focus on the activities and actions that can develop into the kind of habits that make us healthier, stronger, kinder, or smarter in some
way every time we do them. Now, we are going to identify activities in two ways: 1) things we enjoy because they make us feel good right away,
but not necessarily for a long time; and 2) things that help us to become better and better every time we do them.

Activity B: How Often Should I Do This?

10 MINS.
Divide the students into groups and use the activities that were generated by the students and recorded (or
other activities of your own selection) for this activity. Ask students to decide whether the activity has more
long-term or shortterm impact. Ask students to decide if the activity should be a frequent or an occasional
habit. Ask questions such as, “What could happen if we do this too much or not enough?” and “Is this
something that should become a frequent habit or just an occasional activity?”
Sample Script
I’m going to give each of your groups the name of an activity, and I’d like you to work in your group to decide whether you think that activity
should be a frequent habit—meaning something we do regularly—or just an occasional activity, and why.

Areas of Life that We Can Focus On

30 MINS.
Sometimes, small adjustments in only one or two important areas of life can influence other parts of our lives.
Sample Script
Often, it only takes making small changes to make a big difference in our lives. Let’s talk about some things we can do that can have a powerful
impact.

Activity C: Healthy Habits

10 MINS.

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Use Supplement 10.3 as a handout along with the list your students created and/or the list provided below.
Discuss the examples and suggestions provided in the different life areas that can influence general well-being.
• Eating healthy foods in the right amounts at the right times and for the right reasons
• Exercising regularly, but not too much
• Spending time in the outdoors, either doing activities or appreciating nature
• Helping others who are in need
• Being polite to others
• Helping around the house
• Engaging in quiet time/down time/meditation
• Getting enough sleep each night
• Looking for reasons to be grateful
• Taking responsibility for things that you should (stepping up)
Sample Script
Let’s look at our list again and see if there is anything we’ve forgotten. [Use the list above to augment your list if necessary.] Remember how I
broke it into four categories. [If you haven’t already, conduct an activity to label the items on your list into the four categories: physical
health, emotional and mental health, community connections, and family and social connections.] Let’s talk about what kinds of healthy
habits we expect to see in each of these areas.

Activity D: Seeing Healthy Choices Every Day

10 MINS.

Use Supplements 10.4 and 10.5 as handouts (weekday and weekend routines), and encourage students to
think about what they routinely do in any given day. Encourage students to look for opportunities to develop
and support healthy choices in their day-to-day activities by incorporating healthy habits.
Choose one of the following options to conduct the next activity:
• Option 1: Divide your class into discussion groups in which individual students interview each other on
different areas of their day using the questions provided or other questions that they improvise.
• Option 2: Lead the whole class through steps by asking the questions provided and/or by supplementing
with additional questions to eliminate yes/no type answers; for example, “Do you have a choice about
this?” “How would you change this?” “What specifically do you do in this area?”
• Option 3: Extract a subset of questions from across the day and collect “data” on the general habits of
your class.
Sample Script
Now, let’s look at the activities we do during the week and on the weekends. We’ll use these examples to help us think of things we can do in our
own lives.

Activity E: Helping Marcella Improve Her Day

10 MINS.

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Use Supplement 10.6 as a handout to work on the scenario as a class or by breaking the class into groups.
Read the Scenario Script to introduce the scene. Students will examine the character’s daily routine and make
suggestions for changes that can be made toward healthy habits.
Sample Script
Let’s practice looking at another student’s daily routine to see if we have any ideas for how Marcella Llewelyn can have healthy habits.
Scenario Script
Marcella noticed that she didn’t always feel great. She wasn’t sick, but some days it took a lot of work for her to find reasons to be happy. She
wasn’t sure exactly what to do, so she decided to look for small things to change in her life every day. Can you help identify some of the things
Marcella can change that might have a long-term positive effect on her life and that could help her feel more energized and motivated? Here’s a
hint: It may be best to skip some stages and return to them when you know more information about her day.

Putting It All Together

5-10 MINS.

Use the following activity to practice the concepts discussed in this lesson.
Sample Script
Let’s practice what we’ve learned by putting it all together.

Use the Supplement 10.3 handout again. Using the questions in the Sample Script, call on students to discuss
the main ideas that were reviewed in this lesson.
Sample Script
We are going to review some of the main ideas discussed in today’s lesson. Raise your hand if you know some of these ideas.
• What is healthy or positive living about?
• What are some parts of healthy living?
• How can we feel better about ourselves?

Closure

2 MINS.
Close the lesson using a brief breathing activity and a reflection on the lesson content. At the end, prompt
students to bring a photo of themselves at a younger age.
Sample Script
Let’s take a moment to regroup. Close your eyes. Feel your feet on the floor. Counting to 3, take a breath in slowly. Inhale [Pause.] and exhale,
counting to 4. [Pause.] One more time, inhale [Pause.] and exhale. [Pause.] Take a moment to think about something you learned today that
was important to you and you really liked. [Note to instructor: Pause for a moment to allow time for reflection.] Counting to 3, take one
more deep breath in slowly [Pause.] and exhale, counting to 4. [Pause.]
For next week’s lesson (Lesson 11: Creating Strong and SMART Goals), one of the activities requires you to bring a picture of yourself at a
younger age. It can be any age, but at least 2 years ago. If you don’t have a picture of yourself, you can draw a picture of yourself at a younger age.
Bring the picture to class for our next lesson. We will have a fun activity with it.

Tips for Transfer Training and Homework

Use the ideas and activities in the following section to practice this lesson’s content with your students at other
times during the day. Also, remember to precorrect, remind, and reinforce concepts from this lesson in
activities throughout the school week and to encourage students to use the skills taught in this lesson across
settings including home, the bus, and the cafeteria.

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Additional Activities
• Encourage students to think about healthy choices every day by engaging in an activity called “Healthy
Idea for the Day.” Draw one of the healthy ideas from this lesson from a bag or box in which you’ve
placed all the good ideas. Make whatever you pick into the healthy idea for the day. For example, if on
Monday you select “Being Polite to Others,” your students should look for opportunities to be polite that
day, and so forth. Keep a visible log that tracks the activity for each day so that it can serve as a prompt
during the day’s other events.
• When students experience a moment of success after significant effort or difficult choices, point out the
connection between the choices they made previously and the successes they are enjoying currently.
• When students demonstrate positive living behaviors such as biking to school, exercising, or eating
healthy snacks, take a quiet moment to connect the dots to this lesson for the student.

Homework Handout

Pass out Supplement 10.7 and review the instructions. Explain that students will keep a journal for a week and
look for situations that present choices. Encourage them to keep a record of when they deliberately make a
choice because they believe it is the best choice for a positive lifestyle and attitude.

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SUPPLEMENT 10.1 LESSON 10: Positive Living

Key Terms and Definitions

Habit
A usual way of behaving, this is something that a person does often in a regular and repeated way.
Example: David makes a habit of calling his grandmother every Sunday night before bedtime.

Moderation
Choosing to avoid too much or too little of any one thing, behavior, or activity; and seeking balance in
behaviors and actions is moderation.
Example: Even though Marcella really enjoys long-distance running, she knows that it’s best not to run
long distances every day because her body needs time to rest and repair after that level of activity.

