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SPOV

A couple days before my doctor’s appointment, I went over to my best friend’s apartment for dinner. I told Amelia I had some big news for her and she invited me over so we could talk. I was surprised in myself for not having told her something was up sooner, but I couldn’t wait any longer. I made us a pan of brownies since there would be lots of girl talk, and headed over.

Amelia lived about ten minutes from me, and that came in handy quite frequently. I couldn’t count the number of times we had quick get-togethers so we could bitch about whatever guy had recently broken our hearts or screwed us over.

When I got to her apartment, I knocked on the door and waited for her to come answer it. When she did, she was on the phone, obviously arguing with someone.

“No, Bobby, that’s fine. You go ahead and do that,” she said in that dangerous tone that should have told Bobby he was on thin ice. “Why would I be mad that you’re going there? If you want to spend the night staring at fake tits and c-section scars that’s your business, but don’t even think about coming over here later. No, I’m not jealous! No, I… no! Fine, whatever. Have fun, asshole!”

She hung up and threw her phone on the couch.

“What’s going on there?” I asked.

“He’s going to some sleazy strip club with his buddies, which means there will be drinks and lapdances and he’ll either show up here in the middle of the night looking to get lucky, or he’ll end up getting blown by one of the strippers,” she said, and rubbed her forehead. “I swear, I’m this close to breaking up with him, Sookie.”

“I’m sorry sweetie,” I frowned. “I don’t think he’d really cheat on you though.”

“I do,” she sighed, and then added, “It happened once before.”

“What?”

“It was this party with his friends,” she said, and started walking toward her kitchen. “He said it was a drunken mistake and it would never happen again. We were only together for about a month at the time, and since he came clean about it and swore to me that it wouldn’t happen again I decided to give him another chance. But we’ve been fighting a lot lately and it’s just… I don’t know what I’m doing with him anymore.”

“If you don’t have a reason to stay, then you shouldn’t.”

“It’s just hard, you know? Because when it’s good, it’s really good. I want to think this is just a rough patch and we’ll get through it, but I don’t know if I even want to put the effort into fighting for it,” she opened the fridge, and grabbed a bottle of wine. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“Just the fact that you can assume he’ll just cheat is enough for me to see you’re not into it anymore.”

“Yeah,” she agreed, and poured two glasses of wine. She handed one of them to me and said, “I should probably just chock this up to a loss and move on.”

“Whatever you decide, I’ll be there for you,” I said, and looked down at the wine I couldn’t drink. “Do you mind if I just have water?”

“If that’s what you want,” she eyed me suspiciously. “This is your favorite chardonnay you’re refusing, you know that, right?”

“Yeah,” I said a bit sheepishly.

She took my glass back and said, “You know where the water is. I have to drop the pasta in the pot.”

“Okay,” I said, and went to the fridge to get a bottle of water. “So what are you making?”

“Pasta primavera with sauteed chicken,” she said, as she dropped the fresh pasta into the water.

“Awesome,” I smiled. “I brought brownies.”

Amelia was the better cook between us. I did alright, and I could bake like nobody’s business, but I wasn’t a great chef.

“God bless you,” she said gratefully. “So why are you skipping the wine?”

I took a deep breath and let it out before answering her. “That’s why I wanted to talk to you,” I said.

“Uh oh. You’re stalling. Please don’t tell me you have cancer or you’re dying,” she dropped her pasta stirrer on the counter.

“I don’t, and I’m not,” I said. “I’m pregnant.”

“Shut the front door!” she stared at me. “Is it Eric’s?”

I gave her an incredulous look.

“What? It’s a legit question,” she insisted, and then turned around to flip her chicken over.

“How is that a legit question? You know I’ve only been with him in the last year.”

“Shit happens?” she shrugged, and turned to face me again. “So does he know?”

“Yeah, and we’ve talked about it. We decided to keep it,” I told her.

“Wow,” she looked surprised. “He didn’t bolt? You didn’t have to lobotomize him or anything?”

“No, he was actually really great about it. I mean, at first I don’t think he realized how scary it was for me since all we knew was that a condom had broken. But then I missed my period and he came over when I took the tests.”

“That’s good. You’re sure he’s not going to bolt on you?” Amelia asked, and stirred the pasta. “I mean, guys say they won’t, but then you start to show and reality hits…”

“Honestly, I’m still a little afraid that’s going to happen,” I admitted. “But I brought Hadley up to him, and he said he wouldn’t do that. I believe he means it, but it’s not like either one of us have been in this situation before.”

