The place for random thoughts or ideas that aren’t big enough for a full sized article.
Update as of July 2021: Rather than posting things here I’ve been choosing instead to do postings on Gab since joining in January of ’21. So if you’re interested in more of these random bits concerning abductions/MILABs, the “woo” and societal commentary >> then check out my Gab feed. << I also touch on important/revelatory shows and movies, as well as books relating to truth seeking/metaphysics/spirituality/paranormal/abductions and MILABs, etc. along with personal photography/vids, some favorite music and humor. So I try to post a wide variety of interesting and original content, versus many Gabs that only post memes and obsessively focus on politics. And I respond to comments. So check it out if you’re interested. (The comments is where most of the action is, especially since some of the posts I do are multi-parters, which continue into the comments. You can’t view the comments though, or the multi-parters in full without being registered with a [free] Gab account.) So check it out if you’re interested, and be sure to sign up to view and participate in the comment discussions. Unlike other Gabs my comments isn’t full of hundreds of fighting trolls all screaming at each other and saying angry things. You’d have to have a ton of followers for that nonsense and luckily I don’t. :D My Gab is just the cool spot in the corner talking about interesting things with a small group of like-minded people who sometimes join in.
In the meantime if I ever write another full length article then I will definitely post it here, so I haven’t completely abandoned this site. For now though I’m just finding the whole “Gab as Blog-ish outlet” to be easier and more suitable for putting shorter things out on a regular basis, and which cover a wider array of subjects and also allows for immediate live-time discussion with readers.
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Note: For whatever reason I never thought to put dates on these entries, though I should have. But, they’re in order from most recent (2020 is the first/latest) to oldest on page 2, which goes as far back as 2006, when this website first launched. So the voice of the older entries is a bit different from who I am now, in 2020. Part of me wrestles with whether to keep sections like this up on my site, only because they are so old. The me now sounds different, and would write things differently. But I’ll just think of it as a time capsule I guess. Many of the ideas are still just as relevant today as they were then. It is weird though to be reading old entries about “the election” and realizing….I was talking about the 2008 election. It feels like a lifetime ago.
Prophetic Dreams Relating to 2020 Election?
Okay, been awhile since I updated the “Thoughts” area. Like….five years. Normally I don’t post my dreams on my website, because I’m not in the business of “prophesies” and predictions and all that, which others so eagerly engage in. But in light of last night’s dream I feel something should be put out there, I don’t know. Why not. It’s interesting, and possibly lines up to what others are sensing and seeing as well.
First there was the dream from two nights ago, where the lyrics to Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” were the star of the show. But it was specific portions of the song. The first part that was emphasized to me was:
“There ain’t no second chance against the thing with 40 eyes, girl.”
That one line was emphasized to me over, and over, and over. In the song’s context “the thing with 40 eyes” is supposed to be a general reference to monsters/ghouls. But as Tom was quick to note….. 40 = 4D (4th density) So, something operating from 4D, watching? Otherwise “40 eyes” could also just mean…..a whole lotta eyes, watching. Looking at the entire line, concerning second chances – the Dems were obviously hoping for a second chance at the White House, being that they failed the first time with Hillary. But…..“there ain’t no second chance against the thing with 40 eyes.” Despite whatever the mainstream liberal media may be saying, lying, denying and all around gaslighting the public with their premature calling of the election, the fact is – there are many, many eyes on this thing. Their shenanigans with election fraud are very much seen.
The next part of the song that was emphasized was the starting and ending of Vincent Price’s monologue:
“Darkness falls across the land
The midnight hour is close at hand
Creatures crawl in search of blood
To terrorize your neighborhood.”
[…] And though you fight to stay alive
Your body starts to shiver
For no mere mortal can resist
The evil of The Thriller.”
O.o
Just those two stanzas, nothing else in between. So, there was that. Not having listened to, nor even thought about the song “Thriller” in ages means this wasn’t just random things I’d focused my attention on or even caught peripherally over the past few days that my brain was processing during the dream state. This was “something else,” one of those symbolic message dreams.
Then there was last night’s dream.
Lot of random things were happening in this dream, but the gist was that it took place in Chicago, for starters. Emphasis on the tall skyscrapers, and the knowledge of “Sears Tower” to make sure I understood that this wasn’t just any city skyline I was looking up at, but specifically, Chicago. (Note: A place I’ve only been once, 25 years ago, and otherwise have no connection to, nor have thought about recently.) So again, not random things I’ve put my focus on over the past few days that my brain is processing.
There were “tsunamis” coming, so the scene switched to me and Tom, inside one of the skyscrapers, running up the stairs to try to make it to the top floors ASAP. No panic or fear though. Just all matter-of-fact, like being on a fun adventure. But I saw the gigundo wave coming when we were outside – Like 1,000+ feet high. [ NOTE: I don’t believe the tsunami relates to anything literal. Too many people who’ve had dreams about these times, seeing volcanos, earthquakes, tsunamis, and other assorted cataclysms aren’t considering the symbolic meaning of these things. And while I immediately interpreted the symbolism in a symbolic way, indicating “destruction/washing something away” Tom also mentioned the tsunami could represent what the Dems were aiming for – a “Blue Wave.” They were hoping for a blue/Dem wave to sweep the Senate, Congress, and of course ultimately, the White House itself. To which I also agree. That’s a great interpretation as well.]
Meanwhile, back to the dream, where Tom did his usual polite and gentlemanly thing in the dream where he paused to attempt to let me go first (which I normally decline, because he’s got longer legs and is much faster, so I always just let him go first when we go up stairs in everyday situations) and in this case I did the same, pausing, and gesturing for him to Go ahead of me, Go on, because “…..you’re more important…..” Again, all very matter-of-fact. Zero fear, panic, anxiety, nothing. Even in the real world, not just in dreams, the last thing I would ever do is scramble and clamber over anybody in some effort to “save myself!”
Then the dream changed scenes, so we were now at the top, skipping ahead past the 70-90 floors in between, and I immediately ran over to the windows to see the wave. By that point the water level was just a few floors underneath us. O.o So it had already happened, inundating everything, but we were safe, at the top, and above it.
There was a lot of other random things in the dream at this point, but the thing worth skipping ahead to was when I found myself back outside again, on the ground. No more water/waves at the moment. (that’s how you know you’re in a dream ;D ) I saw a guy in a car in front of the skyscraper building, about to take off into the city streets. It was Gary Oldman, dressed up in the role of Sid Vicious, from his movie “Sid and Nancy.” “Gary/Sid” had a gun with him from what I vaguely could tell, and I saw that he had “necklaces” around his neck. I leaned in towards the driver’s side window to get a better look, squinting and focusing in the dream to see/read. The necklaces were gold, wrapped closely around his neck, and the top portion read “MK ULTRA.” The second layer underneath said “MIND CONTROL” and next to that, “86.”
As most know, Sid Vicious was the lead singer of the punk group The Sex Pistols. So we have a shit ton of symbolism going on here. Punk = rebellious, anarchy. Then we have vicious. Pistols/guns. And then we don’t have the actual Sid Vicious, we have the actor who played the role of him. And spelled out clear as day, MK Ultra, Mind Control, and 86. The wrapped around the neck thing also relates to MK slaves, imo. The whole “choker collar” thing I talk about in my book that MK slaves either do wear or are given programming to wear. “Sid and Nancy” came out in 1986 coincidentally, but the necklace didn’t say 1986. Just 86. 86 also means to nix/eliminate. So, a “vicious” mind controlled pawn playing the role he was programmed/MK’d to play, heading out to tear shit up with his gun, instigate rebellious anarchy, with the mission to 86. 86 what though? Take down society? Assassinate? :/ If it’s the latter than the name “vicious” would be aptly fitting. :/
Then factoring in the “Thriller” dream focusing on specific lyrics (“Creatures crawl in search of blood, to terrorize your neighborhood….”) and yeah, it seems we could be in for some weird times up ahead following this election. But, we all knew that anyway, this isn’t some big revelation. It’s just unusual for me to have such a pointed, detailed dream about it all. Very much NOT the norm.
I’ll leave off with another symbolic dream I had back on 7/22/20 directly relating to the current political situation. Again, completely not the norm for me at all, so it was so intriguing to have a dream like this for that reason. My entire life I’ve kept myself on the sidelines, not getting involved in most anything going on here, because of higher knowing of having been in better realities in other times/dimensions, for starters, so this place is a sad joke in comparison and therefore not worth my time. But also because of having repeatedly “seen behind the curtain” we’re not supposed to know is there. You know…kind of ruins the illusion. :/ Years of conspiracy/truth seeker research, plus all the MILABs and alien shit, and memories of being in facilities during abductions and such. Including one that was so deep underground that I realized the entire place was in effect its own reality/world, completely removed from anything happening on the surface. May as well have been a different planet. (something I had absolutely NO concept of at the time I had that “dream”/memory flash/whatever it was. Didn’t know about underground bases yet, had no idea something could be built so far deep into the earth, including anti-gravity mechanics and “electromagnetic forcefields.” Just so incredibly eye opening, and took months for me to shake off because I’d never experienced anything like it.) But which again also contributed to “seeing behind the curtain,” and ruining the illusion of the front stage “surface world.”
But needless to say, back in July I had a very specific, pointed dream concerning what turned out to be Trump. I was at this fancy pants mansion/museum type of place open to the public. It was of the utmost high level classy you could imagine, furnished and decorated with the nicest materials and things possible from around the world. So I was walking around, taking in all the fanciness, and a voice off to the side narrating/describing the place emphasized something about “The use of space.” Meaning, not only was it decorated with the nicest things possible, but it was highly organized/meticulously thought and planned out to the highest level, maximizing every bit of space in the most efficient way possible. Which was considered unusual, and an achievement, since apparently something to that level had never been done before, as I understood it. Then it was revealed that this is a Trump property. The look of the place was dark, but not sinister. Lot a lot of fancy dark wood and low lighting, no windows. There were many people milling about since it also functioned as a museum.
A female voice off to the side let me know that they were burning it all to the ground to get rid of it. I was then asked if I knew whether they could get it completely burned down to the ground in only 30 minutes.
“You’re asking me??” I replied sarcastically, puzzled. “Do I look like a firefighter or a professional arsonist???” (yes, I literally said that. :D ) I had no idea if that was possible. Seemed unlikely though. But clearly they wanted this shit GONE, and ASAP.
I was immediately struck by the total waste of it all, and questioned why they would burn the place down with all the furnishings and decorations and expensive artwork still inside. At least remove all of that first to save/re-use it. But no, they didn’t care. Just burn it, burn all of it, and NOW. ASAFP. Total insanity, I thought, such a waste, it just boggled the mind.
On a side note, something I was completely unaware of until today (11/20/20), as I go back in to edit this, was that the Washington Post’s Jennifer Rubin went on national TV in August of 2019 saying “It’s not only that Trump has to lose, but all his enablers have to lose. We have to collectively in essence burn down the Republican party. We have to level them. Because if there are survivors, if there are people who weather this storm they will do it again.” Again, I had no idea at the time I had my dream almost a year after the fact, because I don’t watch TV news or any political commentary shows. So…yeah. There you go. “Burn it down, ASAFP!” indeed. :/ :/ (btw, we purposely don’t own a TV anyway; everything we do is via the ‘net/online, which would require actively seeking sources out, versus just flipping on a TV and mindlessly vegging out to “whatever’s on.” Which for many people is…..the news, and political commentary shows. And which nowadays are all heavily liberal-biased, often spewing outright lies. The entire mainstream media has been corrupted. So people just crash out in front of the TV, slipping into their passive, light trance states, mindlessly absorbing up the heavily liberal-biased “news” and lies. And then are too lazy to do their own fact checking research for what they’re hearing, or, they’re so low intelligence that it doesn’t even occur to them to question.)
I came across the Jennifer Rubin clip only because it was featured in one of Paul Joseph Watson’s latest vids as part of a compilation of news clips showing the far left’s ongoing violent, loony toons rhetoric. I always joke that I can never make it through any of PJW’s vids because the clips he shows (about current events and cultural subjects) always get me so riled up and stressed out. And mind boggled. I get about two or three minutes in, tops, and always wind up turning them off because I can’t believe what I’m hearing. (no slam against him personally. It’s the content of the clips, always featuring the stupidest and craziest that humanity has to offer.) I keep trying though. :D Like today. Which is how I found the Jennifer Rubin clip. I truly don’t know how people are watching the mainstream news anymore if this is what it’s become and this is what they’re being brainwashed with. (Speaking of leftist propaganda, there was a headline I saw recently online showing Stephen Colbert doing what he does best – being a tool – full on crying on his show about Trump. When I saw that it reminded me of a vid Tom showed me, of Colbert doing a whole skit with Hillary Clinton about eating baby sandwiches at the deli, and another about sacrificing babies, using a real live, very much awake baby as a prop as he ran around the stage screaming ‘Don’t eat me, eat the baby!!!!!!’ complete with demonic growling sound effects. And people fell for his tears? Thinking he’s just a genuinely concerned, sensitive man? wow. Or how about The Nation columnist Katha Pollitt saying ‘She’d vote for Biden if he boiled babies and ate them.’ That’s how deranged it’s all gotten, but, I REALLY digress. It’s all gotten so insane that it reveals itself for the farce that it is though. The classic phenomenon of “trying so hard that they overshoot it, and thus give themselves away” thing that I’ve discussed in various places around my site with regards to Negs’ mode of operation. So things are not what they seem to be, trust me on that one. A lot of shit has gone on behind the scenes these past four year with Trump in office, in terms of exposing the endless corruption facilitated by Hillary and Obama, but also taking down sex trafficking and pedo rings one by one. Of which the liberal media won’t report on, so, you have to find sources that are. The liberal “elite” are terrified because they don’t have an ally in office anymore to cover their asses in terms of their pedo/child sacrificing and sex trafficking nonsense, CCP affiliations, and all around corruption in general. That’s what’s really going on here. Grown ass men don’t cry because “orange man is president!” They cry when they know the gig is up for them. And his “skits” revealed everything about what he – and Hillary – and their ilk – are truly about. It’s now become the new norm to joke about pedophilia and baby eating/sacrificing. There’s a reason for that. They want to be out in the open, to announce who they are and what their intents are, and they want the public to “give permission”/be complicit.)
But back to the dream………Inside I opened one of the many built-in wood cabinets that lined the walls and looked through the stuff inside. All nice stuff, like fancy artistic tiles that you could use as decorations or part of a mosaic. Then this large fancy art book. I started leafing through the oversized pages, seeing all the super fancy designs, all gilded in gold leaf. One was an elephant, with lots of gold, and again I lamented the insanity and waste of burning this down. [NOTE: I didn’t even make the connection, but Tom pointed out that the Republicans/GOP is represented by the elephant. duh! I’m endlessly fascinated when dreams provide symbolisms that our waking consciousness doesn’t even realize/understand.] So “they” were hellbent on destroying all of this niceness.
At one point I was either shown the lit match that was thrown into a room, or I was handed it to throw myself, can’t really remember. But the lit match was tossed, and the process was initiated. The attempt to burn it all to the ground had begun, and the place was officially on fire.
I saw the little clumps of flames all around the room, like when you start a charcoal grill. It doesn’t immediately become a raging inferno, it’s just starting out.
It was so slow and non-threatening that nobody was even rushing to get out. It was like business as usual. […] The invisible female voice off to the side told me I needed to be telling people to get out of here, evacuate. A line of people were walking towards me to my left, so I commanded them that they needed to leave. “COME ON PEOPLE, LET’S GO!!!!” (Just to note though – I’m not a lefty/liberal/Democrat by any means. I may keep myself on the outside, not bothering, but that much is certain. !!!) But that’s symbolic – commanding people “on the left” that “they need to go.” Get out!
I continued meandering about and came across a small movie theater in the mansion. I looked through the doorway and saw it was filled with people, sitting in their seats, backs to me, staring at the screen before them. They had no idea what was going on in terms of the fire, just focusing calmly on the screen, oblivious.
[…] (Strange scene involving finding a bunch of candy/candy bars in those aforementioned built-in cabinets and shoving some into a Michael Kors purse. Which for those who may not know, all have a giant “MK” logo on the outside. My subconscious is fully aware of that. Behind me was a display showing Ivanka Trump wearing a particular outfit. [strange and unique, but high end and tailored and pretty cool, very stylish] and I wondered how come I never see pants like that when I go shopping. :D But just to note – I’m not a personal fan of any of the Trumps. Which is again, another reason it’s strange that I would have been dreaming about them. I’m well aware of the whole “false two choice dichotomy” b.s. that we’re always dealing with in this reality, but which is especially relevant when it comes to black/white two choice elections, and which is another reason I don’t engage in politics. We’re supposed to pick between two candidates that have been chosen for us to vote for by those infamous Powers That Be, and who represent two extreme ends of the spectrum. The entire thing is rigged in that sense. There’s no true choice. And none of these candidates are truly good people. But over the last four years it’s become evident that Trump is (was?) definitely the lesser of the two evils, if the only other “choice” the public is being given is extreme far left radical socialism (even communism) burning cities down and destroying businesses. :/ Among many other issues, including selling out the U.S. to China. No thanks. So, that’s my official “political stance,” which is still a non-stance, since I don’t participate.
The bottom line was that I never actually saw the Trump mansion burn down. I only saw the lit match tossed in, with the intent to burn all that niceness to the ground ASAFP. Saw the small clumps of fire like when a charcoal grill is first lit, but hadn’t caught on yet, trying to burn down what was apparently the most efficient, meticulous and well planned out “use of space” that had ever been attempted. (“space” doesn’t only have to refer to physical space, but to a window of time as well. “We’ve only got four years, minimum, to pull this off. Plan it down to the letter before we even get started, hit the ground running on day 1, and don’t waste a single second.” Meanwhile, commanding people “on the left” that they needed to “get out,” and as people in general had no idea what was going on, just sitting there, glued to their theater screen, oblivious, watching their distraction show, as the start of the fire was right there, around them.
It’s all extremely obvious to interpret.
Epic Fail Bosses – Just that naturally inept, or strategically placed pawns?
Since pretty much everybody has to work then most people reading this are probably going to relate to my observations. But it concerns exactly what the title of this entry says – workplace bosses that are heaping buckets of fail to such an extent that it’s just over the top, and to where you’re left scratching your head wondering are they really just that stupid and inept?? Or is this like some sort of conspiracy or something?? Because nobody can be that inept at what they do and be allowed to keep being in charge of anything….…right?????
Me being me immediately gravitates towards the conspiracy, of course. ;) But I don’t think I’m wrong. And I know the issue isn’t limited to the workplace.
The inspiration for this write up came about when I was winding down my final days at a long-ish term temp gig back in July of 2014, where I had been at for four months and witnessed yet another example of a Fail Boss in action, literally running her department into the ground. That was the term I used to described things when thinking about it, and as it turned out, how my immediate supervisor Lisa also described it when talking about the situation with me. So it’s funny we both used the same phrase for the situation.
I could go on for pages about everything I became privy to after being there only four months, but obviously that’s not practical. But I can summarize the situation by saying that basically any decision that needed to be made, then it seemed you could guarantee that this woman would make the wrong one, and then not care, and then often times do nothing when the ramifications for those wrong decisions reared their ugly head. (I’ll refer to everybody else as their actual name, but keep Fail Boss anonymous, referring to her as “Danielle,” since her name is very distinctive, something I’ve never heard before.)
In fact, the entire reason I even had that gig and a steady paycheck in the first place was because of one particular wrong decision, which was to keep hiring an endless string of temps to do a job that needs to be done by a permanent person. (And to be clear, I did not want to be that permanent person. The job sucked.) Instead of investing in hiring a permanent employee, whom you only need to go through one round of training and “learning curve” with, and who will hopefully remain there for at least a few years, if not longer, and who will be invested in the job AND have the correct background for it to boot, she instead preferred to keep bringing in disposable temps who didn’t have the right background, and who always need to be trained from the ground up each and every time, which is a huge time and energy investment/drain (and impedes on other work getting done by Lisa who needs to do the training)…………..only to have those temps bail out because…..the job sucks. (which is the case with me. That’s why I’m finally bowing out. But I can guarantee that with a slightly better pay they’d have no problem getting somebody who would want to do the job permanently.) Or, the temps finish out the allotted assignment but they’re not extended, because Danielle doesn’t feel that her department is busy enough to justify keeping the temp on. Even though they’re swamped and drowning. All the time. Then after a few months of Lisa pleading to have another temp, or better yet, an actual permanent new hire, Danielle reluctantly concedes, but only to the idea of a temp, and only for a few months. Then the whole thing starts all over again. Meanwhile as Danielle sits tucked away in her cozy office with the windows and a view, far away from where the other three permanent members of her department sit in their dark cubes.
Now granted, having the steady temp gig served me nicely, but objectively it’s just one of an endless slew of examples of Danielle’s “bad choices that make no sense and which help drive the department into the ground.” As well as creating strife, chaos and discord, and tanking employee morale.
Lisa also relayed to me that she had to fight tooth and nail to get any of her time saving, revenue boosting ideas implemented, because Danielle would block them at every turn, pretty much. A good boss would want to hear about anything that’s going to improve business. In this case, it was the opposite.
And yet another great example worth mentioning involves pitting people against each other to create unnecessary fighting and drama. But Lisa was the person overseeing me and then the two perm members of the department; she was the one training all newbies to the department, doling out the workload, making executive decisions about who will do what based on their abilities, which may also include taking a particular responsibility away from one and designating it to another if the other is better at it. She was the one everybody went to when there are any questions or problems, and she was the one with the feedback “hammer of judgment” (or praise). And yet, Danielle refused to officially declare her a supervisor. Even though she was in every other way other than title, and was the one everybody actually interacts with in that capacity, she was never allowed to actually be one “officially.” And even better, when Lisa and another now former perm employee Scott were constantly clashing and squabbling due to his gross incompetence (Danielle hired him on, of course, even though he’d never had a real job before and didn’t have any of even the basic requirements for the job, including knowing MS Office, then she flat out refused to fire him no matter how bad it got…) Danielle would tell Scott things like “Lisa’s not your supervisor, don’t listen to her,” and “You don’t report to Lisa, you report to me”………..playing both sides. Talk about departmental mindfuck. “Train him and answer his questions and dole out his workload and oversee him Lisa….She’s not your supervisor Scott, you don’t report to her….” That wound up being one of the biggest contributing factors for why Scott finally quit. It was clear though that Danielle really got a kick out of the trouble that Scott’s ineptness caused Lisa for the year and a half he was there. A lot of that trouble was the way in which Lisa couldn’t trust Scott to do any aspect of his job correctly, had to constantly babysit him, and was always having to re-do all the work he did, on top of all her own job….which in itself was already three people’s jobs in one. And yet no matter how much she complained Danielle would never get rid of Scott. These types of shenanigans cost organizations money. For-profit companies are ultimately there to sell products, that’s the entire reason they exist. But bad decision shenanigans trickle down towards productivity and $$$ profits $$$.
There are lots more of these examples I could go on about in terms of that gig, and as I always say in so many of my articles, each example taken individually doesn’t necessarily indicate or prove anything. But pool them all together and step back and look at the Bigger Picture… And that’s where you really have to wonder, was she really that out of touch and incompetent? Or was something else amiss?
This wouldn’t be the first, or the second, or the third, or the fourth, etc. job, whether permanent or temporary, where I’ve come across these seemingly hapless buffoon bosses that have absolutely no business being in the position of manager, and yet mysteriously….are. The old folks home in west Boca Raton in 2013, the “Illuminati Hotel” as I jokingly called it back in Charlottesville, Virginia in 2005, the engineering firm back in SoCal in 2000, to give a smattering sample. (believe me, there’s more.) And that’s not even counting other people’s stories I’ve been told over the years by various coworkers. It’s rampant. I’m repeatedly seeing the same sorts of patterns with these types of managers who had no business being hired on as a manager, and where everybody below them paid the price for their ineptness and bad decision making. The thing that they all seemed to have in common, no matter what the industry, was the following:
1. Make extraordinarily baaaaad decisions, coming across as a moron in a lot of ways, yet paradoxically…
2. …Had a “smart” presentation in terms of how they looked, dressed, talked, carried themselves and interacted with people. The exterior looked and sounded “smart” while the interior often behaved thick as a brick. However, don’t be so quick to write them off as stupid, because…
3. …Talk to them long enough and you’ll eventually witness that dark, intelligent energy flash through their eyes and across their face that seems to clearly be “something else.”
4. In some cases, and I’ve experienced this at least once, the eyes may be completely glazed over and empty/far away as they speak in a monotone, emotionless way as they’re engaging in yet another one of their epic fail moments as a supervisor, completely unable to be reasoned with. Nobody’s home. So who the hell is piloting them and governing their bad decision in that moment??
Another part of the pattern is the result of it all – often times there are supervisors or lead people below the Big Cheese manager(s) who wind up doing two to three times the work, putting in 50-70 hours a week like a manic gerbil in a wheel because the Big Cheese is so incompetent. Which was the case with Lisa, the unofficial lower level supervisor who worked like a superhero. Instead of getting fed up and jumping off the wheel they just work harder and harder the faster the wheel spins, burning themselves out. And meanwhile the Big Cheese just keeps plugging along nonchalantly, never breaking a sweat, and never getting fired.
In that particular temp situation I saw those possible glimpses of “something else” when sitting in Danielle’s office as we discussed the situation with me giving my notice. I kept things as pleasant as could be, offering to give as much notice as they required, one week, two weeks, whatever, and help train my replacement since Danielle confirmed she’d be bringing in another temp. Also mentioned all the how-to notes I’d typed up over the past several months detailing every aspect of my job so it wouldn’t all be for nothing (something that Danielle originally requested Lisa to have me do in fact) and which would ease the training of the next person. And for Scott’s replacement too, as I pointed out, since much of his job position overlapped with mine.
There was the fake pleasant smile…interspersed with the weird frowny looks that kept popping up, as her face seemed conflicted on which way to go, and the dark flash in the eyes, along with the overall nonchalant cold indifference and/or slight disdain. As I sat there I could see why one of the interns for another department had said that Danielle “scares her.” She’s not overtly scary in terms of voice or behavior, but it’s the overall vibe, and that dark look in her face and eyes that keeps appearing, in conflict with the really fake smile. However, Danielle rejected the idea of me giving any kind of extended notice, saying that Friday (two days away) would be fine, nixed the idea of helping to train the replacement (Lisa had already lamented to me that she would have absolutely no time to train a new person, and especially since Scott was also now gone.) So even though it would greatly alleviate a burden to have me do a full two week notice and do the training, and Lisa really wanted that…..Danielle wasn’t interested.
And as far as the typed up detailed how-to notes go, which again, was her idea and her original request, and which had never been done in such a comprehensive way as I’d done them? “Maybe we’ll use them…” she said, disinterested, while looking away. !!
Maybe? um…okay. :/ If she thought she was spiting me in some way by rejecting the notes I’d put the effort into typing up for her then she was even stupider than I thought. I wonder if she ever heard of the phrase, “Cut off your nose to spite your face.” It wouldn’t effect me one bit after I left if she chose to reject the how-to notes. It would only effect her. Meanwhile later Lisa joked to me that she doesn’t care what Danielle says…….when whatever temp comes in on the following Monday she was going to hand them my notes and tell them to go away and sit down and read them, ‘cause she doesn’t have time to train them.
I found Danielle’s reactions intriguing as over and over again she proved she wasn’t interested in anything that would actually help her department run as smoothly as possible…to the point of obnoxious obviousness. It also reinforced my feeling that ultimately it was good to get out of there. The next day Lisa and I were talking about this situation, and she was just mind blown about Danielle’s statement to her behind the scenes that allowing me to give one or two week notice in order to help her out “was not an option,” as well as the ways in which she was blocking all attempts at a smooth transition.
“It’s almost like she’s trying to cause the email marketing department to fall down!!!!” she said to me.
Hmm, it kinda does, doesn’t it?
The other defining characteristic of Danielle was that she functioned in extreme “black/white thinking,” to the point where another temp that sat next to me, Karla, referred to her as “the robot.” Very telling. (and in case I may come across as upset or emotionally invested in the situation in any way to certain readers that’s definitely not the case. I’ve been viewing all of this with detached interest, just taking mental notes.)
So what’s going on with these types then? My assessment is that whoever and whatever they are, they’re a match for negative, self serving energy. Something isn’t right with them, they’re not all “there,” and in the same way positive forces work through people in this world that are a match for that particular energy, so does the negative, which also helps influence these empty, not-right people’s rise into their managerial/”leadership” positions, and influences them to behave the way they do, and make the illogical, irrational, destructive, bad decisions they do, which then trickles down to every person underneath them. Create that energy feeding buffet for the neg feeders, keep things running as chaotically and unproductively as possible, which helps perpetuate an overall antagonistic, discombobulated vibe in the world as it trickles down to the employee’s personal vibes and personal lives, drive people to quit, and/or greatly stress out the employees who desperately want to quit but are in a position where they can’t (more energy feeding buffet) and overall keep things disrupted in the world, since that’s what negs absolutely thrive on.
And it’s no coincidence that these types are situated all over the place, wherever people in charge need to be. Carefully positioned pawns, if you will. Who usually then make sure to hire on more of their own types and/or employees who are going to somehow cause a lot of trouble. In the same way the real, good and positively oriented people can always recognize one of their own when out and about in the world, feeling that unconscious draw/tug towards them, so can’t the negatively oriented ones.
It all may sound over the top to some, and yet there’s simply no denying how many people in charge in this world from small and medium sized companies to large corporations, (this particular temp gig I’ve been referencing was a medium sized publishing company….) on up to political institutions and the world leaders themselves are completely inept and usually negative, and have no business being where they are. They seem to serve no purpose other than to instigate chaos, negativity, discord and destruction. Nobody can figure out how they manage to get there….and nobody can get them to leave or be fired. Why is that? Rhetorical question. What I’ve witnessed at various companies of completely different industries around the country since I first started working in 1991 is a microcosm of the bigger situation happening in the world. I’ve ranted to myself numerous times about how the way in which everything runs in this world is the absolute worst, most opposite way things should be done, and it’s just so over the top as to be obvious that this is how certain “stuff” wants it to be. They don’t want a united, harmonious, well oiled machine because it doesn’t suit their agenda and feeding needs. Whether on the macrocosm level of world governments and things that operate from the federal/beaurocratic and military levels, on down to the microcosm aspects that fill in the rest of the cracks of society.
And some may be wondering whether these troublemaker bosses are even consciously aware of what they’re doing and the negative energy that seems to be driving them, and I think in many cases, if not most, the answer is no. When it comes to the really big positions however, I’m sure they do. But in the everyday smaller situations they’re probably just being themselves, which is a match for a certain type of energy/force, which then has an easy time connecting to them and manipulating the world puppet show at large.
Considering the content of my latest article, “The Hidden Puppetmasters” and everything else on my website I probably seem like I see “hidden forces operating in our reality!” under every rock and around every corner. And, uh, yeah I apparently do actually. And I’m unabashedly proud of it. :D Once you’re clued in to this sort of thing you can’t pretend you don’t know and deny things that flagrantly seem to point in that direction. To be fair though there are definitely good bosses in the world, no doubt, and I’ve had a few. The good ones really stand out though because unfortunately it’s far more common to experience the negative/crazy ones throwing wrenches in the works at every turn.
ADD ON – February 23, 2015. An article was just sent to me by somebody who was aware of my……interesting “adventures” in the work place, because the article matched up to stuff I’d ranted about to them in an email. :D But the article is called Snakes at the Water Cooler: The Reptilian Presence at the Office by author Cassie. The article is about what the title says – the (negative) reptilian energy’s very negative affects on a work place, including the archetypal characters you’ll encounter at a reptilian dominated job, their stereotypical checklist of behaviors, all the shenanigans that ensue, and the damaging psychological toll it takes on the non-reps. Basically I described in this “Thoughts” write up so much of what Cassie writes about in her article, without even realizing it. (which goes to show how accurate her article is, which btw came out 11 years ago……!) This article is so freaking accurate of the things I’ve witnessed and experienced firsthand over the years in my working world adventures that it’s kind of scary, which is why I definitely have to recommend it.
What could be scarier than Grays and Negs?
Recently a reader commented in an email that she found many of my experiences terrifying. Which is understandable, I mean, I’ve had a lot of very weird, woo woo happenings, especially years back. (though not so much at this point in life.) Things that most people probably have never experienced, so it does indeed sound scary. But recently I’ve been pondering on how it’s not the Gray aliens or neg entities that are so terrifying. It’s other people. Yes, neg entities can be oogedy boogedy….so long as you believe in their power. But the second you stop, they can’t hold on and beat a fast retreat. People though? That’s a whole other story.
