Voices of Autumn and Winter

Asking Older Adults to Articulate Spirituality and Religion

Hailey Lynne McKeefry

06/12/99
Independent Study
June Gerbracht
Introduction

Discussions of spirituality and aging have traditionally focused on the challenges

and burdens that that population places on the church and its resources—an important

consideration, but one that often puts the cart before the horse. A more logical starting

point might be how older adults in our church define and identify their own attitudes

about spirituality and religion. From there, it is easier to begin to evaluate both the needs

of this growing segment of our church as well as the talents, ministry and wisdom that

they have to offer the institution.

It can be argued that by looking at the needs of the elderly, we are really just

asking them to help those of us with less experience to articulate what all people are

looking for in spirituality and religion. "The spiritual needs of the aging really are those

of every person, writ large: the need for identity, meaning, love and wisdom... Basic

needs do not change with age, but they are often intensified." (Preamble, The Section on

Spiritual Well-Being, White House Conference on Aging, 1971.)

Over the next several decades, the elderly will become a much larger portion of

the population. “Maturity and old age are becoming almost universal human experiences.

Within the past fifty years, life spans in excess of seventy years have become the norm in

the United States and Western Europe. Before another century has elapsed, such long

lives will the usual almost everywhere.” 1

There is little question then that, for a variety of reasons, the aging population

should be of paramount concern to ministers, clinicians and others…but there is an

intrinsic problem that is very difficult to solve. If we say that religion and spirituality are

1
Robb, Thomas B., Growing Up: Pastoral Nurture for the Later Years, p.105.
beneficial to the well being of the older adult, then we must face the problematic task of

defining a huge number of terms, including religion, spirituality, older and well-being.

For the purposes of this paper, I decided to address the first two: spirituality and religion,

and try to ascertain what those terms meant to active older (65 years plus) women who

are already active in the Episcopal church.

The Statistics

A look at census materials and aging trends in United States provide a concrete

reason for attention to aging as a concern within our church. Currently, there are only

about thirty million people over the age of 65 years old in the United States, but in the

next twenty to thirty years that number will more than double, to as many as 70 million in

all.2

By the year 2030, there will be more than three times as many Americans over the

age of 65 than there were in 1970. Earlier in our history, in the 1790 Census, only one out

of every fifty in the population were over 65, while by 1900 one out of every twenty five

adults in America were over “retirement age.” In the 1980 census, the population

increased by nine percent while the number of people over the age of 65 jumped by 23

percent and the number of those over age 85 leaped 67 percent. In addition, younger age

groups will grow more slowly or not at all. 3

These trends are mirrored in church congregations, with the proportion of older

adults rising steadily and promising to continue into the foreseeable future. In fact, the

church currently looks very much like society is predicted to look in two to three decades.

2
“Looming Health Crisis”, an interview with Harold Koenig, on KLNS radio .
http://john.org/KNLS/webfile/explor02.html
3
Robb, Thomas B., Growing Up: Pastoral Nurture for the Later Years, p.111.
“One fifth to one fourth of the total membership of many denominations is now over the

age of sixty five. In many congregations one half to two thirds of the membership is

elderly.”4

Methodology

In defining the parameters of this paper, I was forced to recognize the inherent

problems in trying to discuss and measure spiritual topics. The biggest challenge, in

many ways, is semantics. There is no single definition of spirituality, for example, that

works for every individual. “Much of the literature on the relation between religion,

spirituality, and well-being is flawed by measuring and defining variables.” 5

Despite these challenges, though, and for the purposes of exploring some of the

issues discussed above, I decided to formulate a group of questions, based on a literature

review, with an eye to isolating some of the attitudes that older people have about

spirituality and aging.