“And you could always bolt on him,” she suggested.

“I don’t want to though.”

“Yeah, but can you do it alone?” Amelia asked. “I’m not trying to be negative or anything, just playing Devil’s advocate here. I mean, what if things don’t work out with you guys? Are you sure you can do this alone?”

“I’m not sure, no. I think we’re both mature enough that if things don’t work out between us, we wouldn’t let our child suffer for it. And I don’t think I’d be alone. I’d have Eric.”

“Okay, but what if you do end up alone?” she asked. “He seems like a great guy and all, but… it happens, Sook. I just want you to be prepared for that.”

“I don’t know,” I admitted sadly. “I suppose I would figure it out. My mother didn’t raise me to be dependent on a man. I think I’ll have a better idea of that when I start showing and feel the baby move. It’ll be more real then.”

“Are you happy about this? I mean, I know you didn’t plan this or you would have been talking babies like nobody’s business, but like, you’re good with this?” she asked nervously.

“I wouldn’t say happy. It’s not how I pictured it happening. I’m okay with it because I have to be right now, but I have a feeling that it’s not the worst thing in the world. I always wanted to be a mom, it’s just happening a little out of order.”

“Well you know I have your back, right?” she smiled at me. “Whatever you need. Lamaze partners, someone to help pick out adorable baby clothes… I’m there for you.”

“I know,” I smiled, and went over to hug her. “And I love you for it.”

“I love you too,” she squeezed me back. “So how pregnant are you?”

“Not very. I have a doctor’s appointment in a couple days to figure all that stuff out.”

She nodded, and then pulled the big pot with the pasta off the stove to go drain it in the sink. “How’d Eric take it when you told him? Did he freak out?”

“We kind of both knew it was a possibility for two weeks, but he wasn’t really freaked out until I told him I’d missed my period. It was actually not that bad, really. I freaked out more than he did, and he stayed calm. It was a good balance.”

“That’s good,” she said as she shook the colander. “He didn’t propose to you, did he?”

“God, no,” I laughed. “We both agreed that marriage is not something either of us is ready for.”

“Thank fuck,” she said, and dropped the pasta back into its pan before adding what looked like homemade alfredo sauce to the pot.

“He did talk about moving in together if we’re still a couple before the baby comes.”

“That’s not a bad idea,” Amelia nodded, and added vegetables to the pot.

“It’ll definitely help with the nighttime feedings.”

“Well yeah, but it would probably make things better all the way around.”

“How so?”

“Living together means you’re pretty stable in your relationship, right? I mean, that’s not usually a decision you make in the heat of the moment. Well, you don’t,” she laughed. “I would do something like that, but you’re way more responsible and methodical than I am.”

“If I was responsible, I wouldn’t be pregnant right now,” I said.

“I thought you said there was faulty contraception?”

“There was, but we should have doubled up. I wasn’t quick enough to get on birth control.”

“Haven’t you been together for like, five months or something?” Amelia arched an eyebrow at me. “Besides, condoms are better than nothing, and I speak from experience on this.”

“Yeah, that’s what I mean. We’ve only been having sex for like four months of it,” I said. “And what do you mean you speak from experience?”

“As in I have done the unprotected sex thing before. Not very smart on my part, but I was lucky. I was also like, sixteen at the time so it didn’t hit me how bad it could be if I wasn’t careful. I have since learned the error of my ways,” she said.

“It’s so scary,” I said. “And that was the only time we’ve ever had a broken condom. I can’t believe that’s all it took.”

“I guess you guys just got lucky,” she snickered, and then said, “Dinner’s ready whenever you want to eat.”

“It smells good, and I’m starving, so feed me,” I said as I got down plates.

“Help yourself. I have to run to the bathroom real quick,” she said, and then headed toward her bedroom.

I filled my plate and took it and my water to the table and sat down. The pasta was delicious, and the chicken just… ugh I needed to hire Amelia as my own personal chef. When she came back into the kitchen I told her so.

“Why thank you,” she took a little bow, and fixed herself a plate as well before joining me at the table. “So you being with child was the big news, right? You’re not going to tell me you’re leaving me here all alone, or that you’ve decided to give up carbs for the rest of your life, right?”