Choice
This is the act of making a decision if there is more than one option from which to select.
Example: Ahmed has an hour between dinner and bedtime and he wants a good night’s sleep. He
decides to read a book instead of eating sweets or playing video games.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

260
SUPPLEMENT 10.2 LESSON 10: Positive Living

Feeling Good Activities

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264
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Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

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SUPPLEMENT 10.3 LESSON 10: Positive Living

Healthy Habits

Physical health Make healthy meal choices every day and eat treats
responsibly. Eat lots of fruits and vegetables, and avoid
sugary, fatty, and processed foods. Eat when you’re actually
hungry, and stop when your body tells you to.
Engage in activities that get you moving every day to make
sure you are using your muscles to get them strong and keep
them that way.
Get the right amount of sleep to allow your muscles to rest;
adolescents should be getting at least 9.5 hours of sleep each
night. For example, go to bed at 8:30 p.m. and wake up at
6:00 a.m.

From U.S. Department of Agriculture. (2016). Choose my plate. Retrieved from

www.choosemyplate.gov.

Emotional and mental health Spend some time outdoors.

Make sure you get fresh air and an opportunity to step away
from screens (computer and TV) and books (this could be
combined with exercise).
Find time to enjoy silence and reframe thinking traps (this
could be combined with your time outdoors).
Make goals: Learn how to do new things or get better at
things.
Be optimistic: Expect good outcomes, and look for ways to
ensure good outcomes when you can.
Refrain from comparing yourself to other people. Find
reasons to be grateful for what you have.

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Community connections Help other people when you can.
Volunteer and do your part to play a role in something larger
than yourself.

Family and social connections Maintain healthy relationships.

Interact positively and pleasantly with friends and family and
people in your community (this can be combined with
helping other people when you can).
Refrain from gossip or talking about other people—either in
person, on the phone, in texts, or online.
Think about what other people need out of a situation as well
as what you need out of a situation.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

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SUPPLEMENT 10.4 LESSON 10: Positive Living

Weekday Habits and Routines

Habits and routines

(PH, physical health; MH, mental health; CC, community connections; SC,
Time/activity school connections; FC, family connections)
Waking up and breakfast Do you have enough time to eat a healthy meal and brush your teeth? (PH)
Do you wake up easily, or is waking up on time a big struggle for you? (MH)
Getting to school If you travel with others to school, are you kind and attentive? (CC)
Do you get to school and to your classes on time? (SC)
Morning at school Are you polite to your teachers and friends? (SC)
Do you follow the rules? (SC)
Are you able to pay attention? (SC)
Lunchtime Do you make healthy meal choices? (PH)
Do you eat only as much as you need? (PH)
Do you chew with your mouth closed/finish chewing before talking? (CC)
Do you eat at a thoughtful pace? (PH)
Afternoon at school Do you pay attention to what the teacher says and follow directions? (SC)
Do you ask questions if you don’t understand? (SC)
Do you complete your assignments? (SC)
Do you help others when helping others is allowed? (CC/SC)
Afternoon/after school Do you make it on time to meet your ride? (CC)
Do you engage in any after-school activities that are healthy for your body and
mind? (PH/MH)
Do you make time for your homework/ask for help when you need it? (SC)
Evening/dinner Do you help with dinner preparations and cleanup? (FC)
Do you eat good portions and make healthy choices? (PH)
Bedtime Do you make sure you do all of the things you need to do to get ready for bed
without resisting or waiting to be told? (FC)
Do you get to bed at the right time? (PH)

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

272
SUPPLEMENT 10.5 LESSON 10: Positive Living

Weekend Habits and Routines

Habits and routines

(PH, physical health; FC, family connections; CC, community connections; SC, school
Time/activity connections; MH, mental health)
Waking up and Do you wake up at a good time so that you don’t sleep in for more than 2 hours longer than
breakfast during a school day? (FC)
Do you eat a healthy breakfast and clean up after yourself? (PH)
Morning activities Do you do chores around your house without being told? (FC)
and events Do you do things in your community when you can? (CC)
Lunchtime Do you eat a healthy lunch and clean up after yourself? (PH)
Afternoon activities Do you find ways to get outdoors that can be helpful to your family or community?
and events (PH/CC)
Do you look for school assignments that may require you to make a trip to a store with your
parents or to your local library so you can be prepared for your school days? (SC)
Events before dinner Do you get clean and calm before dinner? (FC)
and evening activities Do you offer to help or offer healthy suggestions for meals that you will eat? (FC/PH)

Do you avoid playing video games and doing other online activities right before bedtime so
you can sleep better?

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

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SUPPLEMENT 10.6 LESSON 10: Positive Living

Example Situation:
Helping Marcella Make Healthy Choices

Typical routine What would you change and why?

Wake-up time: Marcella typically wakes up at 6:45 a.m.

Getting dressed in the morning: Marcella typically takes

a long time—sometimes more than 20 minutes—to find
something to wear.

Eating breakfast: Marcella usually eats a toaster pastry

while watching a cartoon.

Leaving the house: Marcella always leaves the house in a

hurry and feels like she’s forgetting something.

On the way to school: Marcella takes the 7:30 a.m. bus

and is usually sleepy. She doesn’t talk to anyone and
doesn’t pay much attention to the other people on the
bus.

At school: Marcella tries really hard to listen to the

teachers.

At lunchtime: Marcella is very hungry by lunch, so she

chooses lots of different food from the cafeteria and eats
a lot.

After lunch: Marcella talks with her friends before class.

At home: Marcella goes straight to the fridge, finds a

snack, and watches TV until someone tells her to stop.

Before bed: Marcella is usually doing homework until

bedtime and feels very stressed out as she’s trying to fall
asleep.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

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SUPPLEMENT 10.7 LESSON 10: Positive Living

What Did You Do Toward Positive Living

This Week?
Name (optional) ________________________

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Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

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 Creating Strong and SMART Goals

SEL Competencies Addressed in This Lesson

Teacher Notes

Purpose and Objectives

This lesson teaches students the skill of goal setting and increasing positive activity as a means to a healthy
life. In this lesson, students will
• Understand the importance of increasing and maintaining healthy activities
• Increase awareness of their own strengths and limitations
• Set SMART goals

279
• Monitor progress toward goals
• Develop perseverance in the goal attainment process

Materials Needed
Supplement 11.1 (photographs or drawn pictures of each student at a younger age [2+ years ago])
Supplements 11.2–11.3 (online download and handout)
Supplements 11.4–11.6 (online download)
Supplement 11.7 (homework handout)
Green, red, and yellow colored pencils for Healthy Living Domains activity

Running Short on Time?

Suggested stopping points: end of Activity C and Closure activity.

Instructor Reflection
The Creating Strong and SMART Goals lesson teaches students to set goals to achieve a healthier, more
resilient life. To prepare for this lesson, reflect on the times in your life that you have made personal goals
(e.g., New Year’s resolutions) or professional goals (e.g., getting a specialized license). Reflect on why you
created the goals, and reflect on your progress toward these goals. If you have achieved your goals, what do
you think contributed to your success? If you haven’t achieved your goals yet, have you achieved part of the
goal and what obstacles have you encountered so far? Now, consider an area in your life for which you could
create a new goal or modify an existing goal. Do you see a way the strategies within this lesson can assist you
in creating that goal and a plan for monitoring your progress?

Review

2-5 MINS.
Review the ideas listed below that were discussed in Lesson 10: Positive Living.
• Finding ways to make healthy choices to improve positive living
• Making choices such as eating, playing, working, and being with people who love us, which can support a
positive lifestyle and a positive attitude
• Doing things to help us feel better about ourselves
Sample Script
During our last meeting, we talked about how the things we do can influence the way we feel. We talked about how making healthy choices in all
the things we do, like eating, playing, working, and being with other people who support us, can help us live a healthy lifestyle and have a positive
attitude. We also talked about developing healthy habits in our everyday activities.