I interviewed at some length half-a-dozen women. All of these women are in

some way involved with the Episcopal Church, either through their work or worship. All

were over sixty-five years of age, although they represented a variety in terms of

ethnicity, marital status, parish affiliation and experience. (See Appendix A for basic

profiles of those interviewed)

In conversations that lasted between 20 minutes and one hour, I asked these

women to discuss how they define “spirituality” and “religion” and how that has evolved

over their lifetime. Further, I asked them to talk about any times that they felt God was

working in their lives. Often these discussions evolved into discussions that asked those

4
Ibid., p.106.
5
Kimble, McFadden, Ellor, and Seeber [editors], Aging, Spirituality and Religion: A Handbook, p. 5.
interviewed to express their general views and to further illuminate using stories from

their own lives. (See Appendix B for specific questions.)

My sampling of interviewees is not at all random—all of those interviewed are

heavily involved in organized religion in some way and most are still active in the parish

setting. None were confined to home or nursing facility—all were in good health and still

reasonably physically active and self-reliant.

I did not attempt to bring together a group representing a particular profile—for

example, those interviewed were a combination of black and white; single and married;

retired and still working; and cradle born Episcopalians and converted. Therefore, this

paper does not intend to explore the attitudes about spirituality and religion of older

people in general, or to discuss the reasons that older people may choose to abandon there

faith altogether. It does not hope to discover any sort of universal trend about older

people in the church.

However, it does hope to examine in a concrete way, using examples from these

conversations and writings in the field, how we as a church might start to recognize the

wisdom and discernment of some of our older members. We must also ask ourselves how

the presence of these should shape the ministry that we as a church do and how it should

impact the way that minister to them as a group.

Literature Review

In reading for this paper, I read the work of many of the experts in the field of

religion, spirituality and aging. Harold Koenig, Director of the Duke University Center

for the Study of Religion and Health, for example, is a pioneer in this field and has

written numerous articles and books on the topic of spirituality, health and aging. He puts
forth a biopsychosocial-spiritual model of health and aging. This approach seeks to

integrate all aspects of a human being and his or her world (including biological,

psychological, spiritual and interpersonal) when considering health and aging issues.

Koenig says that scientific knowledge must be combined with logic, reasoning and

rational understanding in order to learn more about how human beings work.

His scientific work points to how the religious and spiritual dimensions of human

experience interact directly and concretely with the material dimensions (mental and

physical health, for example). Says Koenig, “We have found greater well-being, lower

rates of depression, less anxiety, and less incidence of alcoholism among persons who

rely heavily on their religious faith to cope with adversity. This is particularly true among

older persons who are disabled and ill. Lower blood pressure, fewer strokes, and lower

rates of cancer have also been found among those who frequently attend church.” 6

Although considered valuable, Koenig’s work has been challenged based upon the

definition and measure of variables within the framework of his research—a problem

mentioned earlier in this paper.

Jeffrey Levin and Sheldon Tobin tackled these issues both with an eye toward

both how the research is done and how it is applied. These two scholars applied a critical

eye toward the ways of studying the relationship between religion and health that was

discovered by Koenig. For example, some say that those who attend church are healthier,

and yet it may well be that declining health reduces church attendance and reduces

feelings of well being rather than the other way around. “They urge researchers to

explore what older persons older beliefs actual mean to them, a task that will require
social scientists to understand a wide diversity of beliefs in order to be able to ask the

correct questions.”7

These writers strove to redefine psychological well-being in new ways, and to

differentiate it from subjective well being (which refers to personal evaluations of self

esteem, morale, etc.) and objective well being (which refers to concrete observable

conditions such as financial and health situations). They were concerned that objective

well being often did not match the subject’s subjective assessment of their own situations.

A number of other scholars, including Kenneth Pargament, Kimberly Van

Haitsma and David Ensing take the next step in the study of the relationship between

religion/spirituality, aging and health by looking at the issue of coping in later life.

Traditionally, coping was considered merely a response to the fundamental human need

to have meaning in life. These writers, however, enriched this view by looking at the

effects of religious belief, while still trying to warn against the danger of making

sweeping and unfounded generalizations about the benefits of religious beliefs on their

ability to cope with life changes.