“No,” I laughed. “That was the big news. I’m going to be a baby mama, and you’re going to be a baby godmama.”

“I feel like this calls for celebratory milkshakes or something,” she said before stuffing her face with an absurd amount of pasta.

“We could do that,” I smiled. “And the job is only yours if you want it.”

“Umm you best consider that position filled, missy,” she stared me down.

“Done.”

“Good,” she said with her mouth full.

“Will you also promise to kick Eric’s ass for me if he bolts in six months?”

“Oh I’ll do you one better,” she set down her fork. “I’ll make a phone call to Tray. Eric won’t get more than a block away before he gets his ass handed to him by a bunch of scary bikers.”

“That sounds even better,” I said. But I really didn’t think it would ever need to happen. “You know, why aren’t you and Tray together?”

“Me and Tray?” she asked incredulously and started laughing.

“Don’t laugh! I think you two would be adorable together.”

“Oh come on, Sookie! People don’t get much more different than Tray and me,” she shook her head. “Besides, he’s got his business, his kid and don’t forget that psycho of an ex-wife.”

“Sometimes the best matches are the ones that don’t make sense looking from the outside in.”

“Eh,” she shrugged.

“I’m just saying… Your first instinct was to call him.”

“So that means I should date him?” Amelia quirked an eyebrow.

“It means he’s on your mind,” I smiled, and started stuffing my own mouth with delicious pasta.

“No it doesn’t!” she scoffed. “It means you said something about needing someone’s ass kicked, and there is no one better at kicking ass than Tray. I fail to see how that means we should start bumping uglies.”

“I’m just saying…” I smiled, but said no more on the topic.

oOoOoOo

“I went to Amelia’s tonight and told her about the baby,” I told Eric on the phone later that night as I was lying in bed.

“What’d she say?” he asked in a rather emotionless tone.

“She was being a good friend,” I said. “She’s got my back.”

“That’s good. You should have all the support you can get,” he said.

“So should you.”

“Yeah I haven’t told anyone yet,” he admitted. “I’m going to wait until after we see the doctor and know for sure.”

“Do you want to meet before or just meet there?”

“Meeting there would be better. I can take a long lunch, but I can’t be gone all day.”

“Okay,” I said.

“But we can have dinner that night if you want,” he offered.

“That would be nice,” I said. “I’m nervous.”

“About what?” he asked. “Just the appointment in general, or more than that?”

“The appointment, the results, all of it.”

“I’m sure everything will be okay,” he said.

“I know, but it doesn’t mean I can’t be nervous about it.”

“I didn’t say you couldn’t be.”

“I’m sorry,” I sighed. “When I have too much time to think I freak myself out.”

“Want me to come over for a while?” he offered. “Or you could come here if you want.”

“It’s not too late?”

“We could just sleep,” he suggested. “Maybe that’ll make you feel better. Sometimes just not being alone helps.”

“Yeah it does. I’ll come over.”

“I’ll leave the front door unlocked for you.”

“Thank you,” I smiled, and got up to get my shoes on. “I’ll be there soon.”

“I’ll be waiting.”

“Bye,” I said, and hung up the phone.

I pulled my shoes on, grabbed my purse, and headed over to Eric’s place. Thankfully he was only a few blocks away so it didn’t take long to get there. Like he said, he left the door unlocked, so I went on in and locked it back.

“Eric?” I called out.

“In the kitchen!” he called back.

I headed in and found Eric scooping ice cream into bowls.

“Hey,” I smiled and wrapped my arms around him from behind.

“Hi,” he said. “I hope you still like cookie dough.”

“I do indeed. You’re a sweetheart.”

“You are the girl that told me there’s nothing a big bowl of ice cream can’t fix, right?” he asked as he handed me one of the bowls.

“That’s right,” I smiled as I took it from him, then stretched up on my toes to kiss him.

“There’s whipped cream in the fridge if you want some,” he smiled at me.

“Yes please,” I said, and went to get it. “You want some?”

“It’ll just go straight to my hips,” he teased, but then added, “Sure.”

“You’re not the one that needs to be worried about your hips.”

“Your hips are perfect,” he said, and gave them a squeeze for good measure.

“Why thank you, Mr. Northman,” I said, and gave us both a bit of whipped cream. “Where are we eating?”

“How about out on the balcony?” he suggested.

