Living with clutter

Living with clutter

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  Living with Clutter Whathappened? Clutter usually builds up gradually without your realizing that it’s happening. One day you find that you can’t open a door or move easily through a hallway or find what you’re looking for because there’s too much stuff. It got that way because you weren’t paying attention. Now that you’ve noticed, you can do something about it, but first you have to believe that you can live differently and that your time and effort are worth spending on creating the change. Everyone has things come into their homes: paper, clothing, furniture, household goods, books, etc. Once things are in your house, either they become valued or they create clutter. If you value something, you take good care of it by using it and storing it properly. Not everyone values the same things. Some people put a monetary value on items; others may highly value things that have sentimental meaning to them. You may also find that the things you value change over time. Exercise 1 – What you value List three things in your home that you value highly, along with the reason why each is valuable to you. It might be due to the person who gave it to you or where you acquired it or because you paid a lot of money for it. Be specific about the reason. Item #1 ____________________________________________ Reason _____________________________________________ Item #2 ____________________________________________ Reason _____________________________________________ Item #3 ____________________________________________ Reason _____________________________________________
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  Were you ableto complete the exercise quickly or did you agonize over it? Are you surprised by your choices? People typically assign value to things for one of two reasons: cost or sentimentality. Where are the things that you listed in Exercise 1? If you can’t find them or you can’t get to them because they’re buried beneath other things, you are not valuing them. Things you truly value should be treated with respect. Organizing expert Peter Walsh emphasizes the need to “honor” the things you value. That means taking them out and washing, dusting or polishing them and putting them where they can be used and enjoyed. Moldering boxes of unknown items are not being honored. If one of the items on your list is a piece of furniture, for example, put it in a room where you can see it regularly and use it properly. If it is a book, put it in a bookcase or on a shelf where you can reach it and refer to it whenever you like. Display delicate objects in a safe place if you are afraid they will get ruined. Wrap seasonal items protectively and store them to avoid damage until you display them again. From the moment of birth we are immersed in action, and can only fitfully guide it by taking thought. - Alfred North Whitehead The amount of time you spend focusing on the three things in Exercise 1 will depend upon the size of each piece and how difficult it is to reach. You may be able to finish in an afternoon or it might take several weeks. Stick with it, as long as it takes, it will be worth the effort. After you identify the items on your list and show them the respect they deserve, consider how good it feels to enjoy the things you
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  treasure. There ismore work to do and the positive feelings might drift away when you have to dig back in to the clutter. Revisit your success when you feel discouraged. You may be faced with the things you took out of a piece of furniture or the things you had to move to get to an object on your list. Don’t just dump them in a convenient place; you’ll simply have to deal with them some other time. In the next section, we will create a plan for tackling the clutter. Until then, put everything in a box or an isolated section of the room so you will be ready to continue. Being organized is just being thoughtful. Put some thought into what you're going to do, where you're going to put things, what you need to accomplish. Thinking about your tasks instead of moving on autopilot changes your perspective. It took time for your clutter to accumulate; it will take time to move through it. Don’t rush through the process. When you keep the end result in mind, you will be more motivated to continue. Exercise 2 – Keep the end in mind What are the results you want? Describe how your home, office, time, finances or relationships would look when you let go of the clutter that is holding you back. ___________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________
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  People tell mestories about their clutter and how it affects them. Here are some of the reasons they have given for wanting to let go of it:  I want to simplify my life and keep what has meaning and importance to me.  I want to experience peace of mind.  I want to save time instead of spending it looking for things.  I want to experience a sense of calm and have less stress.  I want to have pride in my home and feel joy in having guests over.  I want to have less family tension.  I want greater efficiency in my office.  I want to eliminate late fees for bills.  I want to have more time for the things that are important to me and spend less time doing things I don't care about.  I want to be able to relax without being swamped by lists of things I need to do at work and at home. You may have some of the same concerns. What do I do now? Now it’s time to make some decisions about your stuff and your space. Throw away things that are broken or unusable so they don’t take up room you could use for something else. If you’ve been holding onto an object because you want to fix it, set a specific time frame for the repair. Write it in your calendar as an appointment. If you haven’t fixed it yourself or taken it to be repaired by the deadline, it’s time to let it go. If you are holding onto things because you think they will be useful to someone you know, give them to that person. If you find out that he or she isn’t interested in the items, don’t be offended. Most
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  people already haveplenty of their own stuff and might be trying to break the habit of bringing in more. Many people hold onto things because they want to have a yard sale. I think yard sales are a lot of work for little return; however, if you want to have one, choose a place to set aside everything you want to sell and commit to a date. Once you mark the date on your calendar, you are more likely to follow through. If you change your mind, you can donate everything you have gathered. You may have clutter that doesn’t belong to you. In that case, let the owner know that you are making room in your home and that the things need to be picked up by a specific date. If they are not retrieved, you reserve the right to get rid of them. Don’t allow yourself to become a storage facility for other people’s things. Clutter affects your mood. Take a look around your home or office and think about how it makes you feel. If you feel good about it, great! When you feel surrounded by disorder, though, it affects you negatively. Clutter causes stress and removing clutter helps relieve stress. If you are starting to feel anxious about the possibility of getting rid of your clutter, keep reading. No one is going to force you to get rid of anything. Organizing is not about throwing everything out, but about finding appropriate places for the things you value. What you keep will be determined by the amount of space you have and the amount of time you want to spend maintaining your belongings. Start with one manageable area and create a vision for it. Think about how you want to use the space, how it will look and how you will feel being in there. Be realistic; nobody can live in a magazine- perfect house, but your home can still feel “lived in” without being cluttered. If you like to be surrounded by reminders of good times, you should keep those things in view. Don’t, however, confuse those reminders with stacks of mail, books and magazines that you haven’t paid attention to, along with other things you haven’t made