Robert Atchley put forth a continuity theory that states that people adapt to life

changing circumstances and yet still manage to maintain longstanding patterns of dealing

with the world and of making sense of the subjective world. “The continuity theory of

aging was created to help explain a paradox. On the one hand, aging often produces

modest physical and mental losses and significant social losses…these losses occur

within an ageist society and culture. Older people as a social category are set aside; not

6Hsu, Teresa. 1995. Religion and Mental Health: An Interview with Dr. Harold Koenig. Vertices 10(2):
52-54.
7
Kimble, McFadden, Ellor, and Seeber [editors], Aging, Spirituality and Religion: A Handbook, p. 5.
recruited, wanted, needed or appreciated by employers or community

organizations….despite all this most older people are not overwhelmed by negativity.” 8

Meanwhile, Linda Vogel created a developmental approach that asserts the

importance of recognizing the different life circumstances of elders—she contends that

frail elders may have different ways of securing meaning in their lives than able elders.

She looked at ways in which older adults make meaning and find ways of nourishing

their souls and differentiates heavily from the same process in younger people. Older

adults value ego differentiation and transcendence of ego and body.

Finally, Harry Moody expands on and challenges Vogel’s theories—he says that

ego transcendence is the highest level of human development rather than ego integrity.

He argues that mysticism, rather than a Western rationalistic approach, may work best for

older people.9 Many authors have said that mysticism is distinctly a gift of old age

because older people are able to cultivate quietness and inwardness that are necessary to

make these types of experiences possible.

Religion

Both in the conversations that I had with individuals and in reading on the topic,

that religion is a verb—and is talked about in terms of outward action. “The term religion

is usually defined as the outward and visible signs of faith in a person’s life…religion has

both doctrinal and mystical elements…[It] is described in scripture in terms of action or

‘doing’.”10

8
Ibid., p. 69
9
Ibid, p.6.
10
Koenig, Harold G., and Lamar, Tracy, A Gospel for the Mature Years: Finding Fulfillment by Knowing
and Using Your Gifts, p. 14.
 There is no doubt that religion is important to many older people—and that

religious devotion comes in many forms including participation in prayer, worship and

study. Christianity in particular offers a variety of unique characteristics that,

theologically, provide coping mechanisms for older adults intrinsically facing the process

of loss and aging.

“In [Christianity], there is a focus on a personal relationship with a

Supreme Being who is not just a distant kind of god who's out there and
not interested. Christians believe in a personal God who cares about
people, who has a purpose and a plan for every individual, and who is
concerned about suffering and really wants the best for every person.
That's really something unique; there's no other religion I am aware of
with this belief--that there is a personal God that's separate from Creation
who is really interested in every individual person and wants to interact
with and be involved in people's lives. Knowing this provides people with
the sense that they're not alone, that there's somebody on their side. 11

This is a vital distinction—that Christians believe in a personal God that cares…

and it is a theme that arose again and again in the interviews that I conducted. Although

those interviewed generally seemed to generally define “religion” in the realm of

organized religion and the sphere of activities associated with that, it was activity that

was a response to a relational God that they had experienced in concrete ways in their

lives.

Maria (68), for example, said that she saw religion as “giving back to the

community.” Ada (80) said that religion is “the way that your worship daily…the feeling

of having God in your life,” adding that after embracing her religion, “I found myself

being more patient.” Others spoke about singing in the choir, organizing the coffee hour,

visiting shut-ins or working in an altar guild, for example, as being religious activities.

