This document discusses why databases can be difficult. It begins by noting that databases are selfish, want entire systems to themselves, are messy and suck up resources. It then compares databases to toddlers. It identifies problems like most PHP developers lacking SQL training. It provides quizzes and discusses concepts like joins, indexes, foreign keys, transactions and query plans. It offers programming advice like checking return codes and scrubbing data. Finally, it recommends books and invites questions.