“Yeah, that sounds good.”

“Ice cream always tastes better when it’s hot outside. I don’t know why that is,” he said, and led me to the balcony off the living room.

“Yeah it does. It’s beautiful out tonight.”

“A little warm for my liking, but not horrible,” he said, and took a seat next to me.

“Thank you for inviting me over,” I said, then took a bite of the ice cream.

“You’re welcome,” he said, and did the same.

“I really do appreciate how calm you’re being about all of this.”

“I’m not one for panic. There’s a solution to every problem,” he said after he swallowed.

“There is,” I nodded. “And I think it’s what I need. When I’m freaking, you stay calm, like my rock.”

“Or maybe I’m just better at hiding it when I freak out,” he suggested before taking another big bite of his ice cream.

“Why?” I frowned. “Are you?”

“Not at the moment,” he said a minute later.

“But have you?”

“Yeah, I have,” he admitted.

“Why wouldn’t you share that with me?”

He was quiet for a minute before he said, “Because I didn’t want to make you any more nervous than you already are. The night we found out about the pregnancy I didn’t sleep very much. I spent most of it on your porch.”

“Oh,” I said, and looked down at my bowl, then started eating it again. I wasn’t sure what to tell him that wasn’t going to come out wrong.

“It’s fine, Sookie,” he said reassuringly. “I just didn’t want you to think I was going to bolt on you, or that I’d changed my mind because I won’t and I haven’t. There’s just a lot to think about.”

“But I need you to be honest with me.”

“I have been honest with you.”

“You didn’t tell me you were freaking out, Eric.”

“I didn’t see the point,” he shrugged. “Do you tell me every thought that goes through your mind?”

“It’s not like that,” I sighed.

“So I should have woken you up in the middle of the night?”

“If you needed to.”

“But I didn’t. I handled it on my own,” he said.

“I would have appreciated knowing that I’m not the only one freaking out though.”

He sighed and said, “I’m just better at dealing with that sort of stuff on my own. I’m not the kind of person that likes to talk it out, you know?”

“Okay,” I said. If he didn’t like talking about it, then I couldn’t force him.

“It’s not because I don’t trust you,” he offered a few minutes later. “It’s just the way I’ve always been. Maybe I need to change that.”

“When you’re in a relationship, you have to trust your partner,” I said. “Especially in a time like this. I need to know what you’re feeling, or I end up feeling alone.”

“Then I’ll work on it,” he said. “But I can’t make you any promises.”

“I understand that. I’d just appreciate it if you could try.”

“I’ll give it a shot,” he said, and then went inside to take care of his empty bowl.

I started eating my half-melted ice cream again, but I still felt a little sad. I chalked it up to Eric being a guy, and guys don’t really share their feelings that often. Plus we hadn’t been together too long.

Eric came back out a minute later and sat down again. I laid my head on his shoulder, and he wrapped his arm around me.

“You ate too fast.”

“I always eat fast.”

“Oh I know,” I said, and then smiled. “I know that intimately, even.”

“Is that a complaint?”

“Not in the least.”

“I would hope not, otherwise you’ve been faking it.”

“I have never faked it with you,” I admitted. “You’ve never given me a reason to.”

“But you have in the past?”

“Yeah,” I said sheepishly. “I’m not proud of it.”

“Did the guy notice?”

“He didn’t seem to.”

“Then I hope you dumped him.”

“After a while, I did.”

“First boyfriend?”

“No.”

“That sucks.”

“Yeah, I definitely know how lucky I am with you,” I smiled up at him.

“Likewise,” he smiled back at me.

“So you’ve never faked it with me?” I asked with a teasing grin.

“I don’t even know how I would do that,” he laughed. “But no, I haven’t.”

“You guys are too lucky. You know every time you do it you’re going to bust a nut.”

“Oh you think so?” he arched an eyebrow. “It’s entirely possible to lose it, you know.”

“Does that happen often?”

“Not to me,” he said. “It did once in college, but I was drunk at the time so that probably had something to do with it.”

“Poor girl.”

“Eh,” he shrugged. “It was probably better that I didn’t sleep with her. I can’t even remember her name.”

“That’s college,” I chuckled.

“Uh huh,” he laughed along with me. “And it didn’t help that I went to one of the biggest party schools in the country, but my priorities were different back then.”

