Founder Leadership Workshop

Editor's Notes

• #2: Introduce ourselves here “as founders of this non-profit we’ve been doing this workshop w/ 500ish founders in the past 15months; first time w/ investors”
• #3: “We believe these skills help founders build more successful companies”
• #4: Our leaders matter In addition to being financially successful, we think the way we run companies matters -- wiser, more compassionate leaders who are skilled in their relationships w/ themselves & others are important to the world, & SV needs to lead the way - not just in the tech we develop but in how we develop people In our founder groups this where I usually talk abut how important building a team that brought out the best in each other was for me personally. But I will tell you guys, the real reason we are doing this work is because we believe that leaders matter. We believe we have entered a period where our biggest challenge as a species will be our ability to interact with each other wisely and manage the incredible power we are about to have. And in our corner of the world, you guys are the mentors for that next generation of leaders. So if anything we do here today is useful for you in your capacity as a role model and influencer of future leaders – that will make our day worthwhile.
• #7: ***feelings & emotions music has treble and clef 1. if you only have cognition and words without feelings, you don't have the full score, the full story 2. most of the time, people are "leaky" -- however they are feeling, they are emoting non-verbally. incongruence btwn words v behavior comes at the expense of credibility. therefore want congruence (so you dont want *only* thoughts or *only* feelings -- you want to communicate both) 3. "there's no room for feelings in business" -- is inspiring pple important in business? how do you inspire people without making them feel something?  important for motivation  Suppressing leads to lack of congruence – we are leaky.
• #10: “…highest-performing managers show more warmth and fondness towards others than do the bottom 25%. They get closer to people, they’re significantly more open in sharing thoughts and feelings than their low-performing counterparts. Note that they also scored high on “thinking” and a need to have power and influence over others, but that didn’t distinguish them from the bottom quartile.
• #15: Awareness & Regulation Within the group and with other groups (in relationship to other groups)
• #17: -rest of the workshop is on feedback & influence in 2 parts
• #18: Why is feedback scary? [discussion] -can feel like an attack -other person can feel controlled -other person can get defensive, have feelings hurt  It’s “scary” but doesn’t pose any physical threat to us (most of the time!), so there must be something going on our in brains that are making us scared of giving critical feedback
• #21: Inarguably true Disclosure -> empathy
• #24: Setting the Context for Feedback Groundrules Discussion (What groundrules would help me be an effective participant in giving and receiving feedback)   Organize folks so that each person has two people they work with/know well Give them time to plan feedback with each Bring them back and do “speed dating” format feedback– two rounds so that every person has done it twice Facilitator calls out time for switching "Second conversation" about feedback
• #25: Complimentary feedback: -Single biggest missed opportunity is building stronger relationships We think positive things about our colleagues, peers, and loved ones all the time but don’t say them Why do it? -encourage the good stuff -there is a relationship “bank account”- Gottman - ideal ratio of positive to negative interactions (5:1) And you want that bank account to have something in it for when you do have critical feedback to give b/c the context of your relationship does matter for delivering tough feedback.  So let’s talk about constructive feedback