Here are some things I noticed about the paragraph:
- It makes a clear comparison between Rihanna and Taylor Swift's images and the audiences they aim their music towards. This is the main point of the paragraph.
- It uses some relevant terminology like "stereotypical image", "rebellion", "role model", "clean cut image", "fan base", "demographic" to analyze and describe the two artists.
- The comparison could be strengthened by providing some examples or evidence from the music videos to back up the claims.
- There are a few minor grammatical errors like missing articles.
Overall it gets the main point across in a concise way and uses some appropriate terminology. With a