12 steps for dealing with difficult parents

12 steps for dealing with difficult parents

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  12 Steps forDealing with Difficult Parents 1. Always stand at eye level with the person you are confronting. Never have them standing over you, looking down. 2. Respect the disgruntled person and always expect respect in return. Settle for nothing less. 3. Remain calm. A calm cool response to an angry verbal barrage can neutralize a toxic experience. 4. Listen attentively. Be prepared to take notes after the parent leaves. 5. Don't argue or interrupt, just listen. 6. Don't accuse or judge, just state how you feel about the situation. 7. Be prepared to give specific examples to illustrate the points you make. Show parents examples of average and above average work for your grade level. White out the names on papers and use actual samples of students' work to clearly illustrate typical work for the grade level. The idea isn’t to compare students to one another; it’s to give parents a clear idea of exactly what your expectations are for students in your class. 8. Don’t be afraid to end a meeting with parents who become confrontational. Sometimes, the best thing to do is to provide an opportunity for all parties to cool down and reflect on the issues at hand by bringing the meeting to a close. Set a time and date to meet again. If you feel threatened, ask your principal, vice principal or school counselor attend the next conference. 9. Be proactive! Contact parents as soon as you see academic problems or negative behavior patterns develop. You’ll have a better chance to change these patterns if you catch them early. Here are some things to discuss with parents: • areas where their child excels • if their child is attentive during lessons • where their child stands academically • specific areas where their child experiences difficulties • specific ways they can help their child at home • how well their child gets along with classmates • how long homework should take to complete • allow parents to share their concerns and ask questions • if you are unsure what a parent asks about, request specific examples
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  10. Good recordsthat document dates, times, notes and decisions about students can be invaluable if problems arise. 11. Be sensitive! No matter how tense a situation becomes, always remember that your student is someone’s precious baby. Open your conversation with parents by acknowledging the child’s strengths before you focus on areas of concern. 12. Let upset parents know that your goal is to help every child succeed. Look for ways to find common ground. Tell parents that both of you want what’s best for their child and that you want to find ways to work together. When parents are able to look at the big picture and realize that you are on the same side, you can begin to work together to help their child succeed.