Seriously though………if you can survive a world amongst people then how hard is it to face off against a neg entity?? Think about that for a second.
Every day most of us leave our safe, secure places of residences and willingly put ourselves in the path of……………………..other human beings. O.o :D
Case in point: My current temp job is at a local university, where I report to the department’s secretary, sitting at a desk located outside her office. (that’s it, that’s the example. the end. Yup, people are scary. :D j/k.) But yesterday I was forced to overhear one of the PhD level instructors standing in her doorway, regaling the world with his tale of crazed road rage. This Phd level Dr. Instructor is a white guy in his early 50s maybe, by my estimation, really cocky, and somebody who takes pride in being the guy who throws a wrench in the works, based on other conversations I’ve overheard from him. So that’s him in a nutshell. So apparently while he was out driving on the 95, up here in Palm Beach County and the Boca Raton area, a woman obliviously cut him off. Which yeah, can be annoying, no doubt. He immediately snapped into Rage mode, and started honking like crazy, getting up alongside her, keeping the horn going and gesturing wildly. When she proceeded to ignore him despite his mad attempts at gaining her attention he completely lost his shit. After that, it was on.
Now, I’m not holier than thou, I’ve been in this situation myself, with some woman (here in south Florida) who didn’t see me and suddenly veered over, cutting me off like I wasn’t even there, almost causing an accident that was narrowly avoided by probably less than 2 inches….and who then proceeded to ignore me as I honked. “I don’t see you….don’t care….screw you.” So yes, I get how it can be aggravating…………but life goes on. Right? Well, not for PhD instructor dude it doesn’t. For him this was an invitation to go apeshit crazy. He began to give chase to this woman on the 95……….for miles, apparently. Honking, screaming and gesturing, and when he’d catch up to her he’d point at her with a stabbing finger and mouth “YOU’RE GONNA DIIIEEEEEE!!!” as he relayed with proud bravado. That’s what really got me about the whole thing too……..how proud he was. At no point did it ever occur to him that what he did was embarrassing, or wrong, or even slightly out of line in any way, and that maybe he should uh….keep this little story to himself? Maybe lay low afterwards?? You know, just pretend that little indiscretion never happened? Nope.
So the female target finally pulled over on the highway and was making a call on her cell phone, most likely calling the police he guessed. But as he relayed, “So what, you know? She can’t see my license plate!” laughing and grinning. Meanwhile the department secretary laughed hysterically at every word of this unfolding road rage tale, egging him on and thus, indirectly confirming to him that what he did was cute and funny. Normally she’s a nice woman, but as I’d already noticed by my second day on the gig her personality is such that she laughs and agrees with anything that anybody says, no matter what. She’s somebody who’s a master of just agreeing and going along, placating people and ego stroking. “Yes, yes, I know, I know…” while nodding with furrowed brows, pretending to empathize with things I’m sure she doesn’t care about, laughing and laughing at things that aren’t even funny, while telling people “You’re hysterical!” I think it comes from years of dealing with all the students and their questions and issues, but now she’s just running on autopilot with it.
So after the woman got out her cell phone he said he continued past to make her seem like he was scared and giving it up……..only to circle back around via some interchange on the 95, come up behind her and continue where he left off. When I originally thought he did this on surface streets I didn’t think much of that particular detail. But now knowing he was on a major busy highway like the 95, and had to circle back around via an interchange…..?! Wow. So there was more chasing, honking, screaming, pointing, and telling her she was going to die. Until eventually he decided to give it up.
As I relayed to my boyfriend Tom, I’m prettttttttyyyy sure that had the vehicle been a carload of guys, especially down in Broward or even Miami, then he wouldn’t have even considered doing what he did. He did what he did because he assessed up the “threat” of this female by herself, determined her to be no threat at all, and combined with the arrogance and invincible mentality that often goes along with so many PhD people anyway, decided she was safe to target.
And after he was done proudly regaling everybody within earshot of his “hysterical” tale of crazed road rage, he proceeded to head off to go teach his next class, dressed in his professional white collar clothes, complete with the eye glasses, where according to “Rate My Professor” he’s been rated a top notch professor and one of the student faves. Looking as completely normal as could be. Nothing to give away his behavior from earlier. Who would ever think the outer appearance masked such a bad ass gangster??? I am truly amazed!!!! o.O
And the scary part is, the world is filled with these people, just….walkin’ around, blending in. Looking completely normal, even holding high up jobs out there in the Matrix Real World, sometimes with PhDs even, but who underneath are ready to snap on a dime and go apeshit crazy. Over petty nonsense.
Which brings me back to my original point. I’d rather deal with a neg entity coming around in the middle of the night, trying to be a parasite, sometimes even looking “ooooh…..creepy!!” then to deal with other people. And it seems nowadays so many people are just hanging on by a thread, psychologically. Whether it’s going disproportionally apeshit on the drop of a dime, or just mentally losing it with some sort of psychological break. Last year I mentioned on my site (in my “Headline Dissection” section) about our then-upstairs neighbor Becky back in Virginia who had a bipolar mental meltdown in June 2012, of which we were witnesses because we could hear everything going on upstairs. And the end result was that she wound up driving around in the middle of the night totally naked, until the cops found her and she was hospitalized. Then she was released….then hospitalized again, because her meds weren’t the right cocktail.
And now fast forwarding to the present, and how a couple of weeks ago our next door neighbor Earl here in Boca – who by the way, is (now “was”…..he lost his job a long time ago due to mental illness I learned as I update this) a PhD adjunct professor at another local (prestigious) university – had a total psychological meltdown as well. Apparently he’d gone like a week without sleep, as we later learned, though the reasons for this remain unclear. We’d already begun noticing an issue over the weekend of October 4th, 5th and 6th (2013) when we overheard him outside on the apartment’s hallway/balcony talking to himself, which included speaking gibberish. Tom had noticed during that time period that he never seemed to go to sleep, remaining up all night long, which is not like him. But it culminated on the morning of October 7th, when Earl came knocking on our door when I was at work. Tom let him in, and Earl proceeded to mumble something about how “poison was getting pumped into his apartment,” and he wanted to see if it was happening here too….and then he started going into our coat closet, rooting through stuff, and knocking on our walls, roaming the apartment in a daze, alternating between sentences that made sense, and then total gibberish, until Tom directed him down to the apartment complex office because he had no idea how to handle this. Tom watched from our apartment and saw that Earl did go into the office, and that eventually a friend showed up to collect Earl, and they drove away someplace. Yet Earl was back that same evening like nothing had happened. So obviously nobody he came into contact with in the office, or his so-called friend really noticed or did anything about what was happening. They just let him go on his way.
And it was back to the roaming/pacing around outside, sweating, and talking gibberish to himself. Then later in the middle of the night (early Tuesday morning by that point) he was down in the parking lot roaming around, periodically yelling out crazy scary sounding noises that were almost animalistic. My eyes flew open in bed at 4:45 am after hearing one of those noises, with my nerves on end. I jumped out of bed and went out into the living room where Tom was still up, on his computer (he’s nocturnal). I just stood there, with this alarmed look, and went “Is that Earl?!” He just nodded, saying this has been going on all night. My response to the noises Earl made and his unstable behavior was more scared/alarmed then dealing with most any of the neg entities I’ve tangled with. I think probably because Earl is normally a sweet guy (and I mean genuinely sweet, not fake “psychopathic masking” sweet, though I’ve always noted that he doesn’t seem to be all there mentally….) so this behavior was shocking. He’s normally this totally affable, kind and generous guy from the Caribbean, complete with the accent, who’s fond of cooking big homemade meals on the holidays and inviting all the neighbors over to join in on the meal for free, no reciprocation expected.
Needless to say it was finally me who took action and contacted the apartment complex office the next morning to report what had been going on. Not in an angry/complaining way, but in an alarmed, “why is nobody doing anything about this?!?” sort of way. The first girl I spoke with has her own obvious issues she’s dealing with, as I’ve described her as acting like she’s “tranqued out of her head all the time.” Totally passive, slow energy, talks super low key, and just seems dazed. Not because of low intelligence I suspect, but more likely that she’s on some sort of mood related psych medication. In a confused daze she relayed that noooo…nobody else had reported anything with Earl acting crazy…..then she passed me on to the actual office manager named Cindy, who’s a super nice, with-it woman. Cindy explained that it was “tranq girl” as I’ll call her, who was in the office when Earl came in yesterday, so she herself didn’t get a chance to interact with him. (which probably explains why nothing was done. :/ Tranq girl is always in a daze, so, how would she even be able to recognize somebody else having issues, let alone do anything about it? :/ ) But Cindy immediately acted on what I reported, and called the non-emergency police number to have an officer come out and check on Earl. The long story short is that the check resulted in discovering that Earl hadn’t slept in almost a week, and he was taken away to a hospital, where he spent several days recovering. Now he’s back home and looking and acting like nothing even happened.
The problem is, I don’t think the issue stemmed from just some random, recent bout of no sleep, because weeks back there was an incident where I came home from work, and there was Earl sitting outside, working on some class-related paperwork at his patio table, and he cheerfully said hi and started chatting with me……….but I couldn’t understand a thing he was saying. O.o It went above and beyond his heavy Caribbean accent, it was just total nonsense. My eyes just got big and I nodded like, “uh, okay…yeah….uh huh….um, I gotta go now…..see you later….” then I ducked inside. When I saw Tom I mouthed “oh….my…..GOD!!! I DON’T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK HE JUST SAID!! WHAT’S HE EVEN TALKING ABOUT?!? OH MY GOD!!!” laughing. So, whatever the problem is, there’s more to it then meets the eye. According to Cindy this has happened once before, though not nearly as severe as the recent breakdown, and she indicated that he’s on medication.
And meanwhile he gets up and goes to teach class several days a week at a prestigious university. O.o And nobody ever noticed anything was amiss several weeks ago when he spoke gibberish to me. I could not have been the only person he came into contact with several weeks back whom he spoke nonsense to. And if I hadn’t contacted the office during the actual full on breakdown, then how many more days was Earl was supposed to be out wandering the balcony and the parking lot sweating profusely, talking gibberish, and intermittently yelling like an animal before anybody noticed or did something???
And that’s the world we live in, and it’s what’s scaring me. Nobody notices. And nobody cares. How many people are relying on meds to keep it together and to be able to function on a day to day basis? What’s going to happen if society’s infrastructure breaks down, and people run out of their meds? You have so many people walking around who look normal on the outside, but who are either total sociopaths on the inside, like the road rage instructor mentioned earlier, or, psycholgically fragile and needing to rely on meds to keep it together. And right now, so long as the world continues to remain relatively “okay” then everything’s…..okay. But take away the stable infrastructure, and then what? What’s road rage instructor going to do when a person really infringes upon him in some way? If that’s how he reacts to somebody cutting him off and daring to not acknowledge his ego when times are good, and he’s got a well paying secure job, food in his belly, a roof over his head, and all his needs provided for?? Hate to see what he turns into when times are bad. O.o
The recent manufactured “government shut down/debt ceiling crisis” has brought all of this to the forefront of my mind, because for the first time in years we were truly on the brink of things falling apart. Again, despite how manufactured it all is. People who are aware know the plan has always been to dismantle the current infrastructure and establish “the dawn of a new day,” as Jordan Maxwell has described it in his research. But to see that we’re on the brink of it finally starting to happen is a little freaky. And even if it’s manufactured that doesn’t make it any less scary. And not scary for the usual reason people might think, such as their creature comforts being taken away, and food shortages. But for the sole reason of….other people, and the way they’re going to react.
Years back I said that one of the scariest scenes I’d ever seen in a movie wasn’t any paranormal/supernatural scene, in some “horror” movie. It was a scene in “War of the Worlds,” where Tom Cruise’s character and his family are driving in the only working vehicle, and get accosted by a crazed, frenzied crowd of people desperate to get their hands on that van. Screaming, trampling over each other and smashing out the windows, yanking them from the van, beating the shit out of them, with no regard for each others humanity. Total STS animalistic panic mode. When I saw that scene in the theater it was really alarming, and a reminder of how things really can go. And it’s scarier then any paranormal woo-woo that I’ve ever encountered.
It will be interesting to see what’s going to happen in the next 1-2 years, that’s all I can say.
The passing of Stuart Wilde…and why it’s good to not make anybody your guru.
This will be a (relatively) quick entry, just kind of commenting on the passing of Stuart Wilde on May 1, 2013. Readers who’ve perused my recommended books and websites section will know that I’ve recommended several of his books over the years, as well pointing people towards some of his articles and such. (while in recent times also making sure to put a disclaimer, due to the direction he’d gone during the last couple years of his life. !! Way too many contradictions and delusional statements going on.)
But with the news of Stuart’s recent passing on May 1st, more and more people are coming forward discussing the downside of Stuart’s…… personality defects you could call them. cough. !! The alcoholism and drug use, ripping people off with weird, useless new age gadgets, the exorbitantly priced seminars that funded his extravagant lifestyle, which in itself contradicted his message of minimalism and going “Tao,” the delusional proclamations about all sorts of who knows what, and worse yet, the way in which him and his cronies targeted the attractive females who attended his groups, playing the game of “separation through paranoia and fear.”
The last one really got my interest, only because my boyfriend and I experienced the opposite form of this with a very well known and currently still quite prominent internet metaphysical group that my boyfriend used to be a part of years ago, headed by a middle aged female and her husband. This group is no longer headquartered in the U.S., and basically is more or less all done through the internet, but back when they did still live in the U.S. my boyfriend had met up with them a couple of times in person, and one of those times I tagged along for fun. But as it turned out, the female leader of this group is quite fond of trying to get the male members of the group to break up with their female partners/wives by convincing them that their partners aren’t “co-linear” with their beliefs, and even better……..are energy vampire Organic Portals. (but especially when the girlfriends/wives aren’t members of the group, which was the case with me.) Once she gets the males to ditch their non-co-linear organic portal nuisances then I guess she now gets to have the males’ undivided attention (and money donations) all to herself I take it. I really don’t know or understand what purpose it serves, but what I do know is that years after we experienced this, my boyfriend still hears from people who write to him via his website telling him that the female leader is still engaging in this behavior. He heard from one female only several weeks ago actually, who was still hurt and reeling from what happened with her boyfriend who was convinced to believe she was an “organic portal” and thus, ditched her. So even though I don’t fully get the “why’s” behind it, I do know that it is still happening, and I definitely wasn’t the first girlfriend she targeted. Or the second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh…..
So I admit it was a little surprising to hear that Stuart had basically been up to the same exact schtick, only, trying to remove the male partners/husbands of the attractive female group members, with the purpose of being able to sleep with the now available women. I knew the dude had problems, and Tom and I had pointed them out to each other for years, while shaking our heads, because even over the internet it was clearly evident. But even I was a little surprised to hear that behind the scenes with his inner circle he took things to that level. It’s one thing to be a bumbling alcoholic who sometimes cranks out incoherent blog postings, and it’s one thing to behave as if you’re schizophrenic, and it’s one thing to be prone to delusions of grandeur, but it’s another to knowingly, deviously, try to break up relationships with lies, all for self serving sexual gratification. It’s just a different level.
Despite all of the above Stuie shenanigans however, I more or less just have a shoulder shrugging attitude about it all. Because despite being a fan of his writings, I never made him a “guru” of sorts for myself, and I never shelled over hundreds/thousands of dollars to go follow him around and attend his seminars, I would never have even thought of drinking Ayahuasca with him, or anybody else, and I wasn’t stupid enough to buy his products. Probably sounds obnoxious to say, but that’s what it is. It’s something I talked about years ago back on the now defunct Noble Realms message board that Tom ran, but it’s the simple idea of not putting anybody above you on a pedestal. (This came up with regards to David Icke, when an NR member expressed his growing disenchantment and disappointment in something David Icke did, or was doing, because he was a big fan.)
It’s okay to get inspiration from other people’s words and ideas……….but leave it at that. Don’t mistakenly believe they are more than they are. Always know that they are just fallible humans. Nobody here is a god. Everybody is just a fallible human. When you don’t put people on pedestals then you won’t be hurt or disappointed when they do something that goes against who you mistakenly believe they are. They key part of that phrase being “who you mistakenly believe they are.” Because that’s the big issue. People often see what they want to see, and they project onto others what they need them to be. I’ve experienced it myself over the years just having this website. I can’t even count how many people have projected onto me who they wanted/needed me to be for them, and the second I went against their mistaken assumptions by saying something in an email that veered away from what they thought they understood about me they popped their tops. It’s nuts. And I’m just little ol’ me, some chick out there in the world with a small website in the corner who doesn’t promote myself and whom most people haven’t even heard of. Forget somebody to the level of Stuart Wilde, and the kinds of projections people were putting onto him.
On the one hand he talked all this Tao Zen talk, so it’s kind of understandable that people expected him to be a certain way. But on the other he didn’t exactly try to hide his glaringly contradictory lifestyle, with the alcohol, drugs, and being a “perpetual traveler” that travels around the world living in high end hotels. He was very open about that. What exactly did people think he was doing with those $800 a pop exorbitant seminar fees? ;) I mean, come on. It doesn’t mean it was right, and it’s not something I myself would engage in, but it was all there out in the open for people to see…..if they only would have. There are also vids on YouTube showing Stuart engaging in Q&A sessions with his audience……and where it’s very clear that his answers have very little substance and the dude was just bullshitting his way through things. Vague, generic, bringing nothing to the table, and stuff the audience could have come up with on their own if they’d wanted. I remember watching one of those and kind of laughing to myself like, Really dude? Wow. I knew then I’d definitely never pay to see him speak somewhere. :D
With Stuart Wilde, I still feel, despite what I now know, that much of what he wrote was right, and very useful…….even if it wasn’t really him writing it. O.o Which is now coming to light. That he, like many professional guru authors out there, was most likely using “ghost writer help.” And even though he apparently wasn’t able to follow his own words (or words that were supposed to be coming from him, ha) and walk the walk it doesn’t change the fact that much of them were still correct. The dude and/or his ghost writers knew what people needed to be doing, but he quite obviously wasn’t able to do it himself. So, for me anyway, much of the message is still valid, even if the messenger himself was actually a big bucket of Fail. Since I felt that a lot of his writings did have value I just picked and sifted my way through his work. Namely I just focused on his books and articles, weeding out whatever nonsense and contradictions were mixed up within them, and didn’t even pay attention to any of the rest of what he did, from shilling weird new age gadgets, to making delusions of grandeur claims that nobody could prove, to hosting $800 a pop seminars. (Though I admit, by the end it was getting increasingly more difficult to do even that, since so many of his blog postings were dreck. What would get me were the vids that he posted from like, YouTube or something, supposedly showing real UFOs captured on video, but which were clearly hoaxed. And not even very well, either. Or other vids that were just stupid hoaxed nonsense conspiracy stuff that anybody with a brain should have been able to notice. Or vids that he was claiming supposedly made a certain point but which in fact were making the opposite point, if he’d only actually watched the vid and had listening/viewing comprehension. Or the way in which more and more posts were about mindless celeb drivel. It was like, what is this nonsense?? Who’s really putting out this blog?? O.o So I stopped checking in to his site for a while, but then caved in and eventually went back to checking in, out of pure curiosity, like a train wreck you can’t look away from.)
It’s interesting too to read people commenting on the way his latter years were full of paranoia and delusions, because he began discussing the ghouls, and UFOs and the negative elements of this reality. Many people feel he’d lost his mind, and it was all due to taking Aya. That there was “pre-Aya Stuart Wilde” and “post-Aya Stuart Wilde.” As somebody who has had many a woo-woo experience in life, without the aid of drugs, I don’t just dismiss what he said, or feel that it has to be a black/white choice between Stuart’s earlier works and his latter works. Some of it was indeed loony sounding. But in my opinion there was actually a lot of truth in there too. Pick and sift, pick and sift………. And something you see a LOT of with these “groups/cults gone awry” is the way in which they take a (most likely) true and valid concept, and twist it around to use that knowledge towards negative ends. In this case Stuart using the idea of neg entities/ghouls to convince a female that her boyfriend either was one, or had some serious neg/ghoul activity surrounding him so therefore she needs to ditch him. Or like that other internet metaphysical group/cult I mentioned at the beginning, who uses the idea of Organic Portals (which I still actually think has validity) to convince all the male members that their female partners are one, so they get rid of them. Disgruntled people often then make the mistake of throwing the entire concept out the window because it was misapplied towards devious ends. So, it’s something to be aware of.
Stuart’s gone now, but other guru leaders and metaphysical/spiritual/religious/philosophical groups still exist, and they always will so long as there’s a potential audience for them. That’s never going to change. So if your goal is to grow and evolve and be a better person, but without getting taken advantage of and seriously derailed by tricksters, then when it comes to any group it’s better to pick and sift and find what parts of what they’re saying that works for you, but while staying on the sidelines. Definitely use others’ words and ideas as inspiration to help you get to where you’re trying to go, if that helps, just don’t get too sucked in, putting all your eggs in one basket, and completely following some leader by putting them on a pedestal, swallowing whole everything and anything they say, do or promote. And just as important, be willing to see when there’s problems developing, gross contradictions, and/or devious behavior. Don’t be afraid to question what you’re seeing or reading. Call it out, it’s okay. Even if nobody around you is. Remember the story “The Emperor’s New Clothes”? ;) Exactly. Somebody has to be brave enough to stand up and say something. (You see this nervous fearfulness and reluctance to be the one standing up and questioning nonsense and bad behavior with any religious/metaphysical/new age group or cult.)
It’s just in my view that no one group or person holds all the answers.
What the frickity frack was going on back in March and April 2012??
[A few email excerpts from readers are at the end of this entry]
An actual update to my site…..strange, I know. !!! It’s not much though, and I probably should have posted this oh, I don’t know…..back in May. [2012] But whatever. I wasn’t sure at the time if it was actually worth talking about, but the longer I’ve thought about it I figured it was worth mentioning.
I don’t even know how to begin with this one, other than to say something very strange seemed to be going on with time back in March and April (2012). Which is reminiscent of an earlier entry in this section concerning “When Time is Off.” So the subject may be a bit redundant. And I don’t mean to turn this into a “blog,” that focuses on every weird little anomaly that I think I’m perceiving with reality. But with March it was like time slowed down…..freakishly so. March was like the month that just wouldn’t die. It felt like it took six weeks to get through those 31 days. Then April kicked in. boomboomGone! Before it had even started we were already approaching May, and me, and other people were doing double takes and asking “WHAT the…?!?!?!”
But it’s more than that. Me and one of my ‘net friends named Kurt both independently concluded that we felt like we’d actually lost a week in April. It wasn’t just that it passed by so quickly, it was that we’d only experienced about three weeks of it. YET…..paradoxically we both also realized and agreed that we could account for the entire month. We both remember being at our jobs, seeing the dates go by each day, remembering various things we did throughout the month. There was no actual “missing week” per se…….but yet there was. Which makes no sense, I know. How do you lose a week when you remember each week?
But it’s even more than that. As Kurt said to me recently in an email when we were talking about this phenomenon again (all email excerpts posted with permission from him, bolded words my own emphasis): “I had been writing the dates down on stuff at work, so WHY was I so astounded that it was already the end of the month? It’s like I knew it was the end of the month, but there was also a part of me that DIDN’T know it. It was so amazingly strange.”
Yeah, I’ll say. !! For me I had the same exact bizarre “knowing but not knowing.” Back story: April 25th is “Administrative Professionals Day,” and it was a very pointed day for us at my job, for reasons I won’t sidetrack onto, but needless to say it was a very pointed day, and I was WELL aware of the date, because I was also this close to turning in my resignation that afternoon. In turning in my two weeks notice resignation it means I was obviously well aware of the date and what my end date would be. I remember seeing myself playing around with the paper flip calendar that sat on my desk, analyzing dates and fantasizing about quitting my job and what the last day would be should I turn in my resignation that day. :D I didn’t go through with it (on that particular day…) but that’s not the point….
……because then April 27th rolls around. Two days later. I’m sitting at my desk and a woman from HR comes by to give me some lapel pins that I’ll need to include with next month’s anniversary letters that I send out, and I realize with a jolt…….I haven’t even created next month’s anniversary letters yet because I’d completely lost track of the date. Something that hadn’t happened before. In fact when she came in to give me the pins for the May letters I couldn’t even place at first what the date/month was. There was total confusion for a split second.
After she left and I was back by myself I sat there, feeling befuddlement, almost akin to “missing time” that abductees report. It was to that level. I stared at the date looking back at me on my phone clock, April 27th, feeling like something was seriously wrong. I couldn’t wrap my mind around it. To me it felt like it should only be about the third week of April. (and actually, it felt like it was only yesterday that it had been March.) I didn’t just dismiss it either, thinking I was crazy or that I’d just been too distracted by life or something to really pay attention. I actually ruminated over the whole thing, retracing my steps through April, and I remembered how in particular it seemed that every time I turned around it was already Friday again. Which is the opposite of how things normally go. Usually Friday can’t come fast enough. During one particular Friday it actually gave me a slight pause, because it felt distorted. And the more I thought back on it all I realized…..it feels like this month was only about three weeks long. I feel like I’m missing a week. Hence, why it “should” only be the third week of April. Yet, I realized I could account for every week as far as I could tell. There was no actual “missing week.” Yet it felt like there was. I mentioned this “time flying” thing to my coworker and she too agreed, in particular the way that every time we turned around it was suddenly Friday again. It was literally a first for both of us. Then I talked to Tom about it later on at home. He works from home, and doesn’t have that same rigid 8-5, 40 hour a week schedule that me and my coworker have, so his perspective would be really good. But he too agreed….March just dragged, and April flew by.
When I emailed my ‘net buddy Kurt in Wisconsin I thought to mention this on the offhand chance that it rang a bell with him. Kurt is really into researching the weird side of reality and in particular, the idea of these unusual times we’re living in with everything that involves. He has an open, yet discerning mind, and reads and participates in several message board forums geared towards the weird as well as having a large network of ‘net and real life friends. He pays attention to woo-woo patterns going on with his large group of real and virtual friends, and the things that people are reporting. We’d both experienced enough synchronous happenings between us by that point that I figured, if what I’m saying doesn’t ring a bell with him then it means it’s probably not happening, and it’s just me being a nut. :D So I tossed it out there in an email, to see what, if anything, he thought about it all. Now, it’s important to note that I didn’t mention that it felt like it should only be the third week, or that I felt like I was actually missing a week. I left that part out of things. But surprisingly I got this response back:
“Jesus, Carissa, this just keeps getting weirder and weirder. LOL.
This morning, shortly after I sent you that email, I got a text message from April. Her son needs minor surgery in May, and she asked me if we could do a shift-switch so that she could be at the hospital with him. Of course I said yes, and she texted me the dates. It was like the 10th and 11th of May. I thought to myself “that’s fine…that’s like a whole month away yet”, and I glanced down at the date on my taskbar. My jaw seriously dropped. I literally said “what the fuck?!” out loud. Thinking that the date on my computer was screwed up, I got my phone and looked at the date on it. It was the same on my phone…April 27th. I was honestly in shock. I thought it was mid-April, like the 13th or 14th.
Sooooo…I of course freaked out, realizing that I had to go around and pay bills and send out my rent check QUICKLY. I scrambled around, took money out of the bank, and was running around all flustered paying my bills. I was parked outside city hall to pay my electricity bill when I got your email on my phone. I literally laughed out loud when I read what you wrote about April.
Seriously…what the fuck?!?
It’s like I completely slept through an entire week in April.
The weird thing, to me, is that at work we have to write the date down on the router, and I can remember writing down stuff like 4/21, 4/23, etc, so why was I so utterly shocked this morning at the date?!? I knew it wasn’t mid-April, so why did I think it was?
And then when I got your email, I was like “wow….”.
So yeah. I thought that would amuse you. :) Something is definitely going on. I don’t even question that anymore.”
Like Kurt, I’d obviously written down dates, and had memories of the entire month, and even had that one pointed day on April 25th, only two days prior. Yet here I was feeling befuddled like none of that had happened. It just did not make any sense. Even stranger, later on in May when reflecting back on Admin Professionals Day and how I’d almost given my notice before leaving work I realized it felt to me like that had actually happened a week or so later, in May, instead of happening before. And when I mentioned that to Tom he actually frowned a little, puzzled, and totally agreed with me that in his memories it felt like that had occurred sometime in May. But no, that was clearly April 25th.
Talk about distorted time.
March was a weird one though, with the way it dragged, and also with the total sense of foreboding doom that I and several others I’m in contact with had. Kurt in particular noted about that time period:
“And there’s the whole thing with the week of the solar flares in March (around the 22nd or so, right?). Before that week, I had been working on my bugout bag like crazy, buying things for it, and listening to podcasts about survival and survival skills. All while being in a weird, cranky, on-edge mood. And then all of a sudden, all of that just stopped and everything went back to normal. Now, my bugout bag sits in the dining room, untouched since March, and I haven’t listened to a survival podcast since that week. It was almost like all of that was a kind of programmed backup plan in case whatever happened/was supposed to happen that week actually happened.”
Same here. During March Tom and I pulled out our “bug out bags” and cleaned things out and even bought new supplies from the outdoor/camping store, as well as online. I was reading one of the survival books we have on hand during my lunch breaks, brushing up on things, and all of us were watching survival shows (like “Dual Survival.” :D Love that show, we watch downloaded episodes on our computer. Yeah, that’s right, you can concentrate a weak beam of low angled late afternoon sunlight through a bag of urine and make it spark your tinder to get a fire going. :D :D :D ) I had no sense of the future beyond March, feeling a deep sense of depression and hopelessness about things, and refused to make any plans “until we make it to April.” Come to find out that one of my ‘net friends named Lydia (whom I have met up with in person several times) who now lives in Colorado was feeling the exact same way – not making any plans until we at least make it to April. So we had people scattered about in Wisconsin, Virginia and Colorado all feeling the same depressed feeling of foreboding, and wanting to see if we can even “make it to April” before moving forward in life. (When we passed April 1st I emailed Lydia, with the subject line saying “We made it!”)
Then once we did make it to April, after the long, never ending month that felt like it dragged on for six weeks, it was like something just….lifted. It was like we had “made it.” As Kurt noted he put aside the renewed bug out bag obsession, specifically having the thought that “This isn’t really important at this moment…things have changed for now” pop into his mind, and it was the same here on our end. Just as suddenly as I frantically began “cramming” for survival tips I dropped it, the need evaporating. For now, at least.
What cemented my idea that we weren’t just imagining things in terms of how we were perceiving time in March and April was the way that three of my – very mainstream, non-woo woo – coworkers were still commenting as of mid May about the way March just draaaaaaaaagggggggggged, and the way April just flew by in a blink. The fact that a) they had even noticed, and b) were still talking about it incredulously all these weeks later, says to me that something was indeed amiss.
What was actually happening back then, I don’t know. But in talking to different people the general idea is that it seems something big and catastrophic was supposed to happen in March, involving what though, I don’t know. I deduced that whatever it was, it was small enough that we stood a chance of surviving through it – otherwise, why the urge to brush up on survival skills – but it was large enough to ruin our way of life for a very long time. If not permanently. Hence, the feeling of intense foreboding depression, like everything was pointless and nothing mattered anymore. And somehow, whatever this event was, it was averted. And the process of the aversion, however that worked and whoever was behind it, caused some major time anomalies, noticed very loudly by even the most mainstream “matrix” of people. That’s all I’ve got. I’d be curious to hear from anybody who may have also experienced something during March and April of 2012 or who has any insight into what it may have involved. carissaconti@protonmail.com
*****
A few email excepts from some readers, all posted with permission (bolded words my own emphasis):
From Alaska: “…. Anyways, my jaw dropped for a few minutes when I checked out the top entry of your ‘Thoughts’ page. Although I’ve mentioned bits here and there to friends regarding this topic, I’ve never had the heart to tell the whole story (until now, thanks to you!):
March 2012 was perhaps the weirdest month in recent memory. Many elements caused me a lot of confusion, especially since I’m the classic ‘Type A Personality’: organized, controlled, contained.
First was an odd combination of emotional chaos and psychological fatigue. Emotionally, I was fraught with quick cycles between extreme depression and destructively hedonistic tendencies. The only other time I’d experienced this was during my two battles with cancer between the ages of 20 and 25, which I honestly didn’t know if I was going to live or die on a week-by-week basis. I experienced the exact same sensation four years later. At the time, I assumed it was some form of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder from my health issues, but there wasn’t any particular event that triggered it.