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  decisions about. Clutteris stuff that gets in your way; things that you like to be surrounded with add value to your life. The reason to let go of clutter is to remove obstacles Are you holding onto things that have no meaning or value to you anymore? If so, someone else could benefit from them. Would you feel better letting go of something if you knew that it could be valuable to someone else? People often get stuck, worrying about where their possessions are going to end up. I respectfully suggest that no matter who gets them, you will be better off not having them hanging around your house, keeping you from achieving your goals. Everything you discard will end up with just the right person, even if it isn’t someone you know. You can donate to charity just about anything you have that is unwanted but still functional. This serves multiple purposes: you have less clutter, you could take a tax deduction and someone else ends up with something he or she needs. There are charities that sell donations to raise money for their programs and charities that give donated goods directly to end users. Where you donate your things will depend upon what you have to give and whether you feel strongly about a particular cause. I will caution you that it is important not to let the donation process keep you from moving forward. Some people get so caught up in finding the “perfect” recipient for each thing that they’re unable to donate anything at all. Concentrate on how much better you will feel when you aren’t weighed down by things you don’t need, regardless of who ends up with them. Once you let go of the clutter, chances are very good that you won’t miss it. In addition,
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  you will realizehow much room it took up in your physical and mental space. Some things may not be worth donating; if it’s not good enough to give to a friend, it’s probably not good enough to give to charity, either. In that case, the best thing to do is throw it away. In order to be successful at keeping your space clear, you have to change the way you think. Just like any other positive habit you want to develop, it will take time and effort. Don’t expect to make huge changes suddenly; the best changes are those you introduce over time and maintain as routines. Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going. - Jim Ryun If you have ever tried to lose weight, you know that you can’t expect to lose 20 pounds overnight. View losing clutter the same way. You could go on a clutter “crash diet” and dump everything you have, but you wouldn’t learn the behaviors that will help you maintain your new lifestyle. Chances are, like going on a crash diet to lose weight, you would return to your old habits and start letting clutter back into your life. The first step to changing your habits is changing the way you think about yourself. Instead of calling yourself lazy, careless or sloppy, substitute one of these messages: I care about my property. I take the time to put things away. I spend money wisely. I understand that my belongings don’t define me.
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  Exercise 3 –Express yourself Create your own message that defines the way you want to feel about your relationship with your things: ________________________________________________ ________________________________________________ ________________________________________________ Substitute the message you wrote, above, anytime you begin to think negatively about yourself and your clutter. By changing the way you think, you can change your beliefs, which leads to creating habits. You will learn more about changing your habits in upcoming chapters. Recently I have been questioning the whole concept of “organizing” and what it means to “be organized.” When people find out what I do, they often tell me that they aren’t organized and never will be. So what? It’s nothing to be ashamed of. If someone hasn’t taught you the skills, you can’t be faulted for not knowing how to do something. I believe that everyone can learn to improve their environment and their productivity by letting go of clutter. If you can’t let go, you can learn how to manage your clutter so that you can get the most out of your spaces and your time. The thought of having to tackle many years’ worth of accumulation can keep you from even starting the process. Putting aside the fear of confronting all that stuff may be hard, but you can do it. I created the ESP system, have used it for years and find that it works well for clients who are ready to let go of clutter. The way to be successful is to start small. Empty the area – take everything out Sort the contents into three categories – keep, toss or donate Place – put things that you value in a logical location
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  Whether this isyour 1st or your 50th attempt at letting go of clutter, this time you are going to experience success by starting with a small project. People get frustrated when they take on too much and can’t finish right away. You will not realistically be able to declutter a garage or a basement in two hours, for example. Be reasonable about what you expect to accomplish. Define your area as a drawer, a shelf, a corner of a room or a section of a closet. It might feel like you will never finish your project if you have to work on such small spaces, but you will. Remember, if you do a little at a time, you will gradually notice the change. If you don’t do anything, nothing will change. Start with whatever is easiest to get to. Removing larger pieces first will make your piles decrease more quickly and you’ll be motivated by the progress you’ve made. Empty the area (drawer, shelf or corner) of everything. Put all the stuff on a flat surface, so you can see it and make decisions about it. Wipe down the area so that when you put things back, it will be clean and clear. This is not the time to deep-clean the entire room; concentrate on the limited area you chose and don’t spend all your time on cleaning in order to avoid decision making. Sorting the things you have and making decisions about it all is challenging for most people. Although it might be difficult for you, try to put aside the sentiment and don’t think about how much you paid for things. If you are having trouble deciding whether to keep something, don’t talk yourself into it. Most of my clients find Sorting to be painful, which is why they don’t get started. Rather than thinking of it as an endless, exhausting task, consider what your space will look like when you have less to put away, store, move, dust, vacuum, sweep, clean, polish and insure. Instead of spending your time cleaning and maintaining your stuff (or paying someone else to do it), you will have time and money to spend on the people and activities that you enjoy.