Introduction

10 MINS.
Introduce the lesson. Lead students in a focusing activity. Introduce the concept of goal setting and creating
an action plan to meet goals.
Sample Script
Today we will learn how to set goals and accomplish them. Setting and accomplishing goals is something that everyone can do to grow and to

280
 change things in our lives for the better. Doing this successfully is called goal attainment. Together, we will set goals for ourselves and create an
action plan to make them happen.

Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity

2 MINS.
Sample Script
Let’s begin with an activity to settle our bodies and practice focusing our minds. Close your eyes or look at a point in front of you on the floor or on
your desk. Rest your hands comfortably on your desk or in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor or your hands as they rest. First, pay attention to
your breathing for three breaths. [Pause.] Today, we will imagine the feelings we have when we’re successful at something. Think of something
you’ve done that made you feel good about yourself. [Pause.] Did you feel happy, proud, excited, or content? [Pause.] What does this emotion feel
like right now? [Pause.] What are the thoughts that go with your feeling of success? Do you think, “I did it!”? Whatever emotion you experience,
and however your body feels, is okay. Just notice those feelings. [Pause for about 30 seconds to allow practice.] Now, imagine yourself being
successful at doing something new or reaching a goal. Notice what your body feels, the emotions you have, and your thoughts. [Pause for about 30
seconds to allow practice.] Now, let’s take two breaths together. [Pause.] When you finish letting out the second breath, slowly open your eyes.
We are ready to move on to our lesson.

Optional Activity: Your Younger Self

5 MINS.

Start students on the Supplement 11.1 activity. This activity requires students to obtain a picture of
themselves at a younger age. Some students might forget and others might not have a copy to bring in to class.
If this is the case, students can close their eyes and imagine themselves, draw a picture, or list words to help
them describe themselves as they were at this younger age (at least 2 years younger). As an alternative or
supplement to the picture, you can have students bring in objects or things that were important to them at a
younger age.
Sample Script
Now, take out your picture of yourself at a younger age and look at it. What were you like then? What were your thoughts like? How did you
behave? How did you feel? How are you different today from the time when the picture was taken? Share your picture with someone sitting next
to you. Each of you, take 1 minute to talk about how you were then and how you are different now. [Pause. Then, after the partner activity,
allow some sharing out to the large group. Guide the discussion to focus on ways the students may have changed due to intentional and
healthy changes in daily behaviors; e.g., increase in skills.] Some changes are physical and are caused by getting older. But other changes are
caused by things we learn and things we choose to do from day to day. You might be better at some things than you were last year. How did that
happen? Probably not by chance! We change because of what we learn, feel, think, and do every day. When you think about yourself in the _____
grade [name a grade or two above the students], you probably don’t see yourself exactly the same way as you are today. How about now—do
you see yourself any differently? Are there things about yourself that you are able to change—that will help you grow stronger, healthier, or
smarter? What can you do today to be the person you want to be in [name the higher grade]? Next week? Next year? That’s what we’re going to
talk about today.

Key Terms and Definitions

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 11.2 as a handout to define the key terms that will be used in this lesson.
Sample Script
Here are some important terms that will help us understand healthy living and goal setting. We’ll define the words and discuss examples to
understand what they mean.

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Healthy Living Domains

15 MINS.
Use Supplement 11.3 as a handout to show students that there are many areas in our lives in which we can
develop healthy habits. Students will need red, green, and yellow colored pencils.
Sample Script
These circles represent the areas of our lives where we can be healthy. We are going to talk in more detail about what we’re doing in these areas.

Activity A: Healthy Living Domains

5 MINS.

Continue with the Supplement 11.3 handout. Ask students to think about each domain and the activities they
do for each and to record them on their worksheets. Examples may include getting enough sleep each night
(physical health), eating healthy foods (physical health), getting outside in nature (emotional health),
reframing thinking traps (emotional health), doing volunteer work (family and community), helping out a
brother or sister (family and community), being present or attentive in class (school), and completing their
homework (school).
Sample Script
We all have things we focus on a lot, and we all have other things we wish we paid more attention to. Here’s an activity that will help us figure
out the areas in our life where we focus most of our attention and the areas that could use more. Take out your Healthy Living Domains worksheet
and fill in the blanks with what you do now to keep healthy in each domain. For example, in the physical health area, if you eat well and get
enough sleep, you can put those in that area. If you help your brother or sister, you can put those activities in the family and community area. If you
come to class prepared, you can put that in the school area. If you are keeping a journal, you can put that in the emotional health area, and if you
volunteer in the community, you can put that in the family and community area. Then, use green to color the area with the most activities or those
that are the easiest for you to do. Use yellow to color two areas you do some things in but you would like to do more. Last, use red to color the area
with no activities or if you have things you’d like to start working on.

Relationships Among Healthy Living Domains

5 MINS.
Each healthy living domain has a relationship with the others. What we do in one domain affects the other domains.

Activity B: Interactions Among Healthy Living Domains

5 MINS.
Use the example in the Sample Script below, or another example to illustrate how making an improvement in
one area of your life can affect other areas. The example in the script illustrates how changes in a physical
domain can lead to changes within the school and emotional domains.
Sample Script
Did you know that if we make healthy choices in one area, they can affect other areas of your life too? Most times, what we do to improve one area
of our life can affect other areas of our life. That’s a bonus! Suppose Michael wants to improve his physical strength. He decides he wants to try out
for the basketball team at school. If he achieved his goal by trying out, doing his best, and making the team, how could some of the other circles be
affected?

Goal Setting: Introduction

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 5 MINS.
Goal setting is important to achieve what we want in life. There are ways to set goals that work well for us and
other ways that do not work well.
Sample Script
Setting goals is important to achieve what we want in our lives, and the way we set our goals can affect whether or not we achieve them. We’re
going to talk about some examples of successful goal setting and other times where it did not go so well.

Activity C: Examples and Nonexamples of Goal Setting

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 11.4 and the example from Activity B (Michael) and discuss examples and nonexamples of
goal setting and attainment.
Sample Script
Now let’s talk about examples of goal setting—how the goal was set and how it went. Remember Michael? He wanted to improve his physical
strength and try out for the basketball team. How do you think he got from the point where he was just thinking about the idea of physical strength
to actually making it onto the team? How do you think he set his goal? Let’s discuss what may have worked for him and what may not have
worked for him.

Setting Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Timely (SMART)

Goals

10 MINS.

Use Supplement 11.5 to introduce students to SMART goals. Setting SMART goals is a descriptive approach
designed to help people set more attainable goals.
Sample Script
Many people struggle to achieve their goals because they do not set SMART goals. Many people make the mistake of setting goals that are too
broad or vague and unrealistic or unattainable. Not us! Today, we will learn to create SMART goals. SMART goals are specific, measurable,
attainable, relevant, and timely objectives to help us achieve what we want. Let’s talk more about what SMART stands for.

Activity D: Steps to Setting and Attaining Goals

5 MINS.

Use Supplement 11.6 as a handout to review the four steps to setting and attaining goals. Use the examples
provided below, modify them to fit the needs and interests of your students, or ask students to generate their
own examples to individualize the content. As part of the discussion, introduce and dissect goals that do not
meet the SMART criteria, such as having prettier eyes or making someone like you.
Sample Script
1. Identify your goal area. Refer to your Healthy Living Domains worksheet [Supplement 11.3], and review the area you colored red. Identify a
specific action in that area for which you would like to create a SMART goal. For example, if your physical area is colored red, and you are often
tired, you may choose to create a goal to get better sleep.