11
Hsu, Teresa. 1995. Religion and Mental Health: An Interview with Dr. Harold Koenig. Vertices 10(2):
52-54.
 Older adults in particular often use the activities of religion to help them cope and

thrive. In fact, approximately three-quarters of people over the age of sixty say that

religion is very important to them, and in the southeastern United States, that figure rises

to almost 90 percent. Other statistics suggest that at least half of older Americans go to

church or synagogue services on a weekly or more often basis and that one-third to one

half participate in some form of personal prayer. About one quarter of people over fifty

report that they read the bible on a daily basis, compared to about half that figure for

younger individuals. Sixty percent of older adults say that they believe that the Bible is

the inspired word of God. Another 40 percent view religious television programs several

times a week.12

Women, studies have found, are often more dependant upon religion than men.

For example, in one study, two-third of older women spontaneously noted that religion

had helped them to cope, compared to only one third of older men. 13 And even as church

attendance declines, for those over the age of seventy-five, the decline is less notable for

women than it is for men.14

Many of those interviewed, when asked to speak about what religion meant to

them, automatically began retelling the story of some life-changing event—the birth or

death of a child, a divorce or widowing, or the loss of a job or a health setback. “In times

of great struggle, religion is often revealed for what it truly is…. Perhaps that is also why

so many of the greatest religious dramas are played out by those in the later years of life.

These are pivotal times, when people of greatest maturity meet situations of greatest

12
Kimble, McFadden, Ellor, and Seeber [editors], Aging, Spirituality and Religion: A Handbook, p.12.
13
Ibid., p. 13.
14
Clements, William M. [ed.], Ministry With the Aging: Designs, Challenges, Foundations, p. 159.
challenge. It is in these moments that people from the abstractions of a religion in theory

to the concreteness of a religion of action.”15

In speaking about hard times in their lives, the women that I interviewed talked

about how their parish families and their pastoral leaders responded to their situation,

how attending church kept them going, how their prayers and other devotional activities

had prepared them to find meaning in their lives despite hard times.

Spirituality

Although concrete service activities were most often seen as religious, prayer and

meditation were firmly planted under the heading of spirituality. This is just the tip of the

proverbial iceberg—in trying to articulate spirituality, people are often trying to put into

words something much deeper and more profound than spiritual activities. Fisher sums it

up rather nicely:

“The term ‘spiritual’ can itself be misleading. One understanding of the

spiritual is that which is immaterial, in contrast to bodily or material.
When life is divided up into compartments, physical, social and emotional
needs are seen as existing alongside another area called spiritual. This
spiritual life is usually equated with church-going, prayers, and religious
devotions. In other words, it becomes a separate set of activities, a
separate area of life…. [However], the spiritual is really the ultimate
ground of all our questions, hopes, fears and loves.”16

Spirituality definitely falls into the realm of heart and soul rather than head. “For

many people the very term spirituality seems amorphous and unthinkable, hard to

imagine. In some respects, we do not ‘think’ our way into spirituality.” 17 According to

the women interviewed, spirituality is a much harder term to define and often includes

their interior selves rather than some action or affiliation. “Spirituality is your whole life,

15
Kimble, McFadden, Ellor, and Seeber [editors], Aging, Spirituality and Religion: A Handbook, p. 47.
16
Fischer, Kathleen, Winter Grace: Spirituality and Aging, p. 13.
17
Carlson, Dosia, Engaging in Ministry with Older Adults, p. 51.
and really is about letting or trying to let God talk to you and lead you,” said Joyce.

“Spirituality means finding meaning, a core understanding of relationship to God, and

making a journey into understanding that relationship with God,” said Maria. “I want to

help my growth as a spiritual being in order to be as whole as possible, even though that’s

really tough.”

In addition, it is the spiritual, as much as the religious, that helped these women to

deal with the hard times in their lives and to make sense or at least accept seemingly

insurmountable tragedies. One woman interviewed, for example, Joyce (73) spoke of a

dual tragedy in her life (a diagnosis of cancer in her son and the end of her marriage, as

the catalyst that helped her to really embrace her own spirituality. “It is tempting always

to get caught up in little things, but after [my son’s cancer surgery and the end of my

marriage] I really began my spiritual journey. These kinds of events make you realize

that God is with you and is guiding your life.”