Secondly I noticed my usual skill at time management was gone. Kaput. I had landed a lucrative project with a client in the second week of February and had projected the completion date by the end of March. I’d already completed over half the project by the first of March- yet by the end of the March, I’d only completed an additional 25%. I’d been genuinely productive for the entire four weeks, and had been somewhat aware of working more slowly than usual, but that was ridiculous. Never had I encountered that situation professionally, either before or after that time. How could I have done so little during days that never seemed to end?
[…] I never would have thought it would be possible for such a ‘Perfect Storm’ to hit and be so disruptive to every aspect of my life, but March of 2012 will always be a time period I will reflect upon as a humbling and confusing experience that made me realize that no matter how hard I try to be, I’m really not the one totally in control. […] “I forgot to add in my original story that the intense weirdness of that time period last year was attributed by the locals as being an unusually difficult case of cabin fever (that affected everyone…?) It was my tenth winter up here, and I’d never ever gone through anything like that before, so simple comparison eliminates that as a possibility….”
From Germany: “….it is only because of your article that I realized that in a very reduced way it was similar for me, too. I also experienced several weeks ago a somewhat vague but disquieting sense of foreboding doom with an accompanying reluctancy to wait and see. I can say that time did seem to pass rather slowly during the past months for me, too. Then on a whim I borrowed two sets of survival DVDs from the city library and had repeated thoughts about refreshing our (very modest) emergency water supply (which I didn’t do in the end :/ ) . I also bought a new pocket-knife with survival scenarios in mind. I’m living in Europe and not the USA so that could explain why what I experienced seems only like a damped down version of your experience because maybe the whole strangeness was more about your part of the world.”
From the U.S.: “I can, however, confirm that on a personal basis, March was an exceptionally “heavy” month for me, and what made it unique was that there weren’t any personal reasons going on at that time that could explain why everything was so…well, heavy. Time did seem to speed up in April, but this was only unique for me in contrast to the previous month – it has seemed to me as though time has been accelerating exponentially for at least a decade, and so April merely seemed as though things were back to “normal”.
From Pennsylvania: “There certainly was something ‘not right’ about March – because I didn’t feel too ‘good’ either (and not because of what happened to my friend) – but just in general. It felt like a ‘black depression’ type of month and I certainly hope to never experience it again. It just seemed like all this ‘heavy/dark’ stuck energy (on the collective) reared its head that month and was finally pushed away (hence April going by fast). I feel that the ‘heavy/dark’ energy is what made that month feel so awful and made it go so seemingly slow.”
From New Mexico: “Just to give you some idea of what I mean; last night I pulled up your blog because I have been experiencing time lines being really off. My mom each week for the last 3 months has been saying “It’s Friday again”…time is literally flying! I just read what you said this in a recent update about this under “Thoughts”! Then, I am trying to figure out what happened in April, because there is a week that is just gone…I can’t place it, I know it happened, but I couldn’t put my finger on it!! 2 weeks ago I was documenting when my start date was at my new job (April 20th), but I couldn’t remember it for the life of me. I had to keep looking at my calendar, trying to put the timeline together, but I couldn’t…and why it’s so strange is, my youngest son’s birthday is April 23rd and that was my official first full day…but I don’t remember it…I don’t remember his birthday. I recall us having a little dinner with family that night, but it’s like it never happened!”
From Hungary: “As for depression, according to my logs I had suicidal thoughts several times in March…”
From California: “I’ve only written you once before and that time it was simply to say “Thank You”, this time however I figured I jump in on the March/April one. While I’ve read through your site as well as Toms and found myself doing the “bouncing dog head in the back of the car deal” in agreement and understanding more than once, I have to say that even with all that’s known…this time felt different.
“A friend and I were warned last year that in March of 2012 “Hell Was Coming” (for lack of a better term). No matter how it was tried, there was never an answer given as to the (who, what, why or how)…only the when. With that warning came an odd desire to prepare. As I live in California being prepared for the unexpected kinda goes with life as you know as you never know when we’re gonna be rockin and rollin…but this again was different. I wasn’t adding to the “earthquake kit”, I was amassing a “survival kit”.
“She and I had decided that 2012 was the year she was going to come out to California for a visit and all through March when we’d talk of her visit in April, I’d always find myself saying; “IF we make it until then”. The feeling increased to such a point that we even made plans on where to meet up should all Hell break loose. What bothered me the most was the “degree and depth” of the feeling. I don’t do the whole “doom and gloom” deal. While I don’t turn and ignore, I also don’t hit the ground and surrender…as either action “feeds the enemy” so to speak. But again this was just odd. After April 1st (couldn’t relax until after just in case they pulled a “April Fools” deal lol), all I could think is that we dodged one hell of a bullet. Now what that bullet was exactly, who fired, or how or why we were able to dodge…I haven’t a bloody clue.
“Obviously tho, we made it through and after April 1st you’d think that the time would drag on waiting for her arrival. Nope…April took off like a bat out of hell on fire…and before we knew it (and I do mean before we “knew” it as the time passed but without our knowing it until we went back over the days) she was here. As this was the first time she’d visited me we made plans to go and do, so keeping track should have been something we were able to do.
“Yea well…that didn’t quite go as planned because we were continuing to lose days (so to speak), and that was with 3 of us being quite aware of the time. We knew we had experienced the days as when something would screw up we’d look back over and could “account for” (by the calendar)…but it just didn’t add up (if that makes sense). Hell even on the way back from dropping her off at the airport on the 22nd, I literally had to keep reminding myself I’d just dropped her off…that I hadn’t done it days before. Now I was fully aware that I was driving home from the airport, and had the normal thoughts and feelings of having enjoyed the visit, missing her, etc., but when I’d think of her it was in a matter of days not minutes (1 hour trip from airport to home). Now that I’d kept to myself until my daughter mentioned about 3 days after she’d been back home that it felt like she’d been gone well over a week already, again not due to the emotions, but in the passage of time itself.
“I have to admit that it being as tho it was “missing time” but not…sooooo fits. I just wish I knew what the hell. On top of that question of “what the hell happened” I also have one about what’s coming. Now again I don’t do the doom and gloom, and I don’t scare easily (besides they have others they can do that to and feed from)…I do however have an odd feeling that whatever it was, whomever etc. isn’t done (so to speak in a specific not generalized way as they’re never done lol).”
From the U.S.: “I actually just now read your article about time wonkiness in March/April 2012. I too felt a major sense of foreboding in March 2012…so much so that I got extremely suicidal and checked myself into a mental hospital to keep myself from going through with it… I honestly don’t remember much about April, but definitely in March something was going on…”
The Backdrop People
I just finished up the latest installment of Dolores Cannon’s Convoluted Universe series, Book IV, and there was something in it that really stood out. So much so I want to take to my website and bring attention to it. It concerns a concept called “The Backdrop People,” and was even mentioned as a selling point on the back cover. I love the “Convoluted Universe” series in itself, and would have bought the book regardless, but when I saw where it said “The unfamiliar concept of the Back Drop People” mentioned on the back cover I already pretty much knew exactly what it was going to involve, and it made me look forward to reading the book even more. If I was right in what I suspected, then it was definitely not going to be an “unfamiliar concept” for me.
For starters, for those who are unfamiliar with Dolores Cannon, she’s a hypnotist investigating past lives. Dolores has been regressing people for decades, and while most sessions are pretty mundane (she talks about how boring and snooze worthy most past lives tend to be :D ) every once in a while something really interesting comes out……such as parallel realities, incarnations as non-human entities, life in other realms and on other planets, future lives, the between life state, you name it, complete with the “mind candy” (as she calls it) revelations that go with them. So “The Convoluted Universe” books are a compilation of those spectacular and revelatory sessions she’s experienced with people. (Some of those incidents are so spectacular that they wind up getting their own entire book in itself, such as “The Legend of Starcrash,” “Jesus and the Essenes,” the “Nostradamus” series, and so on, and I highly recommend those as well.) I’ve always been interested in past life regression stuff and have read various books on it over the years, but you can only read so many before it just gets repetitive. Like, Okay, we get it, people live more than once and have had other lives that effect the present one, good or bad, there are lessons to be learned, karma that needs to be balanced, etc. etc. blah blah blah. So if you’re ready for something a little more, then the Convoluted Universe series are good books to read. It’ll give you stuff to ponder on, and maybe even corroborate some things…
…Which would be the case with the “back drop people.” Flash back: In my book ‘Chasing Phantoms’ I mention something that my brother relayed to me when he supposedly had his first overtly known abduction, and was supposedly able to speak with “Them” back in October 2001. To be clear, I didn’t, and still don’t, take his story at face value, and I think that whatever actually happened to him is probably not what he thinks happened or the version he relayed to me. But, it doesn’t mean something didn’t happen. And I definitely have my own proof that he was involved in “stuff” and was no normal person, by any means. So I did listen with interest to whatever revelations and insights he passed along, just in case, and diligently logged it all on my computer. Most of those insights made it into my book. And one of the insights that I passed along said this:
I always found this insight to be one of the most interesting that he relayed for some reason (next to the one about faked reality in general) because it had large implications. And definitely implications about my own reality. Due to the many jobs I’ve had in life, and all the moving around I’ve done and people I’ve lived with, and also including my immediate family, it means I’ve had to deal with my fair share of people up close and personal……and it’s shown me that something is clearly very wrong here. So much negativity, craziness, troublemakers, so many stories it’s unbelievable, and I just got to a point where I wanted to run off and go be a hermit in a cave. Just so ground down and tired of this place, and everybody in it. So hearing about the idea of empty shells, drones, puppets, background characters stood out. Based on what I’ve seen and experienced I could definitely believe it, and it would certainly explain a lot of things. However I also realized I had to be cautious of anything that Joe was relaying because there was a lot of manipulation and neg agenda stuff working through him, seeming to try to steer me in a particular negative direction, of which I discuss in my book. So, don’t just automatically believe it. Maybe it’s true. Maybe it’s not. So just put it on the back burner. And maybe eventually corroboration will come in.
And now, flash forward to 2012, and we see this in the latest “Convoluted Universe” book. (“D” stands for Dolores, and those are her questions to the hypnotized subject Suzette, who is “S.” Bolded sentences my own emphasis):
S: It’s like those people back at the cave, they’re just people. They don’t have a path. They’re just people. I had a path. That child had a path.
D: So if you choose an option, you don’t go off that path? Is that what you mean?
S: Yes. there’s just so many in this room where the crystals are that choose a life or have a path. The rest of the people aren’t sent here on a path.
D: What are their lives for then?
S: It’s like a backdrop.
That was a strange statement. I had never hard of that before.
D: What do you mean?
S: In a movie they paint something around the person so there’s a backdrop.
D: So the others don’t really have a purpose?
S: Right. They come to live, breathe, work and die.
D: Is there any hope that they might find a path, or are they a different kind of soul?
S: They didn’t choose. They’re just here to be part of the backdrop. They’re slaves. They’re slaves that go from one star system to the next and they are used as a backdrop.
D: Just to be there for these persons with a purpose.
S: Yes. For you to learn, to stay on your path, you have to have these other people in your way, living beside you, but you’re here for a lesson and they’re here for a backdrop.
D: Yes, but sometimes they create problems, to try to pull you off your path? (Yes) Is that part of their purpose, to distract you? (Yes) But when you’re in your body, you don’t know all these things, do you?
S: Not all beings are the light source. Not all light beings are the light source. They’re just here as energy to help us with our lessons, to create chaos, or to work or just to live. Certain beings go to learn the lessons for the light Source. It’s like you’re just a higher being.
D: Then the other ones, they don’t evolve to become higher beings?
S: No, they’re just energy. Like making a movie where they use extras.
D: But the ones on the path, the higher source, can they recognize each other out of all the mass of other people? (Yes) If we could do that, we wouldn’t let things bother us so much, would we?
S: That’s right.
D: If we knew they were there to add drama, I guess you would say? (Yes)
[…]
D: What is it you want Suzette to do to help?
S: Teach the young. They came here, too, but everything is going to happen quicker. They’re going to help sooner because there’s only….OH! My head hurts. (I gave her suggestions again.)
D: Why do they have to learn quicker?
S: Time is short because of these lower beings. All they want to do is hurt each other. They want to destroy each other. they want to destroy the land, which hurts the animals, the trees and the water. And in short, you have to get to the youth so they can spread the words and help heal the planet.
D: The adults are not going to be able to help?
S: The higher source adults. The others have gone from doing their jobs as backdrops to being angry. They want to be angry at somebody or something and all they want to do is kill…kill or hurt. (She winced in pain again.)
[….]
D: I’ve heard there are some that are not going to be able to be saved.
S: No. The backdrop people, but they’re angry.
D: The vibrations are changing. So the backdrop people will stay with the old Earth? (Yes) And that’s why they’re angry?
S: Yes. It’s like they’re acting and they got a script and they are playing this part, and their part is to destroy this planet.
D: they have anger about this? (Yes) But the planet cannot be destroyed, can it?
S: No. It can’t be. It’s just like when the dinosaurs died and the trees died, but everything came back to life. Not the dinosaurs or the trees, but they don’t know that part of it. But this is a beautiful planet. This is a beautiful home. Not as pretty as the crystal place, but….
D: Then the backdrop people will stay with the Earth going through all the changes, the catastrophe part?
S: Yes, they won’t survive. They’ll be gone. The others will move on. This new place will be so beautiful. The vibration will be so high and this will be a learning place.
D: That’s what I was trying to understand. It will separate into two parts?
S: Yes. It’s like two levels, and the old Earth will be on one level, and the new Earth will be on the higher level. But they won’t see each other, like they’re in two time warps.
[…]
D: So those that are left with the old Earth will live out their lives in a different way? (Yes) You said those people are not evolving at all?
S: Yes. They’re just like the backdrop, you know, like paint a picture and paint somebody on it.
D: So as the Earth goes through all the changes and catastrophes, there will be many people dying.
S: Yes, yes. there will be a lot of that. (Matter-of-factly.)
D: But they choose this before they come in anyway?
S: No, not so much choose. They’re kind of like slaves. They’re taken from one place to another to do whatever they need to do there because they are just energy.
(The following was Dolores’ own commentary after mulling this over and putting it together with other hypnosis sessions that have talked about the “two earths” and the upcoming changes and “sifting” that’s supposedly going to take place):
“It is now my opinion that these are the ones who will be left with the Old Earth, the Backdrop People because they do not have a higher vibrational purpose. They teach us lessons by their mere presence, but they are not intended to evolve further. These are the ones who will be left behind. The ones who realize their higher purpose and raise their vibration and frequency will travel on to the New Earth. There will be those who came in knowing their mission and had high ideals, but they let the negativity of the others pull them down and influence them. Those will also have to stay with the other energy on the Old Earth as they separate. This is why it is important for us to realize that it is only an illusion and find our role in the creation of the New Earth, and our part in helping others find theirs. And not be sucked into the angry energy of the Backdrop People and be stuck on the Old Earth….”
As far as the idea of a splitting earth, and a sifting, with those who evolve and move on and those who are left behind, the jury is still out on that one. It’s something I’ve heard about for years now, and I’ve made mention in my writings about splitting/diverging realms and such, which relates to that. (courtesy of learning about it from various other sources, and feeling like the concept has validity.) But I reprint all this because even if that aspect is not true, I still find the idea of “back drop”/background characters to be fascinating and important for consideration. Specifically what Dolores notes: “And not be sucked into the angry energy of the Backdrop People.”
For myself I know that for my entire life I’ve let myself get sucked down into the negative, angry energy of what could definitely be considered “backdrop people” letting them almost ruin me you could say. That’s why this resonates with me so strongly, and why I want to pass it along to others. I know that ever since my brother relayed what he did about the background drone puppets in 2001 I always kept it in mind as a possibility, but really, there’s just no way to prove such a thing. So I had intellectual knowing of a concept that could be very real, but which I was reluctant to truly implement into my daily life. Later I came across the concept of “organic portals,” which is very similar, though it’s not presented in the same way that the backdrop people are. But the gist is the same: a large percentage of the population who are basically a hive mind group soul, lacking individualization, and lacking their higher chakras and a higher self. They are incapable of spiritually growing and evolving, and don’t reincarnate the way individualized souls do. And they also apparently obtain energy from the spirited humans around them (usually through negative means) since they can’t generate it themselves. Hearing about OPs in 2002 was the first time I’d encountered material that seemed to even be remotely validating what Joe had relayed to me a year before. But I soon learned what a landmine that subject is. To say it’s “controversial” in metaphysical circles is putting it mildly. It provokes some very strong reactions in people that seem to be acting as rabidly barking gatekeeper dogs, is the only way to really put it. I can understand if someone is skeptical of an idea and/or decides, Na, this idea doesn’t work for me, I don’t believe it. But the rabid barkers seem to actually be trying to steer people away from even looking at the material, using any means possible to do so. (the big one being to liken anybody who even considers the idea of OPs as being the equivalent of Nazis who want to exterminate all the Jews. You see that comparison a lot, which is laughable. Talk about extreme leap of bad logic.) “Nothing to see here folks, move it along! Nothing to see! (insert rabid barking, ad hominem attack and other crazy bad logic to deter people away from that line of thinking.)
So I put the idea of such things back out of my head again, because again….there’s no way to prove such a thing anyway. I can’t see people’s energy, though I wish I did, and so I’m unable to know who’s who and what’s what around me via sight (Though I’ve met a few trustworthy people who do have the sight, and who’ve reported such things as non-human entities shadowing humans, and/or disguised as everyday regular people, as well as verifying that they’ve seen people with no auras and such, walking around amongst those who do have them. Which I think could be a whole other separate, though related subject in itself…..) I do a good job intuiting people, but I can’t “see” things directly. Then starting around last year I began revisiting the subject, when I began thinking “What if all those people who’ve pissed you off and dragged you down and hurt you and who you’ve invested bitter energy into for so many years…….weren’t even really real? O.o Seriously, what if they aren’t what you thought they were? What if you’ve been expending negative bitterness and frustrations and hurt feelings to the equivalent of an inanimate object?” So I’d been tossing that idea around, going back towards considering the idea again, and then I come across this in Dolores’ newest book in early 2012 talking about this exact same thing. Other than the OP’s thing, hers is the only other material that I’m aware of that delves into such a concept.
Most of us don’t have the sight and can’t know for certain if somebody is really an “OP” or a “backdrop person” just here to fill in the blanks and get in our way, as Suzette relayed, and create drama and chaos so we can learn by their mere presence. But you can certainly keep it in mind as a very likely possibility when thinking back on anybody who’s created problems for you in life, and/or creating trouble for you in the present. Knowing that the possibility exists means….there goes the negative energy you would have wasted on either nursing a past grudge or getting sucked into a current drama. Because seriously….would you sit there and get pissed at a rock, for instance? It’s a rock. What’s the point, right? Or in the case of a past grievance/hurt, just realize, Okay, I was dealing with someone who was acting like a robot. Got it. No need to harbor all this negative energy for something of that sort.”
We can’t change the “rocks” that got in our way in the past or do anything about the way in which we let them get the upper hand on us before, but we can make sure more “rocks” don’t get the best of us again. “hmmm…I could be dealing with a rock here…..Best to err on the side of assuming they’re a rock and not feed into this nonsense.” :D And most importantly, we don’t want anybody dragging us down into their pit. Can’t imagine anything worse than getting pulled off one’s path and permanently derailed….over a rock.
Just something to keep in mind, especially in these times and with whatever’s coming up around the bend……
Newbies at the vulnerable crossroads
This is another Thoughts write up that was inspired by an email exchange with a reader, and I mentioned to the reader that I would probably use my response to her to create a bigger write up for my site. So, here we are. This was something I was going to write about maybe two years ago or so, but didn’t have the energy or inspiration for it for some reason. But it has to do with newbies to conspiracy research, metaphysics and woo-woo happenings, and their vulnerability as they find themselves navigating an area they’re often times not prepared for.
Many times newbies who embark on the world of conspiracy “truther” material can find themselves descending into paranoia and fear very quickly. In particular people can find themselves paranoid about being monitored, and then “put on lists” of some sort. That’s a big one, you hear about these “lists” a lot in the world of newbie conspiracy researchers. As was the case with the woman who emailed me, she admitted to being paranoid several times in both her emails, and kept trying to get me to agree to communicate through encrypted emails and secured chats. Later I found out it was triggered by a fear of being watched and put on a list for getting involved in woo-woo discussions over at Godlike Productions. Here’s an excerpt of my response to her:
“Being honest here, I’m not going to entertain the idea of “secured chats” and “encrypted emails” and play into all that. By engaging in that it’s saying I buy into it and believe it’s necessary. And I don’t. Way back at the very beginning of me waking up to conspiracy stuff I started going down that path too, I was on the fence where I could easily have gone in one of two directions, and I’ve since noticed that most people who are waking up to the conspiracy/metaphysical truths find themselves at that precarious crossroads at the beginning of their journey. Almost like an archetype. It’s like a right of passage. But many don’t make it through. They unfortunately succumb to the fear and paranoia and then it becomes like a snowball rolling down an mountain, bigger than themselves and taking them over. They mistakenly believe this “stuff” is more powerful than it actually is, and give it waaaaay more credit than it deserves, buying into the nonsense and playing along with the games when they really should just roll their eyes at it and wave it off. […]
“I can’t reiterate enough in my book (which is free, you don’t have to pay to download it) or the gangstalking article about the kinds of woo-woo things I’ve gone through and what I learned from it all………………and how this stuff isn’t happening to me anymore. Because I changed my response to it. My attitude has been: If stuff wants to watch, let ‘em. If stuff wants to listen, let ‘em. If they’re going to do that then hey, at least give them something worth watching and listening to, seriously. When you do that you take the power away from anything that would try to have you believe it has the upper hand. When a person truly does not care then they have nothing to work with, and there’s no choice but for them to move on to somebody else. The well has dried up for them, so to speak. (And this is all stuff I say in my book, practically word for word, complete with anecdotes.) I’ve apparently been followed and monitored, had weird craziness go on, both of a physical and paranormal nature, then I finally learned what the deal is with the “fear frequency” and “the man behind the curtain” and just got to a point where I stopped caring, literally, overnight. Did a 180 in attitude from one day to the next. (This is mentioned in both the gangstalking article and in my book.) And everything stopped. Is it a coincidence? I don’t think so. Over and over again both me and my boyfriend have seen and proven for ourselves that reality directly interfaces with our thoughts, fears (or lack thereof) and conscious or unconscious expectations, then delivers based on that.
“From what I can gather, “stuff” doesn’t just erupt in a person’s life going from 0 to all out madness overnight. It has to breach one’s realm, gain a foothold, and then from there it builds. And builds. And builds, relying on the person’s negative, paranoid, fearful responses to perpetuate it to the next level, creating that snowball that gets bigger and bigger. This is how, in both of our opinions, some people get to the point where their targeting or gangstalking, or whatever it is, has gotten to such an intense level in their lives. It’s because they weren’t able to nip things in the bud back at the beginning. And I do understand about such things that like electronic frequency harassment, which is above and beyond mere “thoughts and fears interface with reality.” But in my book I talk about what me and Tom did to combat that as well, passing along the tip about electrically grounded mylar sheeting so readers could benefit from it. (including a link to the article on Tom’s site where he shows people step by step what to do to get it set up, complete with pics/diagrams.)”
“In the 6 years that my website has been up I’ve realized that this has become my #1 biggest pet issue, the one main theme that seems to come up over and over throughout my writings. I wish I could scream it from the rooftops….. “
So those were the highlights. Are there really “lists” that we’re put on, just for discussing woo-woo and conspiracy stuff? I don’t know. I tend to think not, but, I could be wrong. If there are, then I really don’t care. I think it’s all an eye rolling scare tactic. It reminds me of a my cat who likes to run around up and down the hallways sometimes for no reason and get herself worked up, fluffing her fur. :D Like something she does to amuse herself. Besides, in my own case, some “government list” is the least of my worries, considering I’ve been monitored and tagged and taken my whole life. Attention didn’t start when I suddenly became aware of things back in 2000, 2001. It was already going on, under the radar, for years. So some government “list” is the least of my worries, seriously. They’re a little late to the game. Something else already beat them to it back when I was a kid. They can take a number and get in line. :D
So for newbies as I’ve seen and experienced, they really are at a fork in the road crossroads, or, on a fence where they can fall towards either direction. But what they do and how they choose to react at the beginning will determine everything about what happens (or doesn’t happen…..) later on. A point I will return to in a moment. In my own case, I’ve referenced how I found myself kind of being thrown head first into the world of conspiracy awareness and metaphysical/paranormal happenings very suddenly in 2000, but really taking off in 2001. There was a lot coming at me, a lot of information to process and strange happenings that I didn’t understand, and I pretty much had nobody to reel me in or give me some level headed advise…..save for Tom, in late 2001, long distance. And that is unfortunately the case for most conspiracy and metaphysical/paranormal newbies. They don’t have anybody to go to to talk about this stuff, anybody who’s aware and on the level and who maybe has been there themselves and learned a few things who can give them good feedback and advise. At most, people usually only have everyday normal types around them who have no idea what the newbie is even talking about, and who have zero interest in these subjects. (In my write up “The Vortex” for instance I talk about how I had nobody around me to explain to me what in the frickity frack was happening to us in our paranormally polluted apartment back in 2000, because nobody I knew at that time had any experience with that sort of thing.) So that’s a major repeating issue that one finds with pretty much most newbies.
To clarify though, Tom didn’t help with the naive paranoia and fear I was experiencing back then, he helped just by being there in general, as somebody I could talk to about the weird stuff and brainstorm about what’s going on in this reality. A lot of it I pulled myself out of on my own, due to the nature of my no-nonsense personality. I had to figure things out in terms of the fear frequency and had to arrive at a point of being fed up with the nonsense and putting my foot down and no longer playing into the paranoia and fear-inducing games. Nobody can “make” us get there, we have to figure out the light bulb realizations on our own, for our own reasons, in our own time. (he himself also traveled the same path of having to get past the paranoia and negativity, during the same time period I was. So in a way we went through it concurrently.)
For me though it did take a little bit of time to get there…..enough time that things were starting to take root in my reality. And had I not gleaned the awareness of the fear frequency when I did at the beginning of 2003, along with several other factors coming in from the positive stuff at that same time, then in my opinion I wouldn’t be sitting here writing this right now. So, just in the nick of time I guess, because as people can see when they read Part II of my book, things were getting really weird by that point. Can’t imagine how much worse it would have gotten. ;D So that’s what I mean when I said earlier that how we respond at the beginning determines everything that happens – or doesn’t happen – later on. And I’ve seen many newbies who seemed to be “past the point of no return,” where nothing seemed to get through to the them in terms of snapping them out of the fear and paranoia, unfortunately. Instead they were on a downward spiral, kind of going crazy with it all and letting it derail them in life. But if somebody had been able to catch hold of them at the beginning, guiding them through that precarious minefield we all face at the beginning of “waking up,” then maybe things could have gone a little differently.
Something else I’ve heard a lot from newbies is that they tend to inundate themselves with so much information that they become completely overwhelmed. It’s understandable that when one is waking up to stuff that they would want to eat up as much information as possible from every source they can get their hands on, like a thirsty sponge that can’t get enough. The problem there though is that there usually is a total lack of discernment going on. Newbies too often have a tough time trying to differentiate between a valid source of information and ones that are yanking reader’s/listener’s chains. Everything gets swallowed up whole, no filters. But the fact is, a lot of the information out there is very one dimensional. It tells you one small part of the story and leaves out most of the other important puzzle pieces, so the newbie is receiving limited and skewed information that they then may run off the rails with. (Again, because they have nobody around them to guide them through the madness.) So something important for newbies to keep in mind is to keep a level head. Pace yourself and don’t overwhelm yourself. Take breaks when needed. (A lot of newbies put the pedal to the floor and just “go!go!go!go!go!” for months straight, then burn themselves out and/or get to a point where their personal frequencies are completely frazzled, then they sometimes walk away from things completely, as I’ve seen, which is just as bad. So taking breaks and pacing yourself is essential.) Use discernment and question everything. Don’t just take people’s word for something. Anybody can say anything out there, but it doesn’t mean it’s true. Also, just because something is from the “alternative media” does not automatically mean it’s closer to the truth than the mainstream media. Sometimes they’re just two sides of the same coin, causing equal amounts of problems. Try to gather up a broad range of information to get the widest possible perspective on things. And don’t allow yourself to get swept up in the paranoia. A lot of people may resonate with that, so there’s nothing I can say that’s going to change that if paranoia is an innate need within somebody. But for those who are just looking to become informed, and find themselves getting swept up in fear and paranoia as an unfortunate side effect, then just know that probably half of what you’re going to read out there is bunk and designed to get people worked up in order to play on people’s fear. Nobody can know for sure what’s going to happen in the future. The only thing you can do is get your own ducks in order, and be prepared but calm. That’s all any of us can do. No sense in freaking out and being paranoid and full of terror for things that are most likely out of our hands.
For newbies who find themselves at the beginning of their journeys, it’s all about getting informed and aware, which is a good thing and absolutely necessary, but without giving neg/dark stuff more credit than it deserves and believing it has more power than it really does. Balance, as always……………
Paths not taken
Recently a reader emailed me some links to websites and podcasts/interviews concerning accusations against UFO/abductions researcher David Jacobs. The reader thought I might be interested to hear another viewpoint on him and his work since I have some of his stuff recommended in my “Books and Websites” section. I was interested and perused the websites and listened to some of the links. And from what I was able to tell, it seems there’s definitely an issue there……though that’s not the main point of this write up. (As I told him, I’m not emotionally invested in any of these researchers even if I recommend their stuff. So if somebody turns out to be a fraud, or at least, a bit questionable in their methods, then I just nod and shrug, and if necessary, remove their links from my site and move on. No worries, no personal ego investment.) Basically some of David Jacobs’ research subjects are disgruntled with their experiences with him, meanwhile, as Jacobs has talked smack about them on his website and in interviews, causing them to formulate rebuttles on websites of their own. And this is what got my interest, more so than the idea that there could be issues with Jacobs’ questionable hypnosis methods and beliefs. It was the whole “he said she said” finger pointing back and forth accusations, rebuttles and amped up drawn out histrionic drama. That’s what stood out for me. It made it intolerable to sit through the whole podcast thing I was supposed to be listening to. (the podcast consisted of taped phone conversations between David Jacobs and one of his research subjects, as they went back and forth, on and on, arguing about stuff that ultimately doesn’t matter in the big scheme of things. It was painful to listen to all that wasted time and energy. Not my cup of tea.) But more importantly, it reminded me about everything that is completely wrong and messed up in the world of UFO/alien abduction and MILABS research. And why I chose to not pursue it and walk away.
Though let’s face it, I was a reluctant participant in the first place, as described in the “About” section on this site. But once I got going I realized I had a lot to say, and personal, firsthand experience to back up what I was talking about. There was passion and enthusiasm to put out what I knew and what I’d learned, in order to help others. (and part of “helping others” includes “amusing people with stories and anecdotes to help them pass the day at their jobs as they surf the ‘net, hopefully giving them something interesting and weird to think about.” ;D ) Though despite all that I never felt a drive to really “put myself out there.” The idea of possibly giving interviews or pursuing things to that level was unappealing. Those big name authors who get their stuff published in mainstream publishing houses and then go on tours, giving radio interviews and all that………..no thanks. Not for me. Just quietly do self publishing, offered up on the website, including a free download, and just lay low. (In the mainstream world, in this time line, I never fit in and have always pretty much been on the outside looking in, a misfit, or where things are off kilter with me, making me impossible to nail down. I don’t belong to or match with any particular group, and so far I’ve found only one other person in my entire 36 years who’s on the same wavelength and a match in all the ways that are important. So why should things be any different with the woo-woo world, right? ;) )
And as time wore on, it didn’t take me long to notice the things that author and woo-woo researcher John Keel notes in his book “Operation Trojan Horse,” reinforcing my instincts to be on the outside looking in. The rampant neurotic paranoia and fear in people who are claiming to be targets. The immature craziness of so many of the people I was crossing paths with. (I have so many stories I wouldn’t even know where to begin, but sometimes part of me wants to do a write up about some of the troublesome people I’ve encountered in the past few years, but I’ve decided not to.) Keel even says in “Operation Trojan Horse”: “The phenomenon preys upon the neurotic, the gullible and the immature.” So it’s not just me noticing this pattern. Keel also talks about how the woo-woo phenomenon is basically a life ruiner for many people. They don’t know how to handle it, they go crazy with it and let the paranoia, fear and craziness derail them. I’ve seen that too. So I was reminded all over again when trying to listen to those David Jacbos “he-said she-said” pod casts of all the things that make it very unappealing to want to get involved in that particular scene and/or to put oneself out there in any sort of “loud” capacity. (or why I’ve also been leery of the idea of seeking out mainstream researchers for “help.”) The whole scene is just nothing but trouble. And as noted in my “About,” section I used to have reservations about writing a book about MILABS and such because I’ve seen all the crazy women who tend to be involved in that scene. Back in 2006 I heard from one of the craziest women I’ve ever had the unfortunate experience of dealing with, named K___, who believed she was a MILAB, and later ran to MUFON to seek help. And of course the MUFON “therapist” person was getting her all riled up, giving her some quiz that she then used to determine that K___ was definitively, absolutely an abductee, etc. Talk about frustrating and annoying. (I’ve made it a point to never tell anybody who contacts me what they do or don’t have going on in their lives. It’s not in my place to diagnose anybody’s situation, and I’ve had to let some emailers know that I wasn’t about to do that for them after they asked me to point blank tell them what was going on with them, or what stuff meant for them. People who take it upon themselves to diagnose others while seeming to relish the hysterical reactions they generate are ego wankers on a God trip, in my opinion.) And K__ being the way she was was of course just going crazy with this diagnosis, letting it fuel an already troubled/unstable, gullible and very immature, illogical personality. Lot to say about all that, and the conclusion was that I had to end the email exchange and block her email address. (she was also trying to bother my boyfriend Tom with various nuttiness, to the point where he had to start ignoring her emails.) At the point where I had to end things she rebuttled with a hysterical threat that she “wasn’t going to recommend my book to anybody anymore!!” To which I clarified, Wait, you mean……..the book I give away for free? That book? Um. Okay. Apparently she thought that I was in this for the money (because let’s face it, pretty much everybody else is…..) and that her threat would actually affect me financially. Like I would respond with, “Oh no! Now I won’t be able to pay the rent! Please don’t do that! I’ll do whatever you want! You own me! You control me!! ahhh!”