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 Create a SMART goal. Create a goal that is specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and timely. Using my example from before, I might create
2.
this goal: “By the end of this month, I will get at least 8–9 hours of sleep each night, at least 5 days a week.”
3. Implement your plan. Write out a calendar. Tell someone you trust about your plan of action; it may turn out that someone you tell can play a role
in helping you to get to your goal. Perhaps a friend has a similar goal and you can support one another. Perhaps your parents can help you
implement your plan. Also, think about what could get in the way of your goal. Try to address possible obstacles early. Using my example, if I had a
friend who stays late playing video games, I might need to ask him or her to leave earlier so I could get to sleep earlier.
4. Check your progress. Is your plan working? Do you need to make changes? Are there other goals you want to start working on? Maybe you have
identified obstacles that are getting in your way that you need to address. Maybe you feel so much better that you decide to try to get 8–9 hours of
sleep every night. It can help to keep notes about our progress so we can see if our plan is working. With enough practice, many goals can become
healthy life habits; we may not need to think about them quite so much.
If you find you’re not making progress toward your goal, the important thing is to not give up! It takes energy and effort to change old habits and
behaviors, so if this is a worthy goal to strive for, we need to remember to have patience with ourselves. We can’t expect to change overnight. We all
face setbacks or make mistakes when striving toward new goals. Mistakes and setbacks can feel frustrating and make us feel like quitting. Actually, we
can reframe this as thinking that these are opportunities to learn and grow. When you see you aren’t making progress toward your goal, you can once
again be a scientist and look for evidence that will help you figure out what went wrong. You can ask yourself: Was my goal a SMART goal? Maybe
it was not specific. Maybe it wasn’t attainable or it was unrealistic. Or, did something unexpected get in the way? If so, what can I do to avoid this
next time? Are there things I can do or people I can talk to who can help me? How can I change my plan and try again?

Putting It All Together

10 MINS.

Use the following activity to practice the concepts discussed in this lesson. In small groups or individually, ask
students to use their Healthy Living Domains worksheet (Supplement 11.3) to identify a goal area and
generate their own SMART goals and action plan toward goal attainment. As necessary, prompt students
through the steps. After a few minutes, ask if any students want to share their goals. If students do not want
to share, that is okay. Continue sharing examples of steps and the overall process. Provide positive feedback
for students who shared examples. Emphasize that goal setting and increasing positive activities are important
as a means to a healthy life.
• Define SMART goals, goal setting, and goal attainment.
• List the steps to goal attainment.
Sample Script
Let’s practice what we’ve learned by putting it all together. Today, we learned more about the activities we do and about how we might want to
change them to live happier, healthier lives and be smarter. We learned to create SMART goals and learned a skill called goal attainment. I want
you all to get really good at setting and meeting goals so that it feels natural and easy. Let’s practice by creating our own SMART goals and action
plans.

Closure

2 MINS.
Close the lesson using a brief breathing activity and a reflection on the lesson content.
Sample Script
Let’s take a moment to regroup. Close your eyes and rest your hands in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor. Relax the muscles in your body and face.
Relax and soften your stomach muscles. Counting to 3, take a breath in slowly. Inhale the air down into your lungs. Feel your chest and stomach
expand like a balloon. [Pause.] Now, exhale, counting to 4. Feel your chest and stomach collapse as all the air exits your body. [Pause.] Again,
inhale deep into your lungs so that your stomach expands [Pause.] and exhale. [Pause.] Take a moment to think about something you learned
today that was important to you or you really liked. [Note to instructor: Pause for a moment to allow time for reflection.] Counting to 3,
take one more deep breath in slowly [Pause.] and exhale, counting to 4. [Pause.]

Tips for Transfer Training and Homework

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Use the ideas and activities in the following section to practice this lesson’s content with your students at other
times during the day. Also, remember to precorrect, remind, and reinforce concepts from this lesson in
activities throughout the school week and to encourage students to use the skills taught in this lesson across
settings including home, the bus, the cafeteria, and the community.

Additional Activities
• Letter: Ask students to write a letter to themselves with a SMART goal and the reasons why they made
the goal. Have students hand them in. Then, at the end of the Strong Kids program (or at some later date
as appropriate), return the letters to students and have them reevaluate their plans.
• Strength inventories: Hand out a sheet of paper with all the students’ names on it to each child, so that
each child has a list of all the students in their class. Ask students to write down a strength that they
sincerely associate with each student in the class. We recommend that students record their names at the
top of their lists to help instructors monitor for sarcastic or spiteful statements. When students are
finished with their lists, collect and review the statements, inventory the strengths, and share them so that
students can see themselves and their strengths in a new way. We recommend reviewing what students
have written about their peers before handing the comments back to the students.
• Resilience: Have students read books or watch videos that highlight perseverance and grit. Include famous
people who showed determination in the face of challenges (e.g., Malala Yousafzai).

Homework Handout

Pass out Supplement 11.7, Personal Goal Organizer. Explain to students that they are to complete a personal
goal organizer for home, school, and free time. Students will evaluate their SMART goals.

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SUPPLEMENT 11.1 LESSON 11: Creating Strong and SMART Goals

Your Younger Self

286
Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

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SUPPLEMENT 11.2 LESSON 11: Creating Strong and SMART Goals

Key Terms and Definitions

Goals
These are specific objectives that you want to achieve.
Example: Goals can be short term, like completing an assignment, and they can be long term, like
creating a new healthy living routine.

Goal setting
This is defining a goal and creating a plan of action to achieve that goal.
Example: I’d like to start going to bed 45 minutes earlier so I can get more sleep and feel better the next
day. I’ll start by going to bed 15 minutes earlier this week. Next week, I’ll go to bed 30 minutes earlier.

Goal attainment
This is completing your action plan and achieving your goal. Goal attainment helps us feel more
confident in our skills and abilities and helps us get what we want out of our lives.
Example: I am now going to bed 45 minutes earlier than I used to. I can tell it’s a little easier to get up
in the morning, and I’m focusing a little better during the day.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

288
SUPPLEMENT 11.3 LESSON 11: Creating Strong and SMART Goals

Healthy Living Domains

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

289
SUPPLEMENT 11.4 LESSON 11: Creating Strong and SMART Goals

Examples and Nonexamples of Setting Goals

Situation 1 (nonexample—no goal and no action)
Michael daydreams every day about his life after making the team.

Situation 2 (nonexample—no goal and ineffective action)

Michael draws basketballs and famous ball players while in class.

Situation 3 (nonexample—partial goal and action)

Michael makes a goal to find out when tryouts or practices will take place.

Situation 4 (example)
To increase his chances that he’ll make the team and to do his best, Michael makes a goal to spend at
least 4 hours a week practicing until the day of tryouts.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

290
SUPPLEMENT 11.5 LESSON 11: Creating Strong and SMART Goals

Setting SMART Goals

Smart goals are specific. Specific goals speak about the exact part of something that we are going to
address. “I’m going to be a nicer person,” would become, “I’m going to be more open to different
people by saying hello to someone new every day at lunch.”

SMART goals are measurable. Measurable goals mean that we choose things that can be compared
to how they used to be to see how much they have changed. “I’m going to be happier,” would
become, “I’m going to keep a gratitude journal and write down all the things that I am thankful for
every morning, at least 5 days a week.”

SMART goals are attainable. Attainable goals mean that the goal is something that could actually
happen because of something you do. It can be a waste of our energy to be bothered by something
we cannot change. “I’m going to get taller so I can play better volleyball” would have to change to
“I’m going to practice at least three times a week to get better at volleyball.”

SMART goals are relevant. Relevant goals connect with what we truly want and can lead to
healthier, happier lives. Getting a higher score on a video game probably won’t do much to help us
with our goals of physical fitness and meeting new people, but setting a goal to get outside and
connect with our friends more could help.