Although the church as an institution and the clergy as support people may have

given concrete help, it was relationship with God that actually allowed them to cope with

hard times. One interviewee, Lena (78), said that her spirituality allowed her to “take

what God gives and live with it and to take the bitter with the sweet,” referring to

widowhood when her daughter was only nine years old.

Religion and Spirituality: the Connection

Some studies suggest that aging actually gives individuals a better capacity for

integration and understanding of their own beliefs, which, in turn, means that older adults

may have some unique and valuable perspectives to offer on the topics of religion and

spirituality and the links between the two. “If, as one grows older, the capacity for
crystallized intelligence—that is, abstracting meaning from information—increases, then

surely our capacity for moral and spiritual development continues throughout life, given

proper stimulation and motivation. And this is precisely the case.” 18

Perhaps the most interesting discoveries brought out through conversation with

these older women are not so much the definitions of spirituality and religion that these

women had created but the relationships that they saw between the two concepts. One

interviewee, Anna (70) said that “Religion is that which binds, and spirituality is that

which frees,” adding that the freedom of spirituality must be based upon a disciplined

character that may sometimes be achieved through religious observance.

Writers in the area of spirituality and aging second this sort of relationship,

linking religion with mind and spirituality with soul. By bringing these two into closer

relationship, human beings can come to a more complex understanding of both their

religious and their spiritual beliefs. “Religious system is enriched by spiritual journey.

Faith is being more and more understood not merely as a body of knowledge, what we do

or do not believe but also as a mystery which can give meaning to our experience and

become a resource for our daily living.”19

Others interviewees felt that religion is something that enables the larger category

of spirituality. “I feel that within the context of learning and developing spiritual

understanding, the priest or the pastor is instrumental,” said Maria. In addition, many of

the women interviewed said that the combination of religion and spirituality in their life

allowed them to experience God. “God is there every day of my life, when I am aware of

18
Becker, Arthur H., Ministry with Older Persons: A Guide for Clergy and Congregations, p. 77.
19
Taylor, Blaine, The Church’s Ministry with Older Adults, p. 54.
that when I wake up and as I move around and do the things that I am able to do,

especially at my age,” said Ada.

Additional Themes

Although not included in my questionnaire, several themes presented themselves

as leit motif’s throughout all of the conversations that I had with people. First, people are

much less concerned with what the church can do for them, than about what they can

offer to the church. “When asked what they wish, rather than what they need, many older

persons say ‘To make a contribution,’ ‘To let the remaining years count,’ and even ‘To

help my family by dying well’… To have a mission, a purpose, a contribution to make

and promises to keep, and to want to come through to the last of one’s days with integrity

are the activity of the Spirit within.”20 As a church, we need to make our job searching

for opportunities to enable the ministry OF the aged as well as ministry TO the aged.

Secondly, at least according to the individuals I spoke to, we, as a church, do not

generally ask older people what they think about religion and spirituality—even when

these individuals are heavily involved in the life of the congregation. Said Maria, “I

didn’t realize I was thinking so deeply about these issues,” while Joyce added “Thank

you for asking me about this…no one has ever asked me what I thought before!”

Perhaps, this is indicative of an even broader trend, that we as a church don’t ask lay

people often enough about what they think and feel about their spiritual and religious

lives—a goal that we should add to our agendas for older adults, children and everyone in

between!

20
The Episcopal Society for Ministry on Aging [Ed.], Affirmative Aging: A Resource for Ministry, p. 24.
 This is a huge issue, particularly if we look at the work of the church—and how

this approach, this lack of communication, might impact that work. John Patton, an

expert in pastoral care, defines the work of the church in this way: “The church exists to

facilitate the care of the earth and the human beings that inhabit it, through offering

genuine relationship and enabling persons to discover meaning in life and the world.” 21

In neglecting this sort of dialogue with its older adults, the church is neglecting a

primary task of helping people find meaning. It may also, in ignoring these individuals be

losing a potential opportunity for creating a community focused on true stewardship that

truly empowers all of its workers out of a true understanding of their gifts and talents.