A few years later I discovered through hits showing up on my web logs that somebody who sounded just like her showed up on the Godlike Productions crazy forum from hell ranting about me, and telling people there that I had tried to “handle” her in our exchange. As in, mind control handling. When in fact she’s the one who reached out to me, then I had to end it and block her so she couldn’t keep contacting me after it became clear something was very wrong with her. This sound-a-like on the GLP also made threats that she was going to go around on the ‘net to tell everybody about me. (“oh no! Now I won’t be able to pay the rent! Please don’t do that! I’ll do whatever you want! You own me! You control me!! ahhh!”) Which is how I pretty much knew it was her. Hysterical threats were her schtick, you could say, revealing yet again that she was on par emotionally with a small child who resorts to fits when she can’t get her way. But, that’s what you often see in the woo-woo scene. Crazy people, sometimes downright deranged as was the case with this particular woman, emotionally immature and disturbed, exactly as John Keel noted, with rampant paranoia, accusations, delusions, fighting, drama and even more paranoid delusions. People like her are what make this whole endeavor a big turn off, and why I’ve removed my email several times from my home page then caved in and put it back up.
Like I said, I have a lot of stories, namely people I’ve crossed paths with via email and messageboards, but one of them involves the way in which “stuff” attempted to get me sucked into a very public, he said-she said finger pointing accusation drama with a very large, well established group/website on the ‘net. So I’ve had my taste of it, enough to know what it’s all about. I’ve written about it here in the “Thoughts” section actually, in one of the below entries called “The Only Winning Move.” Just scroll down. What’s interesting is that the internet woo-woo metaphysical new age conspiracy group I mention in that entry (who shall remain anonymous) is STILL, to do this day, as of March 2011, talking smack about me over on their website forum. ;D And talking about my boyfriend too, since he was their first and foremost target, but definitely my name is tossed around too. (To the point where this group has gone as far as to put out fake channeling material from their famous entities that supposedly verifies their claims about us. They know that coming from them, mere humans, the flame war means nothing. But hide behind channeling from their infamous entities and that will have clout in the new age woo woo world. What’s funny though is, the male co-leader of this group showed up on my boyfriend’s message board forum back around 2006 or so, posting some of this faked channeling material that talked about us…….and where these entities referred to me as “lyra.” The handle name I used on that particular board. Whoops. I saw that and just laughed. Oh REEEEaaally! So these entities call me “lyra,” a fake name from a random message board that you guys have nothing to do with, and not Carissa, my real name? ;D Yeah, sure, this channeling is legit. I imagine there was some scrambling around behind the scenes, and soon the male leader was back, reposting the supposed channeling where my name was changed to Carissa. The sick part though is that their devoted followers believe it, and swallow it up whole with no questions asked.)
Problem for them is, I’m not biting. And with the exception of one post on her forum which I talk about in the below entry “The Only Winning Move,” I’ve refused to bite all these years. (I define “biting” as making a formal public statement where I directly name them, and take them on point by point with anything they’ve ever said or claimed about us, as well as throwing in an extra 2 cents personal assessment of who they are and what they’re doing, and what other people that I have either personally met or spoken with have said about their own interactions with this group.) Maybe on another timeline I did bite and got sucked into the nonsense, but then maybe things got changed around. You never know. Maybe in this one I got smart and didn’t get pulled down into what I call “the demon pit.” That’s the pit full of fighting and hatred that the negs want to suck everybody down into, and we’ve all probably been pulled down into it at some point or another. (I used to, a lot, until I wised up and learned how to start walking away.) I always have this image in my head of this fiery pit of hell, full of writhing, screeching negs trying to grab onto anybody within range that they can pull down into this pit. Another phrase I like to use is “rolling around in the mud with the pigs.” But when it came to this particular group I glanced down into the pit, thought, “umm….no thanks……” and kept right on walking. Not interested in the drama, the games, the endless back and forth of self righteous, indignant rebuttles in defense of the ego. The finger pointing, paranoia, accusations about who’s an agent, who’s COINTELPRO, who’s a plant, who’s a mole, who’s a psychopath, who’s a this, who’s a that, drama, negativity and more drama, fighting, energy drain and time wasting.
But that, unfortunately, is what encompasses so much of the UFO/abductions/MILABS/conspiracy research. Drama and in-fighting, groups that never manage to remain cohesive, and endless, paranoid accusations. (Even worse are the people who claim that they don’t enjoy the fighting and persecution they receive, and yet, behave as if they relish it by constantly talking about it on their websites/blogs, even going as far as to reprint entire email or Facebook exchanges. ;) Means they enjoy it a little more than they’d like to admit.) To me it’s 50 percent stupidity on the parts of the people involved, and it’s 50 percent negative interference to sabotage all efforts to try to get to the bottom of what this reality is, and who we really are in relation to that reality. Keep everybody paranoid, scared, fighting, pointing fingers, and allowing themselves to be sucked into petty dramas. The same goes for the mainstream world, where everybody’s kept distracted in a myriad of ways so they never manage to wake up to what’s really going on and what this place really is. I once received an email from somebody who used to work with UFO/conspiracy researcher Jordan Maxwell but then apparently had a falling out with him I take it, and had filmed this “hit piece” on him or something featuring testimony from Jordan’s brother that was supposed to be accusing Jordan of bad behavior. Then he started a website to put this footage up and emailed the link and info. out to a bunch of people, myself included. My response was something to the effect of, I have no idea what this is, I don’t know why I’m receiving this, I’m out of the loop, and that’s exactly how I like it. We [me and my boyfriend] live in peace in Virginia, and I’m not looking to get involved in all this drama. It’s not my concern. Then I’ve had people (that I don’t even know!) who, for whatever reason, put me on their email mailing lists, and so there I am getting cc’d on their back and forth fighting emails between them and some UFO/alien/abduction/conspiracy/woo woo group they belong to that I’ve never even heard of. I guess thinking that I would be so interested to read all this fighting and finger pointing and accusations flying back and forth of total random strangers. “Get me off your stupid mailing list” is basically my response to that. I mean seriously, who actually enjoys spending their time engaged in that? Excuse me while I go knit socks and hats for orphans or play my flute.
Over the years both me and my boyfriend have had ideas for different things we thought we might want to try out in terms of taking our writing and research further, but in the end things fizzled out. We lost interest and never pursued them or they just faded away. We both decided to just stick to writing (though he does the occasional radio interview and such) though for me the writing seems to be petering out as well. Paths not taken. In the end, for me anyway, those other paths wouldn’t have amounted to enough to make it worth the effort. (he agrees for himself as well.) Could be negative interference, as written about on this site, or it could be positive time line tinkering, going back and deciding not to go down certain routes and continuing to just lay low and remain on the outside, looking in. Ultimately I’ll never know. But for all I know there could have been unforeseen consequences of those other paths. After all, the more you put yourself out there, the more attack and negative attention you risk inviting in. I kind of have to wonder what all those synchronicities and deja vus were all about all these years, what events were being changed, what they were connecting to. Maybe it was that sort of thing. So I had this obsessive drive to write about what I know and to put together my book…..but then it’s like I ran back to the cave afterwards to go be a hermit in the hills. Not interested in all the unfortunate garbage that often times goes along with it all. Just….slipping in and out the side door, trying not to actually get involved with anybody or anything.
Stuie’s etheric protector dogs
This week on 1/21/11 I had a strange experience while sleeping, probably around 4:30 am or so. All week I’ve been having slight sleep disturbance you could say. This week I had this thing where nearly every morning at 5:30 am I would experience some startling shock to my system causing extreme stress and anxiety, seeming to be for the purpose of energy/loosh feeding, I take it. I don’t know who or what was behind it, or why this week, but, that’s one part of what’s gone on this week.
Then while sleeping in the early hours of 1/21 I woke up realizing that I was completely paralyzed……….to the point where I couldn’t even breathe. (I was lying on my stomach.) Couldn’t move a muscle or even take a breath. This was a total first in life. I’ve experienced mild forms of “paralysis”….when some neg entity was around, holding me in place. But never to where I couldn’t breathe, and felt like I was being suspended in some sort of paralyzing stasis without an obvious neg entity being in the vicinity.
My first instinct was alarm, and the desire to fight to get a breath. But then my calm, cool headed practical side kicked in, which thankfully is this side of my mind that I’ve had since I was a toddler (long story) and serves in emergency situations. It kept calm and the thought was “You have enough breath in your lungs to last a little longer, so focus on being able to move first. Once you’re able to move you’ll be able to breathe.” Prioritizing. :D In retrospect this was absolutely the best way to approach things, because no amount of fighting for air was going to be strong enough to work. I needed to fight to be able to move in general first, then the rest would happen.
So I obeyed, and began pushing back against this force that was keeping me in place, trying to move myself even the slightest bit. It was extremely uncomfortable to do this, there was just so much resistance (as well as the knowing that I’m not breathing, putting added pressure on), but I push push pushed, until FINALLY I broke through and was able to move. Then the first thing I did was take a GASP of air as I pushed myself upwards in the bed, eyes opening a little. I saw the darkness of the room, with the light from the living room coming in through the door that was opened a crack. That first moment of being able to move again felt really good.
Then I promptly went back to sleep. Also kind of strange I guess. But I wasn’t scared or worried and just went right back to sleep like it was nothing. (as mentioned in other write ups….I loves me my sleep! :D ) Also as noted elsewhere throughout my writings, I have this tendency to not take things seriously. Stuff happens – paranormal woo woo, neg attacks, you name it – and I just go back about my business nonchalantly. So this response was a bit of the norm.
Sometime after that, before my alarm went off, I had a dream with a dog in it. A medium sized, short haired dog, and when I was trying to focus in on him in the dream to figure out what kind of dog it might be I started to determine features that seemed to be sort of pit bull-ish. (but not in a bad, menacing way.) The dog was very calm, and I think my mind picked pit bull because in recent times I’ve been reading pit bull rescue stories, and I have so much sympathy/sorrow for the whole dog fighting travesty. So it was like my subconscious was trying to determine a look for the dog and started to formulate that. I don’t know. I was happy to see this dog and got down and threw my arms around him, hugging him and just holding onto him.
I don’t normally have dreams with dogs in them, only rarely, here and there, but I can pinpoint when they first started – June of 2004. At that time I had a “dream” (it wasn’t a normal dream by any means) where I was in some place that seems like it could have been the astral maybe. No determining features, just a dark gray/black color of some sort. There were three Golden Retrievers sitting in a triangular formation, each one facing outwards, looking noble and dignified. Like they were keeping a look out. A voice from an unknown source said matter-of-factly, “They’re here to protect you.” That was it. End of sequence.
Then some months later there was Judgment, from the tall guy. I was in the shower, in the middle of shaving my legs or something of all things, when suddenly I wasn’t in the shower anymore. I was in some other place/realm. So when this phenomenon came for me, it didn’t mess around. “Wherever you are at the time is wherever you are.” And in my case, I happened to be in the shower, in the middle of shaving my legs. But again, there were no determining features, but there seemed to be other people around this time, though I never saw them clearly. I could sense them around. It was like I was in a small group.
And right then this very tall guy just whoosh, rushed up on me and stood before me. He moved very quickly. No meandering or strolling about for him. I gazed up at him feeling like an innocent child in awe, like, “woooowwww….” Just open and calm and child-like. Again, he was very tall, so I had to look up at him. From my vantage point of 5’3” I would put him between 7-8 feet tall. And it was a he. His features seemed angular, though attractive (and yet oddly enough, I don’t have a clear detailed vision in my mind of what his face looked like, just a vague image) and his facial shape seemed rectangular. He didn’t smile, he was serious and all business. Things to do, and places to go. And right then, he sized me up on a soul level. He read through me in an instant, down to the core of “who I am.” Everything about me, everything I’ve ever done, all my thoughts, every intention. Probably in all lifetimes, too, I don’t know. In one instant.
It’s a…….very interesting feeling to be probed/scanned like that. I just stood there as he did this, and watched as he…..frowned. O_0 Yeah, I know I haven’t always been a stellar person, or with stellar thoughts, no doubt. But then a look of slight surprise came over his face, apparently as more information came through. The brows went from being furrowed to going upwards. Whatever it was that he was seeing/knowing wasn’t what he expected, I could tell that much. I gazed up at him, staring down at me with a “hmmm, interesting” look on his face. Then he turned, and whooshed off, gone. Onto somebody else.
My impression was that the look of surprise had to do with what was coming up. I can say that his look changed everything in terms of how I saw myself and what my goals were from that point forward. It was a lot to live up to. Though it took a few more years for me to actively pursue the change necessary to hopefully become whatever it was that caused his facial expression change. Still have a ways to go.
Then I was back in the shower once again. And that was that. I looked around, like, Wow, what in the heck was that?! ;D I didn’t forget these incidents, but I had to put them aside and not obsess over them because obviously I had no explanation for what in the frickity frack it all was….or even if was real, and not just an overactive imagination. (though really, where does somebody even come up with something like the second incident anyway. And in the middle of showering, no less.)
Flash forward to December 2004, when I came across a new Stuart Wilde article called “The First Judgment” (it was emailed out to members of his email A list only, and not available on his site) talking about….. the tall boys, and their etheric protector dogs.
“Once the tear was made, etheric beings that we call Tall Boys and Tall Girls started to filter into our 3-D world. At first they came in just a few at a time. With them came etheric dogs. I know that might sound utterly ridiculous but I can’t modify the details just so you’ll believe it. The dogs came in the thousands. They acted as protectors. There were not enough Tall Boys or Tall Girls to go around, so the dogs sat and guarded people and places. If the ghouls mounted an attack here in 3-D against a particular human, or a place, the dogs barked and the Tall Ones arrived at speed. So the dogs allowed the Tall Ones to cover and protect a greater geographical area than would have been possible without the dogs.”
And from another Stuart write up, called Tall Boys in the Dead of Night dated October, 2005:
“In the early days of the Morph we first started seeing beings arrive here on earth; I called them Tall Boys, even though the first two I ever saw were female. The men and the women stand eight to ten feet tall; they are very good looking and they can run at about forty miles an hour. We have never really discovered what exactly they do. They are forerunners of something powerful but their real function has been kept secret from us. Sometimes the Tall Boys are accompanied by dogs in an etheric form. The animals can also move at high speed. The dogs act as etheric guards watching over humans in case of trouble from transdimensionals, especially at night.”
I’d had my “they’re here to protect you” dog dream experience six months before I ever saw Stuart’s article. After my initial experience with the Golden Retriever protector dogs in formation, I had several other dreams here and there with dogs in them. In one I was just going about my dream, lalalalala, then this big gray, black and white shaggy dog popped up in the middle of the dream, all happy with its tongue hanging out, kind of like “HI!!!! HERE I AM!!!” :D This shaggy dog was the most peppy and bouncy of all the dogs I’ve experienced. The others have all been serious.
Another time I was in a dream that took place outside on a sunny afternoon, at a picnic with people, and I became aware that there was a dog laying on the ground off to the right, under a picnic table or something. He was trying to be unobtrusive. His head was resting on his paws, and he was just calmly keeping an eye on things from the sidelines. Watching, guarding. His eyes met mine, and I was like, “Oh…hi….” when I saw him. I knew instantly what he was there doing. There were a couple of other random “dogs appearing in my dreams” moments over the past few years, but I hadn’t had one in awhile until this week, on the early morning of 1/21. Only after experiencing the strange bout of total paralysis and inability to breathe, then once again, shortly after that there was yet another dog in my dreams. Protection? I don’t know. But I was happy to see him and threw my arms around him and held on, hugging him.
On the one hand maybe this is just an extreme case of “sleep apnea” (though is that how it’s supposed to work? You stop breathing, become conscious of it and awake in your mind, but can’t budge a muscle as the clock is ticking and time is running out?) However, the fact that I had one of my rare dog dreams right after (where it’s already been established that they are there to protect) makes me kind of doubt it. Who knows what’s going on, but all I know is that Stuart Wilde was apparently right when he talked about these dogs. And the tall boys. It’s all very interesting. I’ve wanted to talk about this for years, and yell out “He’s right! I’ve experienced it too, before he publicly talked about it!” but I always held off. Figured after what happened this week now could be a good time to get into it.
Time speeding up, and the sun shining whiter/brighter
I know I just did a post regarding time, specifically focused on those instances when time jumps or glitches, and/or when things are off by a day. But this one is slightly different. But as mentioned in the previous post, many people out there in the world are claiming that time is speeding up. I’ve been hearing this for several years now but held off on jumping on any bandwagons because I just didn’t have enough personal evidence to prove anything to myself either way. Seriously, how does one know that time is supposedly speeding up when we’re still existing in 24 hour days? How does that work? The clock still ticks along same as always, 60 seconds in a minute, 60 minutes in an hour, 24 hours in a day, and you can sit there and watch the clock and count along with it, so how do we know this isn’t new age nonsense? I’m leery of any of the claims that we hear from the new age circles about anything to do with this supposedly “special period in history,” least of all their claims about time. Granted, it did seem to me that the years were whizzing by faster than they used to, but again, if you can sit there and watch the clock and count along then it doesn’t make any sense, right? Right?!?
But now, I’ve changed my mind. Recently I realized when looking back on my life as a kid in the 80s, any year back then would be the equivalent of say, a year and a half now. That’s how long a year back then seemed to last as compared to today. And while I used to excuse it away with “Oh, well, you know that’s how it is when you’re an adult and work 40 hours a week……life whizzes by like that….” now I’m like, No. As a kid I was in school all day, five days a week for years on end. Then I came home and had homework. Reports to write, books to read, tests to study for. Flash forward to the present. I don’t have homework now. When I leave work every day, that’s it. I’m done for the night. I don’t have any kids. I don’t have any responsibilities outside of work. If anything I have MORE free time now then I ever did as a kid………………..and yet life is whizzing by in a way that doesn’t seem right. Again, when I look back at things in the 80s, a year really seemed to take a looooooooooong time back then, compared to how things are today. Last night when I was listening to this 80s mix CD in my car I realized when listening to a song from ’87…….“I remember ’87. I was there.” Meaning: 1987 was a YEAR. An event. It didn’t just whiz by, coming and going into obscurity before anybody even realized what happened, the way things go today. No. It was an EVENT, it was 1987! Things happened, and time seemed to really last. It counted for something. Or say it was 1986! Or 1984! Or whatever year, pick one. Conversely, what can I say about say, 2007? Nothing. I have to stop and think back on it to recall what I was doing. But it’s not just there in my mind. The year means nothing to me. Neither does 2008. Or 2009. 2010 is already 1/3 of the way over and all in all it means nothing to me either. It doesn’t mean I can’t remember what I’ve done, it just means the years fly by and no longer count for anything, whereas back then things moved slower and every year seemed like an actual event.
Again, a part of me will keep looking for rational and logical explanations for this, but I’m now mostly in agreement that something is wrong with time. Or else, the way we’re perceiving it. Recently I did a ‘net search on it and came up with an interesting website that talks about it in a way that seems to make sense. (I don’t endorse the entire article, but there is one part of it that stood out for me which I’ll get to in a moment.) Here’s what’s interesting: Before finding this article I was talking to my boyfriend Tom about the whole time thing, and specifically, how summer vacations for me as a kid REALLY lasted a while. They started about June 18th every year and went until about August 31st. So 2 1/2 months roughly. And even if I laid around doing nothing, or watching TV or playing Nintendo, which was the case for the majority of them, they just REALLY lasted longer than 2 1/2 months would nowadays. In thinking about this out loud with Tom I wondered…..alright, so how many months nowadays would equal 2 1/2 months back in the 80s?
My first tentative guess was four, but then I thought ummmm…..no, that’s a little too long. I settled on three. Not quite four, but more than three to equal 2 1/2 back then. So then I come across the link above called Why is Time Speeding Up? and this one particular part jumped out at me:
“Why do we “feel” as though time is moving faster than it used to be? The reason is what we once perceived to be a period of 24 hours now feels like only 16 hours. Our clocks still move in seconds, minutes and hours and still click over a full day in 24 hours but due to the earths increased heartbeat, we perceive it to be only two thirds as long or a perception period of merely 16 hours.”
Doing the math, that’s a net loss of 8 perceived hours a day. x 7 days in a week, x 4 weeks in a month that’s 224 hours a month. Divide by 24 and that’s the equivalent of 9.3 days lost per month. x 2 1/2 months is 23 days total. Which pretty much matches up to my estimate. I felt like you’d have to tack on almost another full month nowadays to equal what 2 1/2 months felt like back when I was a kid, and here’s an article confirming figures very close to that.
Something interesting to note about time is that when you’re doing the same things every day with very little new life experiences happening then time will appear to move quickly. Life is literally just passing you by. When new things are happening or you pack your day full of back to back stuff then it appears to move slower. I took a trip up north back in 2007, which I’ll be referencing again in a short bit for a different reason, and the total time of my trip was only about 3 days. And yet when I came home I felt like I’d been gone for a week. Things felt distorted. That was because the experience was new, I was doing something I’d never done before – driving from Virginia to Connecticut, passing through D.C., Baltimore, New Jersey and NYC. I was doing things I don’t normally do, surrounded by scenery I don’t normally see. I really packed in the new and/or unusual experiences making the most of each day and so time was condensed. I’ve spoken with others who’ve also noted the same phenomena of new experiences resulting in the illusion of time condensing. So I have to consider this as a possibility for why life seems to pass by…most of the time I’m not doing anything new.
But then again, as a kid life droned by on and on and on, the same schedule every day as I went to school and came home, school and home, repeat, and yet…..life still seemed to pass much slower than things do nowadays. Although you could look at it and say that life was still new back then, so even though the daily schedule was relatively the same, each year in general was new and different as I started a new grade that I’d never been in before, with new kids in my class(es), learning new things. So once again maybe that’s why things seemed to move slower back then. I can’t tell. Back and forth, round and round.
And not only is time apparently speeding up, but the sun isn’t the same sun we used to have either. So that’s another bummer. I first encountered mention of the sun shining whiter back on the old Goro Adachi forum I think, around 2004. At the time I was just neutral, like, hmm, interesting. It was yet another thing that I couldn’t definitively confirm so I didn’t jump to any conclusions. The only thing we have to “prove” a claim like that is our memories, and really, how do you remember differences in sunlight? Your memories will make you remember whatever you want to remember, was how I looked at it.
Flash forward to 2010. At this point I’m 110% convinced the sun is not right. Whereas I’m still only maybe 80-90% convinced that time could be speeding up, I have zero doubts about the sun being whack. Personal proof came for me back in 2007. I was visiting the town where I grew up in CT as a kid, long story there, but what’s relevant for this piece was how I was on the street I used to live on, after 8 a.m. on a bright sunny morning. There was a reason I was there at that hour – I was trying to duplicate a repeating dream scenario that I’d had for years, and I figured the best way to get it to stop once and for all was to actually be there, in the same exact scenario at the same exact time of the day. (morning time, during the time when I’d be getting ready for school and the bus was about to come.) So there I am, standing in my old street on a perfectly replicated bright sunny morning straight out of my dream………………only, the sun was wrong. It was too bright, too white. I knew how it should have looked according to my memories, which was a lot more golden, but here it was almost blinding. Just WAAAAY too white/bright/glaring. I stood there on the corner where my bus stop used to be, frowning and squinting in the glare because unfortunately things were a little off now due to the sunlight coloring and intensity. But, it was accidental confirmation for something I wasn’t even consciously looking to prove. I was there to replicate a dream scenario, but found myself instead realizing that the sun nowadays is too white and bright and glaring.
The other morning I was outside at 10 a.m. on a nice bright sunny spring morning, but the sunlight was off, as always. Very intense, and just way too white/blue in tone. Sunlight at that hour of the day used to have a more yellow/golden tone to it. Now it’s too harsh. And then yesterday I went for a walk around the neighborhood after work, taking in the beautiful late sunny afternoon in spring, with blossoming trees and birds singing and a blue sky. But once again, the sunlight was askew. It was 6:30 p.m. in late April and the sun was just too white and strong/glaring/harsh for that time of day. Should have been a lot softer and more golden. And then I have a coworker who got into a fender bender one morning due to the blinding sun. I too have experienced difficulty driving on a particular road here in town in the mornings when the rising sun is directly straight ahead, blinding out the entire road. I literally couldn’t see and crawled along at a snail’s pace. So it goes. Our new world.
I’ve done searches on the ‘net to see if I could find any info on this and it was almost like there was a black out. I couldn’t find anything. Yet I’ve heard people online noticing it, like the aforementioned Goro forum, and I’ve even chatted with a few people in the Noble Realms Sunday chat room about it one time. So I know that there are people out there noticing it. You just can’t find any formal information about it anywhere, that I’ve seen anyway. Makes you wonder. :/ Is it a black out?
Life today is different from how it was 20 years ago….but not for the reasons people typically imagine. The sun is wrong, time is off, and all of which leaves us with a white/blue lighted world that speeds by in a whirlwind while we wonder what the hell happened??? where did it go??! as one hand shields our squinting eyes from the blinding glare from above. (or as Tom joked, “Maybe it’s not even our sun anymore. Maybe it’s the bright light at the end of the tunnel because our world is dead.” O.o )
[Note: Looks like David Icke just put something out on 5/2 regarding time speeding up That’s always weird when that happens, when several websites or people decide to write about the same thing at the same time out of the blue. This has happened with me and the Beyond Within blog on a few occasions, where we both decide to write about the same things at the same time. Palehorse from Beyond Within has jokingly referred to it as something being up with “The Force.” Could be The Force, or the collective unconscious, or maybe something beaming out a message to whoever happens to pick up on it. Take your pick.]
When time is off
Not sure what else to call this, although I’ve heard it referred to as “time jumps” on the ‘net. Since that term is being used by others I’ll have to think of my own. But the phenomena involves time being off by several hours, or days. And what makes it even more interesting is when this is noticed by other people – being independently verified by others, and not just something you’re imagining.
The first time I ever personally experienced something like this was back in May of 2006. I’ll copy and paste what I wrote about it from a message board I used to post at:
“You know what was weird…………and I didn’t even initially make the connection until it was pointed out to me……….but last night before going to bed I had it in my head that today was going to be Friday. I “felt” that it was Friday, and my mental sense of time felt like that’s what it should be. Only to find out it was really going to be Thursday. I was like, ahhhhh! disappointed. I don’t normally do that either, and get my days mixed up to where I feel that it’s a certain day, only to be wrong. Then I went to bed and forgot all about it.
Until today at work…..
One of my coworkers announced that she could have SWORN today was Friday, and she felt all mixed up because it was really just Thursday.
And after she said that, the guy next to her called out “ME TOO!” all excited. And then the woman in the office near them said the same thing!!
Later in the day, my coworker said it a few more times, so mystified was she that it was only Thursday. She made a joke about “Don’t be surprised if I’m not here tomorrow…just means I slept in thinking it was Saturday!” Everybody laughed.
So yeah, it was one thing when it was just me who was a “day off” with my internal sense of time……..but it’s another thing entirely when THREE OTHER PEOPLE had the same exact phenomenon, to the same extent.
Even as I type this I keep having flashes in my mind that it’s already the weekend, and tonight is Friday night. It’s WEIRD.”
An additional interesting detail to note about this was that some people had apparently predicted that some comet or cometary fragments were going to hit the Earth on that same day, so as I noted, “And today was supposed to be “The Day” according to Comet Guy predicting the end of the world. Maybe something really did happen, then got changed. Who knows!”
After posting my experience with the day being off it then got weirder. Other people piped up with their “Me Too’s!” including people located in other countries. o_O Ten other posts verified the same thing happpening to people, on the same day. So it wasn’t just me. And that was my first introduction into this phenomena. Admittedly I didn’t give it too much thought after that because ultimately there’s no way to prove that it really does indicate anything, and life in 3rd density Earth can be very distracting. Lots of other things going on to pull one’s attention away from these subtle oddities that indicate there may be more to our reality that we realize.
Another notable occurrence – although I didn’t document when this happened, so I could kind of kick myself for that – was at my current temp job. I think it was earlier in this year, although it may have been late last year. But I was at my desk in the morning, and it was like time jumped. One minute it was sometime between 9:30 and 10 and the next……….It was lunch time, noon. It clearly felt off and wrong to me, like something had literally jumped, and I lost a couple of hours, yet things were kind of fuzzy so I just went “huh” and put it aside. And that’s a big part of the problem here, the fuzziness, feeling hazy, like maybe it’s just a case of time getting away from you because you’re too busy, versus actual “time jumping,” and/or “missing time.” Although I wasn’t busy, so it made no sense.
But then…….a coworker noted the same exact thing later in the day.
A guy that works here named Ryan (not to be confused with a former coworker named Ryan from Florida that I’ve mentioned in several of my write ups….) was stopping by to grab some water from the cooler around two in the afternoon. As he stood there waiting for his water bottle to fill up, one hand on his hip staring up at the clock on the wall with furrowed brows, he mentioned that he lost the morning. That one minute it was going on 10 or so, and the next….it was 12 p.m., and he’d lost the morning. It was a big deal to him because he had a project that was due by the end of the day and now he was behind because of this. o_O If it had just been me I would have forgotten about this incident and dismissed it as me imagining things. But having even just one other person noting exactly the same thing I experienced, verbatim, saying that the time loss seemed to occur between 9:30/10 am and noon was enough to make me look closer. I really don’t think I was imagining this, but what exactly happened I’ll never know. Was this just a localized happening? Was it on a mass level? I just really wish I’d kept track of the date. I have trouble doing that anymore. I used to diligently log everything, but eventually I just stopped caring. It’s like after awhile you go, “Okay, life and reality is weird, you’ve definitively proved it, how much more documentation do you need?” It became redundant to keep logging everything, but I realize that some things need to be, no matter what.
Another instance happened more recently. Again, didn’t log it but it was probably about two months ago. I came into work on a Tuesday and experienced momentary confusion about it being the end of the week, and that the weekend was coming up. It wasn’t a feeling of being disgruntled with work and life and hoping for the weekend, but a neutral awareness of the fact that it felt like it was the end of the week and the weekend was approaching. Then I remembered that it was in fact Tuesday, and that we’d only just had the weekend. I would have dismissed this as being a personal issue with mental confusion as well, except right then I passed by some women and one of them commented that she wished it were the weekend. So that was a minor synch on top of time confusion. Later that day my boyfriend – who doesn’t even work a standard day job and is self employed doing web design and website maintenance – said that he had also had confusion about it being the end of the week. He joked that if we’ve already done this before and somehow time got “rewound” and we’re doing it again then we should get paid double. :D I can’t say for certain that this incident was in fact something woo-woo, but it’s at least suspect.
The most recent example happened yesterday, when I thought it was Wednesday even though it was Tuesday. It was such a small bit of confusion that I was again, likely to dismiss and forget it except for two other people around me at my job also had the brief, Wednesday confusion. Nothing of importance was going on Wednesday, so there was no reason to be anticipating it. So that’s a possible suspect, although nothing compares to the first two examples!