SMART goals are timely. We need a time frame to achieve our goals. “I am going to get stronger
by running 3 miles” may be specific, measurable, attainable, and relevant, but there is no time frame.
“I’m going to run 3 miles by 3 months from now” is a timely goal.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

291
SUPPLEMENT 11.6 LESSON 11: Creating Strong and SMART Goals

Steps to Setting and Attaining Goals

1. Identify your goal area from the healthy living domains: emotional health, physical health, school,
and family and community.
2. Create your SMART goal: specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and timely.
3. Implement your plan: Can someone help you? What might get in the way?
4. Check your progress: Are you on track to attain your goal? If not, investigate why. What changes do
you need to make?

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

292
SUPPLEMENT 11.7 LESSON 11: Creating Strong and SMART Goals

Personal Goal Organizer

Name (optional) ___________________________________________

Directions: Complete this personal goal organizer for your activities at home, in school, and during
your free time.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

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 Finishing UP!

SEL Competencies Addressed in This Lesson

Teacher Notes

Purpose and Objectives

To provide students with a review of major concepts and skills in the Strong Kids curriculum. In this lesson,
students will
1. Review Lessons 1–11 content
• Comfortable and uncomfortable feelings and distinguishing healthy and unhealthy ways to express
emotions

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 • How thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are connected
• The anger model and the problem-solving process
• How to set and attain SMART goals
• Common thinking traps and reframing them
• Signs of stress and strategies for managing stress
• Strategies for increasing habits for positive living
2. Develop an awareness of supports and safety networks.
• Identify when students need more help and support.
• Identify where to go for more help.
• Identify support systems that contribute to school and life success.
3. Enhance an understanding of resilience and persistence.
• Identify ways to persist in adversity.
• Understand the importance of social and emotional learning to healthy decision making.
4. Participate in the posttest (optional).
• Complete the posttest assessment (provide additional time if necessary).

Materials Needed
Supplement 12.1 (online download and handout)
Supplements 12.2–12.3 (handout)
Color markers and poster board for Activity B
Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 Certificate of Achievement (optional certificate)

Running Short on Time?

Suggested stopping points: end of Activity A and the Closure activity. When continuing the lesson, begin
with the Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity found in the Introduction section, then Activity B.

Instructor Reflection
We have now come to the end of Strong Kids—Grades 6–8, and your students have gained essential skills for
emotional, mental, social, and physical health. Think about the skills that you have taught your students
throughout this program. How can you continue to reinforce these important skills so your students continue
to practice them after the program ends? How can you encourage the development of these skills in your
students’ lives outside of this setting? Have you used any of these skills in your own life? If so, what
experiences and outcomes did you observe? Did you learn anything about yourself, your strengths, and your
weaknesses? What challenges in your professional or personal life might interfere with you reaching improved
social, emotional, behavioral, social, and physical health? How might you address these challenges proactively?
How can you prepare yourself to persist with your goals when you experience challenges? What goals do you
have for yourself and your students moving forward? What steps can you take today to move forward and
practice resilience when challenges come your way?
Note: If you have further concerns about how students may be coping with any social-emotional
difficulties, consider talking to your administrator/supervisor, school psychologist, or school counselor. It is
important to be familiar with your school’s/agency’s mental health referral process and community resources.

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Preparation
Prior to teaching the Finishing UP! lesson, it can be helpful to review Lessons 1–11 to refresh your memory.
Be familiar with names of those people at your school/agency who are there to support mental health
concerns. Students will also be asked to identify resources and safety networks at the end of the lesson. As
applicable, consider inviting your school’s primary mental health practitioner (school psychologist, counselor,
or other affiliated mental health provider) into your class to introduce him- or herself to your students.

Optional Posttest
If you conducted a pretest assessment before or during Lesson 1 and intend to conduct follow-up assessment
of Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 at the end of this lesson, you will need to reserve enough instructional time to do
so. If you do not intend to conduct a follow-up assessment, extend the instruction portion of the lesson with
review as needed. Refer to www.strongkidsresources.com for assessment recommendations. It is
recommended that the same tests from the preassessment be used to determine the effects of students’
participation in this curriculum.

Introduction

2-5 MINS.
This is the final lesson of Strong Kids—Grades 6–8. This lesson reviews all of the skills learned over the past
weeks while integrating these skills for emotional resilience. Students may complete a brief posttest to
measure what they learned. Emphasize that the skills learned from the curriculum are vital to students’ social
and emotional health, and there will be opportunities to use these skills throughout their lives. Students will
also engage in the final focusing activity of the program.
Sample Script
Today is our last lesson of the Strong Kids program and we will review all the important skills we’ve been talking about for the past few months.
We started each lesson with an activity to help us get started on the lesson and focus our minds. We also discussed how to understand our emotions
and those of the people around us, ways to take someone’s perspective, how to show empathy and respect, the importance of taking responsibility,
how to practice a positive attitude, how to reframe traps using evidence, ways to solve problems, how to set and attain goals, how to deal with
anger and stress, and how to create healthier daily habits. These skills support us when we have to deal with adversity. They help us practice
resilience and bounce back from problems we encounter in order to continue toward our goals. We will use some time today to talk about what to do
and whom to talk to if we need help. We will talk about how to persevere toward our goals even when we stumble. We will end with setting a
goal to keep practicing what we’ve learned so that we can continue to be emotionally and physically strong and healthy.

Mindfulness-Based Focusing Activity

2 MINS.
Sample Script
Let’s practice settling our bodies and focusing our minds. Close your eyes or look at a point on the floor or on your desk. Rest your hands
comfortably. Feel your feet on the floor or your hands as they rest. Pay attention to your breathing for three breaths. [Pause for three breaths.]
Let’s take a moment to practice some of the focusing activities we’ve worked on. First, notice the sounds you hear in the room, near and far. [Pause
for about 15 seconds.] Now, focus your attention on the feelings in your feet, legs, stomach, back, arms, shoulders, neck, and head. [Pause for
about 15 seconds.] Next, with a curious and kind mind, pay attention to the emotions you are having. Notice how they feel. [Pause for about
15 seconds.] Now, focus on your thoughts. Notice how they change. [Pause for about 15 seconds.] Remember, whatever you are experiencing is
okay. Now, let’s focus on our breath for a minute. [Pause for 1 minute to allow practice.] Now, let’s take two breaths together. [Pause.] When
you finish letting out the second breath, slowly open your eyes.

Activity A: Strong Kids Lesson Review and Discussion Questions

11-14 MINS.

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Use Supplement 12.1 as a handout to guide this activity. Have students get into small groups to quickly
review the lesson’s main ideas. Then, have students share their thoughts regarding the discussion questions
within their small groups. For each lesson, allow a leader to lead the discussion, then alternate to the next
leader to lead the next lesson review. Continue to rotate for each lesson thereafter, allowing each student to be
a leader. Allow 1–2 minutes for each lesson discussion. In order to keep things moving, you may wish to set a
timer that rings every 60–90 seconds per lesson to remind students to move to the next lesson.
Sample Script
We have learned so much by doing this program, so it’s important to discuss what you remember and how you will continue to use these important
skills. In small groups, identify someone in the group to be the leader to review the topics and discussion questions for the first lesson. The leader
will read the main ideas from each lesson from this handout. Then, the leader will briefly facilitate a discussion based on the questions listed. We
will only have about a minute to review each lesson, so you will need to be focused and efficient in your discussion. I will let you know when to
move to the next lesson review and discussion, then the next student leader leads the lesson review. Within your groups, you will rotate to allow all
students to be leaders. [Depending on the number of students in small groups, some may be a leader multiple times.]

Note: Keep students in small groups for the next activity.