“The elderly of the future will be more numerous, healthier, fill more work and volunteer

roles, seek more educational and artistic opportunities, and more will live in ‘natural’

communities.”22 As Ada said, “Now that I am older, I’ve found that I’ve lessened by

activities. I have physical limitations, but as an older person, I still know that it is

important to think about how much you know and what you can do.”

Conclusions

Discussion about the why’s of aging and spirituality are a fruitless exercise unless

we as ministers allow that process to in some way inform what we offer to older

members, how we help them to utilize their talents and how we view them as a part of

our membership. “The church’s ministry with older adults naturally includes efforts to

alleviate suffering, correct injustice, and reach out to those who have become isolated.

These efforts must not, however, become an end in themselves. Suffering, injustice, and

isolation prevent older adults from carrying out God’s purpose [that people should know

21
Patton, John, Pastoral Care in Context: An Introduction to Pastoral Care, p. 25.
22
Clements, William M. [ed.], Ministry With the Aging: Designs, Challenges, Foundations, p. 171.
God and help others to know God]. Older adult ministry is concerned ultimately with

enabling older people to grow continually in faith and discipleship.” 23

This process of talking to older women about how they view their religion and

their spiritual lives have taught me any number of things that will impact the way that I

approach my diaconal ministry into the future. For example, in the coming year, I will be

helping to plan a retreat for older adults, and the study and conversations I have had

during this project will certainly inform how I approach that task.

In many ways, it greatly informed how I articulate my diaconal ministry. I have

always felt that my specific type of diaconal ministry is relational. That is the Gospel

message that I often find myself preaching: “God is reaching out to us, and wants to be in

relationship with us…we are called to value each other in imitation of that love.” Often,

particularly as a woman (because women are thought of as more approachable and better

listeners) and one who is a single-parent (because people think that I may understand

“hard times” better than some others), people in my congregation seek me out to tell me

their stories…and listening and valuing those stories is a ministry in and of itself. People

don’t often understand that their thoughts and experiences are intrinsically valuable—and

that sharing those stories with others in the community can get a true ministry. Part of my

diaconal ministry will be creating and championing those sorts of opportunities.

This exercise also gave me some real concrete evidence that inter-generational

ministry offers good opportunities for everyone involved. I would love to have had any of

these women speak to a Sunday School class—because they provide such well-

considered and heartfelt answers about their faith. It would benefit the children to hear

23
Robb, Thomas B., Growing Up: Pastoral Nurture for the Later Years, p.123.
and see someone who has lived their faith through their lives and it would benefit the

older adults to be heard and valued. There are opportunities in story telling and sharing to

build strong bonds once offered by the traditional family structure. For example, perhaps

we could match up “latchkey” kids with shut in elderly people and create a “phone tree”

whereby the children and the older people check in on one another at a set time each

day—each would be helping the other and would gain the benefit of forging a bond with

someone in a different generation.

This project has shown me that, although programs addressing some of the

limitations brought about by aging, I need to focus more on helping older adults explore

and articulate their faith and grow and continue in their spiritual journey. Perhaps we

need to offer more discussion groups, or maybe journaling workshops that will help

people capture and explore their own stories. Another possibility is a mentoring program

that would match students up with older adults to help them explore some mutual

interest.

As a church we need to find ways of helping older adults redefine their sphere of

activity within the church, rather than trying to help them accept the decline of that

activity. We need to help lay people redefine the concept of serving in the church—older

adults who can no longer sing in the choir, do the hard physical work of the church, can

exercise a ministry of prayer and presence, of listening, of visiting, of calling and

caring…in fact, the opportunities are only as limited as the human imagination.