The whole thing also kind of ties into the subject of deja vus since it’s all about time anomalies. In particular, the one so-called deja vu dated November 15, 2005 in that write up, where it was an actual time loop memory, not just a feeling of having done something before.
It’s a complicated, and yet, subjective/covert subject, so it’s near impossible to write about. There’s no way to prove any of it, and all anybody has to go on is corroberation from others matching up to what they themselves have felt/noticed/experienced. If it weren’t for the internet then that one 2006 incident when multiple people experienced the Thursday/Friday confusion would have pretty much slipped through the cracks.
Over the past few years I’ve encountered numerous new age/metaphysical material claiming that during this particular time period time was going to be “breaking down.” So for those familiar with that sort of stuff then this would be old news. The most common way I’ve heard that this will be expressed is in the feeling that “time is speeding up.” Indeed, it feels to me like time whizzes by in a way that it didn’t when I was a kid, but, I’ve always just chalked it up to being a by-product of being an “adult” in the working world, with the M-F, 8-5 job. And maybe that’s all it is. But as far as time itself “breaking down,” in whatever way that may occur, I have no idea if that’s what’s indeed happening but it does give me pause when multiple people notice time being off, or jumping, or whatever, on the same exact day, at the same exact time. It means it’s not just one individual’s overactive imagination, and there may be something to it all. o_O Anyway, just something quick I wanted to put out there. Will probably add to it/edit after I get home later……
“Remarkable Healings” – book concerning discarnate human/neg and demonic entity attachments and past life traumas, and how they impact people in their current life.
I’m currently finishing up a book that my boyfriend brought home several months ago, called Remarkable Healings – a Psychiatrist Discovers Unsuspected Roots of Mental and Physical Illness by Shakuntala Modi, M.D. Normally I wouldn’t devote an entire “Thoughts” write up to recommending one book – that’s what the “Books & Websites” section is for after all. However, this book ties into things I’ve either seen or proven for myself, as well as subjects covered all around this site; stuff I’ve been trying to say for several years now but which I don’t think is being heard by people. So it needs all the highlighted attention it can get! :D
Dr. Modi is a psychiatrist who began experimenting with past life regressions when traditional therapies weren’t working for her clients. Like others who have dabbled in past life regression, she discovered that various physical and psychological traumas people have experienced in their past incarnations often times carry over (via soul memory) into the next bodies they find themselves inhabiting. Often times these traumas become a repeating pattern in fact. People keep finding themselves getting maimed and killed in the same or similar ways, injured in the same parts of the body over and over, lifetime after lifetime. (other past life regression books have focused on the inter-relationship dramas that repeatedly play themselves out lifetime after lifetime until a person finally learns and wakes up and breaks the pattern – this book’s focus is more on the psychological and physical traumas, being that she’s an MD psychiatrist.)
That sort of thing might be old hat for some past life and hypnotherapy researchers. But where this book veers off into unusual territory is when it reveals that her patients also consistently report a slight problem with discarnate human and demonic neg entity attachments. And when I say “slight” I’m purposely using an understatement to convey humorous sarcasm. ;) No matter what their age, gender, race, religious affiliation (or lack thereof) or cultural background, her patients have repeatedly reported the same phenomena of entities attaching themselves to humans and wreaking havoc (sometimes unintentionally), sometimes even following a target around over multiple lifetimes. The patients also consistently report the same modes of operation for who these beings are, where they come from and how it all works. The book also discusses the concept of soul fragmentation – when people lose pieces of their souls due to traumas and other such things, as well as when pieces of other people’s souls attach to us for various reasons.
I would have kept reading the book even if the sole focus was on past life regressions and how our past lives affect who we are in the present, just because that’s a huge interest of mine. (and for the record, I have my own personal proof for the idea of reincarnation. As noted in the appendix section of my New Age Love and Light Fallacies article, I pretty much came out of the womb with memories and knowings, long before anybody ever told me anything.) But throw in discarnate human and neg entities and how they wreak havoc and I’m REALLY there! Only because I’m a believer that this is happening, and, it’s the reason why we have the world that we do around us. I’ve said as much in my Veils of Awakening write up, and here in the “Thoughts” section in the entry called “They Gave Us Their Minds,” as well as discussing my various experiences with non-human entities in The Vortex, Miscellaneous Stories of the Weird and Unusual and my book, ‘Chasing Phantoms,’ which is how I know that what she’s reporting has validity. The concept of soul fragmentation was brought to my attention several years ago, and I had an interesting experience mentioned in my book of what happened when I attempted to remove a potential soul fragment from a family member that I believe is attached to me. So, more confirmation for me that yet another concept presented in the book has validity.
If someone hasn’t ever seen or tangled with a neg entity then I can understand why they wouldn’t believe they exist. However until the microscope was invented nobody knew bacteria and viruses existed either. !! There were those who suspected, due to a sharp, analytical mind that paid attention and noticed patterns, but it was all just theory. So just because we can’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not actually there, having its way with us. Imagine going back in time to the 1500s and trying to explain to the population that “There’s these invisible things, called ‘bacteria’ and ‘viruses,’ you can’t see them, but they’re there!!!! They’re everywhere!!!!! They’re all around you!!!!! And they’ll make you sick!!! They get inside you and they do stuff to you! Bad stuff! You have to wash your hands! You have to cook your meat! You have to keep raw meat away from your veggies! You have to keep your outhouse away from your garden! Don’t you understand!!! THEY’RE INVISIBLE!!!!! THEY’RE EVERYWHERE!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Yeah, I’m sure that would have gone over really well. Next thing you know you’re strapped to a pole in the center of the village helping them roast marshmallows. However a few hundred years later and this is common everyday knowledge.
What’s interesting again is that Dr. Modi’s patients are coming from a wide variety of backgrounds, some of them not believing in reincarnation, or even being outright Atheist. And yet according to her, everybody keeps reporting the same thing, over and over. Apparently it doesn’t matter what they choose to believe – it is what it is, whether we believe in it or not. The earth was still round, whether peasants in the 1300s believed it or not. The Earth traveled around the Sun and not vice versa, no matter what the majority thought a thousand years ago. Bacteria still exists, even though we can’t see them.
“Remarkable Healings” contains loads of case examples from Dr. Modi’s many patients, so there’s lots of informative anecdotal stories for the reader to get the picture of what’s going on here. It’s extremely thorough, detailed, and well organized. Many times she finds herself performing what basically amounts to exorcisms on her patients, to use the quaint term. But unlike the Catholic Church’s viewpoint of banishing these things and viewing them as evil, she removes them from the patient, and then gets them to see their own light within them, which they were told didn’t exist. The ultimate goal being empathy, and getting them to move on to the Light. After they transform from a dark entity into one who realizes their own light, and before she gets them on their way to a better place, she takes that opportunity to ask them questions – find out how they came to be a part of the dark, working on behalf of the dark forces. And again, the stories and modes of operation are consistent across the board despite the patients’ wide variety of backgrounds. The way a soul became something that works for the dark stuff, going into people’s bodies and negatively influencing them usually involves a lot of trickery and deception, as it’s revealed, as well as higher up dark stuff taking advantage of souls who died in extreme states of negativity and trauma, coercing them to come and bat for the other team. It’s very insightful and sobering to read. By the end of the book I had a lot of ideas floating around in my head regarding the implications of the apparent rampant occurrence of neg entity attachments, taking it and applying it to the world we see around us. Well Dr. Modi had the same “put the pieces of the puzzle together” ideas as well, and in her “Afterthoughts” section she addresses many of these random issues. Each section of “Afterthoughts” is like a mini-essay in a way, talking about various subjects, from crimes and capital punishment, religious conflicts and wars, how we treat each other, prayers, forgiveness, and the major role that drugs and alcohol play in attracting these entities in. Especially how alcohol’s danger is marginalized in our society next to drugs, when in fact it’s apparently just as dangerous. It’s all really good food for thought.
One point that is made in the book, which I think is very important, is that religion has created a stigma surrounding this subject. That to have negative entity attachments means you’re an evil, bad person. This is not the case, she argues, and I agree with her. My take on the subject is that these entities need to be thought of as opportunistic parasites. Versus as an indicator of the supposed lack of goodness of the target they attach to. And as the book shows, apparently most of us have entity attachments of some sort, picked up over a lifetime of bad habits, mindset and various traumas. In the same way bacteria and viruses take advantage of a lowered immune system and whatever bodies happen to be around, so don’t these beings. This is very important to stress.
Stuart Wilde writes often about “the ghouls,” those negative beings who swarm around people, attaching to them, influencing them, taking them down, as well as ruling over the direction of the world and humanity as a whole. What he’s describing is exactly the same thing being discussed here, it’s just a different way of putting it. He gives tips and advise for ways to keep the ghouls away, mindsets to avoid, behaviors to not engage in if you don’t want to draw them in like a moth to a flame. Some may laugh it off as antiquated superstition, but as Dr. Modi notes several times in her book – many demons/negs have bragged to her that their greatest achievement is getting the majority of people to not believe in their existence. Because if you don’t believe in something, then you won’t do anything to stop it, right? Exactly. (Reminds me of the end of “The Usual Suspects” and Kevin Spacey’s line “The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist.”)
In my “Veils of Awakening” article as well as the “Thoughts” write up called “They Gave Us Their Minds” I talked about encountering the mindset of “hating humanity,” thinking that we as a species suck because of the seemingly never ending attrocities being committed by people in the world everyday. I stressed that I don’t advocate the victim/lack of personal responsibility mentality at all, yet….there can be no doubt, based on what my own personal experiences and research has show me, that humanity is being played like puppets on a string. That many times, negative stuff is working through people, manipulating them, if not flat out possessing them short term or long term, and getting them to behave in ways they would not have otherwise. This “hating on humanity” mindset seems to be on the increase, especially on the ‘net, where I’ve seen message board forums filled to the brim with threads detailing the latest horror story committed by people, with various posters’ angry reactions towards humanity as a whole. Which is why I want to reiterate this point in today’s “Thoughts” write up, yet again. People’s personalities and motivations may not be their own many times, as “Remarkable Healings” illustrates. The majority of people are lacking understanding about so much of what is going on here, either because they lack the ability to either “see,” or, they just haven’t had experiences with non-physical entities (positive or negative) giving them a clue to this aspect of reality. And I understand that. And that’s why I’m recommending this book. Whether you already know it to be true or are a newbie to the subject, I think people will find the book extremely informative and eye opening with much food for thought.
I want to note though that it doesn’t require the ability to “see” or even hands-on experience tangling with entities to gather evidence for their existence. Merely being observant can sometimes be enough to give indication. Watching people and the way they behave, as well as paying attention to your own behavior. Have you ever had experiences where people around you seem to experience drastic mood shifts, to where it’s like something comes over them? (or you yourself?) Where somebody behaves in a way that later befuddles them, because they “weren’t themselves”? Feeling an urge to act on an irrational thought or behavior that resulted in various consequences for all involved, and where it becomes evident after the fact that something else was toying with people, using you as the vector? (or using somebody else as the vector against you, etc.) It happens everyday, it’s just a matter of whether you stop and notice it and question it. There are so many sorts of examples, but it’s why awareness and self stalking is so important, so one can begin to take back control of the wheel. Too many people go through life in a semi-trance like daze, on autopilot, or completely distracted by the hustle bustle of the world and the media. Their lives pass them by, most of which gets forgotten. Is it any wonder people don’t notice something like the influence of unseen entities?
If you like this book or if this subject interests you, then another good one to check out would be Practical Psychic Self Defense by Robert Bruce, detailing what neg entities are, how they operate in the world as well as attaching to/possessing humans, and how to rid their influence. Also be sure to check out the series of write up from the “Beyond Within” blog called Negative Entities 101. Also just remembered that Montalk had written about this subject back in December of 2008, in his “Research Notes” section called Dislodging Negative Entity Attachments. So that’s another good source worth checking out….
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The surge of conspiratorial/mind control/gov’t experimentation/abductions material in the media
Many reading this are probably aware of the surge of conspiratorial material that has been popping up in TV shows and movies these past few years. It’s really gotten me thinking, especially since a lot of it matches bits and pieces of my own story, or other people out there in the world. I don’t own a TV myself, so I’m probably not even aware of the half of it, but I do watch some stuff on the ‘net. And one recent show that Tom and I kept begrudgingly following is JJ Abrams’ Fringe. And I say “begrudgingly” because it has a lot of flaws, and I mean a LOT (!!!) Yet, something about the plot was keeping us hanging on the line, to see where it was leading. (Updated note: The show got way better by season 2. So it’s not so “begrudgingly” anymore.) And sure enough, the plot spin hit a little close to home.
At first the premise of the show was supposed to be about the FBI tracking a group of bizarre, seemingly random yet connected bioterrorism activities termed as “The Pattern.” Somebody somewhere is conducting experiments on the human population, and the FBI is going to get to the bottom of it, often times becoming embroiled in parapsychology in order to accomplish that. Okay, so that in itself is interesting. But then towards the end of the season the spin happened. Things are not what they seem to be. There’s the bigger macrocosm “Pattern,” which is the premise of the show……along with a developing microcosm pattern for the lead characters. Special Agent Olivia Dunham begins to realize that she’s not just some ordinary chick. Oh no. As a child she was experimented on by “people in white coats” you could say. Things were done to her, she was enhanced, upgraded, along with other children, programming was instilled, which she has no conscious recollection of as an adult. But she soon discovers she has abnormal abilities and talents, giving clues to this other level of her existence, now buried. Not only that, but it turns out the other lead character, Dr. Walter Bishop, who works with her and the FBI (along with his genius level son Peter) was one of the doctors who experimented on her. Only he no longer remembers it either, because he had gone mad/had a portion of his brain removed and spent 17 years locked away in a mental institution. And that’s just the gist to give people the idea. So we have the governmental agencies, the white coats experimenting on unwitting children, mind control, the children gaining talents and enhanced abilities they wouldn’t have had otherwise, along with the idea of the bigger macrocosm experimentation on the population as a whole.
There was one episode in particular where Olivia shows up at Peter’s motel room and knocks on the door, which features the prominent room number 141. Yeah. Gotta love that one. ;)
Other episodes dealt with the physical sensation of deja vus, and specifically, how they relate to timeline divergences/parallel timelines and going back and changing things/overwriting the old timeline. Which is exactly what I’ve been able to conclude in regards to my own deja vus, and wrote about here. Gotta love that one too. ;) What’s also interesting is that for me, the focus of my own parallel timeline has been…NYC. And as the storyline of “Fringe” develops, the focus for the parallel universe, the center of all this parallel universe action is….NYC. And in “Fringe” the idea of a parallel universe involves the idea of both worlds merging, and when they do, only one can survive. This is something my brother relayed to me back in 2001 in a similar way, which I talked about in Part III of my book. As noted in my book, he said “This reality is merging with another.” Hello. He noted two things about what can happen when this occurs. Either pockets of areas go “missing,” or reality becomes unstable in those areas. In the meantime there are entire areas/regions in the alternate universe of Fringe where reality has become unstable as a result of this merging and/or destabilization of realities. Hello, again. Also mentioned this idea with specific regards to Portland, Oregon in Miscellaneous Stories of the Weird and Unusual, back in 2007 and how I was told by two people that Portland has areas of unstable reality that you don’t even want to go in as a result. (In Fringe’s alternate universe, they “quarantine” those areas.)
And for other……similar quotes, there’s this gem from Season 3, episode 4, air date October 14, 2010, said by Walter Bishop: “There are no limits. Except for those that we impose on ourselves. Open your eyes. Open, open!” (he claps vigorously after commanding “open your eyes!” The infamous ‘open your eyes’ trigger code, as noted here. ) But gee, that’s amazingly similar to my own quote, from an article that I wrote back in 2003 called “What are you going to DO with your life?!” which I finally took down from my site sometime last year: “There are no limits, except those which you impose upon yourself.” If you do a google search on that quote I’m the only source that comes up. (save for somebody who wrote some project paper in 2009 saying that verbatim, but again my write up was out there back in 2003.) When I did a google search on Walter’s near identical quote, Fringe is the only source that comes up.
And kids being experimented on by the white coats, getting mind controlled, not consciously remembering it, then growing up to have abnormal abilities and strange indicators? What can you say. ( NOTE: Tom told me that he came across something online where the creators of “Fringe” admitted to scouring the internet for inspiration for the show. My site launched in 2006 – a full two years before the show aired. So, yeah. Seems obvious somebody from the show read through my site and book and lifted a bunch of ideas to help formulate the show. :/ ) It wouldn’t be the only time that Fringe has ripped something off from some other source. Longtime watchers of the show are always spotting various elements that have been lifted from other places. Though when the sources are well known, as in movies and other shows, it’s called “paying homage,” (cough) not “copying for lack of originality.”
Then you of course have the 2005 remake of “The Manchurian Candidate,” where Vice Presidential candidate Raymond Shaw was taken, programmed, and chipped with an implant to be the first corporate owned sleeper agent to be strategically placed in the White House, serving outside interests. The movie features up close scenes of chip implantation, being triggered into mind controlled alter ego personas with trigger words, distressing mind control techniques, etc. and so on.
Another recent example is the 2009 movie “Push,” which I was just watching on YouTube, about kids who are experimented on by those governmental agencies and go on to develop super psychic abilities. (“Pushing” is the ability to exert a mental push/influence over others. That’s a very good word choice to describe how it can be.) The entire opening intro, narrated by Dakota Fanning, describes exactly what the “conspiracy” and mind control authors have been saying for years – Nazi experimentation on humans was continued long after World War II in other countries, including the U.S. and Russia, with many various purposes, including mind control, and developing paranormal abilities and psychic warriors and super soldiers. hmmmmmmm. Interesting.
There have been other movies that tackle the whole “government experimentation” idea going back many years, it’s nothing new, but it’s never been presented before as non-fiction. “Push” however, does. The narration is done as if telling the audience straight up facts about what went on post WWII with Germany, the U.S., Russia, etc.
So there’s not only an increase in the proliferation of this subject matter within mainstream entertainment, but it’s also now okay to present these ideas as if they’re non-fiction fact. Why? Well, could be several reasons. 1) To discredit those who have already been talking about this stuff for years. Now you just look like an idiot who lives in a TV/movie induced fantasy world. ;D ah well. 2) To sensitize the population towards these ideas, although to what ends, I don’t know. But the clear rise of this stuff in entertainment means something is amiss. Nothing’s done by accident in Hollyweird, in my opinion. On the one hand you have to hand it to these show/movie creators for coming up with some good plot ideas. This stuff is interesting. But, doesn’t mean there isn’t a reason behind it all.
Spinning off slightly – As far back as early childhood, books that centered on the idea of being experimented on and developing abilities as a result appealed to me. Probably for a reason. As noted in my book “Chasing Phantoms,” I already seemed to have indicators as a kid of “stuff” possibly going on under the radar in my life, of which I was consciously unaware. Yet by age 9 I was devouring up all the books I could get my hands on that had anything to do with the weird stuff. Psychic abilities, paranormal, ghosts, aliens/UFOs/abductions, Atlantis and ancient lost civilizations, you name it, I couldn’t get enough of this stuff. That’s all I wanted to read about, whether fiction or non-fiction documentary style. And since the children’s section of the library couldn’t keep up with me, by 10 years old I had to move on to the adult section. (There my mom was trying to censor me from some of Judy Blume’s books, but allowing me to check out books like “Close Encounters of the Fourth Kind,” not realizing that it’s all about aliens abducting people and doing all sorts of sex stuff to procure sperm and eggs and make hybrids. When flipping through the book in the library I was like O.o ! whoa!)
For fiction books in particular I remember Stephen King’s “Firestarter” stood out in my mind. The parents who were used in experiments back in the 60s who went on to develop psychic powers, which were then passed on to their daughter. Now the father and daughter are on the run, trying to escape the Thems who want to get a hold of them and use their abilities for negative purposes. Then there was the kid’s book, “The Girl with the Silver Eyes,” about a group of people who were again, used in experiments, and who all went on to have kids that had these weird, silver colored eyes and psychic powers. One of the girls begins piecing together the mystery and instigates a search for the others, and the kids all eventually come together. Some may say that I’ve interpreted the events of my life because of the books that I enjoyed as a kid. But I say, “What came first? The chicken or the egg?” Do I retrofit the events of my life to match the books I liked as a kid, or, did I like those books as a kid because on some level I was recognizing something about me and my own odd family? All of whom had various psychic abilities, and openly talked about it, as well as discussing aliens and abductions? As an adult, having learned more about my own dad’s military intelligence connections and his indicators of having been “tinkered with,” I don’t think I’m misinterpreting what’s gone on. At best, it’s probably a whole lot worse and weirder than I imagined, and I’ve only got one part of the story.
In the meantime, more shows and movies emerge that deal with these subjects in very open, bluntly spelled out ways, most of which I don’t even mention here because I don’t have a TV and am out of the media loop. In a way this ties into something I noted at the end of my Gangstalking…. write up, about the recent spate of articles in the – mainstream – media, designed towards debunking things like gangstalking. Why? As pointed out there, the mainstream respectable media doesn’t touch crazies with a ten foot pole. Crazies get ignored and stepped over in lieu of “real” news. So then, why are they suddenly talking about this, and lowering themselves to the level of rolling around in the mud with the supposed crazies? Hmm, is it………because maybe there is actually truth to what many people are reporting, and therefore, maybe something is feeling threatened and trying to impose damage control? Better to risk rolling around in the mud with the crazies with the hopes of deterring a few people away from that line of thought, then to not say anything at all and risk having more people waking up. They’ll end up actually encouraging many people to research the subject and succeed in pushing more people towards awareness, but, that’s the risk you take. Again, better than doing nothing at all, is the way they’re probably looking at it. Not sure if the same logic applies to the increased appearance of “government experimentation on people” subject matter in TV shows and movies, but, it’s a possibility.
So anyway, some random thoughts………
Rumor Mill News posting.
Found a link in my weblogs coming from RumorMill News these past few days, so I clicked over to see what was being written. It was a comment written by a Greg recommending my site, in response to this particular post by Rayelan I take it. I read Rayelan’s post and found myself nodding my head as I went along. It fit perfectly with my own mindset and things I’ve mentioned around my site in various places, so, thought it was worth bringing people’s attention to.
The gist is the way in which so many aspects of our mainstream world have just gotten so out of control, like with the media, and the whole divisive farcical election distraction nonsense, and the behind-the-scenes controllers getting a kick out of it all. [NOTE: I didn’t date any of these “Thoughts” entries, but this was in regards to the 2008 election.) For myself I’ve been in the mindset Rayelan was describing for years now, probably since around the time I got to Florida in 2002. By that point I’d completed my time living in the vortex, as I nicknamed it, back in California, and just finished my whole four month Portland Oregon experience with my brother, learning about the nature of reality, realizing that I’m being taken by “stuff” (who knows what they really are), and having witnessed reality doin’ things it ain’t supposed to be doin’. So, any tentative bubbles I may have still had that believed reality was what “they” were telling us it is were long since popped by the time I began living in Florida. Especially when Tom arrived on the scene and reality got even wackier between the two of us. So yeah, I could totally relate to what Rayalan was describing, being able to feel as if on top of a mountain, apart from the crowd, seeing it all for what it really is – divisive games and lies, for the amusement of other “stuff” – and just how that feels as you simultaneously navigate through your life within the mainstream world. Being….in two worlds, so to speak. :)
In particular I found her comments towards the end about tuning into the behind-the-scenes controllers and sensing how they view us to be interesting, only because they also match ideas I’ve had. Seeing us as being beneath even the rats in a maze, as she noted. The cover of my book…..puzzle pieces fit together revealing the big mystery……a maze…..which just leads to even more layers of the mystery. And how in my book I even refer to us as the rats in the maze, and “jokingly” recommend that people adopt a bit of a psychotic mindset like I have over the years because “they” will stop all the mind games with the rats who are getting a kick out of it all. Well, so I’ve learned. Then the ant colony bit she gets into. I had an experience several years ago, can’t remember the details now, whether it was a dream, or an insight, or what. I think it was a “dream,” but in it I was being told by an amused sounding, kind of disdainful narrator voice that the situation with humans in this reality is that it’s the equivalent to an “ant farm.” Basically an alien ant farm. (Name of a band from the 90s actually.) Things happen, and we don’t understand why, or what’s going on…..same situation as the ants in the ant farm should you pick it up and say, shake it around. They’d have no idea what’s going on. They couldn’t conceive of the reality that lies beyond the plexiglass……..the fact that they’re in an ant farm that “belongs” to something else. The organized society that’s really the personal property of other beings in a world so large they couldn’t fathom it. But which in itself is but a speck in the never ending fractal.
Anyway, total random “thoughts” entry. I’ll leave off with the interesting final scene from the movie ‘Men in Black.’ The final scene pans up and away from New York City, away from Earth, up outside the solar system and past the galaxy….then we see that the galaxy is actually encased in a sphere. Then an alien hand with spindly fingers reaches down to scoop up, then roll, that sphere…….which we now realize is actually a marble. Then the alien puts the marble containing our galaxy into a pouch with the other marbles containing other galaxies. I loved that. Weird and clever. Now looking back at the whole rest of the movie where the main characters had been battling it out…..to locate what turned out to be a prized marble, containing another galaxy, hanging as a bauble from a cat’s collar. Galaxies within galaxies, games within games…..
“We’re all one!”
This is inspired by an email I received today from a guy mentioning the reservations he has with the idea of “we’re all one!” It’s the same reservations I’ve heard from other metaphysically aware people, so I was thinking Hey! This could be a good thing to get into on my site! Addressing the common misunderstanding that people seem to have with this subject.
In a nutshell the main issue seems to be with the idea of having to “be one!” with people who have yucky vibes. Like, who wants to “be one” and be pals and hang with them?!? O.o
So I’ll quote my email response here:
“I think the “we’re all one!” concept gets misunderstood. For me, due to what I’ve been shown by my higher self, the way I see it is, we’re all these pinpoints of energy that have been sent out into the world by the creator source energy, which means, we all trace back to the same source. So, we all come from the same source…..buuuuuut, it doesn’t mean we’re all polarized the same way, going in the same direction, or playing with the same set of tools. And that’s where I think people tend to have a problem with the idea of “we’re all one!” They think it means you have to feel this gushing love for everybody around you no matter how icky their vibes are, and pal around with sociopaths and embrace dark stuff, cuz “we’re all one!” after all…..rigtht?! Um, no. ;) It just means that they’re an energy blob from the same source but who’ve taken a different path…..”
So “we’re all one!” doesn’t mean you need to be pals with sociopaths and willingly entangle yourself in a predator’s dark energy web, and indiscriminately feel love towards everybody out there, ie, indirectly saying that you align yourself with them. It’s about recognizing that we all ultimately trace back to the same source, despite our different paths. Some are over here, some are over there, everybody’s all over the place trying on different roles, different experiences, this light is antagonistically poking that light just to see what happens, meanwhile those two lights over there are in love, but in the end, we all apparently come from the same place.
Another way this concept is sort of skewed, or portrayed in a way that leaves it open for misunderstanding, is when people say stuff like, “When you fight with somebody you’re really fighting with yourself!” Um, well…..sort of. You’re fighting with an individualized form of energy, like the branches on a tree, or the parts of the lava lamp blob that pull away from the main blob, forming blob branches. :D So yes, you both trace back to the same Source origin. But you’re not “the same.” Each individualized energy has its own sentience and free will….and thus, the ability to go in a very different directions.
Some will arrive at the Important Higher Spiritual Truth realizations a lot sooner than others, and so if you’re one of the fast track learners (cough I apparently have not been…..) then it doesn’t mean you need to hang with the ones still rolling around in the mud. Have neutral awareness of the “bigger picture,” understand that they’re at where they’re at, do your own thing, everybody’s working at different speeds, some arrived late to the game while others are now at the finishing line, and it’s all good, because we all ultimately come from the same place. That, to me, is what “we’re all one” really means, based on what I was shown.
It’s not an easy mindset to maintain, so I don’t present all this as if to portray myself in some holier-than-thou way. Definitely not. But I have been able to do it randomly here and there over the past couple of years, and what I’ve discovered is that having that neutral awareness of the “bigger picture game” can then inadvertently lead to those oft-sought feelings of lovey oneness. Somehow realizing/remembering what the deal is here just leads to this sort of automatic sympathy and head nodding understanding. It is kind of cool, and comes in handy when dealing with neg entities, for instance. ;) I’ve gotten to a point where I just feel sorry for neg entities, whatever they are……again due to awareness. Like, awwwww….poor thing……you need a hug! haha I guess when you think about it how do you not have sympathy from something so cut off from the Source and “the good mind” and love, you know? It’s sad when you think about it, that an energy has fallen so far away as to have become almost permanently lost like that. So to be able to transform low vibe feelings of fear/anger/frustration/hate, etc. into love, via awareness, is pretty cool. Now, to be able to be like that all the time………………..must be nice. ! I think the more you do it though the easier it gets, and the more it will be able to happen, becoming self-perpetuating. But at first it might be slow going, like a rusty gear kicking in. I also have the image of an outer shell starting to crack, with light seeping through, the cracks triggering more cracks and breaks, as more light seeps through, the process speeding up, faster and faster, and easier and easier, until the whole mucky outer shell falls apart.
And for those troublemakers who can be really annoying, whatever their soul nature may be, what I’ve gotten over the years is to just have neutral understanding of the role they serve in this reality and move on. Easier said then done, I know ;) but again, do it even once and then it can happen twice. Twice leads to four times, which leads to eight, the process increasing exponentially…..
This topic is huge, just HUGE, very important, if not the most important spiritual concept out there. I mean, when I “phoned” my higher self for the first time years back I was asking about random mundane things pertaining to my life situation at the time it responded back with a visual showing how everybody here is connected, and traces back to the same Source. That’s how big a deal this is, like my higher self was saying “If there’s only one thing I’m ever able to communicate to you, then this is it! Forget anything else you’re asking about, you need to know this!!!!!!” So yeah, quite the big deal apparently…..
Hijacking our minds to create a reality that’s in something else’s best interest.
(Just found this relevant quote when re-reading “The Fire From Within” by Carlos Castaneda:
(don Juan de Matus) “Toltec seers were extraordinary men – powerful sorcerers, somber, driven men who unraveled mysteries and possessed secret knowledge that they used to influence and victimize people by fixating the awareness of their victims on whatever they chose.” […..] “I have to emphasize an important fact,” he continued, “the fact that those sorcerors knew how to fixate the awareness of their victims. […] “One of the hardest things to acknowledge is that awareness can be manipulated.” Chapter 1, “The New Seers,” page 2
This is just a quick thought I wanted to put out there [okay, after repeatedly adding on to this entry it’s apparently no longer just a “quick” thought anymore.] something I’ve already covered in various ways on this site but wanted to reiterate in a different way. But it involves the idea of those infamous Powers That Be using entertainment, especially movies, to get our minds focused on stuff that is not in our best interest….in order to serve them.
Back track: People have been kept in the dark regarding what the human mind is capable of, and we apparently have some fantastic abilities to create by thought alone. New Agers are clued into this, as they’ve been talking about “reality creation” for years now, but in my opinion the way they sometimes present it all leaves themselves wide open for ridicule by skeptics and causes the concept to be dismissed by the public at large. Now granted….many skeptics out there seem to just be bland background characters that are designed to serve the system and keep the rest of the sheep in line, making sure people don’t wake up and stray from the programmed herd. But those types aside, sometimes legitimate people who could benefit from knowing about the concept of reality creation and the power of the human mind are also dismissing the concept for various reasons, and never become aware of it. But it is real, as I’ve seen for myself and as many others have also figured out, and that takes us back to the subject of entertainment:
Entertainment in the form of movies and TV shows serves more than just the purpose of making studios money, distracting the masses, or even programming us to believe certain things. It also serves the purpose of redirecting our – reality creating – minds onto subject matter that serves the interests of the stuff that controls this reality. Or to quote an email from a friend of mine (she once gave me permission to quote anything she writes):
“I believe we co-create. I believe there are rules to this grand game we play here but only grids, not anything solid. The bottom line is that we are used in a million ways a day to perpetuate reality, as we are reality producing machines, and until we become conscious of what we are creating both in our personal lives and then in the macrocosm we are being used to manifest what “they” cannot manifest. But they are tricking us, and lying. Using rules we are not quite aware of to trap us in our own creation. […] Agenda is so clear and the targets used for this agenda, its all there if you look.”