Using Strong Kids Skills to Persevere Through Adversity

15 MINS.

Use Supplement 12.2 for this activity. Persevering through life’s challenges helps to develop resilience.
Encourage students to use the skills they’ve learned over the course of this program (e.g., positive thinking,
coping strategies, making healthy choices) to persevere through adversity in creating a rap, song, poem, dance,
and so forth.

Activity B: Design a Media Commercial and Emotional Resilience Slogan

40 MINS.

Show Supplement 12.2 as an example of slogans. Students will get into small groups and develop a 2- to 3-
minute media commercial advertising the importance of social-emotional development skills for student
success. Allow students to write their scripts on paper; role play; act out scenes; develop a song or rap, a poem,
a lyric, or a dance that is relevant to their commercial; and determine what they feel is important as a take-
away message. Emphasize considering what skills are needed to deal with challenging situations. As part of
the commercial, a resilience slogan will be developed to represent a saying or slogan that is memorable to the
students in learning the Strong Kids program (show Supplement 12.2 for slogan examples). Allow students to
use color markers and a poster board to create their slogan. Monitor the time to allow students to move
through different parts of this activity (e.g., 10 minutes to think and discuss their ideas, 15 minutes to put
their commercial together, 10 minutes to create their slogan poster). Then, come together and have groups
volunteer to share their commercial and poster slogan (allow 10 minutes total for all sharing).
Sample Script
This activity will require you to work together and be creative in your ideas. Use your summary handout or any handouts you think would be
helpful for your group. Within your group, you will develop a 2- to 3-minute media commercial about the importance of social and emotional
learning. Use words and terms that you’ve learned and think about the activities that we’ve done to help you come up with a take-away message.
Why should students know about becoming socially and emotionally strong? You are allowed to create a song, a rap, a poem, a dance, a lyric, a
role-play scene, a riddle or rhyme, or a speech. Your commercial will be what your group feels is important to be successful in life. You will also
create a slogan to represent your commercial. [Show Supplement 12.2 slogan examples.] Here are some example slogans for you to reference. You

298
 will be given a poster board and color markers to create your slogan. I will monitor the time and allow 10 minutes for group thinking and
discussion, 15 minutes for putting together your commercial, and 10 minutes for creating the poster slogan. Afterward, we will come together and
share our commercials. [Allow students time for any questions.]

Support Systems and Knowing When to Get Help

5 MINS.
Students may require additional assistance and support when faced with life’s challenges. Encourage them to
be proactive by knowing to whom they can turn in advance of any crisis. Ensure that they are able to identify
the school personnel, personal safety networks, and community organizations that can be helpful.
Sample Script
We will talk about how to know when we might need help and things you can do if you feel like you need more help or support. There are resources
available, and knowing who they are now, before you have any need for them, will help improve your chances of getting help quickly if you ever
need it.

Activity C: When to Seek Help

2 MINS.
Explain to students that they have learned important skills during this program but that these skills may not
be enough help for all of the possible problems they might have. They may require other adults to be involved
or they may need professional help. Encourage a discussion of when to seek help. Emphasize awareness of
their thoughts, emotions, and behaviors and the intensity of their problems by using the skills they have
learned from Strong Kids. Encourage students to share their concerns with an adult they trust. In addition,
encourage them to be aware of others’ emotions and challenges so that they can suggest resources to their
peers.
Sample Script
At times, a problem can be too much for us to handle on our own, and sometimes our emotional issues can turn into serious problems like anxiety or
depression. If a problem ever gets serious, there are people you can turn to for help. A problem is serious when it gets in the way of you being able to
do the things you like to do or you need to do, like having healthy relationships and getting your work done. So, if you feel like life is feeling really
difficult, you’re having a hard time knowing what to do, some of the not-so-good or unhelpful ideas are coming to mind, or nothing is working to
make you feel better, this is when you want to ask an adult you trust for help. For example, if you don’t get asked to the school dance or feel rejected
by someone, and you are sad for days and cannot eat or sleep, or you don’t want to leave the house, this is when you may want to talk to someone to
help you feel better. It’s also important for you to be aware of how your friends are feeling and what kinds of challenges they are going through.
Remember, we talked about cues and paying attention to those cues so that you can be a support to others or encourage them to talk to someone.
There are adults here at school who can help you and your classmates.

Activity D: List of Resources

3 MINS.

Use Supplement 12.3 as a handout. Have students think about and list the adults and other individuals they
trust and can talk to at school, at home, and in the community. Help students generate names if they can’t
think of any (e.g., parent, other adult family members, a close adult friend or neighbor, clergy, principal,
teacher, counselor, school psychologist). Have students also identify community resources or organizations
that also can be helpful when needed. Be familiar with your school’s mental health referral process in case
students have questions or if you ever need to make a referral.
Sample Script
Use this handout to discuss and write down the adults in your life whom you trust and can go to for help. If you do not know anyone to contact, I
will help you and give you some names of people who can support you. These people care about you and they want you to be well and help you to
participate in life more fully. It is also important to know the resources within your community and identify them before you ever need them (e.g.,

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 clergy). Can someone share what other resources are in our community? [Allow time for sharing.] When you are in a situation and you need
someone to talk to or you have problems, look at this handout. Keep it in a safe place so that you can use it when needed.

Optional Assessments

15-20 MINS.
If you administered pretests from the Strong Kids web site during Lesson 1, now is the time to administer
these tests again so that you can determine how effective Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 was at increasing students’
knowledge and enhancing their emotional resilience. It will take approximately 15–20 minutes to take these
tests.

Putting It All Together

5 MINS.

Reiterate the importance of perseverance and overcoming adversity. Encourage students to continue to reflect
on the Strong Kids skills to help them through life’s challenges. Use Supplement 12.1 to review any last
comments or questions from the lesson discussion. Facilitate discussion on which Strong Kids skills can be
used to build resilience. Allow time to hand out certificates for participation in Strong Kids if you choose to
give certificates.
Sample Script
Let’s practice what we’ve learned by putting it all together. Today, we reviewed everything we learned in this program and talked about
emotional resilience and dealing with adversity. In the review activity we did earlier, are there any questions or comments about the key points
from the lessons? [Allow time for students to share.] Believe it or not, we will continue to work on these skills throughout our entire lives. Some
days will be better than others. But, by learning about and practicing the concepts in these lessons, you are preparing yourself to cope well and have
a healthy and productive life. Which Strong Kids skills would be helpful to build resilience when challenges arise? [Allow time for students to
share.] As we have worked through the program, we have shared stories with each other. Remember that stories are personal, and even though
today is the last day of the lessons, we will remember not to share each other’s stories with anyone outside of the group. By keeping other people’s
stories to yourself, you will be respecting others. Congratulations on finishing Strong Kids! Your skills have built up your emotional strength, and
they will continue to be valuable as you become an adult. [Optional: Hand out Strong Kids Certificates.]

Closure

2 MINS.
Close the lesson using a brief breathing activity and a reflection on the lesson content.
Sample Script
Let’s take a moment to regroup. Close your eyes and rest your hands in your lap. Feel your feet on the floor. Relax the muscles in your body and face.
Relax and soften your stomach muscles. Counting to 3, take a deep breath in slowly. Inhale the air down into your lungs. Feel your chest and
stomach expand like a balloon. [Pause.] Now, exhale, counting to 4. Feel your chest and stomach collapse as all the air exits your body. [Pause.]
Again, inhale deep into your lungs so that your stomach expands [Pause.] and exhale. [Pause.] Take a moment to think about something you
learned today that was important to you. [Note to instructor: Pause for a moment to allow time for reflection.] Counting to 3, take one more
deep breath in slowly [Pause.] and exhale, counting to 4. [Pause.]