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  At this point,you only have to make one choice about each thing: keep it, donate it, throw it out or recycle it. You have permission to let go of things that don’t fit in your life I have found that a lot of people feel they need permission to let go of things, especially when those things were given as gifts or belonged to a loved one. Letting go of those things can cause feelings of guilt or betrayal. Ask yourself if the person who gave it to you would really want you to keep something that you no longer need, want or enjoy. I believe that if the person truly cared about you, he or she would want you to let go of what you can’t use and allow someone else to benefit from it. You will learn more about letting go of sentimental attachments later in the book. Paul Graham, a computer programmer and writer, has a very healthy perspective about “stuff.” In an essay, he noted, “The only way you're ever going to extract any value from [your stuff] is to use it. And if you don't have any immediate use for it, you probably never will.” Coming from someone who is not an organizer, the message is very powerful. People are reluctant to part with things that they (or someone else) spent a lot of money on. Keeping something because it cost a lot of money doesn’t bring the money back. Just because something cost a lot of money doesn’t make it valuable. Neither does age. People hold onto things thinking that they will sell them at some undetermined time in the future and make a lot of money. If you have a collection of items you are hoping to sell for a profit, keep in mind that most “limited-edition collectibles” do not increase in value. They are mass-produced and appeal to a limited audience.
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  Would you stillkeep it if it hadn’t cost anything? Is it really the item you are keeping or the feelings about how the money was spent? Whether it was a bargain or a budget buster is not important. If you don’t love it and don’t use it, it doesn’t matter how much it cost; it’s just taking up space. You may think that because you already own something, it isn’t costing you anything. But it is. It’s costing you time to clean it or maintain it. It’s costing you peace of mind. It’s costing you space that could be used for something else. And if you’re paying for storage because you’ve run out of room, it is costing you rent every month. You might be hesitant to let go of something because you paid a lot for it and you haven’t used it yet. Whether it doesn’t fit, doesn’t go with anything or doesn’t appeal to you anymore, don’t hang on to it. If you have no use for something, you aren’t helping yourself by keeping it around in case you change your mind. Take money out of the equation If you no longer have a need for an item, let it go. If it can be used by someone else, give it away. If it is too worn to be useful to anyone else, throw it away. If you want to invest the time and energy, you can try to sell it. When you sell something, don’t expect to get back the amount of money that the item cost when it was new. A woman in one of my workshops spoke about selling everything from her late in-laws’ home, including a very expensive adjustable bed that sold for only $25 at the estate sale. To the buyer, it was just used furniture. People often tell me that they aren’t using something, but they can’t let it go because they are saving it. They may be saving something for future children or grandchildren, for when they lose a few
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  pounds, for whenthey find time to pursue a hobby, or because it’s just too nice to use. Instead of saving things for some magical time when you might be ready to use them, seriously consider whether holding onto them improves your life. I have seen scores of homes with brand-new items tucked away because the owner was saving them. Don’t save things for later; use them now, enjoy them now. Enjoy it now or let it go When you’re Sorting, look at the number of things you have. How many pairs of black pants do you really need? Unless you have a job where you wear the same thing every day, it doesn’t make sense to “stock up” on black pants or white shirts or navy shoes or any other clothing. By owning less, you can buy something new when the style or your taste changes. If you have multiple casserole dishes or serving trays or coffee cups because you used to entertain a lot, consider how many are reasonable for you to keep and let go of the rest. Look at how you live now and keep only what fits in your life. Clutter often is the result of delayed decisions. When you put off decision making, you actually are making a choice by choosing to do nothing about it. You are allowing the details of your life to overwhelm you when you don’t act on them. As you Sort, you will determine what you want to keep before you put anything away. Take into account the amount of space you have, as well as your lifestyle and routines. Also consider the amount of time you want to devote to maintaining your things. To help you decide what stays, ask yourself the following questions and be realistic when you answer:
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   Have you used it recently?  Do you have something like it?  Will you remember you have it?  Will you be able to find it?  Does it get in the way of finding something else you need to use?  Can it be replaced easily?  Can you borrow one from someone else?  What’s the worst that can happen if you let it go? Now it’s time to find a Place for everything you want to keep. The most sensible solution is to put things where you use them. If you have a dog, keep the leash near the door. If you collect coupons, keep them in your car. If you do crafts in the dining room, choose a spot where you can leave materials and projects when you’re not working on them. Everything you own needs a home There is no “right place” to keep things. What’s “right” is what works for you, because you need to find things and put them back when you’re finished with them. Think about how and where you use things. For example, you might keep one pair of scissors in the bathroom, one in the kitchen and one in your desk. Someone else might keep one in the bedroom, one in the family room and one in the garage. Make sure you are able to return things to their homes or you will end up buying more to replace the ones that you can’t find because they are scattered around. I have clients who have collections of bags of miscellaneous stuff because they were having company over and they cleared the entertaining areas. They throw everything into bags, then toss them into a closet or spare room. Afterward, no one remembers to go back and get the bags. Meanwhile, invitations are lost, bills go
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  unpaid and duplicatesare purchased because they’ve disappeared into a corner of a closet. Don’t put it down, put it away Putting things in containers isn’t a better solution, unless you use them intentionally. You can buy baskets and boxes and bins that allow you to hide stuff and give you the illusion that you’ve cleared away clutter, when all you’ve done is stashed it out of sight. If you shove into containers anything that’s lying around, you won’t be able to find things when you need them. Instead, group like items and put the containers where you can find them. Although it may be tempting, don’t buy containers before you see what you have to put inside them. I recommend buying multiples of the same size container so you can stack them easily once they’re filled. If you are grouping toiletries and healthcare items, for example, they usually fit nicely into shoebox-size containers that can be stored in the linen closet or under a bathroom sink. In a garage or basement, you probably will need large totes to store tools, sporting goods or other seasonal items. Gather together all the things that belong in your selected space, and put them back. You can use dividers to split up the space or containers to hold small items. Don’t stack things so high that they will topple over or risk tumbling down if you take out the lowest one. Be aware of how far you can reach; put your most-used items in the area between your shoulders and your waist, so you can access them easily. If you can’t find a place for something after you have put everything else away, consider whether you need it. What about the rest of it? You find personal grooming implements in the dining room and bills in the bedroom. Clients often tell me that they put things down to take care of “later” instead of putting them away right
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  away. When youdon’t make time to address these issues, “later” never comes and clutter builds up as a result of unmade decisions. When you are unable to put things away immediately, use the “get close” premise. It may not always be convenient to stop what you’re doing and take care of something at that moment, so put it close to where it needs to go. For example, if you are upstairs and you don’t want to interrupt what you’re doing to return something to a downstairs room, place it at the top of the stairs and take it with you the next time you go down. If you want to put something in the car, set it near the door to go out. Don’t be a dumper What you don’t want to do, however, is start making piles that linger for weeks. You need to move the things to their intended homes when you finish what you were doing. When you take a moment to put things away now, you avoid hours of cleaning up later. As productivity expert David Allen says, “If you can do it in two minutes or less, do it now.” Grouping tasks will allow you to use your time wisely. Otherwise, you might be likely to flit from room to room, not completing anything. This is especially important if you are easily distracted; you find yourself dashing from project to project because you get sidetracked when you leave the room to put something away. You will be more productive if you stay where you are and finish what you are doing; then put everything away when you complete the task. Put a little extra thought into your actions, instead of letting things fall where you drop them. We cannot become what we need to be by remaining what we are. – Max Du Pree
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  If you don’thave enough space to keep everything you want, you might be considering or already be paying for outside storage. If you are selling your home and need it to show better, putting your things in storage is a good idea. Likewise, if you are between homes and need a place to keep your things, self-storage units are great. However, more and more people are using storage units as a way to avoid making decisions about their excess belongings. There also are lots of people who save things because they think they will be “worth something someday.” Is the cost to rent a storage unit worth the gamble that the items will increase in value? If you have things in storage, consider how much that storage costs you each month and what the stored objects are worth. Could you replace them with the money you spent holding onto them? Take inventory of what you are storing and decide whether you’re spending your money wisely.