We are being used to manifest what they cannot manifest. We are being used. By them. To serve them. So in other words…our minds are being hijacked. [Side note: Right now, as of 11/08 I’m currently reading David Icke’s latest book “The David Icke Guide to the Global Conspiracy (and how to end it)” and I just got to Chapter 3, and see that he had written pretty much the same thing I wrote here, almost word for word. !!! So, just wanted it to be known that I hadn’t read what he wrote when I wrote the above, and I wasn’t trying to copy him. He says “…being manipulated to dream a reality that someone else has constructed to control us. […] the ‘five-sense’ dream has been hijacked….” (page 59.) What’s funny is that there are several things he says in that book which match nearly verbatim thoughts that I’ve had, phrasing things the way I’ve phrased it in my own mind. Weird!]
Ever since reading her words last year this has really stuck with me in a big way and I think this needs to be shouted from the rooftops. The idea ties together with so many other things I’ve written about or mentioned on my site: How options have been removed from our reality by the forces that control things, leaving us with a limited selection for all things in our world which THEY have determined FOR us; The mind control programming and hypnotic mesmerizing of the masses by the news, media and entertainment, telling us how things are, which are usually lies, but everybody is so controlled and apathetic that they don’t bother to think for themselves or question anything; and reality creation. The way in which we can manipulate our immediate world around us by our thoughts and personal vibes, drawing to us the people and life circumstances based on what we are subconsciously “broadcasting”…whether most even realize they’re doing this or not. (And most don’t, because we’re purposely not taught this.)
So putting all these ideas together, and then taking another look at the – increasingly dark and demonic – movies and TV shows that are being created for the masses by the powers that run the world, featuring sociopathic “heroes” that the public is supposed to be rooting for and where it’s non-stop senseless murder, or rape, or torture or all around degradation, and suddenly everything goes “ding! ding! ding!”….
….The “Stuff” who run the world puts these movies and shows out there for the public to consume. And the public in turn eats them up because: 1) The reality around them is all they know from birth…they don’t know a reality where these movies and shows DON’T exist, and so they accept it by default, without question. 2) They’ve been programmed since birth via parents, school, the media, religion and higher governmental authority to not question things or think in innovative ways to create a reality and world system that would be completely different from the one we’re submerged in…..so, just accept the world they’ve been born into and pick up where their parents left off and perpetuate it on and on. And so higher “stuff” in control, who know exactly what the human mind is capable of, gets everybody’s minds focused on dark, negative, cruddy material so that we will continue to bring that forth into the world, for them, doing their dirty work…..without even realizing we’re doing it, because we don’t know any other world/reality, have no basis of comparison, nobody teaches us what the mind is truly capable of, or how it can be wielded.
Just something to keep in mind in these upcoming times when you’re choosing what movies you’re going to be watching in the theater, or rented from your local video store or on TV. Admittedly what brought this up to the forefront of my thoughts recently, and inspired me to put this out there, is the upcoming “Dark Knight” Batman sequel. I recently posted a comment on the Pseudo Occult Media blog (a good blog btw which analyzes and dissects all the mind control themes and symbols running rampant in movies, shows, music videos and ad campaigns, taking whatever I did in my own “Mind Control Themes and Programming Triggers in Movies” write up to a whole new level, times 1,000….) mentioning how I wasn’t planning to see Dark Knight because it’s just dripping in this stuff. The ad campaign blitz is in itself a huge mass programming tool, getting everybody convinced that they “should” see this movie. (so the studios will become rich from YOUR money.) Then there’s the sub issue of Heath Ledger’s untimely death, bringing even more morbid fascination with seeing this movie. And as always, there’s the dark/occult symbolisms and mind control stuff within the movie posters and ad prints and slogans, and then the very dark, sociopathic characters and plots. All of which results in one huge mind control programming trip…..in more ways than one, as outlined above. I was pondering what that does to the mind, watching 2+ hours of non-stop violence and crazy action sequences and sociopathy running rampant. And as mentioned in my Introduction to Meaningful Movies section, it all serves as one giant occult ritual in a way. Get millions of people parked in front of movie screens at the same time, (sometimes on meaningful numerological/occult dates) putting their energy (loosh….) and mind’s focus on material that somebody ELSE created, material which is usually laced with numerology, esoteric/occult and mind control symbolisms that the viewing audience is completely unaware of, and all of which means…..the public is partaking in one huge occult ritual, whether they even realize it or not.
[ Add on 7/21/08: And the same goes for books too actually. Originally when writing this I was thinking of movies, but then I remembered the huge number of murder mystery/thriller books that fill the shelves of bookstores and libraries everywhere. Last year I did a volunteer gig involving donated books for prisoners, where I was helping to sort and organize all the incoming books, as well as matching up books to the letter requests from inmates. Until then I hadn’t paid much attention to the whole murder mystery thriller fiction genre, but being that there were a bezillion of these sorts of books being donated I became fast acquainted as I sorted and organized. And all I can really say about it all is….“Wow.” Holy cow. To say that most of these books are “dark” is an understatement. Sicko might be a better word for it. I once wrote (or, ranted might be more like it) on a message board about the subject of fiction books and how most are just a colossal waste of trees, especially these dime a dozen murder mystery book series with their individual “themes” cranked out by these long standing authors that never seem to go away. (Book series with the main hero who appears in all of them are just money making schemes, a way to maximize how much of your money the publishing companies are getting. Why get your money from just one book when they can get it for 10, 15, 25….right?) In depth passages pertaining to drawn out rape and torture and gory serial killing murders…..involving kids sometimes…….what kind of person wants to actively read that sort of stuff, actually paying money for it? :S And what does it say about the authors who write it?! Most aren’t questioning this though – in fact if anything, these authors attain fame and $ fortune $ for writing that sort of material. :/ But, it’s because we live in a society that doesn’t know any better. People were born into this world and just accepted it as presented.]
To clarify though, I’m not trying to tell people what they should or shouldn’t be doing with their lives, and entertainment choices. I’m just putting my own thoughts out there for consideration. I realize how difficult it is to cut media consumption out of one’s life, (movies in particular). I’m still not all the way there yet myself when it comes to ridding movies, despite what I now know and realize. The media that they’ve created for us feels like a gravity hole or something….very hard to pull oneself out of and escape the clutches of. There’s still lingering appeal for me for some of it, and so right now I feel like I’m trying to pull pull pull myself out of that hole, an inch at a time. But I do believe that we need to stop putting our minds on the dark, negative, cruddy material that they’ve been shoving on us for decades, and start realizing what our minds are capable of….so we can redirect our hijacked minds onto material that’s in OUR best interest.
(for more on the subject of movies/media/TV, see my article, The Media )
Weather disasters
This isn’t meant to be a “gloom and doom prophesies!” post, just a neutral observation and passing on of information for consideration. But last year (2008), Tom and I were talking to an older man who, as a hobby, does this sort of channeling type of thing. It involves a form of kinesiology – not the sports medicine version, but the new age version where one seeks answers via muscle testing. Long story I suppose for those who haven’t heard of it, but this man uses muscle testing while tapping into some higher something or other to seek answers. His mainstream pursuits involve engineering and physics related endeavors, applied toward inventing things. So he’s a smart guy in my opinion, and I found it a little surprising actually that an engineering/physics guy would be into spiritual/metaphysics sorts of things. I mean, my boyfriend is….but, he’s atypical. Let’s face it, it’s not your usual combination.
So one of the things that “J”, as I’ll call him, was inquiring about had to do with these upcoming times and what might be in store. Now, as many reading this may know by now, I’m a firm believer that the future isn’t set in stone, and there are multiple probabilities for what can happen. Even a prediction/vision is just one possible outcome. So, “J” was asking about the idea of martial law, and that whole scenario where the U.S. is on some NWO lock down, with those infamous camps and boxcars and all of our rights stripped from us. You know, what any conspiracy theorist worth their weight in (paper money converted into) gold and silver would be familiar with. ;) And the answers he got back said that No, that’s not actually what’s going to happen.
What is going to happen in the U.S., according to J’s source, is an escalating series of weather/natural disasters that will ultimately wind up bankrupting the federal government. They won’t be able to keep up with the weather/climate disasters that keep piling on with all the federal aid that will be needed, and the effect it’s going to have on businesses (the economy), farms (agriculture and our food supply), and personal lives in general. And when it’s all said and done, the Federal government will have to relinquish the reigns of control to states at an individual level.
Now, I don’t know if that’s what the end result will be, take it with a grain of salt, but I just put it out there for consideration. I find it interesting though, no doubt, only because since hearing this last year there indeed have been more and more climate/weather disasters piling on in the U.S. So, I definitely believe that part is true, and we already see it happening. I mean, it’s getting to the point where the natural disasters are so big and so rampant that they’re now identified by states and years:
Texas 2002 (Catastrophic flooding, 2-3 feet of rain fell in south central Texas and San Antonio. Damages possibly up to $1 billion.)
Florida 2004 (Record spate of hurricanes hitting all over the state)
Louisiana/Mississippi 2005 (Katrina – $89 billion in damages; the economic “Aftermath” section on Wiki goes on and on, too much to get into here.)
SoCal 2007 (fires – 500,000+ acres burned)
Oregon and Washington 2007 (hurricane force winds and severe record flooding, $1.8 billion in damages in Washington, $180 million for Oregon)
Iowa 2008 (severe record flooding, Cedar Rapids under water)
Central/Northern Cal 2008 (more fires, 800,000+ total acres burned this time)
North Dakota 2009 – severe record flooding
New England 2010 severe record flooding, most notably in Rhode Island which has already been impacted with one of the nation’s highest unemployment rates and declining economy
Tennessee 2010 Severe record flooding. “More rain has fallen in Nashville in the last 24 hours than has ever been recorded in the city…”
Illinois/Iowa/Midwest 2010 Near record rainfall. “It’s a mess,” he said. “I’ve never (seen) a disaster like this. The streets and most of the neighborhood was a giant swimming pool.”
Texas 2011. – Wildfires burn over a million acres/2,390 square miles across the state because there’s been no rain
North Carolina 2011 Unprecedented number of tornadoes hit North Carolina in one weekend when “the perfect storm” converges over the south/east that should have normally hit in Tornado Alley.
‘Dixie Alley’ 2011 Storms devastate multiple communities in Mississippi, Alabama and Georgia primarily, killing hundreds, during the April 2011 historic tornado outbreak, following on the heels of the historic Ohio River Valley flooding.
And 2011 just keeps going, with the Joplin, Missouri F5 tornado (a theme this year seems to be huge tornadoes hitting major urban centers, annihilating major portions of those cities beyond repair); the Minot and Burlington, North Dakota flooding putting 4,000 homes and businesses under water (Souris River cresting at 1,561 feet above sea level, a record not seen since 1881); and the Arizona and New Mexico wildfires, burning over 800 square miles of land.
And then back in 2007 there was such a huge drought going on in the mid-Atlantic region that the state of Georgia was apparently months away from running out of water and having to desalinate ocean water. !! And then there’s the entire mid-west and central plains continuously being popped with tornadoes this year – the most ever recorded so far by June of 2008. I have my binder at home filled with news stories of all the craziness going on, in a nutshell it’s a mix of fires, torrential rainfall and flooding, tornadoes, hurricanes, droughts, blizzards, lightning storms, cold snaps, heat waves, and inverse climate, all stronger, hotter, colder, drier, wetter, and more fierce, and more frequent, than in years past, and costing everybody a whole bunch of money. Loss of lives, homes, crops, farm animals, entire cities flooded out, you name it. So yes, something indeed seems to be up, no doubt. Whether it’s the natural cycle of things, or “global warming” (whatever the source…I believe global warming has multiple sources converging together, not just the one as pushed on us by the “Inconvenient Truth” brigade…) or something else entirely remains to be seen. Something important that’s worth noting is that over at the Montalk.net site, author Montalk has noticed a correlation between HAARP activity and hurricane and earthquake activity. This HAARP correlation seems to go for all wacky weather though, not just hurricanes and earthquakes. When strange weather is brewing, sure enough, HAARP will usually be active. I think this is very important to mention. It’s almost as if certain Powers That Be are deliberately trying to make the earth fall apart with all sorts of weather disasters and natural calamities that otherwise wouldn’t be happening. So whatever the source, we’re finding ourselves in the middle of stronger climate/weather happenings than our predecessors experienced in recent times. Again, whether natural/cyclical, or otherwise.
As far as the ultimate conclusion of it all will be, with the idea of the dissolution of the federal government and them throwing their hands up in the air and giving up, I’m neutral, and/or admittedly a little skeptical, just putting that on the back burner with a wait and see attitude. My boyfriend’s theory involves the possibility that we will find ourselves increasingly beaten down from multiple angles to the point where it may open doors towards false saviors (in the form of aliens/non-human intelligences) coming in to “rescue” us. Admittedly I’m on the fence with that one too….I’ve never fully been able to believe that an outright open admittance of alien life will ever take place in this reality. Not in my life, anyway. So we’ve always disagreed with that idea, I just can’t see something in the form of the 1984 miniseries “V” ever happening. BUT, you never know. ;D The one thing my boyfriend and I do agree on is that if it were to happen – and I do believe in the possibility – then it would mean something humongous has happened and we’re past the point of no return. Where it wouldn’t matter anymore, kind of like the attitude of “Ah screw it, go for it, bring in the aliens, it doesn’t matter!” ;D But it would have to be big. And again…….that’s where timelines comes into play. Personally, I don’t like the idea of winding up on that timeline, where something so huge has to happen that we’ve reached some point of no return. No thanks!!!!
So, maybe start intending for the better timeline, and in the meantime, research what areas are not being hit like the rest, because there are places that are still pretty safe for the time being, and then get out of the danger zones if possible.
Here in Charlottesville, Virginia winter 2009-2010 was one for the record books. The total snowfall was 55 inches. On December 5th we had our first, minor snowfall of the season at 3”. Nothing big, and most people forgot about it. Then on December 18th we had our 2 foot “Snowpocolypse,” as the local indie newspaper termed it. ;D They did a really interesting article about it called Snowpocalypse: Storm of the new century and what went wrong. Even if you’re not from here it’s still probably an interesting read. My only qualm with that article is that they stick by their 20.5” total snowfall, but where I live we had 23 inches and other sources around town also confirmed 23”. So it was 23 inches as far as I’m
concerned. Most of the two footer had finally melted, save for a few “snow Matterhorns” as they’ve been called (the remnants of commercial parking lot plowing left in mountainous piles) and then we had the big rain flooding soon after, around January 24th or so. The Meadow Creek down behind our apartment, which runs into the Rivanna River, was flooded to like three times its size. I’ve only seen flooding like that in pictures. The walking trails were gone, completely under water, and nothing but tops of trail sign posts were sticking out on the opposite side of the creek bed. Down by CVS drugs the water was up to the tops of the pedestrian/bike path fencing, and to say it extended beyond its banks on both sides is putting it mildly. People were gathered around taking pics and videos (including us). Then on January 30th we received another 9 inches of snow. We still have that on the ground and then got another inch and a half or so a couple of days later (originally predicted to be 4-8”, but luckily it was all talk and no action). And then we were in for…….the Snowmageddon. 20-28” of wet, heavy snow and possible winds of 30 mph, according to the forecasts. Snowmageddon – Friday in Charlottesville ‘could get ugly’ (Equally as entertaining is the companion piece Pandesnownium – Charlottesville Shoppers Go Mad Before Storm)
It may not sound like much to those in the north or in the Rockies, but this is Virginia….not Minnesota, Illinois, Wisconsin, upstate New York, Colorado, Canada, etc. It’s not normal for here. Charlottesville according to the official data records is supposed to receive on average 14” of snow a year, and in the past 5 years that we’ve lived here we’ve never even seen that. At best we’ve had a couple of 2, 3 and 4” inch snowfalls here and there, usually two a season at most. The winter of 2006 into 2007 was a little crazy because it was so unseasonably warm. Definitely no snow that I remember, and there were bumblebees flitting around in December, with the warmth extending into January. Now this. 55”. :D I’ve never experienced snow like this in my life, even though I grew up in Massachusetts and Connecticut (I remember a bit about the Blizzard of ’78 though, but that’s the worst I’ve ever experienced and it really didn’t affect me anyway since I was only 4.) So it’s pretty novel for me.
In terms of what this particular post entry is about, it is taking its financial toll on the City and County because this region isn’t equipped to handle precipitation like this. The cost hasn’t been factored into the budget. That issue is addressed towards the end of the “Snowpocolypse” article linked above, with interviews with VDOT. Will be interesting to see if the high precipitation/unusual weather patterns trend continues for the rest of the year and how things will be next year, or if this is just a fluke year.
New add-on: Now that we’re into the summer, unusual weather has indeed continued. For starters there’s the issue of the heat. I don’t even bother to check wunderground.com anymore to see whether we broke a heat record because pretty much every day we are. It’s always “Record Report” set at Dulles Airport every time you punch in our zip code of 22901. (Dulles is in DC but that’s the biggest metropolitan region that they link us to.) And with temps getting up to 98, 99 and over 100 nearly every day it’s no surprise. I can’t remember a summer this hot in my six years of living here. Then we’ve had not one, but two “microbursts,” within three weeks. The first was June 3, 2010. The second hit three weeks to the day on June 24th, on a record heat day, of course, what else is new this summer, and was more widespread, with much more damage, than the first. (Annnnnnnd…guess what? HAARP has been active since June 13th, overlapping with not only the second, more powerful microburst that hit here, but also the crazy flooding that was going on in Brazil and China that’s taken hundreds of lives between the two, and the record rains/flooding that recently hit Oklahoma. Not saying that HAARP is definitively the culprit, but the possible pattern is interesting.) There has been some evidence indicating that a small tornado may also have been involved. Here’s a link to the wikipedia entry explaining what microbursts are. The only other microburst Cville has received according to one high up person that I was talking to was back in July 2005, which Tom and I actually witnessed interestingly enough, since we were on the downtown mall when it happened. So, three within five years, two of them happening within three weeks of each other, when previously there (supposedly…) hasn’t been any at all. These things hit suddenly, with walls of water as I heard several witnesses describe, generating intense, horizontal rain and high wind speeds. In both microbursts, trees were either completely uprooted or the upper halves were snapped off and flung about, or left dangling down, bark was stripped off (don’t know how that works….) and debris was everywhere. During the two June bursts I happened to be inside at work luckily, not outside or driving around, and the second one happened at 5:00 pm, right when everybody was supposed to be leaving. We all hung around in the building entranceways instead of leaving because it looked like a tornado was hitting outside.
I will say this: One interesting side effect of crazy weather happenings is that it brings people together. People start connecting after a situation happens. That’s something I’ve enjoyed, whether it’s the two foot snows or the microbursts or flooding. People come out and start walking around, talking to each other. Strangers pitch in to help each other. Neighbors check in with each other, see if there’s anything the other needs – you need a chainsaw? Candles or flashlights? Our upstairs neighbor offered us to come sleep in her place back during the winter in the event we lost power, since she has a gas powered stove to keep warm. And conversely, Tom was shoveling out her and our other older female neighbor, since they both live by themselves. We were also all checking on each other to make sure we had enough food since we were all trapped for a few days, unable to get to the store. Then after the 6/24 microburst we were helping a random guy we saw trying to cut a tree off of a sidewalk it was blocking. Walking around the neighborhood surveying the aftermath damage and you find other people wandering around in the middle of the streets doing the same, and soon total strangers are chatting and sharing stories and making a connection and helping each other out……when in normal circumstances they’d most likely be holed up inside in front of the television, or just keeping to themselves. That change is kind of cool. In fact, as a direct result of the 2009-2010 winter and the June microbursts some of our neighbors have started a practice of holding regular “pot luck” barbecue party things, inviting all the residents in the apartment buildings on our private road to get together and socialize, with the intention of getting to know each other better in the event of more crazy weather or if we need each other’s help. They had everybody fill out a sheet with their name and contact info. which they then photocopied and distributed to everybody at the gathering so we would all have each other’s contact info to be in touch with each other when there are power outages, or if anybody needs something during really bad weather. So far there’s been three of these gatherings. Before that, most of us didn’t even know each other. But not anymore.
Monkey See, Monkey Do….or Don’t
On a friend’s website, he has a link to an article that I found really interesting, called Children Learn by Monkey See, Monkey Do. Chimps Don’t.
Here are the relevant excerpts. Bolded words are my own emphasis:
“…..Dr. Horner and Dr. Whiten described the way they showed young chimps how to retrieve food from a box.
The box was painted black and had a door on one side and a bolt running across the top. The food was hidden in a tube behind the door. When they showed the chimpanzees how to retrieve the food, the researchers added some unnecessary steps. Before they opened the door, they pulled back the bolt and tapped the top of the box with a stick. Only after they had pushed the bolt back in place did they finally open the door and fish out the food.
Because the chimps could not see inside, they could not tell that the extra steps were unnecessary. As a result, when the chimps were given the box, two-thirds faithfully imitated the scientists to retrieve the food.
The team then used a box with transparent walls and found a strikingly different result. Those chimps could see that the scientists were wasting their time sliding the bolt and tapping the top. None followed suit. They all went straight for the door.
The researchers turned to humans. They showed the transparent box to 16 children from a Scottish nursery school. After putting a sticker in the box, they showed the children how to retrieve it. They included the unnecessary bolt pulling and box tapping.
The scientists placed the sticker back in the box and left the room, telling the children that they could do whatever they thought necessary to retrieve it.
The children could see just as easily as the chimps that it was pointless to slide open the bolt or tap on top of the box. Yet 80 percent did so anyway. “It seemed so spectacular to me,” Mr. Lyons said. “It suggested something remarkable was going on.”
The reason I found this article so fascinating is because I myself have witnessed this same behavior in adults out in the working world, most recently at a temp gig. I was being “trained” (if you want to call what I endured over that three week period to be actual “training”….) by a woman named Kathy on on how to do one particular component of my job. The gist for readers’ clarity is that it involved an Excel spreadsheet sent over by accounting that I needed to cross compare to a particular accounting report. There’s a lot more, but, that’s the gist. So Kathy is showing me how to do it all – a process that she herself was taught by another woman named Fran – and I’m watching her go through the steps, and I can see right away that there seems to be this superfluous step in the middle of it all that makes no sense, involving making a copy of that Excel spreadsheet to use as a “mark up copy”…yet as far as I can see, no actual “mark ups” need to be made.
I immediately asked about this, confused, and watched as Kathy just sat there confused too, staring at the computer screen for a bit, working this out. She couldn’t resolve the issue, so her final conclusion was to just do it anyway. Because that’s the way Fran had done it, and that’s how she had been doing it for the past two months, (even though she apparently wasn’t even sure about what she was doing….you gotta love when you’re being trained by somebody who doesn’t even fully understand the job themselves. :D ) so, now that I’m here, I should just keep doing it the way it’s always been done.
But it made no sense. It was a completely extra pointless step. I asked accounting about it, and they agreed….they had no idea why that step was in there either. Made no sense to them, and didn’t seem to be a necessary part of the process. In fact I was told the exact opposite by them…that the spreadsheet should NOT be marked up. So, I promptly discarded that step and did the process minus the superfluous nonsense for the next three months I was there, before I finally quit. And everything was fine. The world didn’t collapse. And when it came time to train my replacement, she was trained in the streamlined version of how to do things, not the mumbo jumbo I was taught.
So, I guess this means I think like a chimp. ;)
All of which goes to show the nature of the human mind. And the fact that often times, we learn via exact mimicking, and may not stop to question why we’re doing what we’re doing, or the way it’s being done. Just….mimick. Copy, repeat. Don’t ask questions. Another great anecdote that perfectly illustrates this daffy bit of the human mind is a story that I read in David Icke’s book, “I am Me, I am Free.” But it involved a woman who always cut the corners off of the meat that she roasted in the oven, and then one day her husband asked her why. Why do you do that? Because it made no sense to him in watching it all. She explained that well, that’s what her mom did. So, she does it too. Her husband suggested she ask her mom why she did this. So she calls her mom up on the phone and asks. And the answer? Because the meat didn’t fit into the pan that the mom used to have, so she always had to trim the corners to make it fit. !
The woman in question, if the story is real, never even bothered to ask all those years. She just mimicked exactly what she had seen her mother do – no questions, no thinking for herself – and in all likelihood, might have even passed that on to somebody else in turn….without ever knowing “why.”
So when I read the “Monkey See, Monkey Do” article it really got my wheels spinning about why humans are like this, and what it might mean in the bigger scheme of things. On the one hand it’s a great trait that we have, the fact that we can sit there and observe closely, then so accurately parrot what we’ve seen – it’s the way I learned how to properly knit, after all. My knitting teacher showed me the way in which she held the yarn, positioned the needles and made stitches, and I sat there completely still, absorbing it like a sponge, then mimicked her exactly. And now I can knit well. :) But such is the nature of being a primate with opposable thumbs, a bigger complex brain, and the manual dexterity that goes with it. We can do that, and it’s cool. Yet we seem to sometimes run into a wall with this ability when it comes to weeding out stuff that’s not useful or doesn’t make sense. Yet….our chimp cousins can most times immediately spot that which is useless and do away with it, no matter what they’re being told to do. Translation – they can think for themselves.
Another good example of this can be found in Dolores Cannon’s newly released book, “The Convoluted Universe, Book Three,” where she discusses her personal beginnings in the world hypnotherapy, specializing in past life regressions. Bolded words my own emphasis:
“There were no books or instructions in those days to guide a therapist, so I have had to write my own rules and develop my own techniques from the beginning. I now know that was for the better. I never had anyone telling me there was only one correct method (theirs) to do hypnosis. I never had anyone telling me you couldn’t experiment, that it had to only be done the way it had been for years. I now know they were only teaching what they had been taught by someone that had been taught by someone else, ad infinitum. They did not question the methods they had been shown, but they also had not been told they could change the rules and develop their own way, follow their own path….” – page 7
Isn’t that kind of sad that so many people just do what they’re shown to do, unable to come up with their own methods for doing things? Unable to question the way things are done? Having to be told first that it’s “okay” to be creative and come up with a new method or system?
Humans’ weakness seems to be an inability to think for ourselves many times and bowing into pressure to just do what those around us are doing in order to fit in and not rock the boat. Not always, but often enough that in my opinion, I think this has contributed to why we as a species have been so easily controlled over the eons by the “powers that be,” and why humans find it so easy to police those around them to get them to conform. “Repeat the behavior and soak up the beliefs we’re showing you, and don’t stray from the herd or challenge the way things are done, or else face dire consequences!”
So that naturally leads one to have to wonder………..were we created that way on purpose, for exactly that reason, by higher “stuff” that wanted a species that could be easily controlled and manipulated? “Okay, primates…that’s a good starting stock to use. Let’s keep this and this trait, but we’ll need to breed out that and that trait, ‘cause that’s gonna come back to bite us in the ass if we don’t….!”
Many might try to find a natural evolutionary explanation for how this trait came to be, and at one point in my life I would have bought that. But I no longer even fully believe in all aspects of the theory of Evolution. (and forget Creationism.) I think there’s a third choice that most are not told about, which is interventionism, which believes that “something else” had a hand in shaping life on Earth, and that yes, evolution is valid….but on a micro level only, not macro. It’s a whole topic in itself though, but to scratch the surface I’ll just point out how far Man has come in being able to manipulate the planet to its every whim: Weather manipulation. Genetically modified/hybrid “food.” Cloned animals and all manner of genetic experimentation and research for science and medical reasons. They’re now even talking about using laboratory manufactured sperm to impregnate women using their own genetic material. And if that last bit doesn’t generate a “holy shit!” then I don’t know what would. !! And these are the advances that the public is aware of. This isn’t even counting what goes on with the government black ops. So yes, if we at our current lowly level have been able to do these things, then imagine a species that’s several million years more advanced and what they might be able to achieve. Seeding a planet with various life forms it helped to genetically create and manipulate? No sweat.
So while I don’t profess to be some expert in anthropology, I do wonder why chimps who are so alike to us in many other ways could differ in that particular regard. Like us, chimps are social creatures, living in tribal groups with hierarchal structures, having complex relationships, possesing self awareness and feelings and displaying many MANY of the same psychological/inter-relationship behaviors that we do (in fact, it’s quite shocking when you start to study chimps and bonobos, and you begin to realize that most everything humans do is no different from them. We just have the cerebral cortex that they lack, which enabled us to do a little bit more and go a little bit further.) So why did they retain the ability to think for themselves, while we seemed to have lost it to a great deal somewhere along the way? Is that a by-product of the additional brain matter that we gained? How come we’re actually stupider than them in that regard?? !! I don’t know. But I’m highly suspicious! The Interventionism believer in me goes “hmmmmmm….” and immediately thinks of the conspiracy angle to it all. ;) And I could be way off base, so, I just put that out there as food for thought….
[And here’s a related article regarding the lengths humans will stoop to when “just following orders” and conforming with the crowd. Reeeeeeaally makes you wonder……]
( ^^ love “The Onion” voting satire vid. ;) It’s probably the best Onion vid I’ve ever seen.)
“Did you vote today?” asked the woman who sits in the next cube office over from mine. We were in the area where the printers and fax machine are. I’m just a temp and this is only my 14th day there, and we haven’t really talked much, just on a superficial work-related level. She’s a nice person though, and means well and is friendly. The answer though is No, I didn’t vote in Virginia’s presidential primary. I’m 33 and I’m not even registered to vote. On purpose. So I assessed her question and the situation – my options, and their outcomes, flashing through my mind in an instant. Lying is out of the question, I’m not going to say yes and “act” and play a game just to avoid weirdness. Not my style. But if I say no, I didn’t vote, and explain why then it’s going to drain my energy. I could already feel that sinking drain coming on at the mere thought of it, which I’ll explain why in a second.
I looked at her, the silence of hesitation hanging there, and then answered. “That’s a complicated issue. I’m not able to get into it at the moment,” with a wry smile. And left it at that. She was like, Huh….okay. ! But what can you say to that, right? And off I went, back to my cube office.
There was a time when I was all about the blunt, direct answers to “matrix” sorts of issues and probings. And I still am, to a degree. When somebody asks me whether I watched such-and-such TV show last night, I calmly explain that No, I didn’t….because I don’t own a TV. And it feels really good to say, I love it. But the voting thing is different. While people may understand that you don’t like TV (okay, you read books instead, they can grasp that, they’ve heard of bookstores, it’s not a foreign concept…) they can’t on the other hand seem to understand and accept somebody claiming that not only did they not vote, but they have no intentions of ever voting, and aren’t even registered to vote. !!
Voting is a polarizing issue, because in this country we’ve been brainwashed that we live in a free and democratic country, and so therefore everybody should vote, it’s the cornerstone of our society. We were all raised with the flag waving Ra! Ra! Ra! patriotism and the songs we sang in school – “My country ‘tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing…..” “America, America, God shed His grace on thee, and crown thy good with brotherhood from sea to shining sea” – and the myths of the founding fathers and the Revolutionary War and “the shot heard ‘round the world,” the Declaration of Independence, “Give me liberty or give me death,” the first Continental Congress….the Constitution. The ideals and the mythological legend they’ve attained is enough to make you choke up. But never mind all the Native Americans that were slaughtered and conned in order to achieve those ideals. :/ cough.
So despite the illusions of an idealistic beginning, the fact is, we don’t live in the same world as the founding fathers anymore. This country no longer runs in the way it used to, but most Americans haven’t put two and two together and figured this out. They’re not seeing what’s right under their noses, and continue to believe in a lie. There are some “conspiracy theorist” authors screaming from the rooftops about how America went bankrupt and dissolved in 1933, and turned into a corporation under British Maritime Law, and how it’s now run by very powerful groups from behind the scenes that control most everything in this world, making the President, Congress and Senate mere figureheads for illusory show basically, rigged “elections” and all….but very few people are listening. Even with what happened in 2000 they’re not seeing it. It happened two terms in a row….and it’s still “lalalalala,” oblivion. They got all excited in 2004 when John Kerry ran, not having learned anything after 2000. Electronic voting so TPTB can do whatever it wants with the votes and nobody will be the wiser. Vote count fraud. Etc. What do people think is really going on here? A true and honest democracy? Um, yeeeeaaah. :/ My boyfriend and I wonder how many votes got pilfered from Ron Paul for instance, a man who gained enormous popularity and now holds the historical record for the biggest campaign fund raiser contributions in a single 24 hour period. The same man who ‘swept’ the Virginia straw poll. Yet he has yet to win any state, including Virginia, despite all that. How do you “sweep” the straw poll…….then lose in the real vote? Seems a little fishy to me. So just because stuff says that a certain candidate won a state doesn’t mean they really did. As the 2000 “election” shows, once again.
Then there are the people rooting for Hillary, not stopping to think that if she “wins” and serves out her four year minimum, then that means there would have been either a Bush or Clinton in office non-stop for over 24 years. 32 if you count Bush Sr.‘s tenure as VP under Reagan, where many believe he was really the one helping to run the show. 32 years with the same two families of figureheads in major positions of power. If that’s a democracy, then damn. !