“So I take it there’s enough notches on your belt to make a lovely decorative design.”

“Something like that,” he said, but offered nothing further on the topic.

“It’s okay,” I said, and patted his knee. “I’m not going to freak out about it. It’s not like I was a virgin when we met.”

“Yeah,” he laughed and said, “In my experience it’s rarely a good idea to talk about the number of people you’ve been with in the past.”

“I’ve never had a problem talking about it,” I shrugged.

“I don’t have a problem with it either, but girls usually do,” he said.

“I’m not most girls,” I said. “The only number I’d give a shit about is the number of girls you were with while you’re with me, and since I know that one’s zero then I have no issues.”

“Good,” he said, and kissed my head. Then he yawned. “I need to go to bed. I have to be up early tomorrow. You’re welcome to stay if you want to.”

“If you don’t mind, I’d like to,” I said.

“Of course not,” he stood up and offered a hand to me to help me up.

“Let me just take my bowl to the kitchen,” I said.

“Okay. I’ll be in the bedroom,” he said, and headed that way once we were inside.

I took my bowl to the kitchen and rinsed it out, then turned off the light and went back to join him.

“Need a t-shirt to sleep in?” he offered, and then smirked. “Or do you just want to sleep naked?”

“If I crawl in that bed naked, you’re not going to get the sleep you want,” I smiled.

“Only if you can’t control yourself,” he said as he pulled back the comforter.

“That’s awfully hard with you,” I said. “I’ll take a t-shirt.”

He nodded and went to his dresser to grab one of his t-shirts for me. Eric handed it to me and then went to the bathroom, presumably to brush his teeth. I got undressed and pulled on his t-shirt then waited for him to come out so I could go in and do the same.

“It’s all yours,” Eric said when he came back to the bedroom a few minutes later.

“Thanks,” I smiled, and went in to use the bathroom and brush my teeth with my finger. I’d have to ask him about leaving a toothbrush there, but I wasn’t sure how he’d react to it. He was already under the covers when I came out again and I climbed in next to him.

“You know, I was just thinking,” he said, and reached over to turn off the light on his bedside table. “If you wanted to leave some stuff in the bathroom, I’m okay with that. You know, toothbrush, deodorant…”

I looked at him suspiciously and asked, “Are you a telepath?”

“No,” he looked at me just as oddly. “It just seems logical. You sleep here often enough and that’s got to be easier than always having to worry about having a bag packed or something.”

“You’re right, it’s just that while I was in the bathroom I was thinking that I should ask you if you would be okay with that, and then you said it.”

“I think that’s what’s known as being on the same page,” he smiled at me.

“Or you’re a telepath,” I giggled.

“Or that,” he said, and adjusted his pillow.

“I should hope not. I don’t want you knowing all the dirty things in my brain.”

“How dirty are they?” he smirked.

“Pretty filthy.”

“This sounds interesting. Have I ever told you I like bedtime stories?”

“Ahh, but if I tell you the story your reaction wouldn’t be to go to sleep soundly.”

“You have no faith in me,” he said dramatically.

“So if I told you that I’m a girl who likes to be spanked and told she’s a dirty girl, you’d just roll over and go right to sleep?”

“I’d need time to plot,” he said matter of factly.

“Well that’s… disappointing.”

“But you were speaking in hypotheticals,” he pointed out.

“If you hypothetically need time to plot out a way to fuck me, spank me, and call me a dirty girl, then I’m not sure I want to tell you all my thoughts.”

“Then you would be missing out,” he sighed.

“How so?”

“Because if that’s what you want, I would gladly give it to you.”

“Right now?”

“Right now is for sleeping, minx.”

I pouted at him.

“I thought you were here to sleep?” he reminded me.

“I’m not the one that said that,” I smirked.

“Believe me, if I didn’t have to be up at four, I would be all over it,” he assured me.

“Why so early?”

“Because I’m going to the gym before work in the morning and I have a conference call I have to be on at seven, since it’s with an east coast client,” he explained.

“Then I won’t tell you any more of my desires,” I said, and mimed zipping my lips.

“You can tell me tomorrow,” he yawned again. “Preferably in text messages. It’ll keep me awake.”

“I might even send you a couple pictures,” I smiled, and snuggled into his side.

“That would be lovely,” he wrapped an arm around me.

“Goodnight, Eric.”

“Night, Sookie,” he kissed my head.

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