Tips for Transfer Training

Use the ideas and activities in the following section to practice the Strong Kids content with your students after
completing the program. Also, remember to precorrect, remind, and reinforce concepts from the lessons in

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activities throughout the school week, and encourage students to use the skills taught in this lesson across
settings including home, the bus, in the cafeteria, and in the community.

Additional Activities
• Have students create a dream board of pictures or a word collage of their dreams and the ways the skills
learned in this program can help them achieve their dreams, goals, and aspirations.
• Have students perform research or an Internet search on community resources that are available in their
area. They could interview the school psychologist or school social worker.
• Have students make school posters on emotional resilience and showcase them at an assembly or hang
them in the office/hallway.
• Have students write a letter to the people in their support circle and explain how these people can help
them. Encourage students to share their letter(s) with those individuals.

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SUPPLEMENT 12.1 LESSON 12: Finishing UP!

Strong Kids Lesson Review and Discussion

Questions
Lesson 1: About Strong Kids: Emotional Strength Training (introduction to the program, learning the
rules of the group, and beginning to learn about emotions)
• Key terms: resilience, adversity, and perseverance
• We all have emotions, every day, and everywhere we are. Emotions are like signals that tell
us something about our situation.
• There are different emotions that we all have, and we can experience more than one emotion
at the same time (refer to list of emotions/faces).

Discussion questions
1. What emotions have you noticed and learned about by participating in this program?
2. Provide an example situation that brought out an emotion. How did you recognize your
emotion?

Lessons 2 and 3: Understanding Your Emotions 1 and 2 (there are physical feelings that go along with
our emotions; there are thoughts and behaviors or actions that go along with our emotions)
• Key terms: emotions, thoughts, behaviors, action, respect/respectful, disrespect/disrespectful,
physical feelings, comfortable, uncomfortable, emotional intensity, resilience, adversity, and
perseverance
• Emotions can be physical and are linked to thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.
• Emotions can range from comfortable (happy, excited) to uncomfortable (worried,
frustrated), and we can gauge these emotions on an intensity scale.
• We can respond to emotions in helpful ways to match our situation and our social needs.

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Discussion questions
1. What emotions feel comfortable to you, and what emotions feel uncomfortable? What
emotions feel both comfortable and uncomfortable?
2. How might you express emotions at home? In the cafeteria? With friends? With a teacher?

Lesson 4: Understanding Other People’s Emotions (noticing other people’s perspectives and showing
empathy)
• Key terms: empathy, sympathy, social clues, and perspective
• We can learn how to notice other people’s feelings, how to try to understand other people’s
feelings better, and how to begin to see a situation from another person’s perspective.

Discussion questions
1. What can you look for to give you clues about how someone might be feeling?
2. What kinds of information can help you take another person’s perspective?

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Lesson 5: Dealing with Anger (identify and manage angry emotions)
• Key terms: anger, aggression, anger management, perspective/point of view, response, and
reaction
• Anger is a natural emotion that we all have, and it can be the result of a mixture of other
upsetting emotions.
• When anger is unmanaged, it can lead to some not-so-good decisions, from holding it in to
showing aggression.

Discussion questions
1. Do you think all people experience anger in the same way?
2. What are some helpful anger management strategies? Have you used any of these strategies?
Which strategies worked best for you?

Lesson 6: Clear Thinking 1 (identify when our thoughts get stuck in thinking traps)
• Key terms: thoughts, self-talk, emotions, reactions, and thinking traps
• Thoughts influence emotions and behaviors.
• It is helpful to develop an awareness of our own thoughts and identify common thinking
traps.

Discussion questions
1. What are thinking traps, and why is it important to be aware of them?
2. How are thoughts, emotions, and behavior related?

Lesson 7: Clear Thinking 2 (strategies we can use to think about other perspectives in a situation)
• Key terms: evidence and reframing
• We can develop the ability to notice or observe our thoughts.
• We can learn how to spot thinking traps, get out of them early, and keep them from
snowballing by reframing.

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Discussion questions
1. Think of a time when you or someone you know was stuck in a thinking trap. How did you
know it was a thinking trap? What was the evidence? Did it snowball or grow and become a
bigger trap?
2. Did you or the person reframe the thinking trap to get unstuck? If so, how? If not, how could
you or the person have reframed it to get unstuck earlier?

Lesson 8: Solving People Problems (ways to solve problems and get along with others)
• Key terms: responsible, attitude, conflict, problem solving/conflict resolution, resolution, and
resolve
• Conflict is an unavoidable part of life, so it’s important to know how to deal with it
effectively.
• We can use the four-step problem-solving model and examples and nonexamples of problem
solving.
• We can make responsible and respectful choices in solving conflicts with others.

Discussion questions
1. Conflict is a natural part of life, but sometimes we try to avoid it. Other times we might
overreact. How have you handled conflict, and how could you apply the four-step problem-
solving model to the situation?
2. How might showing empathy or taking another person’s perspective help you when you are
in conflict with another person?

Lesson 9: Letting Go of Stress (strategies we can use to deal with stress in our lives)
• Key terms: stress, helpful or healthy stress, unhelpful or unhealthy stress, situational triggers,
relaxation, realistic or unrealistic expectations, and common signs of stress
• There are ways to identify healthy and unhealthy stress and stress triggers before you feel
stressed out.
• We can learn the difference between helpful and unhelpful options and techniques for
managing stress, and we can learn to tell realistic from unrealistic expectations.

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Discussion questions
1. What are your triggers and signs of stress in your life?
2. What are some strategies for managing stress early on, before getting too stressed out?

Lesson 10: Positive Living (things we can do to live a positive and healthy life)
• Key terms: habit, moderation, attitude, and choice
• Our behaviors and actions can contribute to a healthy and positive lifestyle in the long term.
• We can learn the differences between examples (helpful) and nonexamples (unhelpful) of life
choices that can affect our lives at home, at school, and in the community.

Discussion questions
1. What are some activities or actions that energize us, motivate us, and make us happier in the
long term?
2. What are some healthy living activities that you do now and healthier habits that you can
create?

Lesson 11: Setting Strong and SMART Goals (setting goals and doing things that will help us lead a
healthy life)
• Key terms: goals, goal setting, goal attainment, and healthy living
• It is important to increase and maintain positive activities.
• Set SMART goals and monitor your progress.

Discussion questions

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1. What are SMART goals?
2. What are some ways we can identify areas of our lives in need of SMART goals?
3. How can we improve the chances that we will attain our goals?

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

307
SUPPLEMENT 12.2 LESSON 12: Finishing UP!

Resilience Example Slogans

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

308
SUPPLEMENT 12.3 LESSON 9: Letting Go of Stress

Helping Resources Handout

List the important resources that you can turn to if you need some help or someone to talk to. Include
their phone numbers, too. If you do not have their numbers, try to obtain them within the next week
or so. Having this information readily available can be very helpful. After you’ve completed this form,
keep it in a safe place so that you can get to it when/if needed.

When I need help or someone to talk to, I will contact one of these people:
This person at home supports me and I can talk to him/her for help: ________________________

This friend supports me and I can talk to him/her for help:

_____________________________________

This adult at school supports me and I can talk to him/her for help:
_________________________________________

This person in the community supports me and I can talk to him/her for help:
_________________________________

This is an organization/community resource in my area that I can go to for help:

______________________________

Remember that your school administrators, counselors, and teachers will know what to do or to whom
you can talk if you need help.

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

309
Certificate of Achievement LESSON 12: Finishing UP!

Certificate of Achievement
Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 Certificate of Achievement
Awarded to

____________________________

for participating in
The Strong Kids Curriculum

Resilience and emotional knowledge

are the keys to success!