David Icke has been talking for years about bloodline genetics and how Presidents are SE-lected, not E-lected. If you think that any old schmoe can become President in America, think again. They may have told us that in school, but if that were the case then why have geneaologists/historical researchers discovered that over 30 U.S. Presidents can trace their genetics back to Charlemagne, and interconnect in all sorts of ways with each other. Even when the mainstream media picked up on the fact that Al Gore and George W. Bush were distant cousins did the mainstream people listen and put two and two together? No. Of course not. ;) And Obama is a distant cousin to Dick Cheney, using this fact as humorous fodder on his campaign trail, as he did during a South Carolina speech I watched on YouTube. But are people putting two and two together? No. Of course not. ;)
“ Obama has a prolific presidential lineage that features Democrats and Republicans. His distant cousins include President George W. Bush and his father, George H.W. Bush, Gerald Ford, Lyndon Johnson, Harry S. Truman and James Madison. Other Obama cousins include Vice President Dick Cheney, British Prime Minister Sir Winston Churchill and Civil War General Robert E. Lee.
His kinships are across the political spectrum,” Child said….”
And this, more recent article that appeared on Yahoo on 10/13/10:
“NEW YORK – President Barack Obama has family ties to none other than Sarah Palin, according to the genealogists at Ancestry.com, a discovery the family history site made when looking for connections between political foes.
[…]A genealogist at the Utah-based Ancestry.com, Anastasia Tyler, said Obama and Palin are 10th cousins through a common ancestor named John Smith, a pastor and early settler in 17th-century Massachusetts. Obama is related to Smith through his mother, as is Palin, Tyler said.
[…] In the recent project, genealogists looked at the trees of Obama, Palin, and Limbaugh but also a few others, including House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, and Fox News pundits Glenn Beck and Sean Hannity. They didn’t find anything much with the latter three.
But former President George W. Bush? He’s related to both Obama and Palin, the site found. Obama and Bush are 11th cousins through common ancestor Samuel Hinckley, and Bush and Palin are 10th cousins one time removed, also through Hinckley — who, and stay with us now, was John Smith’s father-in-law.
Ancestry.com has revealed in the past that Obama is related to investor Warren Buffett and actor Brad Pitt. It has also found that Palin, the former Alaska governor and Republican vice presidential candidate, is a distant cousin of both Franklin D. Roosevelt and Princess Diana….”
As an aside, I bolded the name Hinckley. As in, John Hinckley, Jr., the man who tried to assasinate Ronald Reagan, and which would have paved the way for the elder Vice President Bush to take office had the plan succeeded. This isn’t synchromysticism, it’s geneology. Interestingly enough the comments section for this article was closed after only 32 comments, right after somebody posted something about the Illuminati, and then this:
“People need to do some research, they would be VERY surprised to learn how many of ALL these presidents are related. To learn the truth, that ALL of the presidents are related, except for about approximately 5%, in some form or another and closer than you think. Just google, presidents that are related or related google. And people wonder why politics goes round and round, from both parties, they have been scamming you, for decades.”
After that, things went on lockdown mode. Typically Yahoo’s comments sections can go on indefinitely for thousands of posts (I’ve seen ones that had over 14,000 comments, and going strong. o_O ) Interesting.
It’s all about the bloodlines, apparently. The Powers That Be rig who gets to be the final contestants in the race, based on bloodlines and secret society ties, then offer them up on a figurative platter for the public to “vote” on. hmmm. That doesn’t really sound like democracy to me. But maybe I’m missing something.
But all this is why I didn’t bother getting into it with my co-worker today. There’s nothing you can say to somebody who directly asks you, as if being a nagging teacher, “Did you vote today?” Or the woman who came knocking on my door this past Saturday stumping for Obama. I politely explained that I wasn’t dressed yet and was in the middle of stuff so I wouldn’t be able to talk to her. “Okay,” she agreed cheerfully, turning to go. Then a flash of sternness crossed her face as she looked back over her shoulder at me……….“Just want to make sure you’re voting.”
I just gave a polite half smile and closed the door. Yeah, I’ll get right on that.
If they’re voting and nagging others about it, then they’re not going to be open to hearing whatever I could possibly tell them. They had access to all the same material I did, so, if they’re knocking door to door, then forget it. Their time has come and gone. Don’t bother. Pick your battles wisely. Conserve your energy. At one point I probably would have said something, but lately I’ve been noticing that it’s pointless for me, personally, to talk to people because they won’t/don’t listen anyway. It’s something I wrote about for this Thoughts section a few days ago, but then deleted, talking about the strange communication issues that seem to be on the increase in my reality as the years go on. Nobody listens, they ask me a question and I start to answer but they’re not really interested in hearing a response…..their attention wanders, they look off and away, they’ll cut me off after only a few words, or turn and start talking to the person next to them as if they didn’t just ask me a question. !! So you learn………….keep your mouth shut. Don’t give real answers, just nod or keep your responses to one or two words. Because there’s no point. Maybe that sounds cynical and defeatist or like negative programming, but for me it’s matter-of-fact, said with neutral understanding due to what first hand experience has showed me over and over and over these past few years. Something odd is going on with people, they don’t interact in a real way anymore most times, and I don’t have a solid explanation for what’s going on there. But that’s a whole side topic. It relates here in the sense that again, it’s the reason I no longer will give those blunt and open responses should somebody ask me if I voted. Not worth my time and energy. Not my job to teach them. You can’t forcibly “teach” anybody anyway, they have to come to the information on their own.
For the record though, if I were to vote and bought into the illusion and believed things worked the way they tell us, then I’d maybe, probably, cast a vote for Ron Paul. (When I’ve taken those quizzes to determine what political party you’re best matched up to, it always comes out as Libertarian, which Ron Paul actually used to be. So it makes sense that I’d gravitate to what he’s saying.) And an add-on update as of January 2012: I still agree, and if I had to, HAD to vote for somebody, no choice, then hands down it would be Ron Paul. But I do realize even Ron Paul can’t save the sinking ship that is the U.S., however good his ideas and intentions are surrounding the Federal Reserve and fiat money, the IRS, big government spending, getting out of Iraq, and all the rest. He seems like a sincere guy, and the way he conducts himself in interviews and campaign debates, answering questions methodically in a direct and honest manner instead of deflecting and distracting is a breath of fresh air. (And an add-on, again, as of January 2012 – considering his age he’s amazing sharp and on the ball. Very quick, and still very direct and straightforward in all his answers. No beating around the bush, no red herring diversions.) But I disagree with people who feel that he could be even a stepping stone to change. We don’t need stepping stones, and it wouldn’t work anyway. Our entire societal system is flawed from the inside out in every way it possibly can be, with every way that every single thing is done, and to fix it requires throwing it all out completely and starting over from scratch. That’s how crazy and messed up it all is. You don’t fix the Titanic with spackle putty. But still, I’d root for Ron Paul any day than Hillary the mad cackler robotoid faker or Barack “Say everything that people want to hear/Grandiose Empty Promise Rhetoric” Obama or McCain, Huckabee, Romney and all the rest. The other candidates creep me out, none of them are genuine. It’s all fake smiles and rhetoric to get the crowds fired up. People don’t see it though, they fall for it and get swept up in it. It’s astounding! Many people seem to lack smarts when it comes to spotting deceit for some reason, and it’s why so many people get taken for rides by con artists, scammers and charming sociopaths. Many are in a childlike state of trusting naivete, lacking intuition and unable to read body language, vocal inflection and unable to analyze word choices very well. Not sure why this is, could be a number of reasons, but yet it is. And it’s the reason the powers that be have been able to take root in this world. The naive childlike trusting population, ruled over by cunning manipulative socipaths. Why haven’t people wised up?
There’s also the minor related metaphysical issues that tie into the idea of voting. What personal ramifications, if any, might there be in casting a vote and supporting a candidate who has participated in questionable policies involving war and killing of innocents, (in the name of “freedom” and “democracy” of course)? Ron Paul for instance supposedly backed the invasion of Afghanistan after 9/11 that amounted in absolutely nothing but the killing of many innocents. Where is Osama bin Laden, by the way? shhhhh. Let’s not think about that. Nothing to see here people, move it along! So, that’s a concept I’ve wondered about. When you cast a vote for a candidate who’s condoned illegal invasions into other countries that resulted in senseless deaths, what are you saying on a soul level about yourself?
Then there’s the matter of jury duty. Being registered to vote means you’re now in the jury duty pool, and while the whole “trial by your peers” seems like a fantastic thing to many, a “democratic process” they’re proud to be a part of, I however come from a very different school of thought. I don’t want any part of judging or sentencing anybody for something they did. It’s not in my place or business to be involved in such a thing. Or yours either. But we as a society have been brainwashed to believe we should be policing each other and gettin’ all up in each other’s business….judging people, condemning them, meting out punishments. I will die going to my grave never having had to be a part of sentencing somebody to the death penalty….somebody who very well may be innocent. It’s not going to be hanging over my head, thank you very much. I’ve already gotten myself involved with enough bad junk in my life, don’t need one more thing dragging me down. The whole judgment/rules/laws thing is a HUGE topic in itself, one I wrote about more in depth on a message board forum I used to post at, so I won’t get into it all here.
Anyway, just some thoughts about the subject of “voting on the Titanic” on this cold evening with freezing rain in February…..
The Holidays
It’s December, and “Holiday Madness” has descended upon society. (technically it descended back in October even before Halloween, when I saw that Michael’s [arts and crafts store] had a “Christmas countdown” display going, ticking off how many days, hours and minutes til December 25th.) [Add on note as of January 2012: In 2011 our local K-Mart put up their Christmas display, complete with fake trees, back in September. It was the earliest I’ve ever seen in any store in my life. And back in July, somebody in the organization I work for received a Christmas catalog in the mail. Unbelievable.] I myself don’t celebrate Christmas or any of the holidays, but it helps that I don’t have any family to contend with. Family is a huge avenue for sucking people into habits they might otherwise not engage in. It’s just my boyfriend and I, and he’s not into the whole holiday schpiel either, so, we’re matched in that regard. But even if I did have family in my life, I wouldn’t be into it because when you’re awakening it’s hard to participate in what amounts to a mass dreamland delusion. Many awakening/aware people see the consumeristic madness that has become Christmas….but still engage in it anyway, again, out of family obligation or societal expectation, and various other reasons.
So getting to the point, what I’m putting out there is a call to revolt against it. Not in an angry Grinch way, but out of common sense, and the idea of taking back our minds. Yup…our minds. They’ve been stolen from most people over a lifetime of media and societal brainwashing and programming. So much of what people do in their every day lives, the thoughts they have, the whole way in which they view the world, is because they’ve been programmed to do and think in those ways. They don’t even know why they do what they do….they just do it. It’s December, time to buy up a bunch of cards and send them out to people!! Why? Because they’ve been programmed that “this is what you do.” Nevermind that it really is pretty pointless, and is a waste of trees. It’s December, time to go around repeating memes about “how many shopping days left til Christmas.” Why? Because they’ve been programmed that “this is what you do.” You spend all the free money you have left on buying meaningless “stuff” that will just eventually wind up in a landfill. It’s December, time to start singing all the same holiday songs that everybody has sung for the last 100 years. Why? Because they’ve been programmed that “this is what we do” during the winter holidays. You sing the same playlist of songs, over and over and over, and you play them in every store repeatedly, use them as the hold music on the phone and take over half the radio dial with them. Nevermind that it’s old and tired and played out.
There’s also the matter of Thanksgiving, where people still feel the need to gorge themselves sick on huge meals all because they’ve been told we’re “supposed” to do this in order to celebrate the story of the Pilgrims and the first Thanksgiving…from 400 years ago. A story they would soon realize is not true in the way that we’ve been taught, if they took the time to do the research. So, gorge yourself sick on pounds and pounds of food……in tribute to a fairytale. :/ Sure, that makes a lot of sense. I won’t even get into Valentine’s Day, “a holiday invented by greeting card companies” as Joel says in “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind,” ;) or Easter, originally a pagan fertility holiday, hijacked by The Church way back when to be about Jesus, and which is now just about candy. Same as the whitewashed celebration of the dead, aka, Halloween.
Society is stuck in a stale repeating loop rut, in so many ways, and the holidays are just one example of it all. I’ve mentioned my peeves with the repetitious ritualistic nature of the holidays in a previous entry of this “Thoughts” section, but it can’t be emphasized enough. Much of society has become non-thinking meme-spouters who just do what they’ve been told to do, because “that’s the way it’s always been done.” But see, actually, it hasn’t always been done this way. The dreamland that rich Western society has sunk into over the past 100 years with the holidays, entertainment, consumerism, and everything in general is a bit frightening, and I’m wondering when, if ever, everybody is going to snap out of it. !
The money that people waste every year on buying up a bunch of “stuff” to give to everybody they know could be routed instead to more meaningful and constructive avenues, to organizations and causes out there who would use that money to chip away at making this a better world to live in…..I mean, if one is going to insist on spending hundreds or even thousands of dollars of their hard earned money every December. But again, things tie back into that “winter wonderland dreamworld” thing that most of society is stuck in. People would rather do the dreamworld, because it’s more fun, and it’s what they’ve been programmed to do. Christmas is this fun escapist fantasy scenario with trees and lights and snow and striped candy canes and Santa and little elves and brightly colored gifts and velvet bows and stars and wreaths and jingly bells and shiny metallic ornaments and all the decorations you see on people’s front lawns and in their homes. Red white and green, peppermint and cinnamon and pine. And somewhere in there I think Jesus is thrown in too, I don’t know. ;) You have yet another hijacked pagan festival, this time about the solstice and the birth of the sun as the days once again begin to get longer and longer, turned into the birthday of this guy named Jesus, turned into mass materialism blitz designed to make heads of corporations rich. :/ And put the average person in debt for the next five months afterwards. So in a world full of boring same old, same old, day in and day out, Christmas is a welcome reprieve from the daily drudgery, certainly more fun than giving money away to causes and organizations and the poor and forgotten. The whole child-like mindset of choosing short term self-gratification, fun and entertainment over long term benefits to the planet. And we’ll get back to that bit about the drudgery in a short bit.
I don’t know what, if anything, could even be done about those stores that are already putting up Christmas displays in October, or the mass bombardment of Christmas music in public, and the brainwashing blitz that society as a whole is subjected to, short of throwing out the TV, turning off the radio, not reading the paper and limiting one’s involvement with mainstream society. (all of which I’ve done, for other reasons, but which especially comes in handy during “the holidays.”) Maybe if people stopped participating then stores and corporations would have no choice but to stop. Not sure if that could happen though, as there seems to be a lot of pod people out there. But part of the revolution I’d love to see is not just people pulling back their energy and involvement in corporation-fueled holidays, but spreading the message to others….when asked or approached about it. (Standing on the street corner bellowing about it all, while certainly one way to be heard, will most likely just put people off. The same goes for unsolicited input, which often times just makes people defensive and unreceptive.) But when you’re asked or approached with stuff like “Have you got all your Christmas shopping done?” then by all means, it’s your time to give an honest response. Since they asked and all. “No, I haven’t, because I don’t participate in the corporate-fueled mind control called “Christmas.” I save my money and put it to better use, such as donating to such-and-such charity, or helping society out in this-and-that way.”
For some that may be too blunt and rough around the edges for their liking ;) not an approach they’d feel comfortable using, and that’s fine…taylor it to whatever works for you. But the key is to speak up and say something when asked and approached. Plant those seeds. In retrospect I wish I’d done more of that over the past ten years instead of just clamming up when asked about how much shopping I’d gotten done, or where I was going for Christmas, etc., the asker just taking it for granted that I do celebrate Christmas, and in the same exact ways they do. Which is a bit irritating, but, I digress.
This reality has been put into place by other “stuff,” both human and non-human in my opinion, and is not representative of the way things should ideally be, but most people just go along with it all and do what they’re told we’re “supposed” to be doing, without question. No matter what the cost to the environment, their bank accounts, their personal energy, health, and so on. This goes for holidays and many other aspects of our every day lives. But with holidays, every year it’s like a hamster wheel and the speed is slowly being turned up, faster and faster, it starts earlier and earlier and the media blitz mania is amped up higher and higher. Time to jump off and walk away! But it doesn’t mean I’m against all celebrations of sorts – celebrations are a good thing. But not the corporate-driven ones bombarding the public with an advertising and brainwashing blitz to convince people to dance like puppets and throw away their hard earned money on useless junk, cards and candy. That’s what I call going through the motions of ritualistic holiday participation – dancing like a puppet. Somebody who’s doing what others have dictated instead of carving their own path.
Which is a point that I’ll leave off with – the idea of having our own celebrations, apart from the mainstream herd and their meaningless corporate holidays. Questioning the so-called “holidays” we’re told to celebrate, which are most times quite ridiculous, and inventing our own ones that actually have real meaning. Or better yet, treating every day like a cause to celebrate. :) Stuff in charge doesn’t like that though. They want only intermittent “dream mentality” holidays revolving around consumerism to give the rats in the maze something to look forward to here and there while they slave away their lives. Slave away for several months in the drudgery…but you have Fourth of July to look forward to. Slave a way a few more months. Now we have Halloween. Slave away another month, now we have “gorge ourselves on 150 pounds of food” day. Slave away for another month, now we have Santa and Presents. Slave away for two more months, oh look, now we have Box of Chocolates and a Rose Day. yay. (‘cause nothing says “i love you” more than buying what corporations tell you to buy for your significant other on a specific designated day…..) But the hypothetical idea of living a life where one celebrates every day with meaning also means not settling for a life where one has to toil away to serve the controllers, with only those intermittent breaks in the drudgery to look forward to. Kind of a slippery slope……….!
Trying to make a living, and sometimes scamming people, via spirituality
Recently I’ve begun reading the Mary Summer Rain books, and just finished “Phoenix Rising – No-Eyes’ Vision of the Changes to Come.” It’s an interesting book, talking about the various prophesies for this particular time period and beyond, (supposedly) given to Mary by her Chippewa shaman teacher and friend, No-Eyes. What I’d like to focus on here is something that was buried at the end of “Phoenix Rising,” not even pertaining to prophesies and predictions. It’s commentary that I very much agree with, and have been noticing for myself with frowning furrowed brows. But I’ll let the excerpt do the talking (bolded words my own emphasis):
“My readers have sent me all manner of pamphlets, newsletters, advertisements, and magazines produced by these various enlightenment organizations. What I adamantly object to is that most of these organizations, whether non-profit or not, have the bold audacity to claim enlightenment on the one hand, while placing something as _un_-spiritual as a common “price tag” on what they have to offer the sincere seeker in the other hand. The two are diametrically in opposition. And this widespread practice appalls me. It speaks of self-serving intentions, of personal gain at the hands of innocent seekers of light.
“The fact that there are teachers of spiritual truths and/or teachers of innovative environmental living who are actually “charging” exorbitant admissions, fees, and/or due for seminars symposiums, courses and the like is in direct opposition to the very basic premise of spirituality! To create a common “commodity” or “purchased product” out of enlightenment is to vulgarize the total concept of spirituality! True and pure spirituality has been taken out of the “sharing” of enlightenment to transform it into what is now disgustingly seen as the “selling” of enlightenment.
“What this converts to is a stomach-turning statement that goes exactly like this: “Unless you come up with the money, you don’t get spiritual enlightenment.”
“….It is too important to veer off your spirit’s path only to end up listening to lectures, seminars, courses, or symposiums that require your money to maintain its very existence….
“…Perhaps when this ugly subject of “paying” for enlightenment, simple guidance and/or or help really hit home with me was when an elderly Hopi wiseman appeared unexpectedly upon my doorstep. At the time I wasn’t home, but when he later called, what he asked me plunged my heart to the ground. He softly said, “How much do you charge for a consultation appointment?”
“I was so taken aback by the shocking question that I was entirely speechless for a few seconds. “Why, nothing!” I said.
“The man on the phone chuckled lightly under his breath. “Well, you know how much everything costs in the white man’s world,” he added.
“I sighed. “Yes, I know, but I don’t walk that path.” My heart was sad at this realization. “This isn’t the same trail,” I answered. “This isn’t the same one at all.”
“When I’d hung up, the full impact of his question struck hard. I considered what he had said about the “cost” of just talking and it literally sickened me. As knowledgeable as No-Eyes was, as profoundly wise and intensely powerful as her lessons were, she was the epitome of humility and compassion. How can others, who haven’t a modicum of her wisdom and timeless vision, have the bold audacity to “charge” others for their personal guidance?”
When reading this particular section I really found myself nodding my head as I went along. Over the past several years I’ve watched on the sidelines as the New Age movement has capitalized on people who are waking up and seeking answers, and it’s gotten me a little annoyed. You see the advertisements in the local and national publications geared towards spirituality and alternative subjects for the “spiritual guru” types – some even wearing white robes and such, smiling serenely as they pose for these advertisement photos – announcing their classes and symposium talks…..all for mega bucks though. ;) Of course. In fact I received an email months ago from a female around my age, (early 30s) who it turns out lives in the same town as me, telling me about some dude she’d seen advertised in our local metaphysical newspaper. He was giving a 2012 speech/class sort of thing, and she wanted to go. But it had a costly price tag. Of course. I on the other hand have no desire to go within 50 feet of any of those guru wannabes, pretending that they hold the answers for us and all you have to do is cough up several days’ pay to get those answers. It’s bullshit. Plain and simple. Many of these gurus are looking for power and an ego wank. They like having a group of people gathered around them, hanging on their every world, making them feel special and wise. And it’s high time people woke up to this.
Here’s something obnoxious that I’ve witnessed – there was a new age woman who was giving a talk here in town, with an ad for it. And at the end of the ad she stated that that there was never a cost for the service she provided…however, there was a $180 “abundance exchange.” I read that and didn’t know whether to laugh at her or go “AHHHHHHHH!” and bang my head against the nearest wall. An “abundance exchange” ?? Does the word euphemism mean anything to her? There isn’t a charge…but yet there is! We’ll just call it something different, using a goofy new age term for it! Then people won’t mind!
And here’s something that a personal aquaintence sent me today (10/8/10) which she gave me permission to post (I’ll do it anonymously) and which I think is a great summary of this issue. Bolded words are my own emphasis. I’ve also “vagued out” (for lack of a better term) some of the direct references she makes to people and names of books/courses and such, for obvious reasons:
“Well, first, this is just my rant and I know you agree with me on this. It just pisses me off that you have all these people that claim that they know what’s going on here, and they take you to a certain point with their info…and then you get…“and for just the low, low price of $300 a month, I will give you the ultimate secret!” Yes, yes, I know…discernment, discernment…nobody is going to know it all…no one has is all figured out. Im not looking for that…but if you have information you might think is valid, then just put it ALL out there stop these stupid games!! You and Tom were able to put valuable info out there without having to rape people’s wallets!
Case in point…. L_____ just put out “______” So I bought it ($30 for a paperback, what was I thinking!) okay, let’s see what she has to say now. It’s all the same stuff that’s on the website (part 1) except she threw in a couple updates […] So in other words, “you’ll have to buy my other book if you want more info”. […] I checked out how much her “cheap” video is…$54 US dollars!
M____ dropped his website…and if you want “in” on the “special stuff”, you only have to cough up $2000 to join his new website! Project Camelot did an interview with this woman, A______ She had some really interesting stuff, not info I’d seen anywhere else. But towards the end of her interview you find out, if you want to be safe in the upcoming planet changes, you need to take her $300 seminars. WTF? If you are so concerned about humanity and you want to make sure they have this info (whether it’s really valid or not) why are you limiting it to only the people who have the cash???? It almost discredits their message with me right away! Okay there’s my rant! :D “
In a follow up email she went on to say:
“Around 1985, my cousin’s mother-in-law gave me a book by P___T_____ about the E_____. I got really excited because it was new info and was giving me an inkling of what might have been going on. I wanted to read more and this woman, Karen, told me I should sign up with E____ for their discourses. Well it was $20 a yr., and back then that was a lot of money, especially for someone with 2 kids that was barely ekeing out a living. But I sucked it up and did it. Now you had to go through initiations which you were told the first 2 took place on the “inner“during meditation. The third initiation took place on both the inner and outer, you had to have a fifth initiatie (a Madhi) give you the outer intitation, which I dutifully did. They were always having “conferences” (I cant remembered what they were called, but something ot that effect), which I obviously I couldnt fly off to because of finances. They said you needed to get the “darshan” (gaze…but who knows, it could of been the evil stink eye for all I know) from the living E___ Master. I kind of started feeling real creepy about that. They also wanted you to participate in local “satsang” classes and such, but I dont like belonging to groups or participating in that kind of thing so I never went. They also told you that if you divulged any of the discourse material to anyone except family members, you would lose any spiritual progress you gained. In fact when I recieved my “pink slip” for my third intiation, on the back of my pink slip said that if you divulge any of the info, OR step off the path of E__, well….you are in deep doo-doo and all hell will break loose! Well, something like that is a BIG dare for me. That’s when it clicked in. This is BULLSHIT! I took the biggest jump I could off that path.
But see, back then it was the same story. Give me your money, we’ll give you the secrets of the universe, but it’s going to take lots of your money, because we’re going to keep dragging this out and keep putting out “new” info that you can only get if you keep paying your money.
I am SO DONE with all these people. If you are so concerned about humanity waking up and smelling the coffee, then give them the darn information!! Get a friggin normal job like everybody else, recruit some volunteers to help you get all your important facts out there if you are so concerned and loving!!!! Need I say more?”
I think that just about sums it up! As her email aptly illustrates, for these types it’s not about the metaphysics/spirituality. It’s strictly a business, a way to get as much money from people as possible and nothing more. This may sound harsh but by this point I feel that anybody who’s charging money like that for books, courses and whatnot, especially the types that lead people along and then request money to continue, is a fraud, period, and should be avoided at all costs. It’s not about you, it’s about them, and their bank account. These types really need to get a job already.
There’s sincere spirituality, and then there’s the con artistry that takes advantage of newbies and seekers. And to the latter I want to say…..“It’s called a day job. Get one.” Everything about the way the new age con artists operate is hypocritical, and all around contradictory to whatever image they’re trying to project. It all traces back to sociopaths/psychopaths (or maybe just “immature souls” I don’t know.) Self serving, hypocritical, money grubbing, lying to people’s faces, manipulating, playing games, with zero remorse, no shame, no guilt. They do it without blinking an eye, or missing a beat, and they certainly don’t lose any sleep at night over what they do. Sociopathic all the way. Same as the politicians on the front stage. Same as the corporations, banks and media owners. Same as the leaders of many churches, especially the big corporate-y ones with large congregations and their own TV show. Same as most everything going on in this world. It’s all one and the same. Oil separating from water. Two types of people. One who takes advantage and/or controls and rules everybody else. If only people would wake up to it. Unfortunately so many followers of these people and groups get hoodwinked and will passionately defend what their gurus do, being their biggest cheerleaders, finding 1001 excuses to explain away their methods and behavior. They need a group to belong to, they need an ideology to follow, they don’t want to see things for what they are because then they risk being back out in the big bad scary world, alone, with no group, no leader, and no teachings that promise them the ultimate secrets of life. And for many they don’t want to admit they were wrong, or that they were duped. Many feel that you can only keep pressing forward in such a situation, keep on the rose colored glasses and pretend everything is okay because otherwise it was all for nothing.
Just because something is wrapped in “spirituality” or has the “new age wrapping” around it doesn’t mean it’s sincere or that the people involved are honest. There are just as many sociopathic con artists operating within religion and spirituality as there are in any other area. Maybe more so, because spirituality and religion give them a great costume and mask to hide behind.
There’s a reason I give my book away as a free PDF, donation-only…because that’s the way it should ideally be, in my opinion. People who can benefit from it won’t be denied it because of “money,” and meanwhile, I work a day job (which often times affords me the opportunity to work on my website and writings while at work) and my cost of living is taken care of. Life is good. Everybody wins. I’m not running around out there always trying to hustle people for their money, which means I can sleep well at night.
Is Mass Consciousness Really “Waking Up” ?
On several message board forums over the past couple of years I’ve seen some optimistic and enthusiastic posts from people, usually coming from a new age perspective, declaring that “mass consciousness is awakening!” That more and more people are waking up en masse, and soon the gig will be up for the neg controllers of Planet Earth as humanity as a whole rises up and takes it all back. Or even “ascends,” for those who believe in that sort of thing. These people claim that people all around them are waking up to the game.
I remember sitting there in front of my computer reading these various optimistic declarations, looking around (figuratively speaking) and thinking “Really?………uh………where?” Seriously, where are all these mass wakening people, ‘cause I’d love to meet them. !
So I’d post back a response that I didn’t mean to burst anybody’s bubble, but honestly, I am NOT seeing this supposed mass awakening taking place. If anything, the few people who are “waking up” are really waking up, while the rest seem to be falling further asleep at the wheel. In fact recently we were watching a video of a four hour speech presentation given by Dr. William Deagle regarding the situation on Earth right now, everything from the “NWO” to the coming cataclysms, both manufactured and real, aliens, and who’s really running the show, and at one point in his speech he even iterates that the mass consciousness on Earth as a whole is getting lower, NOT higher as many would like to believe – in fact, it’s lower than it has ever been. He stated that there are those being born in this time period that are like the bubbles rising to the top of the champagne bottle, but overall, mass consciousness is in pretty sad shape, for a variety of reasons, not least of all because The Powers That Be have done many things to try to keep the herd squelched down. It was stuff we already knew on this end, but it was still interesting to hear for once a more realistic and blunt assessment about the situation in society, versus the typical overly optimistic to the point of jumping the gun New Age perspective.
So I guess it all has to do with how one defines “awakening” or “waking up.” And I guess I have quite a different definition than most. !
So here’s a quick rundown of how I see it. And so as not to come across as “holier than thou,” there are still things on the following list that I’m guilty of myself, because I’m not there yet either. ;)
- Do you still believe that the President, Senate, Congress, etc. are really running things? If so….not awake.
- Do you still have a particular party that you allign yourself with and do you still vote? If so, not awake.
- Do you still watch entertainment programming on TV? Actually sit there through the commercials, vegging out? Follow particular sports teams? If so……not awake.
- Do you still go to the doctor every time you have a health issue, or take prescription meds, instead of researching natural healing and taking matters into your own hands? If so….not awake.
- Are you concerned with having money or running out of money? Retirement plans and 401Ks? If so……not awake.
- Do you still get caught up in petty gossip, friend/family/neighbor drama and workplace politics? Do petty tyrants always get the best of you? If so……not awake.
Are you conscious every second of your waking day, never “losing yourself”? If not…….then not awake. (and this item is particularly important as it relates to being able to be lucid while we sleep and being more conscious after we die.)
- Have you conquered your ego, and live every moment of your waking life in full awarness, and with the realization that you’re an extension of the Creator Source, out there in the world representing it in everything you do or say? If not….then not awake.
(the last items with all they involve are the biggest banes of my awakening process at the moment. ;) I’m amazed at anybody who can arrive at that point. Very difficult to do.) We have more power than we realize, with the ability to heal ourselves and make sure business is taken care of…but not via the traditional “3rd density routes” as we’ve all been taught. These are things I discuss in my various articles, so I won’t rehash it all here.
But anyway, that’s just a gist, to convey how I view “awakening,” versus what many overly optimistic people out there view it as. (And I can be all about the petty semantics, I admit, so it irks me to hear people declare that they’re “awake.” Confidentally declaring with certainty, “I’m awake!” I always think, X! no you’re not. Otherwise you wouldn’t still be here. You may be growing more aware, and in the process of awakening…but you’re in no way fully “awake.” I don’t think any of us could handle being here in a truly, fully awakened state. But that’s just my theory.)
So now that I’ve propelled a few readers into annoyed indignation after reading this list ;) I wonder……how can mass consciousness supposedly be “waking up” when the average person has yet to achieve most anything on this sample list? People prematurely get overly optimistic that “mass consciousness is awakening”….merely because people are disaffected with President Bush for instance. Because people want to vote Democrat instead. Because the New Age movie “The Secret” has become popular and featured on Larry King or because Rosie O’Donnell said on live TV that she dares to question the official story of 9/11 and how the WTCs buildings went down.
