Lina Bachir

“abuse is the opposite of love. The more a man abuses you, the more he is demonstrating that he cares only about himself. He may feel a powerful desire to receive your love and caretaking, but he only wants to give love when it’s convenient.”
― Lundy Bancroft, Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men

“An abuser who does not relinquish his core entitlements will not remain non-abusive. This may be the single most overlooked point regarding abusers and change. The progress that such a man appears to be making is an illusion. If he reserves the right to bully his partner, to protect even one specific priviledge, he is keeping the abuse option open. And if he keeps it open, he will gradually revert to using it more and more until his prior range of controlling behaviors has been restored to it's full glory.”
― Lundy Bancroft, Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men

“You must navigate by means of your own natural compass."
"And if my compass is broken?"
"Then you must learn to compensate. Sail a little crooked, make adjustments, but you must set your own course, or the journey is meaningless." (page 357)”
― Kathleen Tessaro, Rare Objects

“When you go through the moments where you are questioning yourself whether or not it was abuse, remember the way it made you feel. Push away the nostalgia that is trying to minimize it, trying to trick you like a bad magician at a children’s party that the rabbit did come from the hat, that love and abuse come from the same hat.”
― Nikita Gill, Your Heart is the Sea