Instructor _________________
Date __________________

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Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

311
SECTION III

312
Appendices

313
APPENDIX A

314
 Strong Kids Knowledge Test for Students in Grades
6–8

INSTRUCTIONS FOR TEACHERS/GROUP LEADERS

The Strong Kids Knowledge Test is a 20-item assessment tool designed to measure students’ knowledge of
social and emotional concepts and coping strategies; it is based on content from the curriculum. The
Knowledge Test may be used to measure how effective Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 is in increasing students’
knowledge of social-emotional concepts and coping strategies. If you choose to use the Knowledge Test as a
pre- and posttest measure, you should administer it before the first lesson (Lesson 1) and again after the last
lesson (Lesson 12). Most students can complete the entire Knowledge Test in about 20 minutes. Some
students (especially younger students and those students with reading problems) may have difficulty
understanding the Knowledge Test and may require assistance (e.g., having the teacher read the items out
loud or be available to answer questions about specific words) in completing it.

HOW TO SCORE THE KNOWLEDGE TEST

An answer key is included for the Knowledge Test. The key lists the correct answers for each of the 20 items,
along with the lesson from which the question was drawn. To score students’ tests, compare the students’
actual answers to those in the key and place an X or other mark by every answer that is incorrect. Each item
that has a correct answer should be given 1 point, and the final tally of correct answers can be converted into a
percentage of correct responses. For example, if a student correctly answered 17 of 20 questions, his or her raw
score would be 17 and the percentage correct would be 85%.

HOW TO USE THE TEST SCORES

To compare posttest scores to pretest scores, subtract the pretest total score from the posttest total score for
each of the two tests. The difference reflects how much change occurred from the beginning to the end of the
curriculum. Ideally, participation in Strong Kids—Grades 6–8 will result in an increase in knowledge from
pretest to posttest (i.e., the posttest scores will be greater than the pretest scores).

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APPENDIX A

Strong Kids Knowledge Test for

Students in Grades 6–8

Name _______________________ Grade __________ Age ________________

School ___________________________ Today’s date ________________

On the next few pages, you will be asked to answer questions to see how much you know about
feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. Read each question carefully and choose what you think is the best
answer to each question. You may not know the answers to all the questions and you may not have
heard some of the words before, but try your best. You will not be graded on your answers. If you have
any questions, please ask your teacher.

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TRUE or FALSE
Read each sentence. If you think it is true or mostly true, circle the word True. If you think it is false or
mostly false, circle the word False.

1. True False Clenched fists and trembling or shaking hands can be signals that tell us to stop and use
strategies to problem solve through a situation.

2. True False Emotions feel the same for everyone.

3. True False Stress can be caused by comparing yourself to other people because you think they’re
doing better than you.

4. True False The way we show how we feel can change depending on who we are with or where we
are.

5. True False Feeling uncomfortable is normal and to be expected.

6. True False There are physical feelings or sensations that often happen when we have emotions.

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MULTIPLE CHOICE
Circle the letter that goes along with the best answer for each question.

7. An example of an emotion that feels uncomfortable for most people is

a. Hopeful
b. Frustrated
c. Curious
d. Excited

8. What is an emotion?
a. A thought you have about a situation
b. Your inner voice inside your head
c. A memory you have about something that happened to you
d. A feeling that tells you something about a situation

9. Self-talk can be a way to calm down after you get angry. Helpful self-talk might include telling
yourself
a. I don’t deserve this
b. I should get angry when something like this happens
c. I can work through this
d. I hope I never see this person ever again

10. Which of the following statements best describes empathy?

a. Knowing how you are feeling
b. Not knowing why another person is feeling sad
c. Understanding how another person may be feeling based on your own similar experiences
d. Wanting another person to feel better soon

11. Your thoughts can become traps when

a. You see things in a way that is unhelpful or keeps you stuck
b. You see both the good and bad in each situation
c. You think something different from your friend
d. You think about how another person might feel

12. Reframing is a way to

a. Make new friends
b. Think about how you can ignore the situation
c. Think about a situation differently
d. Make sure someone gets in trouble for what he or she has done

13. Why would you want to know how someone else is feeling?
a. So you can leave that person alone when he or she is angry
b. To better understand and support that person
c. To tell other people about that person

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 d. To act the same when you are together

14. Conflict resolution is best described as

a. Discussing a problem until there is a winner and a loser
b. Arguing with another person until he or she sees your point and gives in
c. Problem solving so you can reach an agreement that is respectful and responsible for all
involved
d. Talking about the problem until something changes the other person’s mind

15. Which of the following is a positive or helpful way to handle being anxious when you have to show
a bad grade to someone like your parent (or guardian)?
a. Tell him or her why you are anxious and that you will work harder next time.
b. Hide your grade and hope he or she will forget about it.
c. Be sad and angry with yourself and stay in your room.
d. Say that your grades were bad because other kids at school distracted you.

16. Which of the following is a helpful way to deal with a problem when you are feeling stressed?
a. Cry somewhere quietly.
b. Talk about the problem with someone you trust, such as a friend or teacher.
c. Throw things around.
d. Ignore the problem.

17. Which of the following is a helpful way to handle your emotions in class when your neighbor’s
talking begins to annoy you?
a. Yell at that person and tell him or her to stop.
b. Call out to the teacher about the student.
c. Stare at the person until he or she knows you’re annoyed.
d. Stop and breathe deeply.

18. If you’re feeling tired and low in energy, and you’re having a hard time enjoying yourself even
though things are mostly fine in your life, you could try
a. Eating healthy meals
b. Getting more sleep
c. Spending time outdoors
d. Spending time with friends
e. Any of the above

19. An important step toward achieving goals is knowing how to set them. Which of the following is
not an important part of a SMART goal?
a. Specific
b. Timely
c. Abstract
d. Measurable

20. Your friend seems upset. You want to show your friend that you care about what he or she is
feeling. The most helpful way to do this is to

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a. Talk about something completely different that happened to you to change the subject
b. Listen and show that you are paying attention
c. Talk about something else
d. Look away and don’t say anything

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

320
APPENDIX A

Strong Kids Knowledge Test for Students in

Grades 6–8 Answer Key
Correct answers for each of the 20 items are listed below. The Strong Kids lesson to which the question
corresponds is indicated in parentheses.

1. T (Lesson 2)
2. F (Lesson 1)
3. T (Lesson 9)
4. T (Lesson 8)
5. T (Lesson 2)
6. T (Lesson 3)
7. b (Lesson 2)
8. d (Lesson 1)
9. c (Lesson 6)
10. c (Lesson 4)
11. a (Lesson 6)
12. c (Lesson 7)
13. b (Lesson 4)
14. c (Lesson 8)
15. a (Lesson 3)
16. b (Lesson 9)
17. d (Lesson 5)
18. e (Lesson 10)
19. c (Lesson 11)
20. b (Lesson 4)

Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

321
APPENDIX B

Basic Fidelity Checklist

INSTRUCTIONS For each section, check the box if the lesson component was completed. If no
items were implemented, check “Not” for not implemented. If some items were implemented, but not
all, check “Partial” for partially implemented. If all items were implemented, check “Full” for fully
implemented. In the Notes column, record the reason(s) for incomplete implementation of the
component. In the Lesson Notes row, describe conditions that may have affected the fidelity for the
lesson overall. Include any modifications made to the lessons.

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Merrell’s Strong Kids—Grades 6–8: A Social and Emotional Learning Curriculum, Second Edition, by Dianna
Carrizales-Engelmann, Laura L. Feuerborn, Barbara A. Gueldner, and Oanh K. Tran.
Copyright © 2016 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

327