With regards to that last bit, part of me was like, “YEAH!!! woooo-HOOOOOO!” when I heard about Rosie, prompting me to run over to YouTube to download the clips and watch with glee. But I realized when I read the comments all over the ‘net in response to her (as well as all the other things I’ve witnessed of people and society in my everyday life over the years) that this society has a looooooooong way to go. There’s so much to say about it all, but after listening to her, after reading the negative hateful ditribes people were spewing in response to her, I concluded that it’s all more illusory game. The good guys versus the bad guys, the finger pointing and the drama. It just made me want to walk away from all of it even more than before, despite rooting for Rosie and anybody like her who would dare question things on such a public venue. I’m glad to see people daring to speak up and take a stand, I get mad at the puppet pawns who still believe in the illusion enough to ferociously attack those who question the lies we’re told, and yet I can see that the whole thing is more illusion, and if I’m getting annoyed at supposed “puppet pawns” then it means I’m not fully awake and there yet either. Because ultimately nobody’s right. Not the Bill O’Reillys and Ann Coulters, not the Rosie O’Donnells and 9/11 Truth Movement people, not the people who perpetrated the attack and pinned it on others, or the citizens who question it all. Not the people who watch TV asleep at the wheel and do nothing with their lives, or the people running around in the world like type-A maniacs always doing doing doing “productive” things. None of them are awake, not truly, in the big, REALLY big scheme of things. It’s all a game. All of it.
What a confusing mess.
It all ties back into an earlier post about “The Only Winning Move is Not to Play,” inspired by the movie “War Games.” Is that what we’re supposed to do? Walk away from all of it? I do wonder. It’s what Stuart Wilde advises in his book, “The Quickening,” one of my favorites. Like the computer in “War Games” I feel like I can sometimes see ahead to all possible outcomes and ultimately, none of it really matters. We’re just a blue and white speck revolving around an average sun in the middle of the galactic suburbia, lost in the shuffle. So many civilizations came and went before us, each with their own political and personal dramas that meant so much to them while they were embedded in it, wrapped up in it all, and yet ultimately….did it matter? They’re gone, without a trace. Sometimes only existing as hearsay and conjecture, as with Atlantis, Lemuria and Mu. That’s what became of them and everything that mattered to them….like cake or cookie batter that gets turned over with the spatula to the bottom of the bowl, soon disappearing altogether as it gets absorbed with the rest and changes completely to something new. That was them, and it will soon be us as we play this game that we get so caught up in, forgetting who we are and what’s really going on here.
So if all politics and personal drama and everything in between doesn’t matter in the big scheme of things, then what DOES matter?
I’ve concluded at this point that it’s all about trying to wake up as much as possible. For me it involves everything on that above sample list, and more. But becoming as aware as possible every second of every day, questioning and stalking all thoughts, urges and actions, learning to see through everything going on around us, and so on, while keeping that balanced, aware but emotionally neutral mindset. That in itself is a form of “consciousness raising” and has to lead to greater things beyond this reality. The sorts of things that we can take with us…long after our physical reality and civilzation crumbles. For me it also involves striving to become like whatever I’ve witnessed of my Higher Self, (which I wrote about in my article called “The Higher Self.”) To me that whole way of being is pretty amazing, so I’m shooting for that! :D Seriously.
Or like what I wrote about at the beginning of this “Thoughts” section……when I finally get tired of the game and see through it all and hopefully get to that point of utmost awareness and feel like I’m truly done, it’ll be cool to go sit down on that park bench somewhere and wait to see who shows up and sits down next to me. ;)
Tie-in article: ‘When Everybody’s On a Different Page’
Time to wake up and get the hell out of Dodge
(slightly modified from the original version which appeared on a message board that I participate in….)
A repeating dream theme for me over the past few years or so has been finding myself back in high school again. (Now, before clicking off of this post thinking, “Boooooring!” hang in there….it gets good, with some juicy high level concepts. ;) ) Not only that, but each and every time it’s into the second semester and I realize……….I’ve forgotten to go to math class all year. !!! I had gone at the beginning of the year, then something went awry and it just….slipped my mind and I stopped going. Haven’t turned in any homework, haven’t shown up for my tests and quizzes. The mistake/problem has become so big by that point that I don’t even want to try to remedy it, it seems beyond my fixing. The level of panic and helplessness can’t be described! Total stress moment!
Even more interesting is that “math class” and the big mix up always involves 3rd and 4th period. Some REALLY hazy confusion and mishaps where I’ve gone to 3rd when I should have been in 4th, and 4th when I should have gone to 3rd.
Is that a metaphor for 3rd and 4th density? Going to 3rd density when I should be in 4th???
Another added element to the “being back in high school” theme is that I’m running around in the morning in my old house in Connecticut where I grew up, trying to get ready and get out the door so I can catch the bus. Often times I miss it, only to realize………I have a car. My car, the one I currently own right now in this present, my Mazda Protege. I don’t need to ride the bus, because I have a car and can take care of myself and drive myself to school. Whew! Busses represent going along with the crowd, as well as our life paths, according to most dream dictionaries, so “remembering” that I have independent transportation would symbolically represent remembering that I can carve out my own independent niche and don’t have to go along with what the rest of the societal herd is doing.
And recently this dream theme has emerged again with a vengence, taking some REALLY interesting twists and turns!
In the latest and greatest version, I was back in high school again, a mish mosh of both Connecticut and California, (since I was in CT for 9th and 10th grades and CA for 11th and 12th) and, I hadn’t gone to math class for half the year. And even WITH the knowledge that I’d let the ball drop I STILL couldn’t get my act together. !!! It was like I was helpless to get myself back on track again, knowing that it was going to cause a major hiccup in my life at the end of the year………to the point where I wouldn’t be able to graduate, which is ANOTHER repeating dream theme often tacked on to these high school dreams. Like all the other dreams, I envisioned all the homework I hadn’t turned in, all the tests I hadn’t taken, and saw myself cramming at the last minute trying to learn and memorize a bunch of algebra gibberish that I didn’t even understand in order to pass. An impossible feat.
So I was fretting and panicking about the situation and how I wasn’t going to be able to graduate………..when I realized…………..THIS ISN’T REAL.
This isn’t real!!!!!!!!!!!! I DID already graduate….in 1993!!!!!! In real life!!! I HAVE my diploma, hello!!! I graduate 13 years ago and I HAVE my diploma!!!
And that’s when I realized/remembered that I was me, at my present age, (31) but for whatever reason had somehow gotten it in my head that I “needed” to go back to high school and do it again. I remembered how after I’d re-inserted myself back into high school I’d gotten so caught up in it all that I’d forgotten that it wasn’t real and that I already have my diploma. So there’s no need to stress. It isn’t real.
And it was like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. No more panic, stress or burden. I breathed better, and said, “You know what…I’m not going to class today, because I don’t actually HAVE to. And I’m not going to my job either.” (I had a job that was connected to the whole “going back” plan, but it wasn’t real either.)
So yeah, I’m thinking that this is all a “Big Message” and metaphor for something a lot bigger. If you get my drift.
We incarnated here because we thought we needed to, but we don’t have to be here. It’s not real. And it’s time to wake up to this and get the hell out of Dodge.
!
[Update: Have had more “school”-related dreams since the original posting of this entry. Some were interesting and almost comical, or symbolic and ambiguous. But the realization of “this isn’t real/time to wake up and get out of Dodge” wasn’t enough to squelch these dreams permanently. The most recent series, from late last year, were kind of funny – in one of the first ones I was once again in math class……and marveling that I not only remembered, but I showed up and had done my homework!!!!!!!!! I was on a roll, catching up. In another one I was in a classroom, scrambling and rifling through notebook paper, trying to keep up with my assignments and homework, but barely doing so and worrying about “running out of time.” Lot of details there I won’t get into, but in general I once again showed up, and was making an effort to do what needed to be done on my end. Then I finally apparently “graduated” in another dream that followed not long after. !!!! The first time ever in the history of these school dreams. I’ve never “Graduated” before. In fact if anything, it was always the constant threat of no graduation, and summer school/being left behind. In the dream I was hurrying down the school hallways, keyed up and alert, feeling slightly excited, on my way to my locker. I got there but then realized I didn’t remember the locker combination. Didn’t matter though, and I wasn’t worried anyway, because the lock somehow opened despite that. I was there to fetch my diploma, which was rolled up inside the locker. I snatched it up, having the clear distinctive thought that I should grab it and run……….before somebody realizes they may have made a mistake and tries to take it back!! :D :D :D Too funny. There was more to that dream too, but that’s the gist that’s important. And several months ago I had a weirdly symbolic dream. Again, in a classroom. This time not only did I show up, but the math homework was done, and done early, and totally complete, piled neatly before me on my desk, as I sat there looking up at the clock, waiting for “5” to arrive (5th density/death?) feeling bored, and clearly thinking, “Why am I still here?? I’m done with my work. It’s time to go.” I knew that when 5 (death?) arrived, I’d be heading off to the floor above me. (the next density up? Evolving?) But in general I was ahead of the game and had done everything I’d needed to do, totally on top of things. Another first. It had never been that way before in any of my dreams. Who knows if these dreams have higher symbolic meaning, although I’m sure they do on some level.]
They Gave us their Minds
“I want to appeal to your analytical mind,” don Juan said. “Think for a moment, and tell me how you would explain the contradiction between man the engineer and the stupidity of his systems of beliefs, or the stupidity of his contradictory behavior. Sorcerers believe that the predators have given us our systems of beliefs, our ideas of good and evil, our social mores. They are the ones who set up our hopes and expectations and dreams of success and failure. They have given us covetousness, greed, and cowardice. It is the predators who make us complacent, routinary, and egomaniacal.”
“But how can they do this, don Juan?” I asked. “Do they whisper all that in our ears while we sleep?”
“No, they don’t do it that way. That’s idiotic!” don Juan said, smiling. “They are infinitely more efficient and organized than that. In order to keep us obedient and meek and weak, the predators engaged themselves in a stupendous maneuver – stupendous, of course, from the point of view of a fighting strategist. A horrendous maneuver from the point of view of those who suffer it. They gave us their mind! Do you hear me! The predators give us their mind, which becomes our mind. The predators mind is baroque, contradictory, morose, filled with fear of being discovered any minute now.”
“The Active Side of Infinity” – Carlos Castaneda
Several times over the past few years I’ve encountered people on the internet who either: 1) Have a “I hate humanity” viewpoint, wishing that Man would be wiped off the face of the Earth because of the atrocities humans commit, or 2) have the even more drastic viewpoint that the Reptilians and Grays are actually the “good guys” while humans are the evil little rug rats that the Reps and Grays must contend with like an exasperated parent.
With regards to item 1, I can understand the frustration people have with the way humans have mistreated the planet, as well as each other, and why some people would then conclude that the best thing would be to eliminate Mankind. Humans are after all evil, right? We kill, rape and abuse each other, and the animals, and destroy the planet at every turn, with no regards for anything but ourselves. So get rid of humans! Burn, all of them, burn!
The problem here is that most humans aren’t out there committing acts of horrors. Most people just want to live their lives and raise their families and do their thing in peace, not kill, maim and destroy other people, animals and the planet. So the people getting frustrated who are hoping for a nice big comet to swing around and whack us all back to whence we came are judging all of humanity based on the acts of a few. If humanity was left to its own devises, without all the destructive influences and manipulations that have been placed around us to squelch us down at every turn and steer us down a dark path, then we’d see a very different Planet Earth right now, that’s all I can say.
As noted in the above “Active Side of Infinity” excerpt, the human race has been purposely held down by what don Juan refers to as “the Predators,” who have even gone as far as to give us their mind. Humans are instilled with their captors’ minds, which causes them to behave in ways that they wouldn’t have otherwise…and who in turn gets the blame?
Humans.
Why? Because most people can’t see the Predators. They lack “the sight” (another thing that has been stripped from all but the few exceptional holdovers…) and because they can’t see the enemy working behind the scenes, they mistakenly conclude that the enemy is us.
I don’t advocate the “victim mindset” as readers who are familiar with my stuff know, so I don’t mention this so people can throw their hands up in frustration and shirk all responsibility for their actions. “I’m just a poor human, at the mercy of the Predators! I can’t help what I do, I have no control over my own mind!” X! Think again. It’s an uphill battle, but we can gain the upperhand on our thoughts and actions. In fact, I highly recommend reading the full chapter I excerpted from, because it explains what we can do to gain the upper hand on our situation, and provides the Big Picture perspective on it all:
www.harmonymindbodyspirity.com
So, they’ll be no copping out allowed here. ;) (and btw, thanks to the Harmony Mind Body Spirit website for providing this transcript excerpt for the public — I found his site when researching this don Juan quote, and it looks like a great website worth checking out.)
But, you can see now how the game has been rigged. Strip humans of our sixth sense sight, so the average person can’t see the critters from the other realms and what they’re doing, give humans the predator mind, and even shadow them/possess them so they act in very un-human ways…then turn the tables and blame the humans for the very thing that the Neg entities are manipulating them to do. Very deceptive. It’s also known as “projection.” In more extreme cases you have “humans” running around in the world that aren’t even human. Masqueraders. Or else those who are highly influenced/shadowed or outright possessed by Neg entities, acting as their puppets. There is a world of puppets out there, from the heads of corporations to the leaders of key institutions, political players and world leaders who are warring, killing and destroying the planet, while enacting more policies of control, and ensuring that the average person is squelched down, held back and kept out of the game. And meanwhile, some of the sensitive real humans watching it all on the sidelines end up feeling so despondent and helpless about it all that they begin to hate their own species and wish for something to come along and wipe it all out. Little do they know it’s not their race to blame.
So what we REALLY need to do is to wake up and realize that there are such things as Predators/Neg entities exacting their influence in all aspects of this world. Then, put our foot down and no longer allow them to affect us in our own every day personal spheres of influence, and no longer tolerate what they are doing to the planet. But the solution isn’t to wish for the elimination of ALL humans, the good, well meaning ones along with the shadowed/possessed masqueraders. To mistakenly come to that conclusion means the Negs really have won. It means you can’t see what’s really happening here, and you’ve been deceived.
A second aspect of the deception, as mentioned earlier in item #2, involves the Negs revealing themselves to select people…but then portraying themselves as being the good guys, while trying to convince these people that humanity is really the bad guy here who needs to be managed. Again, it’s table turning, deception and projection that relies on the simple fact that most people no longer have their psychic capabilities and ability to “see” what’s really happening. So sure, these select (gullible) people might be “allowed” to view the Negs while being told all kinds of things…but it’s in a highly controlled circumstance. They lack the sight, which means they’re still not seeing the Negs for what they really are and what they’re really doing on a mass scale. If they could, then I’m sure they’d tell the Negs to take a hike. From what I can tell though, only a certain type of person actually falls for the slick charisma of the Neg entities who attempt this table turning tactic – those who are already “on the fence” of going over to the dark side, with an already disgruntled, dark mindset that resonates with division, hate, and control.
So, keep all this in mind the next time you encounter a frustrated but well meaning soul who’s fed up with what they’re seeing in this world and who believes the planet would be better off without people, or that the behavior of a few unfortunately, represents the majority. It doesn’t. Speak up and remind people that what we’re seeing isn’t true humanity, it’s the influence of the “Predators” and Neg entities. The Negs really want people to start hating themselves and humanity though, and I’d go as far as to say that there seems to be an all out campaign happening to get us thinking in this manner. See…if we hate ourselves and don’t see the good in our own species and don’t even believe it exists, then we’re not going to fight back against stuff that wants to oppress us, or flat out take us over. Instead of fighting back, our chins will be down on our chests as we kick rocks around and mumble that “we deserve it” ‘cause “we suck.” No, actually, we don’t. So it’s time to turn the tables from our end.
___
We’re all ultimately responsible for ourselves though, and so I really recommend reading the Carlos Castaneda books for more insight into the Toltec ways, which involves being aware of the energy feeders/hidden controllers and learning how to conserve our energy so we can break free of their influence, among the many other topics that the Castaneda books cover. “The Fire From Within” is a personal fave of mine, and “The Active Side of Infinity” is also good. I also recommend Stuart Wilde’s “Infinite Self – 33 Steps to Reclaiming Your Personal Power” for another book that helps teach the reader how to gain control over their lives and take responsibility.
(See my related article The Veils of Awakening which discusses the concept of hypderdimensional manipulation of humans and our world and how many conspiracy researchers don’t take this into account when trying to decipher what’s really going on here on Earth….)
The Only Winning Move
Recently I experienced a renewed interest in the 1983 movie “War Games,” starring Matthew Broderick, Ally Sheedy and Dabney Coleman. I enjoyed the movie as a kid due to the suspenseful topic it dealt with — a seventeen year old computer hacker (Broderick) accidentally connects into NORAD’s computer system, and for fun, instructs the computer to play a simulation of “Global Thermo Nuclear War,” posing as the Russian side and launching a simulated nuclear strike against the U.S. Meanwhile, NORAD doesn’t realize it’s a hacker playing a game against the computer and thinks it’s the real deal, nearly launching a nuclear counter attack against Russia in defense. They finally figure out what’s happening and back down, only to discover that the computer has now taken over the missile system and is going to launch its arsenal…for real. The situation gets down to DefCon 1, and the computer has to “learn” via “self teaching” in the final minutes before launch that there can be no winners in a nuclear war, no matter what strategy is implemented.
“War Games” stands on its own as a great movie with a relevant plot for what was occurring in the 80’s, but there’s also a higher spiritual double meaning to it all. I recognized it several years ago actually, and what I got in my mind at the time was a “thought ball” regarding how it seems Mankind is here in the Game trying on all these roles — male-female, good guy-bad guy, this religion-that religion, this skin color-that skin color, the persecutor-the persecuted — until after having tried on every role and played every part it wears itself out into sheer exhaustion and makes the inevitable “!!!” lightbulb realization about life here in 3rd density and grasps the Bigger Picture of it all. Exactly as the computer at the end of “War Games” does, running through a manic simulation of every possible strategy and counter strategy moments before missile launch. Missile trajectories and targets explode in bright flashes on all the computer screens, more and more, faster and faster, as every tactical strategy is explored, and the roomful of NORAD personnel and military brass watch with baited breath. Then the screens go blank. The missiles stop, the flashing ceases. Everybody waits. The computer finally speaks, concluding:
“A Strange game.
The only winning move is
not to play.
How about a nice game of chess?”
The only winning move is not to play. Think about that. “Spiritual wise men” will tell you that only a fool will stand and fight, while the wise man walks away. And while some battles are probably worth fighting, how many actually aren’t? How many are we wasting our time and energy with? Recently I was thinking about this idea, and found myself thinking about “War Games” once again, and how aptly it fits.
A couple of times in life I’ve encountered manipulated fight situations where I found myself up against several people who weren’t even acting human. Their tactics, the things they were saying/accusing, and their way of responding just wasn’t “right.” It was a situation that generated extreme frustration, sometimes to the point of tears, because no matter what I said, I just kept getting robotic voiced responses. They’d say something to fire me up, and then respond back with cold, passive detachment, ignoring my responses and firing off more stuff, and more stuff, to keep me perpetually spinning off onto side topics. It was literally like going up against a robot/computer, and there was no winning. The only response was to…walk away. To not play the game. Recognize that I could not get through to these “people” and save my precious energy and instead, engage myself with nice people who were real, and sane.
Right now as I type this I’m facing it again. Because of who I’m dating, I’ve found myself a “target” by people who have something against him. My name has been dredged up on their message board forum and false speculation/accusations are being made about me, and the nature of our relationship. When I read some of the latest being said this morning (it’s a tired, years-old issue that has recently resurfaced again over the past several weeks) I caught my breath, and my face became instantly hot. Couldn’t breathe right for several seconds and my nerves stood on end and my heart began racing.
The first inclination of course was to get on that forum and defend myself, to come out swinging in some way. In fact, several weeks ago I got on there and composed a response that addressed some claims (in a rational way intended as a one-time-only deal, to address lies being said) and so I wanted to get on there and do that again this morning. It was a tough choice to make, and I was tempted to break that “one time only” intention, but I kept hearing the old War Games mantra in my mind: “The only winning move is not to play.” Walk away. Recognize when a battle is futile and a waste of precious energy. I realized…remember who you’re dealing with here. !! Past experiences with the leaders of that group have been anything but human. It’s not worth it. So let people say what they will. Those who follow along and listen to libelous gossip speculation and thrive on that are people that I don’t need to be concerned with anyway. I’ve said that to others when trying to comfort them, but now it’s my turn to remember the same!
At the same time I was trying to catch my breath and regain my “!!” indignation after reading the false speculations, I simultaneously received a slew of what I consider to be positive number sightings. 11:11, 11:22, 11:33 and 12:12. I had the urge to glance at the clock four times in an hour, and it was at those exact four times. At 11:33 I sat there, head in my hands, skin flushed and hot, thinking “grrrr…” re-grouping my thoughts, looking at this highly meaningful number staring back at me on the LCD clock and I realized…..you gotta walk away. That’s what this means. 11 — the initiate. 33 — the master. “The only winning move is not to play.”
Indeed.
Living on Formulaic Repeat Mode
We were watching the movie “1984” the other night and it reminded me of something I haven’t thought about since reading the original book it was based on — the idea of computer generated entertainment/media. In the world of 1984, the Proles are amused and placated with computer generated music, books, porn, and more. And they’re too stupid to notice or care!
In my “Working for the Puppet People” article I talked about how the world as we know it, and the “way that things are done” is already set up and in place before we’re born, and we arrive on the scene and just pick up where our parents left off. It’s like we’re all operating on a template here. They’ve eliminated many options for how to do things and how to live life. It’s the same old, same old, year in and year out.
Well, that’s the Bigger Picture.
On a smaller scale, looking at the entire entertainment and media industry as a whole — movies, books, magazines, television, music and radio, newspapers, etc. — it’s the exact same thing. So much of it is “formula” that never changes, week in and month out and year after year, that it’s no different from “1984.” It seriously may as well be computer generated. It’s something I noticed years ago, but at this point it’s starting to scare me. I think because over the past few years I’ve had to question how “real” this reality is, and when you start to notice things like this, in conjunction with all the weird stuff, it can just get a bit scary.
Magazines — Every month, every woman’s magazine out there puts out the same exact content. It never changes. Sex, relationships, celebs, makeup and fashion, more sex, more fashion, repeat. MOST magazines though are this way though. So few are producing content that is truly fresh and changing. In fact recently, “Men’s Health” was busted repeating its latest cover from an October 2007 issue. “According to Gawker, Men’s Health has been recycling covers—headlines and layouts since 2004. Since 2007, Men’s Health has featured “Flat-Belly Foods,” “Get Back Into Shape,” and “Lose Your Gut” at least twice a year, and a “Six-Pack Abs” at least once a year since 2005.” But it’s not just Men’s Health, it’s any of these generic, mainstream mags churning out the same stale material, month after month.
Books — So many authors out there are churning out formula novels that lack passion and energy driving the words that it’s like a computer could have written them. Especially in the fiction mystery-detective / espionage thriller / sci-fi…and “Chic Lit” genres. And Danielle Steele. !!! Her stuff is so badly written, so cardboard and flat, that I don’t get how it’s gotten this far. There’s so many more though…next time you cruise through your local bookstore, just look, and I mean really look at the books on the tables and on the shelves. It’s very scary.
The comics — The same old strips, year after year after year, with the same old mindless recycled plots. There are only a handful of innovative strips that are saying something. A few years ago my favorite had been the Boondocks. If only all comics were like the Boondocks, but no. Instead, you get Beetle Bailey and Hagar and Blondie and Marmaduke and….ahhhhh!!! Somebody stab me right now!!!!!!!!!!!
The radio — Across America, every city has the same set up on their radio dial. The call letters may be different, but the music they play, and their formats are near-identical. No matter what the genre of music, they all have their play lists with the same 50 — 100 songs that they play over and over and over and over….sometimes, in the same exact order! I’ve worked with co-workers who found it comforting to have their radios on while working, always set to the same station, listening to the same songs day in and day out…week after week, month after month. It didn’t bother them, but it drove me absolutely batty! Humans love familiarity, there’s this need to feel secure and safe, and repetitive ritual is the surest route to creating the illusion of a safety net in life. Listening to the same radio station and music every single day is one of the ways this is achieved.
Movies — As noted in my write up, “Television — and the media in general” the movie industry is also operating on “repeat mode”, cranking out the same formula movies year after year after year. Different actors and actresses, same movies. When will people see this?? Not all movies are this way, but enough are that it needs to be noted.
And while we’re at it, let me mention the Christmas holiday season. Every year it gets worse and worse, and more and more over the top. But talk about the same old repeating template. !!! The same holiday songs. The same batch of holiday movies played on TV. The same decorations. The same ritual tradition. The same media-induced mania to shop til you drop. Year after endless year, it never ends. It’s total insanity. Don’t be afraid to walk away from it. I haven’t celebrated Christmas in years, and it’s very liberating!
Anyway, those are the highlights, enough to get the reader to notice the rest on their own. Everywhere you look, we have “Life on Formulaic Repeat Mode.” Even world events and what you find in the newspapers never changes. Decades ago there was famine and poverty in Africa, war in the Middle East, poverty and political upheaval and corruption and drug running in Mexico, Central and South America, oppression in China. Years later, here we are….and nothing has changed. Oh sure, things do change….but let’s face it, most of it stays the same. It’s seriously like somebody put the world on Repeat Mode and walked away – and that goes for all of it, from the bigger happenings of the countries, all the way down to the minutae that fills in the blanks of our every day lives. Once you realize this, look around — at everything — and start to really notice how much of what’s around us never changes, how we’re just living out a pre-determined template in every way, down to the smallest details. Then walk away, pull back, retreat, and start doing things differently. Become independent of “the matrix”, if you will. Don’t settle for repetitive ritual and comfort and security. And read “1984” while you’re at it, if you haven’t already. Actually, even if you have, read it again, it can’t hurt! It’s a mirror for what we’re already seeing around us, every day.
Getting to See Behind Reality
We moved to Charlottesville, Virginia in September 2004. When we did, reality worked out very well for us and within a week of arriving, we were moving into our new apartment. Like my move to Florida, once again, I was landing on my feet. (this time there was another person involved, my boyfriend, so it wasn’t just me and my cat anymore.) The apartment was spacious and beautiful, and everything that I’d mentally “custom ordered” when I thought about what I’d like in a place to live – both inside, AND out. Outside was woods and a bubbling creek that we can hear when the windows are open during warmer weather, and the Rivanna hiking trail and lots of wildlife. Deer, birds, squirrels, you name it. It was so perfect. Even the apartment number, 111, indicated something higher was at work. The apartments were privately owned and rented, and our landlady operated the old fashioned way – a personal face-to-face interview and human intuition determined whether she would rent to us, not credit checks and background investigations. It was just so perfect and easy.
Then sometime in October, I was laying down one night for a nap, and that’s when it happened. I got to see what had really happened behind the curtain of reality as I thought I knew it. The behind the scenes workings. And it wasn’t pretty.
Whatever I was seeing wasn’t “3rd density”, so to explain what it looked like in a literal sense is impossible, because it wasn’t just “seeing”, there was psychic / intuitive knowing as well. I “saw” that the way I currently knew reality to be, living in Virginia in our nice perfect apartment, where everything fell into place so perfectly, was not actually how reality originally went. The real way it went was a tangled mess. My boyfriend and I were no longer together, we weren’t in Viriginia either, and my cat had died a long time ago. Which wasn’t suprising, being that there have been several attempts at “interference” with her to take her out of the picture, hopefully countered by my many intentions for her protection. I saw a messy tangle of black and brown color, chaotic movement, like seeing people shuffling the scenary around backstage – changing things – overwriting reality – and just a telepathic knowing at the same time. “Seeing” that what I’m living now is a SERIOUSLY altered version of what originally transpired. Again it wasn’t 3rd density seeing as we know it, it was something else.
It was shocking, yet not surprising. After that I couldn’t sleep anymore and so got up, wandering back out into the livingroom, with a weirded out look on my face, where my boyfriend was on the computer. I sat down in one of our chairs, feeling numbed.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, curious.
I took a breath, and began to try to explain what had just happened. “Well…um….you know how everything worked out so perfectly for us when we moved here? The way it all just fell into place the way it did?”
“Yeah?”
“Like, too perfectly?”
“Yeah….” his face changed, getting a look of knowing. He was sensing where this was going, and like me, also sensed that things had worked out almost suspiciously perfect for us.
“Well…that’s not how it originally went. I saw how it originally went, and this is not how it was,” I laughed nervously, looking around our perfect apartment. And I explained it to him.
He wasn’t surprised.
This reality is a wondrous thing. Whatever it is. Part of me would love to know what’s really happening here, but on the other hand I’m a bit nervous to actually find out.
Living in Two Worlds
There are two versions of what it is to “live in two worlds” and it ties into the old phrase “talking the talk and walking the walk.” There are those who, either because of some earth shattering revelation or an incident(s) that rocked them to the core, know that reality isn’t what what we were raised to believe it is. And they live their lives accordingly. They work because let’s face it, we’re still in 3rd density, which means we have to eat and keep a roof over our heads; but despite having to do that, they don’t actually believe in the “mainstream” world. Voting and elections, politics and world affairs, TV, “science”, mainstream schooling / college, they don’t believe any of it, because they’ve seen or experienced something that has burst that bubble. They participate only as much as they absolutely have to, and keep a safe distance on the sidelines.
Then there are those who read all the metaphysical and conspiracy material and even participate in messageboards and such on these topics…but yet something isn’t clicking with them. They still believe in the illusion. They talk all this talk, but then turn around… and watch TV., vote, follow sports, fall for advertising campaigns, chase money, and so on. It’s a case of knowing something intellectually, but not really acting on it, or living it. Why? Mostly, because they have yet to experience one of those aforementioned core shaking events that permanently jars them out of the stupor. All it takes is one incident. Some get it through drugs, other through being an abductee, and others from being psychic and seeing the other realms. No matter how they got there, the fact is, they got there.
Even I still fall for aspects of the illusion in many ways. I keep slipping back under, as it could be called. Getting sucked back in, forgetting things….but yet, on purpose, because what else am I supposed to do? I have to live here in 3rd. Am I supposed to just…float away, into another realm? But weeeelllll actually…….
I’ve had moments in my life where I felt like I could walk away from the illusion of it all and just…drift off and disappear from this reality. Just “knew” that this was possible. Mostly when I was living down in Florida, and after reading some Stuart Wilde material. ;) It’s inspiring stuff, what can I say. I didn’t end up acting on it, because part of me kind of wasn’t done here yet. Maybe there’s a little more to see? Something else to do? And so I didn’t pursue it. It felt premature. The timing wasn’t right. I always know in the back of my mind though that the option is available. When I’m ready, I’ll go walking off and find a park, and sit down on a bench and wait. That was the idea I had back in Florida. Walk away, and go wait….someone will show up. You’ll see. So, I’m very curious to see who shows up and sits down next to me….but when the timing is right.
[ Funny update – Sometime around the end of July, early August of 2008, more than two years after originally writing this post I was on my lunch break where we currently live, Charlottesville, sitting on a bench downtown, eating and knitting. My thoughts as usual were random and all over the place as I knitted, including thinking about the whole “sitting on the bench” thing, and waiting to see who shows up. I was thinking back on this post and my original thoughts on it all, but I was thinking about it in the past…..not putting myself in the present.
As I knitted and enjoyed the afternoon on my lunch break, a young black woman approached where I was sitting and said “Hi!” as if she knew me, looking right at me….seeming to wait for recognition. She took a seat on the other little bench that was right next to me, still watching me. I had no idea who she was but said hi back anyway, a little puzzled. Then went back to my knitting. She just sat there, not really seeming as if she had anything to do necessarily, and just occasionally kept her eye on me knitting. It gave me the feeling that she was waiting for something, or maybe expected something, but I had no idea who she was. She asked what I was knitting, and I explained that it was a sock. She smiled and nodded and admired it. She was probably about 30, and had a Caribbean accent. Eventually I had to go, since my break was over and that was that.
Only hours later, way after the fact did anything even register with me at all…………..I had been thinking back on my original idea of sitting down on a bench and waiting to see who sits down next to me…….then this girl does exactly that. Saying hi to me as if she knew who I was even though I had never seen her in my life, and seeming to wait expectantly for something. !! I almost laughed out loud at the coincidence of it all, with the offhand wondering if the situation was what I thought it might be. If so, then it’s kind of eye rollingly funny that I didn’t recognize the situation, at all………only because the person who sat down next to me didn’t look at all like I envisioned. Admittedly I always imagined that when the time came, it would be some older homeless guy since those have always typically been the interesting characters that I cross paths with out in the world who have either a magical vibe or random words of wisdom, the guys who live on the outside of society because they know what the real deal is. But a young black female who looks about my age, with a Caribbean accent was not who I ever expected. So therefore, maybe I totally overlooked the whole situation. I don’t know. It’s probably not that at all, and probably just a random coincidence. Although I doubt it, and I really could kick myself.]
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Carissa Conti